Locke and Key
by Rise and Fall
Summary: A game is made so much more interesting when lives are at stake. Leaf, a fierce girl from Kanto, taught to be self-reliant, realizes that Pokemon are more than tools, and being a trainer is not like being a gunslinger. These bullets die. A Nuzlocke Story.
1. Eyes of Fire

**Locke and Key:** _A Nuzlocke Story_

**Summary: **Leaf is a badass girl from Kanto who takes no prisoners. Fatherless and with a mother she's determined not to disappoint eternally, Leaf sets out with one goal in mind: to make something of herself: a name, a song… a story. This is it.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Pokemon LeafGreen, or anything about the games. I also don't own the Nuzlocke method, or the comics this story is heavily based on (Hale's Emerald Hard-Mode, the original Nuzlocke comics, etc.)

_Important Note: _Many chapters from this story utilize lyrics from songs that fit the chapter's mood or tone. The links to each song, with the chapter's name, are in my profile in a long, pretty, organized list that took me forever to make. :)  
- 8/28/11

**Claimer:** I own the Pokemon seen here. As in, they're on my game cartridge, haha. This story is actually a dramatization of my own Nuzlocke Challenge experiences on Pokemon LeafGreen. All of the "deaths" happened, as did the captures, namings, etc.

For those of you who aren't familiar with the Nuzlocke Challenge, I highly suggest it, but just in case, I'll put it here:

There are two basic rules.

You can only capture the first Pokemon you encounter in each new area (Route, cave, city, etc.) If that Pokemon faints or runs away (Whirlwind, Roar, etc.), too bad. You don't get a Pokemon in that area, and you move on.

When a Pokemon faints, it is pronounced "dead" and must be released via the PC. Pansy players deposit theirs in a permanent box. But I'm hardcore like that. ;]

There are some modifications, but those are the rules.

In this story, they will be actual deaths, not releases.

Anyways, comments, concerns, blah blah, I accept anything and everything. (If I even get readers for this, lol.)

Enjoy!

* * *

_'They say_ _that_ _your eyes_ _contain_ _fire_, _that_ _your_ _face fills with light.'_

-Kate Elliot

* * *

I wasn't looking for trouble. Hell, I wasn't even _looking_ for Pokemon. I just needed to get away from my mother, and I was aching for a cigarette. She was driving me absolutely insane.

I stepped into the tall grass, fumbling in my pocked for that last little cylinder of hope. _Surely, nothing's gonna attack me. The smell of the smoke'll drive them away,_ I thought to myself, perhaps foolishly. The tip of the lighter kissed the cigarette, and I touched it to my lips, exhaling my anxieties.

I leaned against the fence, then hopped up on it, the wood pleasantly pressing into my legs beneath the skirt I wore. It was such a nice day outside, the sun warm but not hostile, the wind crisp but not cold. I could hear the kids playing in the schoolyard inside the town, but out here, it was peaceful.

_Why don't I ever come out here?_ I thought hazily.

Suddenly, the grass behind me stirred; I turned, dropping burning ash onto the ground as I did. It caught fire to some strands of dry grass, which panicked me into dropping the whole cigarette.

Bad idea. The tuft caught fire.

And through it, a Pidgey flew out, eyes crazed.

_Shit. _That's_ why I don't ever come out here,_ I thought, sharper now.

The damn thing was _glaring _at me, it's brown and white feathers ruffled. Like it was a _cat_, or something, that got squirted with a water bottle. Have you ever been face to face with a Pidgey? Black mask like it's fucking Zorro, or something? I didn't think so. Those things have strong wings and are very determined.

I ran.

Like a pansy.

I hoped I kicked dirt onto it, because it became disturbed behind me. I turned back, grabbing at my aching side, to see it kicking sand onto the tuft of grass I'd set on fire.

Awh. It cared about the grass. Isn't that cute?

I was about to walk back when I heard a stern clearing of the throat behind me. I turned, expecting my mother or some old crone telling me not to smoke, but instead I saw a tall, broad-shouldered man, his labcoat pure, his eyes sharp and critical. Oak?

Crap.

"Professor, hi," I stammered, blinking. I wasn't afraid of him, but come _on_. The way he was looking at me could boil lake water in Sinnoh. Anyways… he was one of the few authority figures that actually spit some sense into me.

"Leaf, is that right? Leaf Brannigan?" Why was he looking at me like that? Was it the smoking thing? _Shit, I shouldn't have come out here,_ I thought, slightly depressed.

"Yeah. I'm Leaf."

"You're in the same class as my grandson, aren't you?"

"Oh. Green?" _That prick._ "Yeah. He's in my class. We don't really know each other that well, though." _And thank God for it._

"It's a pity. You seemed like a nice girl, Leaf, but…" he walked past me, knocking me aside slightly. I froze, turning to see him pick up my discarded cigarette from the darkened pile of grass and the Pidgey.

Instead of attacking him, the Pidgey looked up at him, and I swear the damn thing smiled. It nuzzled against his hand, then flew off.

I was dumbfounded. That savage little bird just tried to attack me! Oak really was magical.

"You dropped a burning cigarette into a pile of dry grass. Leaf, wild Pokemon live in this grass. You could have started a serious fire, and destroyed their habitat," he said, his tone scolding.

I was, again, confused. He was yelling at me for disturbing the Pidgey and Rattata around here? And… not for smoking?

I mean, yeah, I was fifteen, but still. The legal age in Kanto is twenty-one (miles behind the other regions; Hoenn's age was sixteen!), but most of the kids I knew smoked.

"I'm… sorry," I stammered again, wishing my spine didn't turn to jelly in front of the professor. I wasn't one to back down from flaming eyes, but his held something far more powerful than most of my competitors. He must have been a serious trainer in his day, really; if I was on the battlefield with him, I'd probably forfeit.

"You should be. If that Pidgey hadn't stopped that fire…" He shook himself, then glanced at me.

His eyes caught mine, and we stared for awhile. I was tempted to back down – to look away – but I took a deep breath and held his iron gaze. After a few moments, he smiled slightly.

"Leaf, have you ever considered becoming a trainer?"

A trainer? Me? Most kids who became Pokemon trainers didn't make it – especially from Pallet Town. We were known as the loser's town. We had a horrible football team, too. Everyone made fun of the losers from this hick town.

"Not really. I mean… I guess it'd be pretty cool, though. It's not like I can do much else, the way I do in school," I said honestly. Let's face it, it's true. Skipping all of your important classes isn't the best way to get scholarships.

He studied me for a moment, then nodded.

"Would you like a Pokemon of your own?"

"I… why are you offering me this?" I said, astounded. He had just gotten onto me for almost catching the grassland on fire! What was going on?

"I think you have a lot of unspent aggression, and I think it'd be best spent on the battlefield," he said, honest as I was; it sort of pierced me. What was I expecting, that he thought I had potential? Me? Right.

"Also… I think this will save you from yourself, Leaf. Pokemon change you in ways you'd never expect," he said, and he looked like he was talking about more than one thing at once. Himself? Had Oak been a hell-raiser like me, back in his day?

_I doubt they'll make me into any angel, but who knows?_ "Well… yeah. I'd like a Pokemon. And hey, anything to get me out of Pallet Town."

A ghost of a smile flew over his lips – wingshadows from a distant bird.

"Why don't you come by my lab at… 2:45 today? I'll have three for you to choose from. Right now, why don't you go tell your mother that you'll be gone for awhile?"

I blinked, then nodded, not sure what to say. He straightened, then walked out of the grass – with dignity that I knew I'd never have, even if I conquered every single region. I smiled too – more sad than Oak's had been – and followed, knowing that I'd be back in the grass in less than a day.


	2. Let's Ride

**Locke and Key:** _A Nuzlocke Story_

* * *

"All the best cowboys have daddy issues."  
– _Lost_ / Senses Fail.

* * *

I wanted to tell my mother about Oak. I really did. But as soon as I walked into the house to do it, she lit into me for walking out on her while she was lecturing me. You know, the fight where I stormed off, smoked a cigarette, and pissed off a Pidgey.

"Leaf, I try so hard to help this family," she sighed, exhausted with her temper and with mine. She sat down heavily in her old wooden chair – the one she used to say my father brought over from Johto – and put her head in her hands.

I flinched at the word "family". Now, don't get me wrong – I love my mother. But I'm not a very lovey-dovey person, and the "big, warm, happy family" thing has always turned my stomach a little. We've been striving to make ends meet since I was six. And, as women will do when trapped in a poor household, we got catty. My claws came out just then, but I didn't use them.

"Mom, I'm sorry," I sighed, coming up behind her. "I have some good news, though. Or, at least, I think it's good news?"

She didn't look up.

"What is it?"

"You know Oak? The professor here in town?" I was hoping for excitement, but when she snapped her head up, there was a new darkness lurking in the Kelly green of her eyes – the eyes I inherited and the eyes I assumed were my namesake.

"Who _doesn't_ know him? Professor Oak is a big deal here." She didn't inquire further; maybe she knew what I was going to say before I said it.

"Well…" I walked away from her, nervous by the dark stare I was getting, the sudden nervous lip chewing, the folding of her hands in her thin lap. I picked up a figure on our bookshelf – a Growlithe puppy blowing fire into the air – and turned it around in my hands idly.

"Oak saw me out in the tall grass," I blurted, ignoring the shrew gasp from her. No mother wanted to hear that their child was playing around in Pokemon-infested grass without, well, Pokemon. But I went on, not giving her a chance to scold me:

"He told me that he saw potential in me. That maybe I'd be a good trainer." This was partly a lie, but maybe he thought it. Why would he offer a free Pokemon to someone if they didn't have potential? "He offered me a starter, and now I'm thinking about leaving home."

"Leaving home? But… what about school?" My mother asked, trying a different route. I didn't know why she looked so nervous; I'd already told her my plan.

"I'm not doin' too great in school, anyways, Mom," I pointed out. "Look, if I fail as a trainer, I promise, I'll come back home and go to school. But I can't just _not try_. I might make it big. I might be able to make something of myself!"

"That's what all children your age think," she jabbed, and I winced. Was she referring to my father? "They think that they're safe with Pokemon, that they're the best there is, and then…" She trailed off.

I wasn't sure if she was going to stop me or not, but I wasn't taking chances. The clock was ticking by, and I was prepared to run for the door if I had too. However, a change came over her, lifting the dark from her face and bringing some soft-looking light to it.

"Leaf, if you must do this thing… promise me you'll give me a call. Let me know you're not dead."

"When?" I whispered. I was touched and slightly excited.

_A Pokemon journey. Me, Leaf Brannigan, a trainer. Who would've thought?_

"How about Pewter City? If you make it that far, I'd like you to call me there."

That's my mom for you. Optimistic.

"Alright, Mom. I will. I promise. And I _will_ make it – you'll see." I walked past her, anxious to get my Pokemon.

She turned to see me in the doorway, and as a shaft of sunlight fell on her tired face from the window, she smiled slightly.

"Good luck, Leaf. I love you."

Then I closed the door, blinking away useless tears that really came for no reason.

* * *

"Well, Leaf, you're… almost on time," Professor Oak said as I walked through his door. The lab was cool, air conditioned, and the aides in lab coats looked my way with slight interest. I probably wasn't the usual customer, in a tattered skirt and white hat askew, but whatever.

"Hey, I walked here. Give me a break." I noticed someone else in the lab, and groaned inwardly. Green. Green Motherfucking Oak - the quarterback of our (suckish) football team, gorgeous genius, town's idol, and Professor Oak's own arrogant grandson.

_Jesus, do I ever get a break?_

"Oh." Green's lip curled when he saw me, and I couldn't help feeling ashamed of my cheap clothes, unbrushed hair and tired eyes. He was used to beautiful women fawning all over him - and I was not up to his standards, I'll say that much. Not that I cared what he wanted. "When you said you'd gotten someone else from my school, I thought... well, why her, Gramps? She's… not…" He chose his words carefully, flipping a hand through spiky blonde hair in an offhand manner. "_Trainer_ material."

"And just why not?" I barked. I knew all about him. Green Oak. He had a full ride to a college in Celadon City, perfect grades, a beautiful girlfriend and several other admirers, and, hell, now he wanted to be a trainer.

He looked offended, but Oak quickly stepped in to settle the dust between us.

"I called you two here for a real reason," he said quickly. "Leaf, pick your starter Pokemon. Green, you can pick second."

Did I look fucking stupid? He'd just get the one that could beat mine. I could tell by the look in his clear blue eyes - mocking, the smirk tugging at his lips.

But, the good sport that I am, I sighed and went up to his desk anyways. Three Poke Balls sat before me, and without thinking, I grabbed the one on the far right.

Oak gave me an intrigued look. "That's Charmander, the Fire type. If you choose it, you'll have a lot of patient training to do," he warned. "Maybe you should stick with Bulbasaur; it grows levels much faster. Or Squirtle; it learns powerful attacks quickly…"

"No. I want Charmander," I said petulantly.

He smiled slightly, then nodded.

"Go…" I thought for a moment. "Kashen!"

The ball split to reveal a small orange lizard, its eyes liquid and friendly. A long tail was crowned with a spark of flame. I loved it already; the fierce look was quieted by the cute sparkle of its eyes.

Green stepped up behind me, then grabbed the one Oak had said learns powerful moves. Squirtle? I freaking hate Water types.

"Let's battle… hey, what's your name, anyways?"

"I go to school with you, you dick," I said in my most bitchy manner. "I'm Leaf."

He raised one perfect dark gold eyebrow over eyes of crystalline blue. "The one who was suspended for smoking in the bathroom?"

I smirked lightly. So, I was infamous. I kinda liked it.

"That's me. Go, Kashen!"

Liking that it - he? - had a name, Kashen stomped up, trying to look fierce – for my benefit, maybe – and failing miserably.

"Go, Squirtle!" The asshole said, choosing a little blue thing with a gold shell.

In a guttural voice, it said, "Squirtle squirt!"

"Kashen, Scratch!"

"Squirtle, Tackle!"

I won't bore you with that battle. Let's just say, after whittling the poor Water type down with as many Scratches as he could get in, Kashen won, Tackled almost into exhaustion.

Battered and panting, my Charmander smiled triumphantly.

"What?" Green glared at his Squirtle. "I picked the wrong Pokemon!"

"Yep. Not my problem. Let's get outta here, Kashen."

And off he strolled as the sun began to light upon the horizon like a tired bird. Burning beside me, my new friend looked up, his eyes glowing – like there was a fire in his soul, too. I petted him on the head, happy with the day.

And, hell, I – Leaf Brannigan – was now a Pokemon trainer, registered with the Indigo League of Kanto. Leaf Brannigan, fatherless delinquent, and Kashen the Charmander, a badass Fire type – I felt pretty cool and fairly confident.

But, oh God, had I known what was to come, would I have stayed behind?...

* * *

**Current Team:**

Charmander: "Kashen" - Male, Level 6


	3. A Soul Shared

**Locke and Key:** _A Nuzlocke Story_

* * *

"Friendship is a single soul dwelling in two bodies."

-Aristotle

* * *

Kashen and I made good time, training in Route 1. His claws proved to be his best weapon in the beginning – they cut up Pidgeys and made mincemeat of Rattata.

Staring at the wreckage of weak rodents and birds around me, I wondered aloud, "Is there anything in this damn grass besides Pidgey and Rattata?"

_Not on this game,_ Kashen's eyes seemed to say. I shrugged, and we continued, seeing the tops of the buildings ahead – Viridian City!

"Wow. I've only been here once, on a field trip in junior high," I told Kashen absently. He yawned as if to say "cool story bro", then walked ahead of me, tail bright in the falling dusk. I followed, amazed by what I saw.

This place had a Pokemon Center! Pallet Town had one in the '90's, but it went out of business pretty quick. _That's_ how few trainers we had. Can you say fucking depressing?

I was pretty excited about the Pokemon Center. I grabbed Kashen by his tail – the non-fiery part, that is – and dragged him inside, my eyes wide. There was a sofa to the left, with a rigid guy sitting on it. Some random people milled about. In the corner was a computer. A sign above it said "PC – Any Trainer's Game". I blinked, amazed. What _didn't_ this place have?

At the counter, a smiling nurse called, "Hello, trainer! Would you like me to heal your Pokemon?"

"Fuck yeah," I said, throwing Kashen up there. She ran his Poke Ball under some machine, then handed him back to me.

"We hope to see you again!" She crowed as I walked out.

"That's fucking sick," I said, but I knew she would see me again. And again. And again. Et cetera.

Kashen and I walked back into the streets. Houses stood tall, kids played in the streets with their small Normal and Bug types, and then… I saw it.

The Pokemon Mart.

My heart momentarily stopped beating.

They… have… a _Pokemon Mart_?" I screeched. I ran inside, Kashen with me, but when I walked in I was sorely disappointed.

"Hey, kid, you from Pallet Town? Yes? Good. Take this to Oak." He passed it to me, a random box, and I twitched.

"Sure. Can I get some-"

"Hey, kid, you from Pallet Town? Yes? Good…"

"Fucking useless."

I stomped out, pissy, but I brightened at the prospect of more training. And, hey, maybe Oak would give me some free Poke Balls? You couldn't _always_ be helpful to those in need of charity, I know, but I had only one won battle – against Green – and he hadn't given me too much to live off of.

"Okay, Kashen, let's get that stupid Pidgey. Look at him, level _four_, just sitting there, begging to be clawed mercilessly."

Kashen looked bored. He certainly wasn't the fighting machine I expected – he was calm and obedient. Whatever. I only smiled as he Scratch'd the Pidgey into oblivion.

Suddenly, he looked up, mouth exhaling a small flame – a bit of heat, a scrap of fire – hope!

"Wait – is that… Ember?" I asked, smiling.

"Char, charmander," he confirmed, smiling back. He released a small puff of fire into the air again, and I nodded approvingly.

"You're a freakin' beast now, Kashen."

Now, instead of scraping Pidgey and Rattata off of his claws, he merely sent their smoldering bodies flying.

It pleased me.

It was nearly nine o' clock when we reached Pallet Town again, but Kashen was much stronger than he had been when we left, and, frankly, I was far more comfortable ordering a Pokemon around. Battling wasn't too hard, really. I thought I might even be ready for another Pokemon, which was why I was hoping for Balls from Oak.

"Oh, welcome back, Leaf," he said, then noticed the package in my arms. "For me? I guess my package came in." He took it from me and unwrapped it carefully, revealing two shiny red machines. I narrowed my eyes suspiciously – this didn't look good.

Behind me, the doors were flung open, and Green stalked up to Oak. "Hey, Gramps, what'd you need me for?"

I flinched, but said nothing.

"Leaf, Green. I want you each to take one of these Pokedexes. They'll automatically record data on every Pokemon you capture, and a little even on the ones you see."

Before Green could say anything, I blurted, "You expect me to catch every Pokemon?"

"Well, yes…"

"Duh." Green cast a wary eye on me. "Don't be so stupid. Only the best trainers have every single Pokemon."

"Is that your plan, Green?" I asked callously.

"I did say the best." He smirked arrogantly.

"And will all of those Pokemon be trained, or dumped in the PC?" I said, snide.

He didn't reply, only said, "Anyways, smell ya later, Gramps."

"What a dipshit," I snorted after he left. Sadly, Professor Oak didn't disagree with me. His aides gave me five Poke Balls, and I set out.

"Okay, Kashen," I said, smiling. "We're going to get a new friend, and then we're going to camp out. 'Cause there ain't no way I'm sleeping in some hospital where weird trainers come in during the night to mess around."

"Charr," he agreed, nodding.

"Let's do this."

A serious feeling crept into me – the shadows moved, and I began to have flashbacks to earlier in the day, when a furious Pidgey had put out the fire I'd started with a cigarette. The Pidgey that nuzzled against Oak's hand when he reached out to it.

Would I get a fierce little bird like that, to fly alongside me, razor wings clipping the sky?

Then I recalled the stubborn little bitches Kashen had been cutting and burning all afternoon. Lithe, lavender, their teeth bared and their feet quick, Rattata wasn't about to back down.

Or would I get a determined rat, racing around the foe, clever thief, cuddly on my lap?

I took a Poke Ball from my pack, let it expand in my hand.

"Go in there, Kashen," I said seriously. "Let's get this over with. I don't like suspense."

He looked at me appraisingly, then jumped in. The grass around him rustled, and the two jumped into my clear vision – Kashen faced a Rattata, level two, male. Its teeth glinted, wicked sharp, in the moonlight, and its red eyes stared crazily into Kashen's.

"…Okay. I can work with this, I guess."

Straightening up, I commanded, "Kashen, use Scratch; be gentle. I don't want the little fucker dying on me before I can—"

"Ra!" It screeched, jumping for Kashen quickly. It Tackle'd him, but Kashen sent him reeling with a Scratch – a heavy swipe of claws, not the light attack I wanted. I was afraid it'd be dead, but as I ran over it, it slowly struggled to its feet again, its HP on, like, 1 or 2.

Fearful, I threw the Ball in my hand and watched it fly open, trapping the Rattata's energy inside. It tilted slightly, then clicked shut – the Pokemon was _mine_.

"I… I did it," I whispered, cradling the capsule. "I caught my first Pokemon."

Kashen walked up to me; he seemed to be smiling as he reached out with a claw to touch the Poke Ball we held between us. It seemed to be a rite – pact, a symbolic movement of our friendship, and of the journey that lie ahead.

Now, I'm not one to trust anyone – but trusting a human and trusting a Pokemon are so different. People, well, you know they're going to fail you.

But Pokemon? I'm not sure they _can_ fail. If they do fail – well, it's your fault.

I felt my heart opening up to this creature, a young Charmander I'd gotten by fate, a Fire type with no family and friends… except me.

And now, this Rattata, a rodent I'd plucked from the grass, maybe snatched it away from everything it ever knew.

With this Pokemon, not only did we expand our team, but we sealed our bond.

"Tobias," I whispered, and only then did Kashen take his claw off of the Poke Ball.

His eyes were warm as the fire on his tail, and I felt like we were going to get along just fine.

* * *

The night in the woods was a little brutal, I'll admit. I'm no pansy, you know, but I _have_ been used to a mattress, comforter, and a pillow my whole life. Instead, I got the ground, a Fire Pokemon curled up beside me, tail safe distance away, and a Poke Ball clipped to my hip. Pidgey made cooing noises from the trees, and Rattata chattered at us from a distance.

Sleep was hard to find, but once I sought it, it overwhelmed me, pulling me into dark currents and darker dreams.

When I awoke hours later, all I could remember was a sense of failure – and a stronger feeling of punishment.

* * *

"Okay, guys," I told my Pokemon, both strolling beside me. I had been nervous about training Tobias, but really, he was pretty good for a Rattata – he already knew Quick Attack, which was a fairly useful move. I was proud of what I had so far.

"We're going into the forest, since all I've found in the other Routes along here are other Rattata. So, hopefully we'll have decent luck here."

As we entered, something seemed off – the music? The half-rabid Bug Catchers twitching around? The Kakuna dripping from the tree, hinting that there may be Beedrill around? What?

I had heard rumors of Pikachu roaming around here, and I knew my luck wasn't that great, but… hell, a girl could hope, right?

I paused before stepping into the tall grass, deciding to get it over with.

"Piiii," a cute, small voice gurgled.

Caterpie. Freaking naturally. Oh well.

"Tobias, Quick Attack."

Moving with lightning speed, Tobias knocked over the large-eyed insect - which was kind of cute, if you stared at it long enough.

I tossed the Poke Ball, and it clicked shut.

I smiled as it stopped struggling and accepted ownership. I knelt down to pick it up, and Kashen stepped forward, his claw on the Ball. We met eyes, and the affect I'd felt the night before came over me again – one of chains binding us together through more than master and slave, but of souls working together in this life.

"Grigori," I muttered. The name of my Caterpie seemed to please Kashen and Tobias; they showed their affection openly this time, Tobias licking me on the cheek and Kashen crossing his arms and nodding, a smirk on his face.

Well, three Pokemon isn't a bad start, is it? Grigori, Tobias, Kashen and I would continue to train for Brock's gym, and for the rest of the Indigo League.

But sunshine is always followed by rain, isn't it?

That had always been my experience, my whole life. So why had I forgotten? Why hadn't I seen the gray stirring in the sky – the darkness blocking the sun?

* * *

**Current Team:**

Charmander: "Kashen" - Male, Level 13

Rattata: "Tobias" - Male, Level 12

Caterpie: "Grigori" - Male, Level 4


	4. Regret

**Locke and Key:** _A Nuzlocke Story_

* * *

"Many of us crucify ourselves between two thieves - regret for the past and fear of the future."

-Fulton Oursler

* * *

Caterpie's not very tough, right? I wasn't stupid – well, I didn't think I was, anyway. It's usually not a good idea to cling to Bug types throughout your Pokemon journey.

But I was enamored with Grigori, his big, beautifully watering eyes, his little pink horn, the plushy, firm green feel of him in my arms. I couldn't wait until I went to face Brock – Leaf Brannigan, the girl with the Butterfree, the Rattata, and the Charmander.

The girl who would kick Brock's ass without breaking a sweat.

My infatuation with Grigori was my first mistake.

With hopes of a Butterfree in mind, I released Grigori from his Poke Ball after a run to the Center in Viridian. He emerged in a flash of white, eyes soulful.

"Hi, Grigori," I said, my voice turning noticeably softer. I felt like I was talking to a baby, really. It wasn't like me to have this gentle side – and maybe Grigori realized that his trainer was favoring him right now. I was sure the other Pokemon felt it – Tobias and Kashen were both sealed tight in their Balls.

"Priiii," Grigori said, sounding happy.

"I'm gonna train you down here in Route 1, okay? When you're a big, strong Butterfree, you'll be ready for the forest again. And then…" my voice got dramatic, "…Brock."

"Pipi." Grigori nodded as if he understood.

We strolled into the grass, noticing a Rattata right away, chattering uselessly and gnawing on a random Berry.

"Okay, use String Shot, Grigori," I ordered.

He crawled forward slowly, aimed his little pale mouth at the Rattata, and spit a white, frothy string at it – the rat was tangled and began to move slower and clumsier. I took the chance.

"Get it, Grigori! Tackle!"

He shot forward, barely hurting the Rattata. It merely licked its barely-bruised shoulder.

The battle went on for awhile, but Grigori wasn't going anywhere. The Rattata had almost full health, and Grigori was panting and looking sort of pained.

I sighed, loathe to do what I had to do. I returned my Caterpie, and sent out Tobias.

"Quick Attack!"

Tobias shot forward, a lightning blur compared to the slowness of Grigori. My Rattata took the wild Rattata's remaining health down, and it collapsed feebly.

Despite the victory, I was in a sour mood after that.

I never wanted to do the "switch out" method of training – it just bothered me to share experience, you know? Grigori had done most of the work. He _earned_ all of that experience. Angrily, I hiked up to the Pokemon Center again.

When I came out, Grigori was ready for battle again, shiny-eyed and making those cute little "priii" sounds. I lost some of my bitter attitude, smiling down at him.

"Okay. Let's try this again."

Another Rattata – a higher-leveled one – came out of the grass, baring teeth at us, and I used the opportunity.

"Okay, Grigori, String Shot!"

He slowed the little fucker down, then Tackle'd it mercilessly. I was impressed – he was much fiercer than Kashen, although perhaps not as manic as Tobias.

"Great job! You only have two more levels until evolution, Grigori," I purred, satisfied with the way things were going.

The sun was nigh when our luck ran out. Instead of a Rattata, a Pidgey came at us from the grass, pecking the ground loosely.

The sharp, hawklike eyes of the Flying type met my Caterpie's enormous, liquid eyes, and I knew the battle was on. Grigori shot a String Shot at the clawed feet of the bird, but it dodged it deftly, sending sand flying towards Grigori's eyes.

"No! Ugh, damn it!"

_Switch out, Leaf,_ I heard a voice nag me from the shadows, the crevices of my mind where only nightmares lurked. _Don't take any stupid chances._

"Life's all about taking chances," I argued angrily, then shouted: "Tackle! Come on, ram that fucker into an early grave, Grigori!"

After spamming Tackle like mad, I thought we had it.

I really did.

But the tawny-feathered fiend made a quick come back after a missed Tackle from Grigori – as my little worm was turned around, confused at having missed his target, the Pidgey hit him with its own, slightly stronger Tackle, and Grigori fell, exhausted and weakened.

I fought against the urge to recall him. The Pidgey was close to death, and Grigori's Speed was higher after the String Shot I'd used. I wanted him to have this experience, really.

So I made the first big mistake I'd ever make as a trainer.

I risked my Pokemon's life.

"Grigori, Tackle!"

With narrowed eyes, he lunged, but the Pidgey hovered over him; blinded by sand, Grigori had missed his target once again.

Turning back around, the Pidgey used Tackle – and it was a fucking critical hit.

Grigori let out a shriek of pain – "_Priiiiiiii!_" – and then collapsed, skidding in the dirt towards my feet.

Shock traveled through me, nailing my feet to the ground.

_What… what just happened? What's wrong? What... what did I do?_

"Grigori?" I said, appalled to find my voice trembling.

_No. I will not cry. That's not going to help anything. I… won't… cry._

I knelt by the little body of my third friend, noticing the labored breathing of an injured Pokemon wasn't there. His plump green abdomen was still. And his eyes were half-closed, glazed instead of sparkling and liquid.

I reached out to touch him, and there was no response.

Furious, with slightly blurred vision, I glanced up, seeing the bastard bird that killed him – Grigori, my Caterpie – and fury crawled over me like hot little spiders.

"You motherfucker," I shouted, and I cringed at the crack in my voice.

Without any further words, I fumbled for a Poke Ball clipped to my hip – any of them would do – and released Kashen in a brilliant flash of white light. He seemed confused, at first, standing there with a weakened Pidgey before him, but when he turned around, he saw his master, kneeling on the ground with a dead Caterpie cradled in her arms.

Pain shot through my Charmander's eyes. "Chaaar," he murmured, and I swear I heard sympathy in his soft voice.

"Kill that bastard," I said, broken. "Kill him, Kashen. Please. For Grigori."

But it wasn't for Grigori. I know that now. It was for me.

For my mistake, and my fury that burned away trust, leaving ashes of guilt.

Kashen turned back to the Pidgey, struggling to flap its wings, and rushed it, his claws slick and white – amazed, I watched them dig into the Pidgey's throat and emerge, stained with blood, but shiny like blades.

Kashen's Metal Claw left the killer in ruins, but he looked at me gravely when I lifted Caterpie up. Grigori.

"I'm sorry, Kashen," I told him, and he wiped the Pidgey's blood from his sharpened nails. Kashen walked to me then, touching Grigori's face lightly.

"Charmander, char," he mourned. Looking at him, I had to struggle to hold the tears back.

* * *

We – Tobias, Kashen and I, that is – buried Grigori in the forest where I'd caught him.

I still didn't cry, though my Pokemon mourned.

In my heart, I knew whose fault it was that Grigori died. Not the Pidgey's. Not his.

It was my fucking fault.

If I hadn't taken that risk… he'd still be with us, cute and ready to become an ugly Metapod, then a lustrous Butterfree.

But no.

I had to risk his life.

And now, in my heart's darkest realms, I was paying the price.

"Come on, team," I said, my voice firm. "Let's go."

Surprised at my tone, they looked up – I know they did – but I was already walking out of the forest.

There was lost training to be made up.

We couldn't sit around all day crying for a dead bug.

* * *

I stayed one more day in Viridian City after Grigori's death. Tobias learned Hyper Fang, and Kashen's Metal Claw was perfected.

While training west of the city, I also came across Green, who was boasting about how amazing he was… and blah, blah, blah.

"Let's go, Leaf. Let's see if you can beat me _this_ time!"

He sent out a Pidgey – and was I surprised? Not really. Naturally, the fucker had to be carrying around one of those murderous, pissy birds, and as soon as I saw the cold, predatory eyes of the pigeon, I immediately thought of the broken body of Grigori.

"Go, Tobias!"

My Rattata narrowed his eyes – was he thinking what I was? Or was he just prepared to kick Green's ass? Whatever it was, I felt battle fire sizzling from his purple fur, and his Hyper Fang latched onto the Pidgey's wing, taking him down and nearly tearing it off.

"Get your demon off of my bird!" Green cried, running over.

I smirked, wanting to laugh, but it just wasn't in me today.

"Okay, Tobias, teeth out of the bird. Let him send out his other loser."

Green narrowed his blue eyes.

"Go, Squirtle!"

I pulled a foolish move and withdrew Tobias, bringing out Kashen.

I was a sucker for dramatic rival battles, and, hey, Kashen and Squirtle were just as much rivals as Green and I were, right?

Kashen lifted a claw to the sunlight, and it glinted like the clean blade of a warrior's sword.

Squirtle narrowed his eyes and drew himself into his shell, hoping to protect himself from Kashen.

Swiping hard at the shell, Kashen sent Squirtle flying near Green's ankles, where he emerged, looking a bit beat up.

"Squirtle, Bubble!"

Shit. Little bubbles streamed from Squirtle's mouth, popping on Kashen's tender, fiery skin and making him wince.

"Kashen, Ember!"

I was hoping for Squirtle to get burned, and luckily, he did. Wincing at the flames eating at his wet flesh, Squirtle was weak when Kashen attacked him with Metal Claw once again. It wasn't very effective, but still sent him reeling, staggering, and then collapsing by Green.

Green lost again.

Surprise.

"Well, Leaf, I guess you'd better stop sucking," he called as he walked off.

Was he blind…?

* * *

Viridian Forest, the second time around, wasn't tough.

Kashen and Tobias handled the Bug Catchers with finesse, and when we saw the exit, we all looked at each other with slight smiles.

"Grigori, I wish you had made it with us," I said quietly, not looking into my Pokemon's eyes. What would I see there? Disappointment, sorrow?

Maybe I was just afraid I'd see blame.

I blamed myself, deep inside – but I didn't want to face the guilt of Grigori's death.

Instead, I charged ahead, ready for Pewter City – ready to take on Brock with my remaining team.

But the carefree shine was taken off of my journey.

Doubt was clouding my mind - and it would cost me again.

* * *

**Current Team:**

Charmander: "Kashen" - Male, Level 14

Rattata: "Tobias" - Male, Level 14

- R.I.P "Grigori" the Caterpie: 4-5


	5. I'm Bleeding Me

**Locke and Key:** _A Nuzlocke Story_

* * *

"This thorn in my side,  
This thorn in my side is from the tree,  
This thorn in my side is from the tree I planted.  
And it tears me, and I bleed, yeah.  
Caught under wheel's roll,  
I take the leech, I'm bleeding me.  
Can't stop to save my soul;  
I take the leash that's leading me.  
I'm bleeding me; oh, I can't take it."  
-Metallica, "Bleeding Me"; _Load._

* * *

Sitting around a fire Kashen made with his Ember, I stared into the flames, mesmerized by their golden dance, hypnotic, hot, destructive. I was seeing the fire, and yet I was seeing something _in_ the fire – hindsight, perhaps, seeing the trainers who had camped here before. Trainers with Bulbasaur, Squirtle, Charmander; trainers with Nidoran, Rattata, Mankey, Pidgey, Kakuna and Metapod; trainers with hopes, dreams, aspirations for the league; trainers with failure, disappointment, and deaths on their hands.

I was seeing myself, too. Unlike water, where your reflection is on the surface, the fire revealed to me not my face, but my soul – the black lurking in my pupils, surrounded by acid green, demons writhing in my heart, chewing at my brain, ruining my confidence.

I was seeing myself as I thought I was – a monster. Sacrificing an innocent Caterpie for my own victory and dreams, even to this day – after all that's happened, that is – I sometimes still look into the mirror and see not a cigarette-smoking, trash-talking cowgirl, but a lonely girl corrupted by demons, a marionette of evil.

Understand this: I had not _lost_ a friend; I had _destroyed_ a friend, and for that, I would never forgive myself.

Beside me, Tobias stirred in his sleep, and I glanced his way, wondering if he blamed me for the loss of our team member. His dreams seemed peaceful, solitary. He wasn't very attached to me, I don't think; he seemed to stand alone in every battle we fought. I sensed a little of myself in him; he didn't like to rely on others too much.

On the other side of me, Kashen slept soundlessly, curled up in a ball like a cat, with his tail clutched in one clawed paw. Kashen, my most reliable companion, didn't stir once. Were a Pokemon's dreams so silent, so undoubting? While my teammates slept through every night in mute harmony, I struggled to battle nightmares that stole my happiness like a Grass type steals energy with Absorb.

I wasn't jealous, though.

Sometimes we get what we deserve.

Stretching, I tore my eyes from the fire, lying between my Charmander and my Rattata.

Pewter City lie just ahead, and I had a battle to win.

* * *

"Well, guys, this is it," I said, staring at the entrance of the gym. It loomed over me, impressive, with shining windows and sleek, polished sidewalks before it. It was by far the most intimidating building I'd ever gone into, minus the time my boyfriend and I had gone into the abandoned house to smoke weed.

…That was pretty scary.

But this time was different. It was a different fear, a different impression.

Trainers had lost everything at this gym. I remembered the stories I'd heard from kids at school – those who left to become trainers, made it to Pewter City, and then lost their Pokemon, their confidence, and their inspiration to Brock.

Some of those trainers had chosen Bulbasaur and Squirtle – so what chance did I have, a stupid girl with a Normal type and a Fire type?

As if sensing my thoughts, Kashen touched me wrist – and his claws shone as he did.

"Metal Claw. It's our only hope," I sighed to my Charmander. "Are you ready for this, Kashen?"

"Char, charmander," he agreed.

With trepidation, I walked through those doors, and I forbade myself to walk out.

* * *

Inside, the room was dimly lit. A referee stood near the back, and next to him was the gym leader – darkly tanned, with small eyes and darker hair, Brock, the Rock type trainer, stood with his arms crossed, surveying me.

I was about to approach him, when another trainer stopped me.

"Hah. You're light years from facing Brock," he jabbed, holding a Poke Ball.

"And you're target practice. Go, Kashen," I said to my Charmander. He stepped forward, his claws wicked-looking.

"Geodude, go!"

It was on.

Kashen used Ember on the Geodude first, and it was badly burned. Perfect. I ordered him to Metal Claw it, but soon I discovered a horrifying thing: Ember hurt the Rock Pokemon _more_ than Metal Claw, despite the type disadvantage.

I swallowed, then ordered, "Okay, Kashen. I know this is a risk, but let's stick with Ember."

He nodded, and I was staggered by what I saw in his eyes: trust.

No… it was a mistake to trust me.

_Don't let me fool you, Kashen,_ I thought, misery in my eyes. _I'm a mental wreck._

Jeez, I needed a cigarette.

"Kashen, Ember again!"

His jaws parted and a bullet of flame shot out, hitting the Geodude in the face. The Rock type went down, stamina exhausted. His trainer called him back in a tired red beam of light, then sent out something that sort of surprised me: a small, round-headed mole, large nose, button black eyes. A Diglett – not even a Rock type, but a Ground.

Thoughtfully, I took out Kashen's Poke Ball. "Return!" Surprised, he glanced back at me as he was sucked into the Ball.

"Go, Tobias!"

The Poke Ball released my Rattata, who looked ready to destroy the Diglett without breaking a sweat.

"Diglett, Scratch!" The trainer called; the little mole sped up to me, whirled around, and somehow cut my Pokemon.

Unfazed, Tobias stood his ground.

"Quick Attack, and then finish it with Hyper Fang!"

Speeding around the Diglett in an attempt to catch it off guard, Tobias rammed it while it was faced the other way, and it was dazed by the blow. I could tell it was getting weaker, so when Tobias's teeth glowed a dull white and latched onto the Diglett's nose, I knew it was over.

The battle ended, and the trainer scooped up his injured Diglett, carrying it away.

"Guys… I'm gonna need a smoke before we fight Brock," I told Tobias, who looked mildly disgusted.

* * *

Outside, the air was warm, the sun falling on the city and making it glow softly. It was already fairly late. I watched the smoke curl into the air, fading into the sunset-colored sky, and Tobias said, "Rarat."

Not understanding, I turned to him with a slight glare. "What?"

"Rata, rattata," he sniffed.

"Condescending bitch. I can smoke if I want. I don't need more than one mother," I said bitterly. Which only served to remind me…

"Oh, shit. I still need to call her. If we can beat Brock… then we'll call her."

"Rata?" Questioned Tobias – he still looked disgusted with my cigarette, but he was at least looking me in the eye now.

"You mean… what if we don't beat him? Well, gee, aren't you a glass half full?" I laughed shakily and flicked ash onto the ground; deftly, Tobias sidestepped it.

"Well… I guess she'll find out one way or the other, won't she?"

Tobias seemed to smirk, but I won't say anything for sure. All I know is that he watched my finish my cigarette – I only had three left – and crush the remnants into the concrete sidewalk, leaving a black smear. I hope Brock's custodian appreciated it. I didn't really give a fuck.

"Okay, Tobias. You know I'm not going to send you out unless something very bad happens to Kashen." My voice was grave, and he nodded with an equally somber look on his white-whiskered face.

"Rata," he sighed.

"I know." I unclipped his Poke Ball and returned him, watching his anxious face disappear in a beam of red light.

_Jeez, I can't fail. I just can't._

_Anyway, if Green can fucking beat this gym, I definitely can._

* * *

When I stepped into the gym again, Brock and his bored-looking referee were the only others in the building.

Sighing, I stepped up to the other side of the arena, startled by the organized look of the battlefield. There were clear white lines that indicated "out of bounds", which meant if your Pokemon flew over those lines, they were considered "fainted". The boxes were small and confining; if a trainer crossed their box to go onto the battlefield, they were immediately disqualified.

All in all, it was very intimidating.

Biting my lower lip, I planted my feet firmly on the ground, my head clear and the taste of smoke and nicotine still dwelling in my throat.

"The second challenger in one day?" Brock mused, a smile on his face. "Let me guess – you're from Pallet Town?"

I was slightly surprised. "Yeah. How'd you know?"

"Well… a very talented trainer came in here a few hours before you. I think his name was… Green? Yeah, he warned us that a 'faggot from Pallet Town' would be arriving soon." At this, Brock cocked an eyebrow. "If you'll excuse my language… might I imply that you are said faggot?"

"…Yeah." I fucking hate Green. "Can we get this over with?"

"Indeed." Brock's hand strayed to the two Poke Balls clipped to his belt. "Are you familiar with the league rules?"

"Yes."

"Then, challenger, as indicated, you may choose your Pokemon first."

I breathed in deeply.

"Go, Kashen!"

Emerging in brilliant white, Kashen stood firmly on the battle field, eyes burning. Did he feel nervous? I couldn't imagine my level-headed Charmander feeling nervous about anything, but his tail trembled slightly – I could see the flame flickering, like a candle facing an open window.

"I choose you, Geodude!"

Brock chose a Geodude, identical to the one we had beaten earlier today, but obviously stronger. It looked more intelligent, somehow, too – only proving that Pokemon are a species much like our own, in some ways. They aren't all the same.

Anyways.

"Kashen, use Metal Claw!"

Claws shining, Kashen rushed forward, quick and accurate – the hit was critical. The Geodude's stone hand clutched the welts in its face, and Brock made a disapproving noise.

"Geodude, use Tackle!"

…Tackle? I was killing you, dude. But whatever.

"Kashen, finish it off with Ember!"

Opening his mouth, flames snaked forth, writhing around the Geodude and driving him to the ground, where he finally blacked out. Brock returned his Pokemon, his hand picking another Poke Ball.

"Okay. Here, go, Onix!"

The ball opened, but what emerged was the single largest Pokemon I'd ever seen. Unraveling as the white light faded and revealed a stone snake that was… god… its head reached the ceiling of the cavernous building, its tail curling to avoid straying from the arena, its mouth wide and empty-looking, a black pit.

I started to tremble.

"My God," I said aloud, wishing I could hide my fears and doubts.

The Onix lunged for Kashen, its chin scraping the floor in its attempt to knock my Charmander from the arena.

Hah. Clever.

"Kashen, jump over him! Wherever you land, Metal Claw the fuck out of him!"

Nodding, Kashen jumped up, landing on the Onix's head. Using a shining white claw, he slashed mercilessly at Onix's crown and the back of its rocky neck. It roared in pain and rose up to the ceiling again.

Shit. Kashen was stuck slashing at the monster's head, and I could see fear in his eyes – even from here.

"Okay, Kashen, use Ember!"

Little flames spread over Onix's head, but he only shook Kashen off. I expected the worst when he landed – death, a broken limb – but he landed on his feet gracefully, like a cat, and used another Ember.

Onix was already weakened!

Then – "Onix, use Rock Tomb!"

Motherfucker.

Large stones dropped from the ceiling, circling Kashen, then dropping around him.

"Chaaar," cried my Pokemon, and my heart stung. I quickly brought out something I'd bought before coming in here – a Potion – using my cigarette money – and sprayed Kashen, sighing in relief when he rose to his feet again.

"Okay, Kashen. Metal Claw!"

Angry now, Kashen held his claws out, leaping for the Onix and dragging his nails along its throat. The Onix roared, but it was inevitably defeated. The heavy crash when it hit the ground was deafening, and Kashen had to jump out of the way to avoid getting smashed again.

Through the dust, Brock stared at me, astounded.

"You defeated my Pokemon with only a Charmander? You truly are skilled." He fished in his pocket, taking out a velvet case. Inside, nestled in black silk, was my first badge – the Boulderbadge.

"Thanks," I said, plucking it out and examining it, a smile on my face. "But it wasn't me who faced that 13 foot tall fucking monster. It was Kashen." I grinned at the Charmander at my side, who nodded, breathing heavily.

"Here," Brock said, bringing out a CD-looking thing. "This is Rock Tomb. I'm sure you'll put it to good use. It's a gift, from me, the gym leader."

"A gift? Hey, thanks." I examined it, remembering the powerful Rock move that almost took out Kashen, and tucked it away in my bag. "I'll see you around, Brock."

As I turned and began to walk out the door, relief flooding me, Brock called, "Hey… just for the record… I think you'll go farther than that Green guy."

I paused, smiled.

"Between me and you… so do I."

* * *

That night, while Kashen sat regaling Tobias with details of his battles with Geodude and Onix, I sat in the Pokemon Center, having called my mother. She was worried, but I could hear the distinct pride in her voice. I told her about Kashen, the level-headed and cool Charmander, and Tobias, the cynical and sarcastic fighting Rattata.

When I got to Grigori, I paused.

Then I kept my mouth shut.

"I'll keep rooting for you, Leaf," she told me, warmth in her voice. "Good luck."

"Thanks, Mom," I said, words tasting sallow.

I put the phone down, then looked down at Kashen and Tobias, who were engrossed in a conversation about something. Then I looked out at the window, seeing a sliver of white moon nestling in the dark sky.

"Well. Guess we're headed for Mt. Moon tomorrow, boys," I said, to no one in particular.

* * *

**Current Team:**

Charmander: "Kashen" - Male, Level 15

Rattata: "Tobias" - Male, Level 14

- R.I.P "Grigori" the Caterpie: 4-5


	6. Are We Havin' Fun Yet?

**Locke and Key:** _A Nuzlocke Story_

* * *

"And I've been wrong;  
I've been down into the bottom of every bottle;  
These five words in my head scream  
'Are we havin' fun yet?'  
-Nickelback, "How You Remind Me"; _Silver Side Up_

* * *

We departed from Pewter City early the next morning, just as the sun was warming the grey dawn of the sky. The dew on the grass was slick but warm against my bare ankles. I slung my bag over my shoulder and gazed beyond the city, into the next Route, where I saw no trees but a few people and Pokemon.

We headed into the route, myself leading; to my right was Kashen, whose face wore minimal expression, and Tobias, who was walking with his head high and his tail higher, like a proud tomcat. I looked at my meager team, realizing that I needed another Pokemon.

"Hopefully there's some tall grass in this route," I muttered.

"Rattata!" Tobias chimed in.

"Not that you guys aren't great, but a girl can't be a real trainer with two Pokemon." I brushed back some low grass, seeing a girl in a skirt shorter than mine, with a polo and a curled hairstyle.

Ugh. One of those weird schoolgirls. She noticed me staring and freaked out.

"Are you _looking_ at me?" She screeched.

I winced at her shrill voice. "Yeah. It's not like I was undressing you with my eyes, or anything, but yeah, I was looking at you."

"BATTLE ME!"

"…Okay then."

I nodded to Kashen, who rushed forward, claws already glinting with metallic sheen.

The schoolgirl – lass? – sent out a Pidgey, which Kashen annihilated in short order with a few Metal Claws.

So, what does she do?

Send out another Pidgey.

Of-fucking-course.

Instead of slicing it up like a Thanksgiving turkey, Kashen roasted it with his Ember attack, sending it squawking back to its mistress. She cried and cuddled her hurt Pidgey, and I was just about to ask for my prize money when I noticed something weird about Kashen.

He was _glowing_.

"Unbelievable," I murmured, a smile on my face as the glowing Charmander began to change shape – longer legs, arms, paws with long, wicked claws, a tail whose fire burned much bigger and brighter, and, finally, a head that was elongated in the back to indicate a young dragon's horn.

The glow faded; Kashen turned to me, his flesh crimson instead of pale orange.

"Charr," he said, his voice huskier and lower-pitched. As he spoke, a scrap of fire punctuated his new tough appearance, and he smiled, pleased.

"Motherfucker," I exclaimed, rushing to him. "Charmeleon! Wow! I can't believe it, Kashen! You're _way_ cooler."

"Meleon," he said, smirking.

Tobias huffed, looking jealous; he still had a few levels before he would evolve. However, Kashen didn't gloat; he only held a paw of sharp claws up to the sun, watching the sun gleam off of their white surface.

"I'm so happy for you, Kashen," I said gleefully. "But really, I'm happier for me."

Kashen looked as though he figured.

* * *

The three of us burned our way through the other trainers – two Bug Catchers, another Lass, and two Youngsters, both of which screamed at me for not wearing shorts. Kashen incinerated Bug types, while Tobias quickly bit down the offending Poison and Normal types.

My team and I paused, however, at the end of the route. There was a trainer standing amidst a large area of tall grass, talking to her Jigglypuff. I wasn't so much interested in the Lass and her sweet puff of pink than the grass she stood in.

"New friend," I said, winking at Kashen, who rolled his eyes.

"Let's head in there. Tobias, scout out our Pokemon."

Nodding, my reckless Rattata rushed into the grass, and a Spearow flew out of the grass, _krawing_ and flapping its small wings. The bird – red, brown and black, looked much more aggressive than a Pidgey, and I was pleased. A bird to annihilate Green's.

"Okay, Tobias, Quick Attack!" I yelled, not thinking.

Tobias rushed at the Spearow, throwing it backwards and taking all of it's energy away. It was gone.

I simmered briefly.

"MOTHERFUCKINGSERIOUSLY!" I screeched.

Tobias shrugged, while Kashen cringed at my cursing and shrieking.

"Meleon," he said, pointing to another patch of grass that was technically in a different route.

"Thank God. Kashen, _you_ go in there this time," I said hotly, glaring at Tobias, who smiled guiltily.

My Charmeleon walked into the patch of grass, and a Pidgey fluttered out, making soft cooing noises, unlike the harpy Spearow I'd had to give up.

"Well. This works, too." I nodded to Kashen. "Use Scratch."

Kashen used bare claws to take a slash at the Pidgey, but unfortunately for me, it was a critical hit, sending it reeling back into the grass where it came.

A muscle near my eye twitched.

"FUCKINGSHITWHATTHEHELL!"

Kashen touched a claw to his forehead in exasperation; Tobias snickered gleefully.

"Whatever. Who needs a fucking bird anyways." I stomped off, heading to the Pokemon Center that lie straight ahead.

* * *

"Hey," some guy said in the corner, a sly look on his face. _A drug dealer? I could use a little something,_ I thought, approaching him offhandedly.

"You a trainer?" He asked.

"Yeah."

"I got somethin' real nice for ya."

I narrowed my eyes. "Oh? How much?"

"500 Pokedollars. But, listen, if you buy it, you'll win for sure."

"What is it?" I was a little suspicious now.

"A _Magikarp,_" he said.

I just walked out the door.

* * *

"Okay. Mt. Moon. Here we go."

The three of us walked into the sprawling cave, which was really more like several mountains growing into each other to create a cavernous path. The darkness was stale, but you could see just fine. A few trainers lumbered about, either training or attempting to get out of the cave, and Pokemon rustled about.

Kashen led the way, the flame on his tail a sort of beacon for Tobias and I. I mean, after all, I didn't want to get lost.

"As soon as we get another Pokemon, we can fight all these trainers," I muttered to myself. Tobias paused beside me, sniffing the air.

"Rattata."

"Huh?"

Before I could say anything else, something dark and sleek swooped down to flutter senselessly against my face and head. Fighting the urge to scream in a high-pitched girly wail, I raised my hands and grabbed whatever it was, throwing it on the ground.

It immediately got up again – a Pokemon. With no eyes but a large fanged mouth, two long, thin limbs, and purple-lined wings, a blue bat-thing fluttered near us.

I was immediately enthralled.

It looked so _evil_.

"Tobias, Kashen, you guys step back. I'm catching this one on full health."

They both looked uncertain, but as I drew my hand into my bag and came out with a Poke Ball, I felt confident. It was a level 7 Zubat, after all; it wasn't going to put up a fight.

I threw it, and, not surprisingly, the Ball clicked shut after rolling around a bit.

"Hah. All mine." I knelt down, placing my hand over the warmth of the Ball. Kashen came up on the other side, putting a paw with newer, longer claws on it.

The ritual still felt right, and I smiled into his red, narrow face.

"I'm calling you Xander," I said to the Zubat in its Ball. "Xander the Zubat."

"Charr," agreed Kashen, liking the name, I guess.

"You have no say in it anyways, but thanks."

* * *

So, I was pretty happy with Xander at first. I chose him, admired his wicked teeth, his pretty wings, his delicate 'feet'.

But the enamor wore off pretty quick.

Do you know what Zubat knows upon capture? Leech Life – a weak Bug attack that worked similar to Absorb – and Astonish, a horribly weak Ghost move that sometimes caused the foe to flinch.

The other Pokemon in the cave – Clefairy, Paras, Geodude, and other Zubats – weren't hurt too much, although Xander did knock out a few Paras pretty quickly with Leech Life. I had a lot of _horribly stupid _training to do, which included releasing Xander, then immediately calling him out of battle to send Kashen or Tobias in.

It burned my pride, but I swallowed it with bitterness.

After some of that bullshit, Xander was caught up, though I wasn't too thrilled with his moves still. He hadn't learned anything useful through all those levels being grown, but I was hoping for Bite and Wing Attack before too long.

After grinding Xander's levels mercilessly, I decided it was time to fight some of the trainers in the cave. Those included a clueless Bug Catcher with a Caterpie and a Metapod, a few Hikers with various Geodude and Onix, two Lasses – one with Clefairy and one with an Oddish and a Bellsprout, and a few Supermaniacs/Nerds/Cosplayers/What the fuck ever. They whipped out a few Electric and Poison types, but nothing Kashen couldn't handle with his fire breath.

Eventually, I came to the conclusion that Kashen, Tobias, Xander and I were ready to proceed. We can upon a staircase that led down.

It was very dark _down_, wherever that was.

"Meleon," Kashen said uneasily.

"Yes, I am going down there. And guess what? So are you," I snapped, fed up with the damn cave.

"Charr!" Jeez, was he really scared? I felt some pity.

"Okay. Fine. You stay up here; Tobias, Xander and I will go down and see what's up."

Satisfied, Kashen stood above the ladder while me and the other two went down.

There wasn't much in the cavern below – a few broken rocks, an item or two, and… wait… who was that?

A man in a black suit – uniform? – stood, a whip in his left hand. The man was older than I, probably older than most of the trainers in this cave, and I got a little nervous. What was he doing?

He turned, hearing my footsteps in the echoing cavern.

"What? What's a kid doing down here?" He snarled.

"A kid? Anyways, who are you?" I fired back, surprised to see a big red "R" on his uniform's front. He smirked.

"We're Team Rocket… Pokemon gangsters."

Before I could laugh, he chose a Pokemon, and I began to fear the worst. I mean, if he was a "Pokemon gangster", he might have some pretty impressive—

"Raaa," crowed his Rattata, a lower level than Tobias.

"Let's fuck this weirdo's shit up, Xander," I told my Zubat, who squeaked in response and fluttered into the battle.

It was fairly quick; after Leech Life'ing the Rattata into submission, the Rocket sent in a Sandshrew, who was a little tougher because of his Defense.

"Okay, Tobias, you take over!" I commanded, my voice stern.

Tobias used Quick Attack, but it didn't appear to do much to the heartily scaled yellow rodent. It merely Scratched him, though I wasn't worried about damage.

"Tobias, take it down! Hyper Fang!"

After Tobias bared his teeth and tore into the Sandshrew's gritty hide, the battle ended, and the Rocket returned his Pokemon with a glare.

"Huh. A kid who knows how to fight. Can't be a good thing. I need to warn the others."

With that, he disappeared into the shadows – how the fuck?

Instead of chasing him, I blew air through my lips.

"Okay. Let's get back up there. Kashen's probably worried sick about us."

* * *

**Current Team:**

Charmeleon: "Kashen" - Male, Level 17

Rattata: "Tobias" - Male, Level 17

Zubat: "Xander" - Male, Level 7


	7. In the Key of Love and Hate

**Locke and Key:** _A Nuzlocke Story_

* * *

Okay, author's note. From now on, I'll be including a 'current team roster', as much for the reader's sake as for my own. I've lost a few Pokemon, gained several, changed my team up, and it'll just help remind any readers (and myself) of the current team.

The reason I say 'myself' is because I'm currently in Seafoam Islands with a much more advanced team, and although I wrote some stuff down while playing, I mostly am going from memory here. That includes levels and moves, as well as other trainer's Pokemon in the area, but I'm trying to be as accurate as possible.

Okay, author's note over.

* * *

"To really know someone is to have loved and hated him in turn."

- Marcel Jouhandeau

* * *

The first thing I noticed when I reached the end of the cave – the Rockets surely weren't serious about excavating fossils.

Very few grunts remained in the cave by the time I'd gotten to the end, but there was one with a Raticate who put up a fight.

The thing the Rocket sent out wasn't a real Raticate anymore, though. I'm not trying to tell you it was a cyborg, or some zombie-like clone the Rockets created to replace real Pokemon. I'm telling you the soul had gone out of it. Its small, dark eyes were just that – dark, hollow, tired. It bared its teeth at me, a horrifying sight, but its battle spirit had dissipated long ago.

I almost felt like it was unfair to defeat it – it wasn't a real Pokemon anymore. The Raticate was used up, burned out. Team Rocket had stolen its soul and used it for money to fund their hateful crimes against people and Pokemon.

I sent out Kashen, who hadn't gotten too much experience in Mt. Moon. My Charmeleon was tense, tail swinging to cause the heat in the small cave rise. The ugly Raticate launched itself at Kashen without any order from its trainer, and I struggled to maintain control over a furious Charmeleon myself.

What I saw sickened me. The Raticate wasn't fighting for its master; it wasn't carrying out orders for love, respect, or obedience. It was throwing itself around recklessly, wanting to kill and, maybe, be killed.

The ensuing battle was brutal for the physical reason, of course, but what I was truly sickened by was the Raticate's desire to kill... or die itself.

After a struggling, gory brawl that left Kashen panting and bleeding, while the carnage of his Raticate was laid open before him, the Rocket cursed me and snarled, "The boss will hear about this and _crush_ you, little bitch!"

"Jeez, what are you freaks, the mafia?" I snapped, tired of the whole thing, worried for my Charmeleon. "Can't you accept defeat? Get the _fuck_ out of this cave!"

"Oh, we're worse than any mafia," the Rocket sneered, kicking aside the blood-painted corpse of his Raticate. "And we aren't going to accept anything from some pretentious little slut in a short skirt who thinks she's a trainer!"

I gritted my teeth, fury building slowly like a volcano's magma build up inside. I would have erupted at this scum, but he only escaped into the darkness.

Unclenching my fists, I looked with some sadness down at the remains of his Pokemon. What kind of way was that to treat a partner in crime? Evil as Team Rocket appeared to be, Pokemon shouldn't ever be treated like this.

My pity faded, though. The Raticate wasn't suffering anymore; anyways, Kashen and I didn't truly kill it. It'd been dead long before this battle.

Gazing at the mess, Kashen touched my arm – and his claws, slick with blood, reminded me of his injuries.

"Kashen, buddy, can you walk?" I asked, worried. He tried to keep the straight, brave face he always wore, but I could tell his wounds were severe by the wince he gave as I touched his shoulder. Fear laced through me when I saw the pain clouding his face.

"Meleon," he muttered weakly.

"Okay… return." I pulled his Poke Ball out, heart hammering against my chest. I didn't have any more Potions; I'd used the last one on Xander during his level grinding.

"Oh, fuck. Kashen, I can't let you die," I told the empty air. "I _won't_."

"Hey… get away from my fossils!" Some little creep shouted at me from the dark. I turned, and – to my astonishment – beyond the bits of ancient bone the weirdo was crouched over, there was light. The end of the cave – which meant a _city_. A Pokemon Center. _Kashen would live._

"Shut the fuck up. I don't want your motherfucking fossils," I shrieked, but I could tell he was itching to fight.

"Go, Xander!"

"Go, Grimer!"

A pile of purple sludge with gradient colors emerged, oozing and smiling snidely. Xander Astonish'd it senselessly, me battling more ruthlessly than I should have. The poor thing probably had a concussion, but I was past caring.

Suddenly, my Zubat opened its mouth, wicked sharp teeth gleaming faintly.

"Bite? Thank God. Finish it off!" I cried, pointing deliberately. The Grimer stood no chance; Xander took a chunk of toxic sludge away from it, though it was impossible for Zubat to be poisoned.

"Return, Grimer," sighed the other trainer. "Koffing, go!"

Xander had a tougher time with Koffing's higher defense – slightly spherical, Koffing was essentially a floating ball of toxic gas with an eternal smile on its face and a skull and cross bones beneath that blissful grin.

However, Bite was the victor to Koffing's Tackle, and my Pokemon and I proceeded with the Helix Fossil. I didn't give a shit. Fossils weren't my thing, really. I hadn't even gone into the museum in Pewter City. Know why? 'Cause I was one of those kids who would piss on the Alamo, that's why.

"We made it," I said softly, relishing the feel of open air on my face, rather than dusky, damp cave air with an overpowering scent of limestone and rust. The sky was dark, and the stars were faded over the city, where the lights were bright. I sighed shakily, carrying my Pokemon to the town.

* * *

It was nearly noon before I rose the next morning, camped outside – near Route Whatever. The one by Cerulean, a small, closed-off patch of grass near the city's entrance. I did finally rise, though, and called my three Pokemon out, ready to explore and possibly raise levels.

As I walked into the grass, Xander flying near my shoulder, Tobias and Kashen by my feet, a little growling noise was heard by all of us. The rustling grass parted to reveal a dusty, patchwork yellow desert mouse, eyes large and blue. It stared at us for a minute, then stepped forward, ready for battle.

"Huh. I like this guy." I gestured towards Tobias. "Come on. Your turn."

"Rata," Tobias exclaimed, jumping into the fray.

One Tail Whip and Tackle later, the Sandshrew was weakened sufficiently; it's low HP was evident by the heaving of its flanks. Tobias licked a paw idly while I threw my Poke Ball at the Ground type. Without any resistance, it clicked shut, and I smiled happily.

"Hah. _Yes!_"

Kashen came forward to lay his claws on the top of the Ball, and, biting my lip, I brightened and said, "Tradden. Your name is Tradden."

Kashen raised an eyebrow.

"Whatever. Saw it on a movie once."

* * *

My Pokemon and I were, thankfully, fully rested before I came upon an unpleasant surprise in Cerulean City.

Green Oak, of course, looking as handsome as ever with his goldish hair falling over his eyes – beautiful blue eyes – and his clothes fitting him expensively.

Behind him, a Pidgeotto trailed aerially - distant, yet obviously belonging to the Pallet Town quarterback, circling the air like a hawk about to dive for prey. I remembered the damn Pidgeotto, when it had been a chick, useless and weak. Now, well, it looked like it was a force to reckon with.

"Well, if it isn't Leaf." Green smirked. I smirked right back at him, full of the same fire I knew he was; but it was my fervent belief that mine was hotter and brighter.

"Hey, I appreciated you letting Brock know a real trainer was going to whoop his ass." My tone was arrogant.

"Tch. Just my civil duty, darlin'."

Manwhore.

"We gonna battle, or what?" I said, impatient.

"Right. Ready to lose?" With that, he smiled and pointed to me, and the Pidgeotto flew down, landing before its trainer with a cold look in its black-masked eyes.

Unlike Pidgey, who was short, plump, and brown and white, Pidgeotto were taller, leaner, with light tawny coloring, and the mane of hair the species wore was longer – neck-length – and a strawberry-red color. Its wings were powerful, and it was probably faster than all of my Pokemon.

Despite my hatred for Pidgey, I could feel my metaphorical mouth watering.

"Go, Tobias!"

My Rattata emerged, teeth bared viciously against the Pidgeotto, and I recalled that the two had battled before, on Route 2 – or was it 3? Eh. Whatever. I remembered that Pidgey and Rattata lived in harmony most of the time, but I was secretly happy to see my Pokemon making rivals out of Green's.

"Sand-Attack, Pidgeotto!" Green called, and the bird used sharp talons to kick dirt into Tobias' face. Sneezing, my Rattata hissed (I guess that's what you'd call that displeased noise?) and braced itself for battle.

"Quick Attack, Tobias."

"Counter it with your own Quick Attack, Pidgeotto!"

While my Rattata rushed forward, small white feet a blur, Pidgeotto spread its pretty tawny wings, rushing forward, the wind slightly ruffling the feathers.

Okay. I have an infatuation with strong bird Pokemon. I don't know why, but Flying types have always been my absolute favorite.

As Pidgeotto and Tobias hit each other head on, I suspected severe damage on both parts, but was pleased to see that they'd missed each other entirely. Tobias was still scratching sand out of his eyes, and Green's bird had just barely missed.

"Pidgeotto, Quick Attack!" Green called, firmer.

"Tobias, evade the attack and use Hyper Fang!"

As the Flying type swooped low, forming a torpedo-like formation to dive at Tobias, he duck-and-rolled, barely having time to chomp down on his wing tips.

In instant pain, Pidgeotto shrieked, and was dragged to the ground by Tobias' ruthless fangs. I could tell Tobias was exhausted, too, so I called him back, though he was far from defeated.

One down. Three to go.

Green gnashed his teeth and recalled Pidgeotto – his obvious favorite.

"Go, Squirtle!"

I withdrew Tobias and sent out Kashen, who looked grateful – as soon as he and Squirtle met eyes, their bodies tensed in a fashion similar to mine and Green's postures when he locked eyes. It kind of warmed my heart to see it.

"Squirtle, use Withdraw, then Water Gun!"

"Kashen, counter Withdraw with Leer, then dodge the Water Gun!"

My move worked; Squirtle's raised defense move was canceled out, and the water move missed Kashen.

"Kashen, Mega Punch!" Smirking, my Charmeleon drew back his fist, which glowed with physical power. I'm sure Green wondered where I'd gotten the move, but I wasn't about to clarify anything. Scratch had lost its purpose, and a kindly move tutor helped me out with that dilemma.

Squirtle flew backwards, weakened from the punch.

Kashen's mouth was bursting with flame when I looked again, and I got a bit worried. I hadn't ordered him to use Ember on Squirtle; why would I? Kashen had more effective attacks. And he _never_ took the initiative; he'd always been observant and attentive to my orders.

Why was he so violent suddenly? Fire Pokemon were always a little wild, but Kashen – the Kashen _I_ knew – was quiet, obedient, tough.

"Kashen, finish Squirtle with Metal Claw," I commanded, testing him. The flames in his mouth slowly disappeared, but I could see reluctance in the action. Instead, his claws shimmering, he swiped at Squirtle, who was finished for the match.

"Should'a let 'im evolve, Green. He'd be a better match for Kashen as a Wartortle," I chortled mockingly.

Green shrugged.

"I have plans for him. Anyways, Rattata, go!"

Ignoring Green's ominous words, I withdrew Kashen and sent out Xander.

"Zuzubat," he screamed wildly, flitting in the air like an idiot.

Green raised an eyebrow, but surprisingly, the little bitch kept his mouth shut.

"Rattata, Focus Energy!"

"Xander, Supersonic!"

Xander's confusing rays missed Rattata, who was 'pumped' for critical hits – my worst enemy. God, how I hate critical hits - that is, if they're on the opposing side.

"Whatever. Xander, Bite him until he faints."

Diving wildly, Xander took a few chomps of the Rattata, who struggled briefly in his attempt to Tackle and Quick Attack my slightly-crazed Poison type. His teeth buried themselves in Rattata's tail, and the rodent fainted, exhausted by Zubat's energy.

"Go, Abra!" Green was irritated now, I could tell.

"Tradden."

The Poke Ball revealed my Sandshrew, who was still fairly weak, but whom I had taught a strong attack.

"Rock Tomb, Tradden!"

"…Teleport."

Abra went nowhere, and after a few rounds of Rock Tomb, Tradden managed to defeat the narrow-eyed fox-like Psychic type. It sat, obliviously sleeping (maybe?), while Tradden threw heavy stones at it left and right.

"Okay. Fine. You win, Leaf." He sounded unhappy, but not entirely so. "Maybe next time I see you, you won't _suck_."

I blinked, then only laughed lightly.

"Yeah. Okay. See you, Green."

I watched him go, a smirk on my lips. Tradden noticed and pulled on my wrist.

"San san?" He seemed to inquire, tilting his head up towards mine.

"…Shut up. I hate that prick."

My words were true but hollow.

"Come on; there are trainers on the bridge, and I don't know about you pansies, but I'm ready for some hardcore grinding."

I'm pretty sure I was the only one, but despite groans amid my team, we stepped onto the bridge, unaware of the vault of surprises – bad, worse, and some good – that awaited us.

* * *

**Current Team:**

Charmeleon: "Kashen" – Male, Level 20

Rattata: "Tobias" – Male, Level 19

Zubat: "Xander" – Male, Level 19

Sandshrew: "Tradden" – Male, Level 10

- R.I.P "Grigori" the Caterpie: 4-5


	8. It's Ours Now to Steal

**Locke and Key:** _A Nuzlocke Story_

A/N: Thanks for the reviews! (: Although I don't write for reviews, it still makes my day to see them!

* * *

"And I know you hear their voices  
(Calling from above)  
And I know they may seem real  
(These signals of love)  
But our life's made up of choices  
(Some without appeal)  
They took for granted your soul  
And it's ours now to steal."

-Avenged Sevenfold, "Nightmare"; _Nightmare_

* * *

My feet felt like they sank in slightly. The bridge, directly under a mineral-rich stream – the near-perfect water that Cerulean City was known for – was soggy and weak beneath my heavy Running Shoes. I worried briefly that we were all going to fall into the river, but there were five other trainers on this bridge, all of them with Pokemon…

I took my chances. Approaching the first boy – a Bug Catcher, I could tell, by the net slung over one shoulder and the ridiculous-looking straw hat – I called, "What the hell's goin' on here? You all having a party I should know about?"

He smirked. "This is Nugget Bridge. If you defeat all five of us—" he gestured towards the rest of the trainers on the overcrowded little bridge, "—then you'll get a _fabulous_ prize!"

I twitched.

"It's not a Magikarp, is it?"

"Nope," the Bug Catcher laughed. "Do you accept the challenge?"

I shrugged. "Yeah, I guess I'll have to."

I could have sworn there was a glint in his eye when he took a Poke Ball from his belt - a glint that seemed familiar, yet foreign at the same time. It worried me a little, but I wasn't going to lose to some Bug Catcher.

The trainer sent out a Caterpie, and as its cute face stared up into mine, my heart panged briefly - Grigori... Brushing thoughts of my fallen Pokemon away, I picked my own Poke Ball from my belt. My weakest, Tradden - the one that needed the most training.

I guess I should pay attention to "signs" more often; don't you think sometimes they really are there for a purpose?

"Tradden, go!"

My Sandshrew leapt out of the ball. As he landed on the bridge, it made a creaking noise beneath him, which I was a little uncertain about. Did these trainers not fucking realize that the damp wooden structure they were standing on wasn't as reliable as they might have thought? This bridge had been here since Misty was a child, and it wasn't always Nugget Bridge, I was sure. Anyways.

"Tradden, Rock Tomb!"

Tradden ran forward, pounding the bridge to cause rocks to fly at the Caterpie. It was entombed by the stones, and Tradden had a victory in his grasp.

"Caterpie!" Wailed the Bug Catcher as Rock Tomb crushed the insect flat. I felt bad, briefly, but it passed. He _had_ challenged me, technically!

"Weedle, take that thing out!" He commanded. The Bug type – similar to Caterpie, but with a wicked-looking needle with venom powers upon its head – made some sort of distorted mewling noise upon its release.

I hate Weedle. I hate Kakuna. And I especially fucking hate Beedrill. So when I saw the little bastard, with his beady black eyes and enormous purple nose, I had an insane lust to see it torn in three pieces.

"Tradden, get it! Scratch attack!"

Nodding gleefully, Tradden bound over to it, first Scratching it and taking a chunk of health away, then using Rock Tomb. The Weedle took the claw swipe, but it dodged the Rock Tomb, using its point to jab Tradden in the stomach.

"Shreeww," Tradden growled; poisoned.

My fucking luck.

"Tradden, use Scratch!"

In a weakened state, Tradden swiped at the Weedle, knocking it out effectively this time.

"Ugh. I'll just spritz you with Antidote before we fight the next trainer, okay?" I spoke to Tradden, whose skin felt loose and dusty beneath my soothing fingers. He nodded, looking determined.

"Alright. Let's go."

Digging in my pack, I found the Antidote, and I sprayed him lightly with it. He twitched at the sting, but otherwise took it like a man as it healed the venom in his skin.

The Lass – my absolute _favorite_ type of trainer – chose a small, docile-looking blue Pokemon, not exactly mammalian or reptilian. It's horn was small, but it contained poison. The claws and teeth on it were more fearsome, however.

"Nidoran," shrilled the Lass, "Use Scratch!"

"Tradden, Rock Tomb!"

Sandshrew pounded stones into the female Nidoran; it let out a sharp bark of pain, but retaliated by allowing its horn to tear Tradden's flesh. The venom bubbled into his blood – fucking poisoned again.

It's Poison Point ability was only it's revenge; the female Nidoran lie down, exhausted.

"Go, Nidoran!" The lass said again. Similar to the previous opponent, this Pokemon was neither mammalian nor reptilian, but its ears were larger, its color soft pink, its teeth and claws less dangerous-looking. The most significant difference was its larger size and the sharp elongation of it's horn. The male Nidoran was significantly better than the female, in my opinion, and I'd always kind of wanted one for its evolutions Nidorino and Nidoking.

Sighing with slight lust, I ordered Tradden to use Rock Tomb – and I didn't realize my mistake until it was too late.

Nidoran Male dodged the Rock Tomb attack, then reared up and used Double Kick on Tradden. He staggered backwards, holding his flanks, and I was relieved at first to see he wasn't quite a goner. That was, until he randomly spasmed, clutching his aching chest and then shuddering, feverish.

Poisoned, from that damned Nidoran Female.

"Tradden, no!" I cried, rushing forward to catch him just before he fell to the ground.

"Shrew," he muttered, before he spasmed again – and it drained the last of his vitality, leaving him empty and broken in my arms.

I sat there for a moment, my dead Sandshrew in my arms, my pride bruised and my confidence fractured – again. Goddamnit, why hadn't I remembered that Tradden was poisoned?

I held the cold corpse of my Ground type to my chest as I released a replacement Pokemon from my Poke Balls – one that would avenge the death of a new friend we had barely gotten to know.

"Tobias, use Hyper Fang!" I shrilled, and, seeing the mound of yellow dust in my arms, his eyes clouded with rage. My Rattata, in a frenzy, charged the Nidoran Male, tearing into his long ear and leaving him in screaming ruins for the lass to worry about.

"I'm so sorry, Tradden," I murmured glassily - I sounded devoid of sorrow, but truthfully, I was holding back a sob. This happened to me again - all because I had to take chances.

I was so used to taking risks in my normal life that I did it with my Pokemon.

The realization, my knees damp and hurting from digging into the old wood of the bridge, sent a chill down my spine.

To my slight surprise, the solitary Tobias approached me, touching his nose to Tradden's dead, sandy skin, then to my own arm. I welcomed his sign of sympathy, his icon of comfort - but I was surprised when he glowed white and began to expand before me.

"T-Tobias…?" I muttered, my despair eclipsed by joy as the white illumination faded and I was facing my new Raticate, taller, rounder, with fleshy webbed toes and paws, a long, furless tail, tawny fur and long, brittle whiskers. The biggest difference was in his eyes, though – Rattata, cute enough for the Lasses, had nothing on Raticate. His eyes were wide, frenzied, and his teeth were no longer hidden by a white maw, but instead showcased his weapons – a display of destructive fangs.

My mind flashed back to the only other Raticate I'd ever seen in person – the one belonging to that Rocket Grunt, the one that had torn into Kashen with religious gusto, the one with the shell of a body and the soulless eyes, the one with a death wish. The one who bled to death in a dark cave while its master vanished into the shadows. The one who had been a living corpse in a Poke Ball for God knows how long.

I released Tradden's body, setting him gently on the ground, while Tobias approached me, sniffing me as though he had forgotten my place in his life – or was he questioning my role? He looked at Tradden's dead form, then back at my open arms, and, after deliberation, my solitary Raticate ran into my arms, allowing me to hug him deeply.

It wouldn't happen again, but it was enough. The trust of my Pokemon, it was enough to keep me going until the end.

"You'll never end up like that Raticate I saw die in Mt. Moon, Tobias," I said aloud, my vows searing the air like razor blades thrown by adroit flicks of the wrist. "I promise, you and I – we'll both go down with fire in our eyes."

"Caate," he snapped, and we looked at each other with a touch of fondness.

That was a promise I did keep – even if it was the hardest promise I'd ever had to face.

* * *

My team and I went back to the grassy route where I'd caught Tradden, and found a patch of soft, loose dirt.

Kashen stepped forward, taking claw after claw of dirt out of the ground; Tobias reluctantly assisted him, while Xander nudged Tradden's body into the hole in the ground.

The grave was made, and on it I rested Tradden's now-empty Poke Ball.

"It was my fault you died, Tradden," I said, my voice cold as any wind that could shake Kanto, "But we're not going to stop here. We're going to keep going, and we're doing it – in part – for you, too."

I bowed my head out of respect, and Kashen opened his mouth, puffing fire. "Chaarrr," he agreed.

"Raticaaate."

"Zuzuzu."

With that, we departed, back to Nugget Bridge, where I would fight for two things. Only one of them was Tradden's death.

* * *

The weak trainers – youngsters, lasses, Bug Catchers – I bulldozed my way through them, my strong Pokemon taking the lead now that I had no weaklings to grind.

The last of them – a boy with a high-leveled Mankey who was just pummeled into exhaustion by Xander, my quirky Zubat, was staring tearfully at his beaten Fighting type.

I passed him, but I was grabbed by the arm by a guy who stood at the end of the bridge. I tried to shake him off, but I couldn't. Panic setting in, I turned to command Xander for help, but the man said,

"Congratulations! You win a fabulous prize!" He handed me a chunk of gold.

A Nugget. Oh man. How did I not guess that… the single most useless item on the games.

Well, except for those Bitter Potions I'd heard about in another region - Johto, I think. Come on. Why give a Pokemon something that'll taste like shit and make them hate you, when you can buy Potions or pick Berries?

Anyways.

"Now… you managed to defeat all of those young grunts-in-training." What? I remembered the ruthless Lass with her murderous Nidoran, the Bug Catcher with the glint in his eyes, and I turned to look this man, locking our gazes - my green a burning acid, eating away at this man's disguise to reveal a skeleton kept in darkness.

Beneath his kind facade, the eyes of a killer gleamed back at me.

"I'll bet you could be a top leader in Team Rocket," he cajoled, and his eyes met mine again - mocking me.

Motherfucker.

I tore his arm off mine, grabbing him by his shirt and pulling him close to me. His breath was sharp, precise mint on my face, and I hope mine was worse than the breath of any dragon.

"You're with Team Rocket, huh? You like being in a group that kills Pokemon and steals from people? How fucking dare you ask me to join you." Memories of broken Pokemon flooded my vision, and the death of my Sandshrew that those 'grunts-in-training' had killed. My fury mounted, but I swallowed it down, clenching the fist that wasn't clinging to his shirt.

I was going to kick him in the groin, but instead I gestured to my Zubat - a far greater weapon. "I suggest you get out of here before I kick your ass severely."

His eyes darted to my Zubat. It was visibly more trained than most Zubats the trainers had around here; its wings flapped heartily, its teeth had a powerful bite and clamp, and, hell, he was pretty big; he was almost ready for evolution.

"Fine," the Rocket bit out. "I'll go… but I'd advise you to steer clear of Team Rocket's affairs."

"I'd advise you to get out of my sight before I order Xander here to rip your criminal throat out," I growled back at him, twice as fierce. "I should anyways."

The Rocket stared at me, then moved his eyes to the Zubat.

"Why don't we battle for it?" He asked, smiling. "If you win, I'll leave. If I win, you either join Team Rocket, or you give me your Pokemon."

_Like _hell_ that's gonna happen,_ I thought, but I stared him down.

"Fine."

The Rocket laughed gleefully, then sent out a Pokemon - long, limber, purple and limbless, the viper Ekans stared at me with round golden eyes.

"Xander, go! Use Bite!"

"Zuzubat," he called out - a battle cry, I guess - and he dove down, ramming his teeth into the Ekans' poisonous skin. It hissed in pain and attempted to Wrap itself around Xander. He tried to fly out of its coil, but was effectively trapped.

"Shit. Xander, Bite it before it zaps anymore health," I called, and, sure enough, Xander's Bite was enough to drive the Ekans away from him; it dropped like a dead fly in Hoenn heat.

I'm pretty sure the Rocket had another Pokemon, but I can't remember fighting it. I remember him leaving, but my rage had blinded me; all I could think about was Team Rocket abusing Pokemon, using them for criminal activity, and then stealing them from other trainers - trainers who might actually love their pets and partners.

Before I knew it, Xander was back in my Poke Ball and the battle was over. The Rocket had run off, true to his word.

When I realized he was gone, I turned back to the beaten trainers on the bridge. Young, hopeful. My stomach turned at the thought of them being ruined by Team Rocket - and worse, ruining their Pokemon in turn.

"You little _punks_. You really want to waste your life and the lives of your Pokemon? Team Rocket will change you in ways you will never be able to comprehend," I snarled. "And if you _do_ become Rockets..."

Kashen spit fire, Tobias showed fang, and Xander screeched. Pretty much just punctuated my violent badassness.

"...I will take you _all_ down, one by one."

"We'll be stronger, too, you know," said one boy - a youngster with an Ekans and a Zubat, I remember.

I smirked.

"You'll be no match for me. Sell your soul for crime, boys and girls, and we'll see who makes it to the top."

With that, I turned to go, my pride waving like a brilliant war flag.

There was another patch of grass I meant to explore before I went to Bill's house.

I wasn't ready to replace Tradden, but the team couldn't stay at three forever - and by now, I knew anything could happen to even them.

With Team Rocket around, I had to be ready.

* * *

**Current Team:**

Charmeleon: "Kashen" - Male, Level 22

Raticate: "Tobias" - Male, Level 22

Zubat: "Xander" - Male, Level 20

- R.I.P "Grigori" the Caterpie: 4-5

- R.I.P "Tradden" the Sandshrew: 8-10


	9. I've Failed You

**Locke and Key:**_ A Nuzlocke Story_

A/N: Huh. Longest chapter yet. I liked this one the best, so far, I think. (:

* * *

"No, there's nothing you say that'll salvage the lie  
But I'm trying to keep my intentions disguised.  
And now I'm deprived of my conscience; something's got to give.  
Deprived of my conscience; this all belongs to me.  
I'm beaten down again;  
I belong to them.  
Beaten down again, I've failed you.  
I'm weaker now, my friend; I belong to them.  
Beaten down again, I've failed you."  
-Seether, "Truth"; _Karma & Effect_

* * *

"Whoever told you this was a good idea should be shot," I sighed as I went over to Bill's computer. There was a muffled protest inside one of the transportation containers, but otherwise silence as I pushed the button to separate him from the Pokemon.

Who'd wanna be a fucking Pokemon anyways? Sure, they have powers, but they're completely at the mercy of our larger, more advanced, and more dominating world. Pokemon were sometimes used cruelly in battles, sometimes even in illegal battles to the death, and we constantly destroyed their habitats to build onto our cities. Bill was either naïve or crazy to have wanted to be one – especially a Clefairy. The _hell_.

The smoke cleared, and out of one box stepped Bill – his hair, long and messy, was pulled back into a ponytail. He was wearing tie-dye and had several Poke Balls clipped to his belt.

The other container released a Clefairy – Bill's Clefairy, presumably. The little pink fluffball looked scarred for life, a like a child who walked in on his parents doing something private. My heart went out to the little thing, honestly.

"Thanks so much," Bill said in a lazy voice. I wondered briefly if he was stoned, but I couldn't smell anything. "Did I ever get your name?"

"No. When would you have asked for it? I walked in and you were… yeah. I'm Leaf."

"Leaf. Great. Well, Leaf, I have to thank you somehow, and I think as a trainer, you'd appreciate this." He fumbled in one pocket and came up with a shiny laminated ticket. I raised an eyebrow. Hopefully it wasn't a ticket to a Grateful Dead concert.

"Here. This is for the S. S. Anne."

"The _what_?"

The S. S. Anne was an expensive cruise ship that went around the world – to all five regions! It always stopped in Vermilion City, then cruised by Johto, Sinnoh, Unova and finally Hoenn, where it stayed awhile in the warmest, most tropical region of all.

I still wasn't sure I'd heard him right, but when he smiled lazily, I knew I'd guessed correctly.

"They invited me because I'm, well, Bill, but I'm not exactly…" he paused. "They're _kind_. They don't realize that 'cause, well, they think 'rich inventor' and see me as what they'd like."

"Uh. No offense or anything, but you think _I'm _they're kind? I've never owned a dress or heels in my life, and the only money I've ever had is what's in my pocket now," I said honestly.

"Maybe I'm not inviting you to mingle with the rich and powerful, Leaf," he said, and there seemed to be a hidden meaning in his cryptic words. If I wasn't so dumb and backwards, maybe I'd have been able to figure it out, but at the time I didn't even try.

"Well, shit. I'm not gonna _not_ take a free ticket to a cruise ship."

So, that's how I walked down the Cerulean Cape, stuffing a glossy, expensive ticket into my pack.

It'd been one day exactly, now, since the death of Tradden and the defeat of "Nugget" Bridge. I'd gone right into the tall grass, knowing I had to replace the hole that Tradden's defeat had left in my team. Lucky call – I'd walked out with an Abra, male, level 10, which I'd called Yenra.

My Pokemon didn't like Yenra. I wasn't sure why, but Kashen especially treated him badly – I'd almost call it a bully-nerd relationship, in which Kashen stole Yenra's food, pushed him around, and just generally treated him like shit. It pissed me off, but I figured it'd wear off. After all, the other Pokemon weren't too nice either – Xander completely ignored him, while Tobias ignored everybody, as usual. That solitary warrior shit didn't fly with me when it came to Yenra, though.

As I walked down the cape, looking out over the clear blue waters, I decided to let my team loose for a moment. There were no more trainers up here to fight, and I was feeling better than I had all day.

I threw all of my Balls into the air, and as they split open and unleashed my party in flashes of white light, I admired them all. Color and shape flooded into their forms.

Kashen looked at me as I stood there, and his eyes looked dark. As if he were thinking morbid thoughts, maybe.

"Meleon," he said irately.

"What's your deal?"

"Charr."

He said no more, only turned his back to watch the other Pokemon play. Yenra sat calmly, quietly, seeming to observe the others as he lay back with tightly shut eyes. The sunlight streamed over his small, golden-brown vulpine body, but he didn't bask in it like most Pokemon; he only absorbed the rays calmly, seeming to take the world in stride.

Xander flitted over Tobias, who bounced up to catch him; both of them were enjoying the sunlight and the company of the other, but I sensed distress between all of them – even my new Abra.

I wanted to ask them what was wrong, but obviously, that'd be pointless.

Instead, I waited fifteen minutes and returned them all – except Kashen.

I wanted him to walk with me.

There was silence between us as we took the long, winding trail back to Cerulean City. He seemed deep in thought – can Pokemon even _be_ deep in thought? – but I didn't disturb him. His tail flame seemed to catch the entire sky on fire as we walked on – the blue of the sky filled with red, as if a wound were cut into it and the heat of the blood was spreading. The air was cool for a summer day, and I still felt alive – more so than I had in days.

But Kashen didn't share my good mood. If anything, his attitude proved antagonistic.

"Kashen… what's the matter with you?" I finally asked, a little absent. It wasn't as if I expected a reply.

But when I looked into his eyes – blue as the sky had been at the Cape – I could see something there that I hadn't ever seen in my Pokemon's eyes before. I had seen it many, many times in my life, though – in the eyes of my teachers. In the eyes of the policewoman who had picked me up for drinking in the parking lot at the mart. In the eyes of my mother almost every day of my life.

It was disappointment.

_Failure._

I didn't think before my mouth opened, my thoughts crashing down from my brain like a train ready to wreck on a mountainside.

"You're fucking disappointed in _me_? What the fuck for? I couldn't pretend they were on the team forever, Kashen. I couldn't pretend like they weren't fucking dead. If I didn't move on, we'd all be stuck in place," I snapped, my instincts riled – the defensive instincts I'd used on others since I was ten.

"Charr," he scoffed, spitting fire at the ground. It was a universal "fuck you" gesture, and it pissed me off to no end.

"You think they're replacements? Xander for Grigori, Yenra for Tradden?" I was digging for the truth.

We'd stopped walking now. The blood had drained, leaving a grey-black corpse behind, but a hint of fire was at the core of the horizon, giving the shadows a ruby edge. Kashen looked up at me, obviously angry.

"Charmeleon," he said, and when he said it, he nodded again.

"It's not fucking true." It was. In a way, it was. "Okay. Fine. Suppose they are replacements. So fucking what? Our team can't stay at three forever, Kashen. When someone dies – when someone gets lost – I can't just let their empty space vacuum the rest of us in," I snarled, sounding like a rabid animal. "I have to keep going. And goddamnit, so do you."

"Charr!" It was obvious: _I don't have to._

"Then motherfucking don't. Good riddance, you prick."

He looked as though he was tempted to run away from me, but he didn't. God save me, he stayed with me, and instead of running, of being free of a depressive, maniac trainer, fucked up in the head and in the heart,, he reached with one of his long-clawed paws to touch my fisted, trembling hand.

"Don't touch me," I screamed at him – I really am sorry for that – but he held on anyways, the warmth of his Fire type skin against mine a sort of comfort – and a reminder.

Tears gathered in my eyes – stormclouds waiting to burst – but I held my pain inside, and I shielded my eyes from Kashen.

"I'm not going to be a failure, Kashen," I said, staring into the red spot in the darkness - the last of the sun before nightfall. "I'm just not. I _can't_ be. Not anymore. Not ever again."

"Meleon," he responded, and his voice was softer. _You aren't_.

"And it's thanks to you that I'm not anymore."

Without another word, we started walking again, and as we did, the silence evaporated between us, leaving nothing but companionship.

* * *

"The fuck? That wouldn't happen to be the same Rocket… would it?" I thought aloud, peering into the shadows. There was a fenced-in house, and the cops were out front. I wasn't sure what I hated more, criminals or cops, but I decided to check it out myself.

I hopped the fence, a skill that came naturally, and stood, dusting myself off. The Rocket must have heard me, because he turned around, widening his eyes. As soon as I was visible to him, he shoved something into his pocket, and I smirked. Hah. Meth lab bust, maybe? Team Rocket didn't seem redneck enough, but who knew?

"Shit. You must be the bitch Barry warned me about," he muttered.

Hell. If he'd shave his five o' clock shadow and wear some normal clothes, this Rocket would be pretty hot. And, you know, if he wasn't a fucking scumbag.

"Oh, sounds like I'm famous," I bit back at him, feeling a smile twist my lips. I didn't feel it in my heart, though.

"Ugh. I don't have time for this." He glanced behind him, then sighed. "I have to get out of here. If I win, you cover for me."

"If _I_ win, you leave and give me whatever it is you have that the cops need," I said. I was really just curious. Anyways, it's not like some low-class Rocket grunt was going to beat me. My Pokemon were strong - higher than any I'd fought in the area - and I knew Rockets didn't train right.

He looked conflicted.

"…Fine. Let's go."

He took out a Poke Ball and unleashed something strong-looking, with gray-blue skin and big muscles. A Machop.

"Go, Yenra!" I called, unleashing my Abra. It sat docilely, unblinking.

"Abbbraaa," he seemed to purr.

"Machop, use Karate Chop!"

"Yenra, Secret Power!"

The earth shifted; Secret Power turned into Earthquake, it seemed, because the ground shook ruthlessly, rattling the Machop and then knocking him over.

However, he jumped back up, ran over, and whirled around, using Karate Chop on my Abra. The flattened sideways hand smacked against my Psychic type's skull; it seemed to rattle him. He fell over, shivering slightly.

It wasn't very effective, but it did quite a bit of damage to my Psychic type's low defense.

"Shit. Yenra, Secret Power again!"

But this time, the quaking patch of ground was avoided; the Machop leapt into the air, and then was ordered for a Seismic Toss.

I felt a cold sheet of sweat rise on my skin; I could only watch in horror as the Machop reached under Yenra and picked him up easily.

I could only watch in horror?

Is that entirely true?

"Yenra, no! Teleport, something!" I managed to cry, finding my voice.

I could see him shimmer, as though he were attempting to Teleport, but the Machop tightened his grip and leapt into the air, spinning around and then somersaulting mid-air; as he was facing the ground, at least 14 feet in the air, he chucked Yenra straight for the floor.

"Raaa!" He cried, but it was too late. We all heard the audible crack of his spine as he landed, face-down, with a soul-shocking _thud_.

"_No_!" I cried, running towards him with abandon. Yenra didn't tremble or spasm, as Tradden and Grigori had; no, he was dead on arrival. I didn't touch him; he was broken in ways I couldn't believe, hadn't ever seen in a Pokemon before. I muffled a cry, shoving my fist into my mouth and therefore stopping the tears, too.

"Yenra, oh God. Oh God, I'm so sorry," I shouted into my fist, turning it into a meaningless prayer for understanding.

I had forgotten my audience in my shellshocked grief and horror.

The Rocket before me laughed – a horrible mistake. I slowly turned my eyes into his, and he scowled.

"You gonna finish the match? Or are you scared your whole team'll go splat, like that one?" He asked, and every semblance of humanity in his face faded, leaving a heartless demon in its place. One I wanted to destroy with every fiber of my being.

"Oh, no," I said slowly. "None of my Pokemon will look like that. You're going to _wish_ you looked like that when I'm done with you."

My hand gripped Yenra's Poke Ball, and I recalled his mangled body. The Poke Ball grew noticeably colder after it held him, but I only tucked it away in my pack, instead of clipping it to my belt.

"Xander, go!"

The fire of hatred burned away sorrow inside – I was left with smoldering ashes, simmering rage that roared when oxygen touched it with every ragged breath.

"Xander, Wing Attack!"

His wings flexing, my sleek blue bloodsucker beat him into submission with his wings – the Machop collapsed.

The Rocket hissed.

"Go, Drowzee!"

"Xander," I said coldly, "Bite."

Teeth bared, Xander shrieked, then dove for the elephant-like Psychic type. It was yellow on top and brown on bottom, but all I saw was the evil its trainer had bestowed on it. All I saw was the death of another of my Pokemon – this time one I barely knew, one that was one level from evolving into a Kadabra. One that was young and innocent, like the rest of them had been - Grigori, Tradden...

One Bite from Xander sent the stupid fat Psychic down.

The Rocket backed away as he saw the murder bleeding from my eyes. We both turned in surprise, however, when Xander cried, "Zuzubat!" And began to glow white.

As he expanded before me, his jaws dropping open, fangs ripening, I only sighed. My Pokemon only seemed to evolve in the wake of a tragedy, and I was sorry already for dragging them along in my twisted quest to prove something to myself and everyone back home.

"Golll," he screeched, flapping much larger, tenebrous wings to send a gust of sharp wind into the Rocket's face.

"Ugh, shit! Get your crazy fucker off me," he cried, holding a hand to his cut.

"Give me what you took and get the fuck out of my sight, you murderer," I snapped. "Xander here has strong wings, but if you cross me one more time, you'll find out that his teeth are stronger."

The Rocket fumbled in his pocket, handed me a disc, and left quickly. I held the disc up, saw the glint of moonlight on it, and read: "Dig." I paused, and wiped my eyes on my arm. "Tradden would have loved this." I pocketed it, then reached out to hug Xander.

"Good job, Xander. God, I'm proud of you. All of you," I said out loud. He nodded, nuzzling against me.

"Golgolbat." His voice was sympathetic.

"Yenra had so much potential, goddamnit," I said, my voice haggard. "He was almost a Kadabra, and…"

"Golbat," Xander seemed to whisper. I could almost read his words: _We all have to die._

"Maybe, but does it always have to be my fault?"

* * *

Yenra's burial was an hour later, right by the route where I caught him. Kashen and Tobias both stood by me, ashamed of their treatment, I could tell. Instead of burying his broken body, I set his Poke Ball in the dirt, and the four of us covered it, Xander using his padded feet to sweep dirt onto it.

"Bye, buddy," I said, blinking away moisture. "I'm going to keep going. For _all of us_," I said, and Kashen turned away.

I said nothing more; my dreams that night weren't, as I expected, of Yenra, or his death, or any other death, for that matter.

It was a nightmare of hellish proportions, though, and when I awoke, the word on my lips and in my head was _failure_.

* * *

**Current Team:**

Charmeleon: "Kashen" – Male, Level 22

Raticate: "Tobias" – Male, Level 21

Golbat: "Xander" – Male, Level 22


	10. Counting Seven Crows

**Locke and Key: **_A Nuzlocke Story_

A/N: Whoo. Long chapter. (: Thanks for the reviews, and also - thanks to the Alerts and Favorites! It made my day to see all of that!

* * *

"If the people we love are stolen from us, the way to have them live forever is to never stop loving them. Buildings burn, people die, but real love is forever."

-_The Crow_, 1994

* * *

The next few days were hard.

I couldn't bring myself to think about it too much, but when I finally did, I didn't like what I saw in my head. I didn't like that I was risking lives. I didn't like that I was taking Pokemon from the wild only to ruin their lives, then fucking _taking _them.

I didn't like myself, and for that I'm sorry even now, but it's only the truth, and that's what I've sworn to tell here.

After Yenra's burial, my team and I traveled south. I hadn't beaten Misty – I hadn't even ventured into her gym yet – but my Pokemon team was diminished twice now since I'd come to Cerulean.

Looking back, that city took a lot of lives from my team, but I left stronger for it. I know that now.

There was a small, homey-looking building amid patches of tall grass. A sign outside the building read "Day-Care Man: I'll Level Up Your Pokemon For Free".

I disregarded him; I was worried about the tall grass, instead.

Looking tentatively at Tobias, who stood by my side, nose and whiskers quivering as he smelled the air, we walked into the grass and were ambushed by a Pidgey.

"Huh. Well, it's a decent level," I thought, then smiled and threw a Poke Ball. The bird broke free and fluttered up into the air, hovering above ground to snicker at me, it seemed.

"Shit. Tobias, Quick Attack, but be gentle," I told my Raticate.

'Gentle' wasn't in his vocabulary, but luckily the Pidgey was a tough one. Clinging to one gristle of HP, it went without struggling into my next Poke Ball.

"Aero," I said, and although Kashen wasn't out, I could feel approval – call me crazy; sometimes I even think it myself.

* * *

Aero proved to be a good choice. Level 15 at capture, he was a perfect filler for Yenra the Abra, and within a few battles, he'd stopped walking around, proudly preening his white and brown feathers, and he began glowing white.

"Pidgeoooo," cried my new bird as he lifted itself into the air on much stronger, prettier, more impressive wings. I cheered inside – a Pidgeotto, probably lots better than Green's! Aero flapped his wings once, sending a Gust attack at the Bug Catcher's Caterpie; the thing went flying, and we went on to our next victory.

The road we were on had a lot of trainers on it, but they all seemed to be interested in other things beside battling, I noticed as we walked on.

A boy and a girl stood next to one another, lips puffy, glistening and red. I wonder what _they_ were doing.

"Hey," I called, rushing up to them, Aero on my shoulder, "We need to battle. We're almost ready to fight Misty—"

"Well, you're off track," the boy said, pulling away. Even his hair was mussed. _Jeez, they're really going at it,_ I thought smugly. "This path will take you to Vermillion City, where Lt. Surge is the gym leader."

"Oh. I'll have to remember that for after I beat _Misty_. So, battle me?" I asked, smiling.

He sighed heavily.

"...Fine."

He reluctantly pulled away from his girlfriend, revealing a single Poke Ball on his belt. His girlfriend looked less than pleased to be interrupted, but who gave a shit about her?

"Go, Squirtle!" He called. I blinked, realizing something as I gazed at little blue turtle. Besides Green, this guy was the only person I'd met with a starter Pokemon, which seemed slightly ironic to me.

"Aero, go."

"Pidgeoo," he cooed, sweeping into the air majestically and landing dramatically, sending sand flying into the Squirtle's eyes.

"Squirtle squirt," it bubbled, raising a trembling paw to wipe grit from its gaze, as Aero flapped his wings to send a spiraling gust into its shell-protected belly.

"No! Squirtle, Water Gun, quick!" The camper cried, adjusting his hat to hide his bedroom look as we battled.

"Aero, take the hit. We're not going to be fancy here; you're going to win no matter what." My arrogance should have bitten me in the ass right there, but nope. It waited. Karma waits like a preying tiger in the shadows of a rain forest, does it not?

"Okay, Aero, finish it off with a Gust!"

Aero's strong wings sent another small tornado into the Squirtle. He went down, and, happily, I raised my fist.

"Great! Another win! We haven't lost yet, Aero!"

He looked my way, black-masked eyes smiling when his beak couldn't. "Pidgeooootto," he agreed.

My Pidgeotto lifted his wings to fly into the sky again, circling the other trainers - and basically just showing off. I should have named him Green, truthfully; he was so _vain_.

The guy who lost scooped up his Squirtle to return it, glaring at me. His girl touched his shoulder, looking determined.

"You interrupted us for _that_? That battle was pathetic." Her grin was cold. I smirked right back at the dumb bitch, wearing a stupid camping outfit. Maybe her boyfriend wasn't into nurses or Catwoman or police officers.

"Pathetic, huh? Tell your boyfriend to either get a pair of balls or some better Pokemon, then," I snapped right back at her.

"You _bitch_. Go, Rattata!" She cried, sending it down in a flash of white. It seemed to hiss in its own rat-like way as it glared, purple and proud, at me.

Uh, no.

"Aero, come on, Sand Attack!" I cried, pointing my finger at the rodent. At my command, my glorious Flying-type swooped down, its turbulence sweeping up sand and dust from the ground to sweep lavishingly into the Rattata's eyes. However, just as a wingful of dirt was aimed for its face, the trainer called,

"Quick Attack!"

Moving like lightning, the Rattata moved underneath Aero and then came up under his pale, low-flying belly, sending him up into the air with a painful squawk. The dust in his wings fell to the ground, useless and unspent.

"Ugh! Aero! Use—"

"Rattata, Hyper Fang!"

"Not so fast!" I thought quick. "Aero, keep yourself in the air! Don't let that thing's teeth near you!"

Shaken, Aero flew as high as he could – which, without the HM move Fly, was not very high. It was just out of the Rattata's reach, really. Bird Pokemon could fly the highest of all Flying types, but without the move Fly, no Pokemon could truly soar – especially in a battle. Outside of battle, they could go to higher altitudes, as long as no human clung to them.

I could tell, Aero was tired of waiting for a command, and truthfully, I was too. His black-patched eyes glared down predatorily at the Rattata.

"Okay, Aero, swoop down with your own Quick Attack!"

Aero looked tentative, but he did tuck his wings into his side and cannon down into the girl's Rattata. It was hit, but as it flinched in pain, it quickly latched its glowing teeth into Aero's wing. The Pidgeotto squawked again in more sudden pain, but out of panic, he attempted to fly upwards, tearing the teeth further into his flesh and feathers.

"Aero, no! Quick, use Gust! Get it off!" I cried, getting frantic. Angrily, Aero used his remaining wing to weakly beat at the gnawing rat. The beating caused a small Gust attack to blow it away, spiraling back to its trainers feet.

"Oh, thank God, Aero. Good job." I spritzed his wing with a Potion I had in my bag, noticing that it didn't get healed all the way, but at least he wasn't on the brink of death anymore.

"Pidgeoo," he cooed, satisfied.

"Fine. Go, Pikachu!" The camper slut called, sending out a small yellow mouse-thing. It was far cuter than Rattata, and from the charged red sacs on its cheeks, I knew it was also more powerful.

"Aero…" I knew I should have switched. But I was a fool, as usual. "Aero, we can do this. You're _so_ close to level twenty!"

"Pidgeoo," he agreed savagely. At least he was with me to the end.

"Pikachu, Thunder Wave!"

"Piiikaa!" It cried - a battlecry, I guess - cutely.

The sacs began to spark, then the rat's whole body was sparking. A weak thunderbolt flew at Aero, but it clipped his wings effectively, paralyzing him.

"No! Ughh. Aero, Quick Attack, come on!"

"Pikachu, use Quick Attack, too!"

Despite his paralysis, Aero grudgingly flexed sparking, numb wings, attempting to fly over quickly as possible. His gait was slow, however, and the Pikachu was fast – faster than any Quick Attack I'd _ever_ seen. At the time, it was unbeknownst to me that Electric types could move almost at the speed of light.

Needless to say, the Quick Attacks collided. Aero's wasn't so quick, but he recovered rapidly.

"Aero, Gust!" I called, forgetting that it wasn't very effective.

However, when he raised his wings for combat, they froze up. Fully paralyzed. _Shit._

"Okay, Pikachu, use Thundershock!"

_No, no.._. "No!"

"Piiikaaachuuu!" It cried, leaping into the air and spewing electricity. It stunned my frozen Pidgeotto, and, exhausted and used, Aero stumbled briefly on shaking talons. His feathers were charred in places, and his body was scratched; he glanced towards me, murmuring "Pidgeoo," before he collapsed in a heap of burning feathers.

My mind went blank as I stood there, almost not comprehending the sight before me. My Pidgeotto. _Dead_. I had just caught him a few hours earlier - a young fowl, little spry Pidgey, and now he was dead. Again, my team's fourth member had fallen. _At my expense._

I stepped forward, touched him hesitantly; he was already cold.

"Aero. You did so well, buddy. You deserve a rest." I lowered my eyes, ashamed to meet the eyes of my challenger or her murdering Pikachu. Aero's Poke Ball sucked his dead body up, then grew cold to the touch as I tucked it away in my backpack.

"Kashen, go!"

The rage didn't rip through me until my Charmeleon was released; flames were already spewing in his mouth, violence untamed, a forest fire waiting to wreck. Could he sense my distress? Was he just raring for blood? An eye for an eye?

"Ember!"

He scorched the trembling little mouse, and the camper girl cried into her boyfriend's wimpy shoulder. I watched them, wondering if she held any remorse for killing my Pidgeotto – but I saw none. I hadn't seen any remorse yet, but I had felt it myself.

Kashen turned to me, eyes damp.

"Charr," he said softly, but I returned him.

I didn't need his comfort.

And... I wasn't willing to face my Pokemon this time.

Aero's grave was near the Day-Care Man's house, in a patch of grass where Pidgeys crooned, Bellsprouts photosynthesized, and cat-like shadows moved around me, unblinking and unseen.

"Bye, Aero. I was hoping you'd stick around to the end, but I was wrong…" _As usual._

* * *

"Marlen. You're my last hope."

I had released my Pokemon, as the night was young and Misty's door was still wide open. They had trained a little, but we were mostly ready for her and her gym trainers. Kashen stood, arms crossed and face blank; he looked out over the river, where the sunset made the water bleed red. I had a feeling he was deep in thought, though I wasn't sure what about. The deaths of Tradden, Yenra and Aero? All my fault?

Tobias sat away from the rest of the group, looking over us as though he wanted to join us, but knew it was best not too. His solitary nature was still an admirable, if annoying, trait of his.

Xander flitted crazily in the air, attacking children and stop signs. I tried my best to ignore his random screeching.

Marlen sat in my lap, allowing my hands to stroke his fur – pale cream, the color of foam on a cappuccino. He stared up at me, eyes diamond-shaped; they seemed to steal the shine from the golden slab on his forehead. His tail curled behind him, tinted darker brown than his fur, while he groomed his front claws – his weapons of choice.

Marlen was my new Meowth. After burying Aero, I'd gone back to where he'd died – the trail of trainers who had told me I was on the way to Vermillion City. The grass was tall, and the first thing I'd come across was a male Meowth, level twelve. Now Marlen was level seventeen, but I didn't have any more time to train him before the gym closed.

It was now or never.

"Let's go, everyone. Time to get my second gym badge."

_Hopefully._

* * *

I walked into the building, a little surprised. I expected a replica of Brock's official, bare-looking gym, décor consisting of a boulder here or there to keep with the theme of "here there be Rock types", but I was wrong. The gym had a walkway that offered a route around the gym trainer, and then surreptitiously forced you into a battle with a tough-looking girl in a corner.

Misty sat near a referee, wearing a string bikini and looking bored. Her red hair was down and dripping wet, and she looked undeniably bored. She had two Poke Balls on the belt at her waist – not part of the bikini, I'm guessing – and I knew the Pokemon in them to be Staryu and Starmie.

All around the layout of the floor was a twelve-foot deep pool of heavily chlorinated water. The gym smelled like a fucking water park.

"How do your Pokemon train in that disgusting water?" I said loudly, my voice echoing in the bad acoustics of the room.

Misty laughed, and Diana – her bikini was skimpier than Misty's – smirked. "We train our Pokemon in the lake water outside. This gym's pool is for _us_." With that, she pulled her long hair back and leapt gracefully into the water, barely making a splash.

The only guy in the gym – some nerd wearing goggles and a Speedo – picked up a Poke Ball.

"Are you going to go around me like everyone else, or can I actually battle today?" He said, rolling his eyes.

"I'll battle you." I nodded to the cat at my side. "Marlen, go!"

"Go, Horsea!"

…Jeez. Were there any manly Water types?

Marlen looked a little afraid to be battling on an arena with so much water around, but I knew there was little chance he'd get knocked in by a Horsea. The cute blue seahorse floated nimbly above ground, then squirted water into my Pokemon's face.

"Meeowth!" He hissed, unsheathing his claws.

"Marlen, Dig!"

Magically clawing his way under the floor of the gym, the cat vanished, and the Horsea stood alone on the battlefield. Looking confused, he backed back up to his trainer – only to be hit from underneath by Marlen. It squealed, then shot a stream of bubbles from its nose.

"Marlen, evade them! Use Bite!"

Teeth gleaming, Marlen leapt for the Horsea, digging his teeth into the Horsea's wet turquoise flesh. It squealed in pain again, and then fluttered down to its trainer's feet, fainted.

"Okay…" the trainer fumbled for his other Poke Ball. "Go, Shellder!"

"Deerrr," a little purple clam said. It had an empty black area for its face, two big derpy eyes, and a drooling tongue. It looked like a winner.

"Marlen, Scratch!"

"Meeowth!" He ran up to the Shellder, dragging his claws over the thing's purple shell. It made a horrendous nails-on-a-chalkboard-noise and left some gridlines, but it hadn't appeared to do any damage.

"Shellder, Icicle Spear!" Called the trainer in a Speedo. It made me slightly uncomfortable to look at him, so I kept my eyes on Marlen and Shellder at all times.

"Shellllder!" It said, shooting a series of long blades of ice at Marlen, who managed to dodge two of them but was hit three times in the sides.

"Meow!" He cried, falling. Blood oozed from the gashes in his flanks. I blinked, realizing that, unless I wanted another casualty on my hands today, I should call him back soon. He was still on fairly good health right now, but…

"Marlen, Dig on Shellder!"

He nodded, holding his paws to his sides, and burrowed underground once more. The Shellder spit water into the hole, but there was no noise from beneath. Suddenly, Marlen came up from underneath the Shellder and sent it skyrocketing.

Still not much damage. Jeez, how much defense did this fucker have?

"Shellder, Icicle Spear!"

"Marlen, evade them! Come on!"

Panting, Marlen looked up, hit by one on his back. He was still doing okay. Another hit – staggering, he still managed to stand. An icicle fell on the side of his head, clipping one soft black kitty ear. He yowled, staggered backwards. Another crashed on his head. He fell flat on his stomach, meowing weakly.

I reached for his Poke Ball, but Icicle Spear hit five times that day.

The last one shattered in his face, and blood dripped from long white whiskers as Marlen gave his last meow.

* * *

I sat outside on the sidewalk, smoking my last cigarette. No emotions rolled inside; I was apathetic, worn thin by tragedies one after the other, beaten senseless by guilt and blame.

I hadn't buried Marlen. I didn't have time to go back to the path I'd caught him at, and I still had a driving desire to beat Misty – so Marlen's capture, training, and death wouldn't be for nothing.

I looked at the three Poke Balls in my hands, then at the one stationery in my bag.

Tears clipped the corners of my eyes.

"I'm going to have three fucking Pokemon forever," I mumbled, my voice hoarse.

I'd lost so many since I'd come to Cerulean City. I'd drained every possible route here looking for partners. Tradden, my Sandshrew, killed on Nugget Bridge; Yenra, my Abra, destroyed by a Rocket grunt; Aero, my Pidgeotto, gunned down by a Camper's Pikachu, and Marlen, my Meowth, killed by a gym trainer's Shellder.

It was always my fault. I always took risks, and it was that realization that made me take a long drag on my cigarette, then drop it, snuffing it with one skid of my shoes.

It was time to go back inside, and it was time to make all those deaths worth something.

* * *

Diana smirked when I walked back in, but Misty looked surprised.

"Guess you haven't had enough, huh?" The swimmer said smugly.

I smiled right back.

"I guess I never have enough. Care to battle, hooker?"

Diana's eyes nearly popped out of her head, her waterproof mascara making them look all the larger.

"You'll not get away with calling me that, challenger. I'll get rid of all your Pokemon so Misty won't have to bother," she laughed.

Misty said nothing, only looked interested.

"Bring it, bitch."

Diana gripped a Poke Ball – the only one she carried with her, it seemed – to release a high-leveled Goldeen.

Useless. The little red and white, water-tailed goldfish wasn't going to be any match for my Pokemon, even if it did have a horn.

"Go, Tobias."

My Raticate leapt onto the battlefield, and he looked like a berserker.

"Goldeen, Supersonic!"

"Tobias, Quick Attack, then Hyper Fang!"

Rays of confusion rippled into the air, but they missed Tobias completely. Shooting off like a jackrabbit with feet of lightning, he tumbled into the Goldeen at breakneck speed, knocking it over as it wailed in a deep, elegant voice: "Goldeendeen!"

After taking it down, Tobias opened his mouth wide to chomp down on the fish's soft, exposed belly. It flinched and hopped around a lot, but in the end, Tobias won.

"Guess a gym trainer should invest in better Pokemon," I sneered, stepping up to Misty's plate.

She didn't give me the usual speech, only looked down at me with some curiosity.

"You came in here even after your Meowth died?" She asked, but she didn't sound appalled or condescending. She sounded… almost admiring. I didn't like it and I didn't agree.

"Yeah. I know. I'm scum. But…" I looked at Tobias, who quivered angrily at my feet. "…If I don't win this, my Meowth – and all of the other Pokemon who have died for my quest – their deaths will be meaningless."

Misty pondered this, then smiled slightly.

"Challenger, choose your first Pokemon."

I nodded. "Go, Xander!"

Tobias looked crestfallen, but he backed away, giving my wild Golbat enough room.

"Staryu."

Spinning prettily, the genderless, personalityless Staryu appeared, a kind of dull gold starfish with a glowing pink-red gym in its center.

"Xander, use Bite!"

"Staryu, Water Pulse!"

_Whoa. Intense attack. At least, more intense than Water Gun._

Xander flew for Staryu, but it blasted him backwards with a pulse of strong water. He dizzily got back to his feet, but I could see he was confused. And I didn't want to battle with a Pokemon liable to hurt himself in his confusion and end up dead.

_No more risks, Leaf, you hoe,_ I thought, then recalled Xander – for now. I glanced at Tobias, who seemed excited to get the chance to battle again. His energy – restless energy, probably; I hadn't used him much recently – could be put to savage good use.

"Tobias, Hyper Fang!"

He lunged for Staryu, who spun in place, trying to knock him away. The fangs on my Raticate lusted blood – or whatever Staryu had in its veins – and clamped on anyways.

The Water type spun around, angry and in pain, I'm guessing, though it made no discernible sounds. Tobias held on, his teeth buried deep in Staryu's cold flesh, until it finally passed out from the pain.

Shaking himself, Tobias jumped back, quivering with what seemed like joy. I thought him slightly maniac, but I sort of liked it at the same time. "Good job, Tobias," I said, scratching him between his ears.

Misty sighed, then called Staryu back.

"Go, Starmie!"

The evolved form of Staryu was unleashed in a flash of brilliant white light; similar to Staryu, Starmie was larger, prettier in purple, and had more… fins? Legs? To Starmie's five. The gem was larger and glowed a deeper red than Staryu's had.

"Tobias. I'm sorry, buddy, but I need Xander for this one," I told the Raticate. He looked a little disappointed, but nodded in surprising agreement.

"Caate."

I sent out Xander after recalling him. In a flash, my big fangbanger opened his large, tenebrous wings, impressively hovering before Starmie.

"Bite, Xander!"

"Starmie, Water Pulse!"

I thought quickly, remembering what had happened to him with Staryu. "Okay, Xander, get hit with Water Pulse; I know it'll hurt, but you'll get to Starmie quicker that way."

Instead of questioning me, Xander recklessly threw himself into the Water Pulse, not getting confused this time, but getting slightly damaged. After throwing droplets off of him by shaking, Xander used dark-powered fangs to cling to Starmie, who made a surreal computerized noise of agony.

Those genderless Pokemon creep me the fuck out, I'm not gonna lie.

Starmie didn't get a chance to use Water Pulse again; thankfully, the large, half Psychic-half Water type had flinched at the pain from Xander's teeth.

"Bite it again, Xander!"

At this slash of the fangs, Starmie's agonized… noise… was echoed throughout the small chlorine-scented gym, and it collapsed, leaving me with my second gym badge – and a victory for the Pokemon I'd lost in Cerulean.

I walked out with Misty's respect, the Cascadebadge, a TM, some more money, and peace of mind – at least, for now.

* * *

We camped outside again. I don't care what you hear about the Pokemon Centers – they are _not_ safe places to sleep in. Last time I tried, people tried to molest my Pokemon and tried to sell me drugs I'd never even _heard_ of. Do you know how odd that is? For me to not have heard of a drug?

Kashen looked at the stars with me, Tobias on my lap instead of in the corner alone, and Xander lie calmly by my side – something was off about my Pokemon, but for once, it was in a good way.

_Nothing's _off_, you pessimist, _I dared to think, and the next thought brought a real smile to my lips – lips that had been bitten in anger and shame too often, and lips that had trembled but not screamed in grief. _They're starting to need you as much as you need them. Hell… they might even be starting to love you, although don't stretch it._

_Yeah? Well, maybe I'm starting to love them, too,_ I thought, stroking Tobias's fur absentmindedly. _Yeah. Maybe I am._


	11. Blind by the Sun

**Locke and Key:** _A Nuzlocke Story_

A/N: Thanks for the reviews/alerts/favorites, everyone. :) I appreciate everything a great deal, and I'm going to take everyone's advice and work on the content some more.

* * *

Don't go looking for snakes; you might find them.  
Don't send your eyes to the sun; you might blind them.  
Haven't I seen you here before?  
No, there ain't no heroes here.  
-Metallica, "Slither"; _ReLoad_.

* * *

Dawn couldn't have come earlier that next morning; my back was so stiff, you'd have thought I'd slept on a pile of rocks. When I lifted my head to look around, it pulsed with a savage headache. _Damn it!_

The gray of the dawn hadn't quite been burned away by the rising sun yet, and few people were out at this early hour – at least, from where I could see. The trainers on the route where Aero had died and Marlen had been caught were no longer standing idly around, but I knew they'd be back around noon - grinding again, the endless dance of trainer and Pokemon.

Stretching and feeling my limbs creak, I remembered yesterday's events with a slight start. Fumbling in my pack, I found my little drawstring pouch. Inside the dark velvet, two gleaming pieces of colored glass shone back at me – the silver-gray of the Boulderbadge, and now the crystalline Cascadebadge. My day immediately improved at the knowledge that I was actually making it in the world – I was really becoming someone in the Indigo League.

I could remember, as a young girl, watching upperclassmen return home from their journeys, dispirited, their team depleted after Brock or Misty's gym battle. At the time, I hadn't cared; truthfully, Leaf Brannigan hadn't wanted to be a Pokemon trainer until she'd been caught smoking by Professor Oak in the tall grass of Route 1.

"Charr," yawned the curled-up body next to me; Kashen slept like a cat, even now, with his tail curled deftly around his larger red body.

"Lazy," I teased, scratching him around his dragon's horn. He looked surprised at my affectionate touch, but blinked in pleasure anyways.

"Meleon." He stood, stretching, and kicked Tobias and Xander awake. They both lie flat on their backs, snoring away.

"It's okay, kid. Let them sleep. I'll just put them in their Poke Balls." As I pulled two of my Balls out of my belt, I thought of something. With Team Rocket running around, stealing and killing, was it really all that safe of me to leave them lying out like expensive jewelry without a glass case? I was practically begging someone to come steal them.

_Well. Guess you guys just spent your last night out of your Poke Balls,_ I thought. The idea of Team fucking Rocket taking any of my Pokemon while we slept was enough to make my skin crawl.

We stumbled along, the early morning slowly losing its coolness. Soon, the sun was high in the sky and the day was hot as Hell warmed over.

A Bug Catcher – straw hat was a dead giveaway – stood off to the side of the path, thick in the tall grass. Hunting for bugs, I guess, but I could see only one Poke Ball clipped to his belt.

That usually meant good things – I hoped I'd get to see an unusual or strong Pokemon. When a trainer had only one Pokemon in Kanto, it was usually worth seeing or battling.

"Hey, you! Battle me!" I called, not wasting time. Who needs preliminaries?

He turned, saw my Charmeleon, and rolled his eyes.

"Are you from Pallet Town?" He asked, eyeing my Fire type, who crossed his arms across his narrow chest and spit a scrap of fire to make himself look tough.

"Yeah. How'd you know? You from Pallet Town too?" I asked, searching his eyes for any trace of someone I might have known.

He laughed. "Oh, no. I'm from Pewter City. It's right by Viridian Forest, so I got the chance to catch Jewel." He thumbed his only Poke Ball, a loving look entering his eyes almost immediately.

"Jewel?" Didn't sound like a Weedle's name. Or a Scyther's. Too bad.

"Yeah. How about I show you?"

"Bring it." It was still a Bug type. I nodded to Kashen, who uncrossed his arms and stepped forward.

"Go, Jewel!"

After the light of the Poke Ball faded, a much prettier Bug type unfurled large, clear wings laced with black membrane. A purple butterfly fluttered gently before us, crying, "Freeee."

Butterfree. Huh. Level twenty, too. It would be great prey for Kashen, who already had an ember burning in his jaws, I could see.

"Kashen, Mega Punch!"

He looked at me briefly, as if to say _You crazy?_, before he pulled a fist back, glowing white with energy.

"Jewel, use a Stun Spore attack!" My opponent cried.

"Free," it said in a whistling voice before flapping its wings. A golden dust flitted from the fluttering bug, and Kashen's fist halted as he was left sparking and frozen in place.

"Just fucking great," I sighed. "Kashen, Ember!" Looks like I had no more time to waste, if it was going to play with my statuses.

Sparking, Kashen still managed to spit a small flame at Jewel. She was hit, and the flames spread to her wings, effectively burning her.

"Sweet. Kashen, Ember again! Finish this battle!"

He opened his mouth again, but stopped midway. Fully paralyzed. Shit, my Pokemon were always getting paralyzed on this route.

"Jewel, use Confusion!"

The air before us shimmered, and a mental blast of purple energy clobbered Kashen, sending him backwards a few steps. I glanced at his face to see if he was okay, and just about had a conniption when I saw the dizzy, dazed expression in his blue eyes.

Paralyzed _and_ confused? What the hell?

"…Okay. No. Return, Kashen." I remembered my vow last night, sitting on the sidewalk outside Misty's gym, throwing my cigarette onto the concrete and scraping it out.

No more risks.

Not ever.

"Go, Xander!"

"Golgol!" He cried after he was unleashed, flapping far more powerful wings than Jewel's.

The Bug Catcher's eyes gleamed. "Jewel, Sleep Powder and then Confusion!"

Uh. Confusion… Psychic move… super-effective.

_I don't think so._

"Xander, use Wing Attack! Finish this thing!"

Swooping forward on powerful dark wings, Xander lifted one and heavily smacked Jewel, who had been ready to dust him with green sleeping powder.

After two super-effective moves from two high-leveled Pokemon, Jewel went down, exhausted.

The Bug Catcher sighed.

"Return, Jewel."

I smiled at Xander, who shrieked happily.

"Good job, buddy. Not that I didn't know you wouldn't win." I smiled smugly at the other trainer, who rolled his eyes.

"Right. You can gloat when you come back with Surge's badge. I'd like to see you fight _him_ with _that_," he said, pointing to Xander.

I frowned, suddenly angry.

"I bet I could. Why aren't _you_ in there beating him, if you're so great?"

"Butterfree's a Flying type." He glanced at Jewel's Poke Ball worriedly. "Surge's gym is full of electricity, including his most powerful – Raichu."

"…Raichu?" I was picturing the little yellow rat that had killed Aero, and I grit my teeth. "Isn't that…"

"Pikachu's evolved form? Yeah. And tough as hell." He looked back at Xander, then smirked.

"Good luck, that's all I gotta say. You might want to get another Pokemon before you go marching in there with a Golbat and a Charmeleon."

"…I have a Raticate, too," I protested weakly.

He looked at me pityingly.

"There's a cave east of Vermillion City. It's called Diglett Cave. You might want to invest in a visit."

* * *

Vermillion loomed over the last trainer. From the hill I stood on, I could see a sprawling city with a harbor, the sea glinting around the shining buildings. _Wow_.

"Hey, you gonna fight me or stare at the ocean?" Complained the camper beside me.

I turned back to him, smirking. "If you really wanna go, sure. You'll probably end up like your girlfriend over there." I nodded to where she was cuddling three deep-fried Pidgeys.

"…She's my sister."

"Not surprising. Come on."

He looked frustrated, but sent out his first Pokemon anyways. An aggressive-looking little bird appeared, red, brown and black – Spearow. It's fierce eyes stared into mine, trying to intimidate me, I guess.

I sent out Tobias in retaliation, who pawed the earth like a bull beckoning the matador.

"Use Quick Attack, then Hyper Fang," I said offhandedly to the Raticate.

He lunged forward in a flash of tawny fur, then barreled into the little bird. Just before it could rise and retaliate, Tobias opened his jaws and sank his fearsome fangs into its shoulderblade.

It wasn't long before the Spearow passed out, and in turn, the camper pulled out another Poke Ball. This time, the flash revealed a Pokemon similar to Tobias – another Raticate, although smaller and less crazed-looking.

I smiled. Tobias loved good competition.

"Quick Attack, Tobias!"

"Scary Face, Raticate!"

Tobias shot forward as Raticate made a grotesque expression, reducing my Pokemon's speed. It didn't matter with Quick Attack, though; seconds later, the opponent was hit.

"Hyper Fang!" We called simultaneously.

Raticate used his Hyper Fang first, having chopped off Tobias's speed, and as it latched onto his shoulder, he sank his more powerful fangs into Raticate's fleshy back.

A circle of chomping – I admit, it looked fearsome as they both gnawed at each other, growling and salivating all over the other's fur. I wanted to keep watching and look away concurrently.

"Okay, Tobias, Quick Attack!"

Retracting his teeth, Tobias barreled into the Raticate. They were so close together that the impact sent the other flying – and he fainted from the blow.

"Caate," Tobias panted.

"Great job, Tobias!" I called, rushing over to where he stood. His shoulder bled freely, but he seemed to be in decent condition otherwise. I pulled him back into his Poke Ball while the camper seemed to be watching me.

"What do you want?" I snapped. "If you took a picture, it'd—"

"You may have beaten us," he interrupted, gesturing to his sister, "but you'll never beat Surge with those."

"Who the fuck do you think you are? My Pokemon annihilated your Pokemon - easily - and you're giving me shit? You really need a reality check," I growled, stalking away from him.

The trainers on this route… so freaking _nervy_.

"Hey, wait!" He called, looking like he wanted to offer me some advice. "Make sure your Raticate knows Dig."

"Fuck you," I responded.

Marlen had known Dig. That TM was gone forever.

* * *

When I arrived in Vermillion's Pokemon Center, watching the smiling nurse heal Kashen, Tobias and Xander, I noticed a girl in a blonde ponytail playing with a device beside me.

"What is that, an iPhone?" I asked, curious.

She rolled her eyes at me. _Damn, these trainers get on my last nerve. Why does everyone in this city have an attitude?_

"No, it's a _VS Seeker_," she emphasized, as though I should have known.

"And what the bloody hell would that be?"

She gave me a pitying look, like I was a complete social retard. "Um, it's only the coolest, latest item in battling technology."

"..Kay, but what does it _do_?"

"It lets you battle trainers you've already battled."

"…You mean, it's like an invitation to battle someone again?"

"Sorta. You send a text message to them, asking them if they want to battle again. If they say yes, you can fight them again; if you don't get a reply, they aren't ready yet." She picked at her little device some more.

"Where do you get one?"

She looked disgusted.

"Here, if I give you mine, will you leave me alone? Gosh."

So that's how I left the Pokemon Center with a VS Seeker.

* * *

As I strolled through the pristine streets of Vermillion City, I came upon the harbor. A pier – a long bridge that lead to an enormous building, most likely housing the cruise ship – was being guarded by a beefy-looking dude in a sailor outfit. I guess he was a bouncer of sorts.

I looked down at the Poke Balls clipped to my belt, then remembered everyone's advice.

"Hey," I called, running up to the bouncer. His face didn't change expression. "…Uh. What time does the S. S. Anne leave?"

His mouth moved. "4:30 p.m."

_I have an hour._

"Okay, thanks."

He didn't respond.

* * *

"Okay, east of the city…" I looked up from my tattered map. A small cave was dug into the side of a low mountain, with a messily lettered sign reading "Diglett Cave". The letters were drawn on messily, with charcoal, it looked like.

East of the cave was a long route with lots of tall grass and a bunch of trainers milling about, wasting time and not even battling each other in the sluggish dry heat.

"Diglett Cave it is, then."

I crawled inside, surprised to see that it was relatively light, somewhat like Mt. Moon. You didn't need a flashlight, or the Flash attack, but when I gazed up, I realized why: the tunnel had an entire roof of earth in which light poured through.

I remembered what the young boy had told me in the Pokemon Center: "_Diglett Cave was created entirely by Diglett and Dugtrio. And be careful if you're going in there. Diglett are most common, but two Dugtrio rule the cave, and if they sense you, they will fight._"

Dugtrio didn't scare me; they were only three Diglett put together. Or… that's what I heard. Wasn't the same true for Magneton, Dodrio or Exeggutor? _Hmm… maybe I should be careful,_ I thought.

I stepped onto a lower level, seeing a long expansion of dirt-encrusted tunnel. There were movements under my feet, and as I walked through the musty-smelling cave, a sudden cry of "Diglettt!" made me shout and stumble backwards.

The little fucker came up right under my feet, staring at me with tiny, bead-like eyes that didn't blink. Its enormous pink nose and smooth brown head were all I could see of it; if it had anything else on it's body, it was under the earth.

"Hah. Great. You're mine, little Diglett." I looked at my choices, then chose Xander, who couldn't be hit by Dig or Magnitude.

"Okay, Xander. Use Astonish, and just slowly weaken him down," I told my Golbat.

"Batbat."

He flew down, ramming up against the small mole in order to shock it. It flinched the first time, but the second time it retaliated.

"Diggglettt!" It cried loudly, then whipped itself around in its hole. The movement was quick and smooth, and it cut Xander while it spun. That little pawless fucker just used Scratch? Unbelievable…

"…Uh. Xander, Astonish again, but this time hit it hard. I don't want to waste anymore time in this creepy fucking tunnel."

"Golbat," he agreed, ramming himself into the Diglett and effectively causing it to flinch in shock.

Reaching in my bag for an empty Poke Ball, I grabbed the only thing I had – a Great Ball.

"Okay, this is better, I guess." I tossed it at the Diglett, who was swallowed up inside. It tilted every which way, and I was sure it was going to bust open, but it clicked shut.

"Sweet!" I knelt down, pushing my hand onto the little guy's Ball. "I'm going to call you Leroy."

Xander flapped his wings around me, shrieking loudly. Idiot.

I recalled him, then stepped out of the tunnel, gazing back inside of it. I had yet to go through it, but I didn't like the feel of it. Something wasn't right in there… and I wasn't sure, exactly, what that was.

* * *

Leroy grew levels like lightning in the grass east of Diglett Cave. Trainers sent Ekans against me; he used Dig and uprooted them instantly.

One shorts-sporting Youngster sent out a poisonous pair - Nidoran Male and a Nidorino, both effectively crushed by a heavy wave of earth-rippling Magnitude.

A depressive gambler, his beard touching his chest, clutched a cupful of dice, mourning that he never won. He sent out a pretty Vulpix, sporting six lush red tails; I used Leroy, who destroyed it with Dig.

He retaliated with Growlithe, a cute puppy with an orange tiger-striped pelt and thick white fluff; Leroy sent him flying with a Magnitude, power of 10.

"Jeez, Leroy, if you were anymore of a beast, what would I do?" I said, smiling and patting him on his smooth, bald brown head. He blinked at me.

"Hey, you, get off those wires!" Cried a guy kneeling in the grass near my feet. I glanced down, seeing a dude in a mechanic's outfit, a wrench in one hand.

"How is a wrench going to help you when dealing with wires?" I said, a touch of sarcasm coloring my words.

"…Battle me."

He sent out two Magnemites, both of which were annihilated by two hits of Dig.

"Leroy, my friend," I said, smiling, "I think I've found a permanent member of our team."

"Diglett," he said shrilly, looking pleased at my words.

I looked down at the other three Poke Balls clipped to my belt, a smile on my face.

"Good. Looks like we're ready for the S. S. Anne… and then Lt. Surge."

* * *

**Current Team:**

Charmeleon: "Kashen" - Male, Level 24

Raticate: "Tobias" - Male, Level 23

Golbat: "Xander" - Male, Level 24

Diglett: "Leroy" - Male, Level 23


	12. Well, That's Just Like Me

**Locke and Key:**_ A Nuzlocke Story_

* * *

"Counting all the assholes in the room

Well, I'm definitely not alone. I'm not alone.

You're a liar, you're a cheater, you're a fool;

Well, that's just like me, yoohoo! And I know you, too.

Mr. Perfect don't exist, my little friend, and I tell you that again."

-Volbeat, "Still Counting"; _Guitar Gangsters and Cadillac Blood_

* * *

It was so hard to sleep on the ship. I'm not seasick, by any means – and the boat wasn't even scheduled to move until noon the next day – but the sensation of being on water… it made me uneasy.

I'd battled nearly everyone on the ship, and let me tell you, it was a different experience than I would have guessed. I came onto the ship expecting rich, stuffy old people, sitting quietly in their rooms and sipping herbal tea… but no. The people I encountered were more than ready to sic their Pokemon on me, some of them with Growlithe, some with Nidoran of the male or female variety, others still in sailor outfits with tough Water and Fighting types. I saw women in fancy dress with rugged Pokemon; I saw elderly men in suits with cute but hard to beat Pokemon.

We – my team and I – were exhausted, and fell into our cabin eagerly. There were two beds, a desk, and a bathroom in each cabin, and my Pokemon all piled on one bed. It was kind of cute, really. I watched them get close to one another as I undressed, throwing my filthy traveling clothes on the floor in a neat pile; Kashen, the source of warmth, was in the middle, while Xander, Tobias and Leroy crowded around. None of them fought or growled at one another – they were perfectly united, peacefully dozing.

As I pulled on a loose t-shirt from my bag and slipped it over my bare chest, I pondered the scene. I hadn't ever really _thought_ about how my Pokemon got along with _each other_. They just seemed to tolerate each other because they were on _my_ team, but that was selfish reasoning, huh? Really, they had to do everything together. They relied on each other in battle, especially team battles; they slept near each other, ate by each other, and became each other's company.

_Can they speak each others' language? Is it so different? _I shook my head, smiling at the thought of Kashen needing a translator to talk to Leroy. _Jeez, I think people have a lot to learn about Pokemon if we're ever gonna _really_ understand them._

Made restless by my musings, I kicked back the blankets and rose. Really, it'd been so long since I'd bathed, and wasn't going to waste an opportunity.

Making sure my Pokemon were either asleep or averting their dozing eyes, I threw off my t-shirt and kicked my underwear down my long legs. Before long, the water pressure was drumming against my sore back, the searing hot warmth running down my hair and bare flesh, rinsing it free of loose dust from the roads and twigs from the underbrush.

It was kind of disgusting, really, to see how gross travelling gets you. If I was counting on getting laid somewhere, I'd be sadly mistaken.

While I was in the shower, rinsing away the impurities my travels had stained me with, I thought of Green. How long had it been since I'd seen him? Surely he hadn't gotten invited to the S. S. Anne, being an ordinary rookie trainer?

_Why are you thinking of Green, anyways?_ I thought, slightly bitter. _Especially in the shower. Jeez, Leaf, you getting desperate?_

* * *

The next morning, we were all well-rested, especially me – a _real_ mattress and comforter, by God! It erased a lot of back trouble I'd been having, I'll tell you that much. After exiting the room, we realized we had only another two hours before the ship took off, and skipped breakfast to head straight to the Cut Master's barracks.

Coincidentally, the "Cut Master" was also the captain of the ship.

"Which of you should learn cut, anyways?" I thought aloud, looking at the four miniature balls in my hand – three small red ones and one navy-blue one. "I think only Kashen and Leroy can… hmm, maybe Tobias can, actually…"

"Talking to yourself again? You might wanna get that checked out," called a snarky voice from down the hallway. Naturally, at the pitch Green was yelling, anyone in their rooms could have heard it.

I reddened. _Speak of the goddamn devil_. Strangely, my first thought at the sight of his perfectly tanned, golden-haired, arrogant asshole self was, _Good thing I bathed last night._

"How did you get invited, anyway?" He asked, strolling my way. He was dressed as casually as I was, but somehow he looked put-together. Then again, he always did. Football playing studs were magical like that. No matter how neatly pressed I was, I always looked a little wild and unkempt.

"Huh. I could ask you the same question." I raised an eyebrow, hoping to get an answer from him.

"What part of 'I'm amazing' don't you get, Leaf?" He chuckled. I rolled my eyes.

"What do you want? I'm on my way to the captain's quarters so I can get Cut, and then I'm outta here."

"Same here," he said, taking a small, sleek disc out of his pocket and spinning it around his index finger. "But I just happened to see you on the way out. How 'bout a battle?"

_How did I guess?_

"Sure."

"Gotta make sure you didn't get better than me, you know," Green said, winking in an almost flirtatious manner.

_Jeez, what a slut._

"Right. When have I ever been _not_ better than you?" I glanced at the four Balls in my palm, then chose one, enlarging it in my right hand.

"Go, Pidgeotto!" He called, while I yelled, "Xander, go!"

On his side, the majestic, elegant-looking evolved form of Pidgey lifted a wing and preened. His attitude was similar to Green's, apparently. Seeing it do that, my heart sank a bit. _Aero…_

I shook my thoughts. A darker version of his Flying type flapped its wings heavily on my side, fangs gleaming in the white overhead light.

"Use Quick Attack, Pidgeotto!"

"Bite, Xander."

Pidgeotto flashed close to Xander and struck him in the stomach with its beak, but in retaliation, my blue bat squealed and sank his shadow-powered teeth into his neck and shoulder area.

Green's bird struggled, squawking unpleasantly, while Xander clung to him.

"Gust!" Green called frantically, seeing Pidgeotto losing vitality.

"Come on, Xander, cling to 'im! Use Wing Attack, bash him around a little!" I called, a little fierce. I wasn't going to lose to Green, that's for damn sure.

The bird and the bat struggled together, but then the feathered one managed to get a small twister going that slammed into Xander, almost shrugging him off.

Xander then raised one wing and smacked it heavily into Pidgeotto's black-masked face. It squawked one last time, then collapsed heavily, wings at rest.

"What? No, Pidgeotto… aw, fine." He recalled him, then a glint entered one of his sapphire eyes – a glint I didn't like too much.

"Go, Kadabra!"

This was not the helpless, snoozing Abra I had met before, or owned, even. This was what Yenra had almost become before his death; longer, standing and wide-awake, Kadabra had a long tawny tail, a whiskered, sinister face, and a clawed hand that clutched a slightly twisted spoon. Kadabra had psychic energy radiating off of it, and I worried that Xander shouldn't be out.

Then again… Bite…

I chanced it.

"Xander, use Wing Attack!" I called. I wanted to weaken it before finishing off with a super-effective move. I just had to hope he'd use a similar strategy.

Xander slapped Kadabra heavily with his wing, and the Psychic type looked fiercely into his eyes.

"Disable, Kadabra," Green ordered, smirking my way briefly. My green eyes met his crystalline ones, acid eating into tinted glass. I smirked back at him.

"Xander, Bite!"

Pulling away, Xander dove down, using Bite on Kadabra's shoulder and causing it to flinch in pain and drop his spoon.

"Bite one more time!"

The deal was done; Kadabra and Pidgeotto were out of the way. Squirtle and Rattata had been his other Pokemon last time, but if Abra had evolved…

Green rolled his eyes and pulled out Kadabra's Poke Ball, recalling him. I wasn't sure I liked his attitude, but I didn't egg him on anymore.

"Go, Raticate!"

Yep, how did I know? Similar to Tobias, but smaller and more docile-looking, Green's Raticate chattered senselessly on the field. Not his most intimidating Pokemon, really.

"Xander, return." I recalled my Golbat, then looked at my selection. Hmm…

"Go, Kashen!"

My dragon-like Fire type flashed onto the field, ready for battle. I wasn't worried about Raticate, so I ordered an Ember and a Metal Claw before it was exhausted and stumbling.

Green recalled it.

"Wartortle!"

Ah, so his Squirtle _had_ finally evolved. Instead of a little bald turquoise turtle, Wartortle appeared, with feathered ears decorating his head, a long, pale, fluffy tail curling behind him. His color had darkened into denim, and his shell was thicker and better armored.

Kashen spit fire to the side to show his badassery, but I wasn't quite sure if they should take each other on at this point in time. Wartortle had just come from Misty's gym, so Bubble and Water Gun were probably replaced by Water Pulse…

"We gonna do this, or not?" Green called, sensing my indecision. Kashen turned towards me, and I searched his eyes; then I nodded once, slowly.

"But I _will_ recall you if I need to, Kashen," I said slowly. "Tobias can handle him, too, you know."

"Charr," he scoffed, smiling toothily. I smiled back, then nodded.

"Whatever. You're fucking insane, Kashen, but I love you anyways."

Green blinked, but said nothing.

"Wartortle, use Withdraw!"

Damn! Our only damaging attacks were physical…

"Ember, Kashen!"

Dumb? Maybe…

Kashen spit flames into Wartortle's shell, and, to my gleeful surprise, he made a barking noise of pain. Popping back out, his dark blue skin was singed; Wartortle was burned.

"Okay, Kashen, with that eating at him… Metal Claw!"

Green narrowed his eyes. "Wartortle, Protect!"

Ugh. Spinning a circle of protection around himself, Wartortle watched smugly as Kashen's gleaming claws crashed into the barrier, leaving him unharmed.

"Protect again, Wartortle!"

This time, the forcefield shimmered but failed, and Kashen's metallic claws slammed into Wartortle's face, sending him flying backwards. Fire then ate at his health, and soon it was only a strand of consciousness holding him up. He stumbled, then fell on his back.

Kashen put a foot on his shelled stomach, then, without my order, spit fire into his face. Struggling beneath him, Wartortle coughed, then blacked out, eyes lolling back into his head.

"Return, Kashen," I said, fumbling for his Poke Ball. I didn't like when he used attacks without my orders – it made me feel like I couldn't control him, and I was his trainer, regardless of our mutual friendship. I didn't like unnecessary violence when it came to Pokemon, either.

Green saw my displeasure. "Your Charmeleon is rough," he said, checking his Wartortle, who was still alive, of course, but pretty badly wounded. "Can't you keep it in line?"

"Yeah… but he's kind of stubborn sometimes."

"Maybe if you treated them more like Pokemon instead of people, he wouldn't be," Green snapped back, uncharacteristically angry. Had his loss hit him that hard? Or was he _honestly_ worried for his Wartortle?  
Call me a bitch, but I doubted it.

"Green, I'm sorry, okay? Next time, I'll make sure he's gentle. Don't be so fucking manic. I wouldn't let him _kill_ your Pokemon."

"That reminds me… where's your Sandshrew? Didn't you have one last time we battled?"

I paused, looking up, into his cold gaze. "Yeah. I did. But he's gone now." That's all I could manage to say. Instead, I moved past him, climbing the stairs slowly to the Cut Master's room.

He blinked.

"…Gone? Did—"

"He's not the only one. You know…" I stopped, hand on the rail, when I looked back at him. I wanted to be angry at him, but it wouldn't come. "I just hope you never have to find out."

* * *

Having gotten Cut and battled everyone on the ship, my team and I left just shy of noon. The sun was warm but meaningless on my skin as we trudged back to the Pokemon Center, healing Green's injuries. His words had troubled me, and it was the closest I'd ever come to treating him like someone I could confide in.

It worried me.

_Leaf,_ I thought to myself as Kashen and the others were healed on the nurses' machine, _You don't need anything from Green but a Pokemon battle every now and then. And you should keep it that way._

Some laws are meant to be broken, but not that one. Sometimes a car strays from its path to take meaningless roads, but it always finds the right one in the end.

* * *

"Fuck. This."

Lt. Surge's gym was bullshit.

There were some trainers standing around, but mostly, the room was occupied by row upon row of… trash cans.

Are you hearing this?

_Trash cans_.

In which _I_, the challenger, was expected to dig in to find two switches.

It took me half an hour to find the first switch, and when I did, I couldn't find the second switch.

Which – you guessed it – reset the switches.

"Lady…" said one creepy-looking guy in a sailor suit, "…If you beat me, I'll tell you the secret."

"Deal," I said, pissy and smelling of garbage. I don't know how many Big Mac wrappers and wads of gum I'd gone through.

"Go, Pikachu!"

"Leroy, go!"

The sailor stopped, then scratched his head.

"Uh… Quick Attack?"

The yellow rat attacked Leroy, barely touching his health. I smirked.

"Magnitude!"

Let's just say that battle ended quickly.

"Okay. The second switch is directly next to the first one."

"Next to it meaning… in front of it, behind it, to its left, its right, or diagonal?"

"I dunno."

…The fuck.

When I finally got to Surge, let me tell you: I was going to kick his ass _hard_ just for the trash cans.


	13. Death Makes Us Heroes

**Locke and Key:** _A Nuzlocke Story_

* * *

"Only in death will we have our own names since only in death are we no longer part of the effort. In death we become heroes."

-Chuck Palahniuk

* * *

I found the second switch – and, beneath the yellowed light of the gym, I saw him. Lt. Surge, hair short and spiky, skin tanned, eyes spinning and dark – I approached the gate where he hid, staring in at him.

The gate separated after a moment, revealing a man sitting quietly, contemplating his cursing female challenger. I thought his eyes seemed heavy, like the dark glazing of his iris on top was the murky surface of a deep, cold lake. I remembered what the others in the gym had said – Lt. Surge had fought in the war.

The war – it might mean nothing to you, but in Kanto, about twenty years ago, we had an unnamed war with the Hoenn region over a cause I'm not quite sure of to this day. I wasn't born then, you know, and my mother was loathe to talk about it with me, so what I know is from the history classes I mostly skipped.

Lt. Daniel Surge had been a decorated war hero upon return, but it was clear he was a little messed up in the head afterwards. He'd led a battalion of Electric Pokemon, and I hear his Raichu was in the war with him.

Truthfully, using Pokemon in war is a sick thing to do, in my opinion – but it wasn't just Surge's brigade that had done so. I know he was the only gym leader in Kanto that had fought in the war, but several Hoenn champions had used Pokemon – Water, mostly, as Hoenn is mostly tropical – and Surge had killed many Pokemon.

Perhaps this is what terrified me the most when I approached him. He had seen more Pokemon die than I had, had killed more than I'd met so far in my journey, had experienced the loss of death, the pain of murder. Voltorb and Electrode had served as suicide bombs in his battalion, I know that much, and who would order them to use Explosion but him?

"So," Surge said slowly, running a hand through his short, military-style dusky gold hair. "I hear you've given Brock and Misty a run for their money, girl." His voice was gruff – the way you'd expect a vet's voice to sound.

"Well, I beat them, if that means anything to you," I said, trying to avert my eyes from his. What was he hiding in that smiling head?

"It may. But as you know, Brock and Misty don't have the experience I do… nor the type." At that, he stood, kicking the chair back so it fell over with a _clatter_. I jumped, startled.

"Do you know what an Electric type is, girl?"

"Well… yeah. I'm not stupid." It was hard to be cheeky.

He didn't seem to mind or notice. "Do you? Do you really?" He picked a miniature Poke Ball from his belt, and I willed my legs to stop trembling, to get a grip on myself.

_He's just a man, Leaf; a trainer. That's all. You've faced worse… _But I hadn't. I never would again, in a way.

"Yes," I managed. "It's a Pokemon that uses Electric attacks."

"Wrong. Nidoking can know Thunder – does that make him Electric?" He smiled dreamily, closing his eyes as the Ball in his hand enlarged, ready to release the Pokemon inside. "Raticate can use Thunderbolt. He's not Electric."

"Your point?" I asked, weary.

His eyes opened then – sharp as blades.

"Electric types... they've killed more people than you've met in your life, girl." He smiled - a truly horrific thing, as the smile wasn't right for his cold, angular face.

"Electric types are death."

_Yes… they are._ I remembered my Pidgeotto, struck down by a Pikachu's Thundershock, and I swallowed.

"Are you sure you wish to challenge me?"

I nodded before I could back down. "Yes, I'm sure."

"Fine." He threw the Ball at the ground. "Go, Voltorb."

Emerging from the Poke Ball was a larger sphere, colored similarly. Red on top, white beneath, its eyes looked vicious – or was that my imagination? Another genderless Pokemon. Gah. What was the appeal?

I glanced at my belt, then selected Leroy's Poke Ball. I knew how to win Surge's badge – if only I wouldn't let my guard down.

"Dig dig," cheerfully cried Leroy upon arrival.

Surge must have been used to a trainer seeking Diglett Cave as soon as they came to Vermillion City, as he didn't look either surprised nor worried.

"Voltorb, Sonicboom!"

"Diglett, Dig!"

Before Leroy poked his head under the gym's cracked linoleum floor, blades of air whirled around Voltorb and cut into him. It hurt exactly twenty HP – could be a danger if it struck too many times.

After being hit by Sonicboom, Leroy dug underground, then pounded into the Voltorb. Luckily for me, it fainted. I knew Surge would have ordered it to Selfdestruct, and that would have been disastrous – for both of us.

"Go, Pikachu!"

The round, cuddly-looking yellow rodent appeared, red cheeks sparking.

Ugh. I hate Pikachu with a burning passion, so I relished taking one of the fuckers out. Its cheeks sparked with energy, but none of it would touch Leroy, I knew that. It probably knew that, too, because it noticed Leroy, staring unblinkingly at it, and ceased generating electricity.

"Leroy, Magnitude!"

The earth rumbled, then split powerfully, sending Pikachu down. It was weakened, but not defeated, to my chagrin, and it bolted upright, lightning-fast as any Electric type.

"Quick Attack!" Surge commanded, voice booming.

Speeding into Leroy, the Pikachu weakened my Diglett heavily - something I hadn't expected, I guess. I frantically sought a Potion from my pack, then sprayed him lightly with it, relieved to see him spry again.

"Diglett," he said, narrowing his eyes at the panting Pikachu. _It's close._

"Cut, Leroy!" I called, deciding to finish it off. Truthfully, I wanted to see it bleed.

Whirling, Leroy's spinning sides generated enough speed to make them deadly as blades; he rushed at the Pikachu, splicing into it's small golden shoulder. Blood erupted, flashing into the air and spilling onto the yellowed, dirty floor. The Pikachu didn't cry in pain; it seemed to glare into Leroy's eyes before falling, dazed and exhausted - like its trainer, an assassin to the end.

Surge called Pikachu back, and I grew suddenly afraid. He had only one Poke Ball left. I knew what was in it before he tapped it, enlarged it, then tossed it.

The flash beamed from the split ball, then faded. Left in the brilliance's wake, a taller version of what had just bled on the floor stood before little Leroy. "Raiii," called a sonorous voice; taller than Pikachu, Raichu was a dusky orange color with curling mocha ears, a white belly, dark stripes, dark feet and paws, and a long, scourge-like tail, at the end of which was a lightning-bolt. Raichu's cheeks were pale yellow, not red, and they sparked upon his entrance. Not to use an attack, mind you, as Pikachu had been prepared to do. Raichu was showing Leroy - and me - that he wasn't intimidated.

I tried not to be afraid of it. Its Electric attacks couldn't touch us, after all. But… I'd heard a lot about the damn thing.

And it was a vicious-looking and cold-blooded as Lt. Surge himself.

"Leroy, use Magnitude!" I called.

Leroy prepared to strike the earth, but Raichu was quicker. Surge didn't order him – only watched him with glinting eyes.

Raichu flashed to Leroy with a speed I'd never seen before; demonic power, he used Quick Attack that almost sent Leroy flying into the opposite wall. I was appalled to see his low health. That blow had almost destroyed him.

It was _Quick Attack_, for God's sake!

"Leroy, no! Return!"

I wasn't going to chance it, type advantage or no.

I fumbled for a Poke Ball - really, I had a choice between Charmeleon and Raticate...

"Tobias, go!"

Raticate and Raichu faced each other, both looking maniac in their own ways. Tobias's eyes were lusting blood, as always; Raichu looked as though he'd seen far worse, and could beat him into a pulp easily.

_That fucking Raichu has been in a _war_, Leaf._

I shook my head briefly.

"Tobias, Quick Attack!"

"Raichu, Shock Wave!"

Tobias's quick feet blurred towards Raichu, but he couldn't dodge the blitzkrieg of electricity from Raichu's pulsing yellow cheeks. It seemed to follow him in his attempt to evade it, and it ultimately struck him down.

Surge's laughter crackled as Tobias cried out in pain, struggling to get back to his feet after the attack.

"Shock Wave never misses!"

"No… this is ridiculous…" I couldn't believe that my team was really almost hopeless against Surge, even with a Ground type. But it wasn't my Pokemon who were hopeless, really. It was _me_.

"Ready to give in? If not, Raichu here will blast every single one of your Pokemon into Hell," Surge said, calm expression betraying a hint of excitement. _What…?_

Death excited him? Pokemon death? I could see it - not battle light, but _war_ light. What he'd seen on the faces of men he'd destroyed on the frontlines, and what other men had seen on his face.

"You sick fuck," I muttered, feeling a surge of determination to destroy him. No pun intended.

"Okay, your call." He nodded to Raichu. "Finish him."

"Raiii," his Pokemon agreed, cheeks sparking again.

"Tobias, no." I battled internally, wondering if I should recall Tobias or not. His special defense was my highest, coincidentally. Kashen would be fighting fire with fire, a dangerous game, and Xander would be just plain stupid. Leroy was too weak to battle again…

"Tobias, I have to call you back, buddy. I can't let you do this." I tapped his Poke Ball, about to return him, when he turned back, eyes full of pain from the Shock Wave – but also battle light. Light that Tobias had always had in his eyes.

"Cate," he said, and I remembered something. Soulless eyes, brutal death, young Rockets - a promise.

Whatever you say about me – I will not break my own vows.

"Hyper Fang."

He whirled, teeth gleaming, as he charged for Raichu.

"Raichu, use Thunder Wave!"

A small bolt zapped Tobias, and he stiffened in his place – but it didn't stop his attack. He crunched into Raichu, wearing him down, as I called again –

"Hyper Fang, Tobias!"

More teeth, vicious tearing; Raichu cried out in pain as blood splattered the ground to mingle with Pikachu's. _Not always a silent warrior, eh?_

Surge grit his teeth. "Thundershock!"

The attack danced around Raichu and Tobias, but missed, and I grew hopeful.

"Hyper Fang again, Tobias! This will be the last shot - make it worth it!" My voice grew hoarse at the pitch I was screaming.

"Shock Wave!" Surge cried, desperate.

The tearing, vicious teeth of Tobias drove Raichu onto the ground, but its cheeks shot off one more deft, deadly strike of electricity, which struck Tobias and sent him, too, to the ground.

Whichever one rose would win.

But it didn't seem like either was going to rise.

Surge began to laugh, while I fell to my knees, the tears breaking my mental dam as soon as I hit the ground.

* * *

The waiting room in the Pokemon Center was deserted. It was nearly midnight when the nurse told me that Tobias was gone, but I wasn't hearing her.

If I heard her, I would break.

My thoughts were on Surge, not Tobias, as we both watched our Pokemon fall, bleeding and dying, but neither of us recalled them. Neither of us ran to the center of the field to check our partners – his Raichu, a friend of twenty years, who had fought beside him in war, and Tobias, the first Pokemon I 'd ever caught myself, a friend whose trust I'd had to earn over time, a friend who kept my fighting spirit alive in this endless game of death.

Lt. Surge had handed me the Thunderbadge as I held Tobias's broken, heaving body, and he had congratulated me, eyes swimming, murky, secrets untold in their dark-water depths.

What rotted, lurked, conquered, corrupted in him?

Did I already know?

At that moment, I felt disgust gush through me – disgust for him, for me, for what we were doing, what we were _all_ doing, but it wouldn't stop me. It never would.

"_You'd be a great trainer, Leaf, but your demons are great. You can't ever hesitate. Death is final, but death is great, too – and it will motivate you better than anything else in this world."_

"_Motivate us to what?" I asked, wiping my eyes with my wrist._

_"Don't you get it?" He'd asked, grabbing me by the shoulders. "Death... it makes us into heroes."_

_I stared at him, but his face was blurry. "If you weren't a hero when you were alive, then you won't be a fucking hero when you're dead."_

Now I sat, deep in thought, and Tobias was dead. Was he a hero?

I wasn't sure how deep the curse ran in me – how deep the desire to win was, to prove myself. Deep enough to kill?

Deep enough to destroy?

I was drained of my tears, bled to free myself of the disease that ate away every trainer's intentions, motivations, goals and dreams. But I couldn't get rid of the disease – it was lodged deep in my soul, bred into it, welded like steel and branded, written in blood, a Devil's deed, holding me in his grasp until I served my purpose.

* * *

We lay in the Pokemon Center that night, despite my misgivings. It was quiet, and the sleeping bags they provided us with smelled like mothballs and piss, but I didn't care. My head wasn't in reality for the rest of the night, but it wasn't in dreams, either. It was somewhere in limbo, in purgatory.

Kashen was awake, too, but he didn't look at me or talk to me. I wondered if he was disappointed in me? I always feared his criticism most, but sometimes I just had to accept that my Pokemon didn't think I was God. I wasn't their mother. I was their trainer. I held life and death in each hand, and what that hand chose for me – or them – was never my choice.

As a trainer, a person, or a friend.

Not at first, anyways.

"Kashen… please, say something to me. Say anything. I don't know if I can take anymore of this, and I need someone to help—"

"Charr..meleon," he said slowly, and when he finally turned to me, there were tears in his eyes.

I remembered the day he and I caught Tobias. We had delivered Oak's mail, or whatever it was, and run into the fierce, stubborn little Rattata. I had managed to catch him, and then I held his Poke Ball, looking to Kashen for approval as I spoke his name: "Tobias."

Kashen had put his claw onto the Poke Ball, and declared, "Charmander!"

_I approve. Tobias - our new partner._

A bond, a pact. I remembered the two of them sleeping on my lap while we looked at the stars, trying to sleep in the wild again. The two of them helping me battle Team Rocket, along with Xander. Fighting Green the second time, with his Pidgey, the third time, when he had Pidgeotto, Abra and Rattata, and the fourth time, all of them evolved and ready for battle.

I didn't know Pokemon could cry, but Kashen's tears startled me - and touched me - deeply.

"Kashen… I'm so sorry," I whispered, and I reached out to hug him.

Was any apology - to myself or to my Pokemon - ever enough? It felt empty as it hung in the air - empty words, empty promises. Lies.

Thank God, he let me hold him. He fell into my embrace, and his tears dampened my arm – little beads of liquid silk, drops of starlight, the embodiment of sorrow, tears so pure and frail that they were rumored to bring back the dead. I held Kashen tightly, feeling the warmth of his Fire-type skin, and I tried not to cry anymore.

"You were friends, too. I know. But what you don't know, Kashen, is that I made a promise to Tobias. I promised him that I'd let him die with fire in his soul, in his eyes. I promised him that… we'd both go down fighting."

"Charr?" He asked, raising his eyes, silvered with grief in the moonlight that poured in through the Pokemon Center's window.

I was miserable, broken inside, like I was full of glass and had just been battered by a hammer. But as I watched the shadows dance against the walls, I attempted a smile.

"I still have to keep my half of the promise."


	14. Pressure

**Locke and Key:**_ A Nuzlocke Story_

**A/N: **Short chapter, I know. The next one will be longer. I just had a lot of school work. Anyways, hope you enjoy what I happen to have. :)

* * *

All this pressure is eating me up inside  
And I feel like I'm being buried alive again  
All this pressure is tearing me up inside  
And the fear of failing is on my mind again  
The anxiety's building up inside  
And the thought of losing is running strong again  
And I pace and smoke and tell you,  
If it's over, it's over, and that's not my problem.  
It's not all my fault; you fucked with my heart.

-Rains, "Pressure"; _Stories._

* * *

You could say Tobias's death was a turning point in my trainer journey, but let me tell you right now – it wasn't the biggest one.

Nonetheless, the one or two days after winning Lt. Surge's gym badge and losing my Raticate, I was a fucking _mess_. And not in the crying, sniffling, depressive, attempting suicide way, like you'd perhaps expect from a grieving trainer after losing their second Pokemon.

The night after Tobias died, I went straight out into the tall grass where I'd trained Leroy, east of Diglett Cave. My team, saddened as well, looked at me in puzzlement as I sent them all out. Determination and a touch of insanity had crawled into my veins; there wasn't any rational thought in my head. Just a drive, a virus – to seek and destroy, as I had been sought and destroyed myself.

Kashen, Xander and Leroy – three Pokemon once again. A curse I'd identified as mine – a curse of death and loss, but mine all the same.

Mine because of that, maybe. Who knew?

The three of them looked at me, curious, but I wasn't about to converse with them, or explain myself. How could I explain myself to them when I had no idea how to read my thoughts?

On trainers I challenged again using the VS Seeker, and on wild Pokemon in the grass, we trained until sundown.

I could see Kashen growing weak from the Poliwag he'd battled; Bubble had blistered his skin, but all I did was spritz Potion on his scarlet skin. Xander was almost taken down by a Magnemite's Thundershock, so I switched to Leroy. Leroy fell prey to a Bellsprout's Sleep Powder, then was lashed with a Vine Whip.

Dangers.

Dangers everywhere, lurking in the shadows, behind every corner; dangers to life, to sanity. I carried Potions, I strengthened my team, but the truth was beginning to wear on me.

You couldn't escape death.

We fell to the ground as the sun bloodied the sky and darkened the tall grass, Kashen glaring into my face with fierce, cold blue eyes - all I noticed besides the soreness in my own legs.

Xander and Leroy leaned against each other, the Golbat's wings weakened from Wing Attacks, Leroy sagging against him from Scratching and Digging himself into exhaustion.

"Return, Leroy," I said, deadpan, holding the patterned blue and purple Great Ball out. He was sucked into it, looking grateful for a reprieve.

"Return, Xander." In turn, Xander closed his eyes in relief as he was sucked into the Poke Ball in turn.

I turned to Kashen, who was still glaring at me.

"Well? Are you going to bed, or not?" I snapped. My voice was harsh, probably because of the all-too-human look in his eyes. A look I couldn't quite identify, but that I knew was there, scorning me.

"Charr," he growled, a low sound rumbling grittily in his throat.

"No? Fine. Stay out here, then."

I noticed him puff a scrap of heat, but otherwise remain silent. I sighed, leaned back on my hands, then felt a nudge from the waistband of my skirt. A rumpled pack of cigarettes, which I certainly reached into after the prodding.

My long fingers with their dirty, chipped nails pulled out a single white cylinder. One last cigarette before I had to use money – valuable money, no doubt – to attempt to get more. Money that should have been spent on Potions, Paralyz Heals and Repels.

I tried not to think about my responsibilities as a trainer. Instead, I tipped the end of the cigarette into Kashen's tail flame to light it.

"Meleon!" He snapped, whirling around and baring his teeth at me. I had managed to light it, but the swipe of his angry paw tore into my wrist, which made me cry out.

Three thin but freely bleeding welts gleamed in the faded orange dusk. I looked up, shocked, into his eyes – burning coldly blue, like Green's eyes, like an angel warrior's, eliminating foes with righteous fire. They were so _human_ in their indignation. Indignation for dipping my poison of choice into his tail flame, or something more?

"You _scratched_ me?" I asked, stunned, watching a thin droplet of red lace down my narrow, bony wrist and leave a browning trail. "For lighting my cigarette with your tail?"

"Charr, charmeleon!" He used the claws he'd torn my wrist with – blood dark against their smooth white in the fading light – and slashed at my other hand, which held a trembling, newly lit cigarette.

It was sliced in half, and the burning point dove into the grass around our meager campsite. I pulled my rough blanket away, staring as it singed black marks into the yellow field grass.

"Charr," Kashen said, quietly, this time his voice sobered enough for me to look up sharply.

"That was my _last_ cigarette," I cried, my voice high, grating even to my own ears. "_Do you realize what you've done?_"

"Meleon…"

He sounded threatening, holding up his bloodstained claw again. I was prepared to strike him, which I'd never before thought of doing, then looked wildly for the burning cigarette again. This time, he caught my gaze; Kashen stamped on the end of it, extinguishing the flame-kissed tip.

I dove for it, trying to salvage the nicotine, formaldehyde, cyanide, poison, toxic, death, attempting to inhale the curling smoke which faded into the blended scent of sunset.

"I should kill you! You hit me, and now you take my cigarette? How am I going to _sleep_ tonight without that!"

Kashen looked into my eyes – a direct stare – and said, calmly, "Meleon."

The message I got – _They're bad for you._

"Since when have any of you cared about my health?" I snapped, tears in my eyes and flooding my voice.

"Charmeleon."

Ignoring him now, I sank to my knees, fingering the remains of my cigarette, and the dam broke – the mental dam of exhaustion, of self-hatred, of guilt, of regret, of sorrow. It broke, and my tears felt like acidic salvation, burning my pride but releasing my pain.

"My… last… one…" I sobbed brokenly, clutching clumps of long brown hair to my scalp.

"Charr," Kashen murmured softly, reaching out with his bloodied claw to touch my shoulder. It stained my pale shirt, I know that, but it wasn't a sign of gore or of violence to me after that. It was care. Protection. Friendship. A twisted sign, perhaps, but a sign nonetheless – a symbol of our mired souls.

We both knew I wasn't crying about the cigarette. We also both knew that it was the last one I'd ever smoke – that my Pokemon would see, anyways.

* * *

_Please pick up._

_Please._

"Hello?" An aide's chipper voice rang out. "This is Professor Oak's office. What can I do for you?"

Relief washed through me. I smiled and winked at Kashen, who looked pleased.

"Hey, this is Leaf Brannigan. I need to speak to the Professor."

"Uh… who?"

"Just tell him. He'll know who I am." _Hopefully._

"Just one moment, please."

A rustling sound – muffled voices – then, a sharp voice after a precise clearing of the throat, "Hello, Leaf."

"Professor. Hey. I… I wanted to talk to you about something." My legs knocked together once, but I braced myself. No more weakness. No more shame. _Don't lie to yourself. Or him._

"Clearly. What it is you needed, Leaf?" He wasn't sarcastic or impatient, just mildly authoritarian. I didn't mind the tone in his voice; I needed something more important than me, something bigger than me - someone I could look up to instead of protecting or failing to protect.

"Have… have any of your Pokemon ever… have they…" my voice broke. "What I mean is… well…"

There was a brief pause.

Then, Oak said, significantly gentler in tone, "I'm sorry, Leaf. How many?"

I felt moisture invade my vision, but instead of brushing it away, I let it mill there, dance there, release tension in my throat.

"So many. Too many. But any is too many, Professor Oak."

Another pause. Then, I almost whispered, counting backwards in my head. _Tobias. Marlen. Aero. Yenra. Tradden. Grigori. "_Six of them."

"Do you have time?" Professor Oak said after a brief silence.

"All the time in the world." I was so relieved.

To have someone _care_.

* * *

Diglett Cave wasn't nearly so intimidating the second time around. With an arsenal of Flying and Ground, I was more than prepared to wander the tunnels, searching for the light indicating the end.

It was much draftier than Mt. Moon, and the Pokemon weren't hidden in the shadows; they shuffled about underground and poked their heads up to attempt to trip me. The little fuckers really pissed me off, because they were clearly doing it on purpose.

The only reason I was only in Diglett Cave again was to get to the other side and back again. After my conversation with Professor Oak the night before, he had paused, then offered me a gift from his aide on Route 3: HM05 Flash. Which, apparently, I needed in Rock Tunnel later on in my journey.

"Leroy, take him out with Magnitude," I said craftily. The Dugtrio – a rare treat – was underground, and with Leroy's powerful earth pulse, it went flying out, fainted in one blow.

"Good job, buddy," I said, gleefully petting his bald little head.

"Diglett," he said cheerfully, then randomly flashed white. My eyes grew round, as his one bald head turned into three bald heads, and his cheerful eyes drew inwards, with fiercer expressions.

"Trio trio trio," all three heads echoed in a militaristic style.

My eyes glowed, I'm sure of it.

"Leroys. Wow."

* * *

Returning through the cave after getting HM05, I used Xander instead of Leroy, and as I took out the few Diglett who bothered me with Wing Attack and Bite, I realized that the empty hole in my team was slowly vacuuming us all in.

_A black hole, drawing all of our matter to shred us into an empty oblivion._

I turned to stare into the quiet, eerie tunnel as I began to climb the ladder leading me to Vermillion City once again.

"Time to fill the space," I murmured to myself.

* * *

Thinking back on it, as I strolled back to Cerulean City, I realized I wouldn't have gotten moving if I hadn't called Oak. But I couldn't attribute everything to the Professor. It was also the Pokemon he'd given me, the once-trusting, now-resilient Charmeleon he'd presented me with as a baby when I had first gone to his lab, caught smoking and littering.

It was funny, how my Pokemon's personalities had grown from generic wild Pokemon personas to individuals. Kashen had gone from obedient and cool-headed to aggressive, fierce, and protective. Xander had once been insanely crazy and hyper, but as a Golbat, he'd adjusted to his larger size and wingspan and had settled down, now merely watchful and unconcerned with the rest of us. Leroy – ah, my darling Leroy – he had been cute and cheerful, and maybe he still was. The look on my Dugtrio's three faces was no longer blank and sweet, but intimidating and ready for battle.

Tobias… he'd changed, too. He hadn't trusted any of us, least of all me, but after gaining his dependence, he'd fought for_ me and the team_ instead of for himself. He'd gone from a wild Pokemon to a resilient, tough member of my Pokemon party.

But now he was gone, nothing but a gem of a memory, buried beneath the layers of the other dead souls I'd lost. Who knows what cute Grigori would have become? Sweet Tradden, quiet Yenra, confident Aero, feisty Marlen? If there was an afterlife – for humans, Pokemon, or both – I hoped they'd grow there, even though I wouldn't see or know their development.

However, as I came back to the city of my lost innocence, I realized that it no longer mattered. Those Pokemon would always stay with me – and, yes, the guilt from their deaths would drill into me forever – but I wasn't the type to dwell on my own mistakes. Those were what peeked from the dark waters of my dreams, nipped my bare, cold, wet toes in the murk, slithered against my ankles – those were the creatures of nightmares.

But when I was awake, they were nothing but a whisper.

"Rock Tunnel is east. Leroy, ready for cutting?" I asked, forcing a smile down at him. He looked pleased to be used again.

"Trio!" He called, voices mingling.

"Then let's go."


	15. Down in the Badlands

**Locke and Key:** _A Nuzlocke Story_

A/N: As always, thank you, everyone who reviewed! The next chapter will be a big one, so I'm sort of having to divide the events between this one and the next one - hence, the slightly shorter chapter. Hope you enjoy it, anyways. :)

* * *

"Down in the badlands she was savin' her best for last,  
It only hurt when I laugh. Oh, gone too fast.  
California, rest in peace;  
Simultaneous release.  
California, show your teeth;  
She's my priestess, I'm your priest, yeah, yeah."  
- Red Hot Chili Peppers, "Dani California"; _Stadium Arcadium_.

* * *

The call to my mother, I admit, was long overdue. Ever since Professor Oak had helped me out by giving me Flash, I'd been thinking about her. After all, she had no idea about anything that had happened in my journey, and I hadn't talked to her in a week or so – since defeating Brock. And since then, my team had grown, flexed, become more like a family.

I finally made up my mind. As my Pokemon were being healed by the nurses in the Pokemon Center in Cerulean City, I picked up the public telephone and dialed my home phone number. My mother picked up on the first ring. She sounded exhausted.

"Hello?"

"Mother, it's me. Leaf."

She perked. "Leaf? Oh, Leaf, I'm glad to hear from you. It's so early, though. Why are you up at 4:30 in the morning?"

4:30? I glanced around, noticing, for the first time, that the warm, homey Pokemon Center was basically barren. One random guy lounged on the couch, counting some bills with trembling tweaker's hands, but other than that, no other "customers" milled around.

I laughed sheepishly. "Sorry. You kind of get used to being on your feet at all times, when you're a trainer. My sleep schedule's screwed to hell."

"It never was that regular, hon." She sounded amused. "Anyways, how are you? Where are you?"

I was glad she sounded interested – for the second time in a few days, I felt loved again. I filled her in briefly with inane details, such as gaining new badges and new gadgets, filling up the PokeDex Professor Oak had given me, and battling weird trainers all over Kanto.

Finally, she asked the obvious question.

"Last time you called, you had two Pokemon. Charmander and Rattata, right? So who else is on your team?"

I paused. "Well, you remember Kashen – my Charmander. He's a Charmeleon now, and he's really strong. He's still my favorite, but don't say that outloud." She chuckled. "I also have a Golbat, Xander. I caught him in Mt. Moon. He's _crazy_ hyper. Then I have Leroy, a Dugtrio, and he's pretty much the powerhouse of my team."

She was quiet.

"So, Tobias… did you release him?"

"No, Mother. Tobias is dead," I said, voice flat. "He died in Lt. Surge's gym."

She stayed silent for a few minutes, and the gaping emptiness across the line crept into my soul.

I said nothing to break it, however.

"Then he wouldn't have been the only one who's died, will he?" She asked.

"No. He isn't. But… why talk about it anymore? If you want to know anything else, just ask Oak."

"You talked to him before me?" Hurt, now. Pissed. "Leaf…"

"I know, I know. I don't want to hear it. He ended up being a smart choice in the end."

"Over your own mother? I could have helped you out, Leaf. I could have—"

"I figured you didn't want to hear it. Anyways, I have to go. My Pokemon are healed, and I have to make it to Rock Tunnel before noon today if I want to reach Lavender soon. So, bye."

Before I could cut her off, she said, flatly, "Then I guess you won't be calling me again."

I had to tell the truth.

"I don't know. Don't count on it. But I might."

_Click._

Dead silence.

* * *

Maybe I didn't treat my mother the right way, but I was irked.

So what? Wouldn't you be, too, if you'd just had a scab reopened by someone who had no idea how it got there, and never would?

My mother didn't approve of the trainer's life, I know that. And Tobias's death was only reaffirmation, but did I care? No. Was I about to quit now? No. They didn't die for nothing.

And earlier, in my thinking, I realized I'd been right. Staring out the cold glass window into the colder ash-colored sky, I realized that my Pokemon - dead or alive - had been more of a family to me than I'd ever had. Caring more for me than any human ever had even pretended to, and me giving back in return to the best of my ability - we were support for each other, strength, salvation. I could pretend like Kashen, Leroy and Xander were machines. I could pretend like my fallen Pokemon weren't going to reside forever in my mind as heroes.

But I couldn't pretend. Reality - seeing it and facing it, and even embracing it - had always been something I'd found no comfort in, but truth, and I will always favor the truth.

* * *

The sky was dark, still, a flat slate color, as I made my way through the city. On the eastern side, where the sun was beginning to peak above the horizon, a spot of blood, a trail led to the unknown, to darker waters.

I could see a thicket of thorns wrapped around an old, withered tree, planted deep in my path. I picked the Great Ball from my hip, chose Leroy.

"Trio trio trio!"

"Cut, Leroy," I said, and he whipped around, clawless, shredding the thick trunk with little effort. "Alright, good. Let's just keep going. If I know anything, I know trainers will be around here somewhere."

As if on cue, one spotted me.

A girl in a camper's outfit stood off to the side, having just watched my Dugtrio eliminate the offending tree, and smiled in response.

"Wanna battle?" She questioned, nodding to Leroy.

I couldn't resist, naturally.

"Go, Bellsprout!" She called. A long-limbed, thin vine-like creature stood before us, wavering around unsteadily. Atop it's thin neck was a larger bell-shaped yellow head with gaping pink mouth. Leaves stood for arms.

Ugly thing, but I'd always sort of liked Bellsprout's evolution line.

"Go, Xander!" I called, ignoring Leroy's disappointed expression. Ground type versus a high-leveled Grass Pokemon? That thing probably knew Vine Whip, at least. No. I'm not _that _stupid, whatever else I am.

"Golll," cried Xander, flapping heavy wings. He shook his tongue at the camper's ugly Grass type, rolling his eyes back in his head like the insane.

"…Okay. Wing Attack."

Xander flew for the Bellsprout and knocked it back in one blow. Not surprising; Xander was quite strong by this time, and he was a hazard to any Grass type with his dual Poison and Flying types.

"Hmph.. Go, Oddish," she called.

The little blue plant, its hair consisting of long green ferns, looked cutely up at Xander, trying to look fierce, I guess.

"Wing Attack."

This time, though, Xander's heavy-winged blow missed, and the Oddish danced around him, leaves trembling with a blissfully sweet aroma.

A pink cloud enveloped Xander. Sweet Scent. He moved against it sluggishly, obviously enjoying the aroma.

"Okay, Oddish, use Sleep Powder!"

Blue dust, this time; Xander was stricken, and immediately collapsed in a heap of snoozing vampire bat.

Great.

"Xander… wake up!" I shouted.

Nope.

"Oddish, Absorb!"

A weak green energy zapped Xander slightly of health, but it was so weak that it wasn't even worth worrying about.

"Seriously, Xander?"

I was loathe to use an Awakening - call me stingy, but that shit's expensive - but I finally took one out and spritzed my sleeping Golbat with the mixture. His eyes flew open, the crazy spark back in their depths, and he rose to the sky again, wings beating powerfully.

"Wing Attack!"

Xander dove, and his move sent the Oddish flying. A quick victory – or it would have been, had Xander not taken a little nap.

After collecting my prize money, I stood back, mouth agape, as Xander began to glow.

_What?_

There was little I knew about Johto evolutions, having been raised in Kanto. I knew the scientists there had figured out that some Kanto Pokemon come from babies, and that some, being provoked the right way, could evolve into further forms.

Golbat was one of them, but Crobat was difficult to achieve for a young trainer. Zubat was perilously hard to train in the first place, and a Golbat was a good enough reward.

Regardless, I knew as I saw the white fire of evolution envelop Xander that he had grown to love me.

Tears pricked my eyes… when he stopped.

Frustrated, Xander met my eyes, confusion deep in their depths. I guess he was prepared for evolution, too, and I could hardly blame him. It was a chance to get stronger, to mature more quickly... and after he had mentally prepared himself for change, it randomly stopped.

"Gol gol?"

I was slightly frustrated myself. Despite the fact that I loved Xander the way he was, there's no denial - Crobat's a damned powerful Pokemon.

"I'll ask Oak about this later," I mumbled, returning him to his Poke Ball. "He'll know what the problem is."

* * *

Trainer battles ensued. Slowpokes fell prey to Xander's Bite, Geodude and Onix to Leroy's Magnitude, Gloom, Venonat and Beedrill to Kashen's fire. I wasn't worried anymore about other field trainers – we seemed to have it going just fine.

However, we still had two problems. Flying types and Water types. Bird Pokemon were neutral, but their speed made them hard to hit first, and sometimes put my own Pokemon in peril. Water types – well, I had two weaknesses to them already, and Xander sometimes grew tired after battling so many.

This issue was to be solved as I came upon a new patch of grass – one close to the river and partially fenced in.

Expecting Spearow or Meowth again, I instead walked into the small patch of tall grass and found a small bomb rolling towards me.

Having seen only one before – in Lt. Surge's gym – I still had to squint to try and remember it's name. Volbeat? No, Voltorb. It was a sphere, resembling the average Poke Ball, red on the top half of its body, white on the bottom half. Slightly bigger than a Ball, but still relatively small, I knew they had been used as grenades in the war.

Maybe you think that's cruel, but think of it this way: Voltorb, like Staryu and Magnemite, are genderless Pokemon. Therefore, it's easier to disregard their emotion. Maybe it sounds stupid, but they're creepy and mechanical. It just happens.

"Vol. Torb," it seemed to growl in an airy voice of static.

Definitely creepy. But it was the first Pokemon I'd run into, and, anyways, it could certainly learn Flash – a problem I'd been worried about.

"Okay. Go, Leroy," I commanded, sending out my Dugtrio. He wasn't going to attack the little sphere, as they would cause it to faint almost immediately, but he was immune to any of its Electric attacks.

Imagine my surprise when it used Sonicboom – cutting exactly 20 HP off of Leroy.

I couldn't waste time.

I used a Great Ball, hoping it'd contain it without any troubles – but, naturally, it broke free.

"Goddamn it."

I just threw another one, and, luckily, this time, it tilted, clicking shut.

"Yay. Voltorb."

I wasn't particularly excited, but I picked the Great Ball up, examined it, and chose it's name randomly:

"Flitz. Your name is Flitz."

Leroy looked puzzled.

"No criticism. I make my own names."

* * *

Flitz, to my great surprise, didn't _know_ any Electric attacks. I was at a loss, truly, until, while digging out the disc that held Hidden Move Flash, I found one I'd gotten from Surge's gym.

_Shock Wave._

The move that had killed Tobias.

I held the yellow disc, staring at the way the early sun glinted off of it. Death was entombed inside. Heavyweight memories. Tombstones.

Despite the bad feelings I was getting from it, I charged it, loading it into the brain of my new Voltorb.

So, Flitz now knew Shock Wave, Sonicboom, Screech and Flash. Not too bad.

"Time to train, little buddy," I said, blinking away the tears threatening to emerge.

Flitz wasn't Tobias's replacement, not even close. But it sure as hell was starting to feel that way.

* * *

Spearow were easy prey, as were Pidgey. I wish I had a fishing rod, to use Magikarp, Poliwag and Goldeen, too, but alas, I had to stick to land Pokemon. Flitz had incredible speed, and his ability – Soundproof – made me fall in complete love.

Just as I was about to enter the cave, a lass approached me, her short skirt swishing about her tanned upper thighs.

"A battle?" She questioned lazily.

"Sure."

Flitz needed training, anyways, right?

I used my new Voltorb, while the lass unleashed a Clefairy, fluffy, pink, cute as ever.

"Use Sonicboom!" I commanded sharply, and discs of air shot toward the plushy pink ball. It precisely sliced the Clefairy's HP, weakening it for the deathblow.

The lass smirked. A sly look.

"Sing, Clefairy!" She called.

A sweet lullaby filled the air as the little puff ball sang her heart out, but Flitz sat there, unaffected.

"Nice try," I said, smug.

"What?" She appeared outraged – and worried. With good reason, might I add.

"Soundproof, honey. Flitz, Shock Wave!"

A bolt of inescapable electricity pounded the sky, then shot down, electrifying the lass's sweet little Clefairy.

Down and out.

"Go, Pikachu," she said, letting loose the little yellow mouse.

Hmm. Electric vs. Electric.

"Flash, Flitz!"

Blinding light pulsed into the Pikachu's eyes, while the lass called out, "Tail Whip!"

Stat-weakening moves flew back and forth, until finally Flitz used Sonicboom – three times. The Pikachu's Quick Attacks missed, due to its blinded accuracy, and I was left with the prize money.

"Wow, Flitz," I said, looking down on him, "You're not half-bad. You know that?"

"Voltorb," he answered emotionlessly.

Maybe I'd end up liking him, after all.

* * *

I entered the cave.

...and, as expected, it was pitch-black.

I couldn't see my fucking _hands_ in front of my face, okay?

Luckily, Flitz took care of that, illuminating the black depths easily. After the shadows were cleared away, there was not much to see. It was similar to Mt. Moon, but more spacious. Trainers still milled about, wild Pokemon snuck around, and battles still commenced.

And, my luck, the first Pokemon I ran into was a useless one.

"Geo," said the floating rock, fists pumped.

"Eh."

You never know when you might need an HM Slave, and Geodude could learn Rock Smash and Strength, so I caught him and named him Frederick.

After that, I brushed my hair from my eyes – hair that needed to be washed, bad – and furthered deeper into the cave, ignoring the foreboding pit in my stomach.


	16. 50,000 Tears

**Locke and Key:** _A Nuzlocke Story_

* * *

"Now I will tell you what I've done for you;  
Fifty thousand tears I've cried.  
Dreaming, deceiving, and bleeding for you,  
And you still won't hear me.  
I'm going under."  
-Evanescence, "Going Under"; _Fallen._

* * *

Frederick just kind of sat in the back of my party, another Poke Ball beside two Great Balls, a sphere I likely wouldn't touch for anything but necessary use – like Hidden Machines. My team – four Pokemon once again, five if you counted the Geodude I'd caught as a default – was strong enough to probe into the cave.

Or.. so I thought.

Anyways, Zubats plagued me after I'd caught Frederick, so I used Flitz. Immune to Supersonic and with a never-failing Electric attack, he blasted them all away, his levels soon matching those of Kashen, Leroy and Xander.

"Flitz, one more level before you're caught up!" I said, stroking his round head. Smooth, cool, he was still so _robotic_ to me, and it creeped me out, yeah, but I still had a new adoration with him. His speed was wicked, and he was a huge help right now, when my team needed building after Tobias's death.

"Torb," he agreed, narrowing his already angry-looking eyes.

"I guess I'm back in the game."

* * *

We hadn't traveled too far into the cave when a hiker approached us, in his heavy climbing gear and with several Poke Balls clipped to his belt. He ran a hand through his shaggy, dark beard, and revealed a slow smile.

Creep.

"Hey, girl. I see you have Pokemon with you." He nodded towards Flitz, who was rolling by my feet as I walked.

"Obviously."

"Would you like to battle?" He didn't wait for my inevitable answer. Instead, he chose a Geodude – simple enough, right?

"Go, Leroy!" I called. No way would I use Flitz against this guy – that was inevitably a bad plan.

Leroy whirred, "Trio trio trio!" This battle was going to be _too_ easy.

…And that's where I was wrong.

"Leroy, Dig!" I called. Plunging his three heads underground, Leroy ducked under, already darting towards the Rock type.

The hiker's eyes – beady and dark – nonetheless glinted.

"Magnitude, Geodude!"

Panic flared up inside of me. My God, how could I have been so fucking stupid?

"Leroy, come up! Come out _now_!" I heard myself scream, running over to prevent the inevitable. But even under my own sneakered feet, the ground began to pulse. With a Magnitude attack of 8, I went crashing down face-first into the rock floor of the cave, my hands clutching the mounds of dirt that Leroy had kicked up.

"_Leroy!_"

My wail echoed inside the close confines of the shadowy cave. The hiker stepped back, holding his belly while he laughed. The Geodude at his side remained expressionless, a tool, a statue.

"…Trio," coughed a voice, smoke still curling from a fire snuffed. I crawled on my throbbing knees to where I heard him, reached delicately with wavering arms into the hole in the ground, withdrew my shaking Dugtrio. Eyes that had first, as a Diglett, been innocent and sweet, then, as a Dugtrio, became fierce and determined, now were emptying of their warmth, of their heat. Of their life.

"Leroy, my God, I'm so fucking sorry for being stupid. I… I hope you can hear me."

"Trio, trio, trio," he managed painstakingly, as though his throat were filled with shards of glass that cut his mouth with even his last bloodied words. He then stilled in my arms. Sand continued to trail into my cradled hands, onto my bare legs, prickled with gooseflesh.

Death had chilled me once again.

Instead of looking at him any longer, still and cold, gone forever, I found his Poke Ball – the empty Great Ball at my belt – and recalled him, feeling it grow cold and gray the moment I returned him.

I sat, now empty of Leroy forever, staring brokenly at the place where I'd retrieved his dying body. His strength, happiness, cute face – that was the memory I'd wanted to save, but instead, I'd forever be left of the hands filled with grit as I'd pulled him from his tomb underground.

My stupid mistake – like with Aero. I closed my eyes, not willing to see the place of his death anymore.

Breaking me from my silent, sorrowful reverie, the hiker's booming voice crashed into my rainstorm, aggressive, murderous thunder – looking to strike again.

Over my dead fucking body.

"You going to finish this battle, or are you afraid that I'll do that to all of your Pokemon?"

"Oh, I'm going to finish this battle, you shit. You can count on it." I stood, shaking, dusting my knees off. "I'm going to annihilate your Pokemon, _especially_ that one." I pointed accusingly at the hiker's Geodude, who looked emotionlessly on.

"Then send out your next Pokemon," he said cruelly.

At his words, I paused, then glanced at my belt. Three again.

Wait. No. I had four Poke Balls there – well, one Great Ball – and I tentatively reached for the newest addition to my belt.

It was warm with life, and I plucked it, letting it fill my palm.

"Go, Frederick!" I cried, my vendetta curling lustfully inside of me. All I was seeing was red - which, admittedly, is better than black and blue.

Another Geodude, this one smaller, angrier-looking, was released. I hadn't given him a chance, until now.

This was Frederick's chance to prove himself.

Did he know that?

Did I?

"Magnitude," I sharply commanded, anger pulsing through me as I watched him slam his stone fists into the earth.

The shock wave traveled into the other Geodude, sending him flying into the rock wall of the cave and – hopefully – shattering him, sending him into a Hell my Leroy was surely far from.

Frederick turned to me, eyes not resentful, but sympathetic. "Geo," he said, pulling himself up from the ground and returning to float in the air. "Geodude."

Was he consoling me? He was but a tool of my revenge, yet he was trying to help my aching. Instant compassion flooded me, and, despite the situation, despite the loss and the hurt, a smile touched a corner of my lips.

"Hey, this ain't over!" The hiker called, two other Poke balls in his hands. "There's more where that'un came from!"

I met Frederick's eyes, and I nodded.

"Bring it on," I heard myself say.

* * *

The sun was already setting again when I buried Leroy's Poke Ball outside.

"I was going to wait until I could go back to Diglett's Cave," I said slowly. Kashen's claws, dirty, reached up to touch me on the bare arm, and I looked at him with tears in my eyes. Not going to fall again.

"Gol, gol," Xander mourned, pulling one long wing over his eyes. "Golbat…"

Xander had lost another close friend. Leroy to him was Tobias to Kashen, and I realized that after a moment, putting a heavy hand between his small ears.

Flitz and Frederick – still outsiders in our small, closed-off world – looked on at a short distance, my Voltorb looking bewildered, naive, and Frederick looking solemn, respectful.

"…But I know it wouldn't have mattered to you. This was your real home, Leroy; with us. And this is where we parted. So, goodbye."

There was just nothing else to say.

But as I returned my team, one by one – somber Kashen, grieving Xander, confused Flitz – I paused, looking at Frederick.

"Hey. I want you to know something." He looked at me, crossing his stone arms across his 'chest' in a humane expression of defensiveness. I shook my head softly.

"I don't know where I'd be without you now. I'm not gonna lie to you. I wasn't going to use you for shit. I just caught you because I had to. But… now? That's all going to change. And not just because you avenged Leroy's death, or because you're half Ground. Because you were there. And I appreciate that more than you'll ever know."

My speech hung in the air, rain drops caught on strands of spiderweb, when Frederick seemed to smile slowly.

"Geo, Geodude," he confirmed, reaching a hand out.

He wanted to shake hands? A human gesture, but perhaps not. Perhaps it meant something similar for Pokemon, a pact of peace, of friendship, of forgiveness.

It meant a lot to me, that I know for sure – the weight of his powerful golem's fist, capable of crushing my small, nail-bitten hand to a pulp – cooling the heat of my own fingers, delicately letting me know that he was a true team member now.

"I'm going to have to do some serious level grinding with you, you know? Level 16… the others are level 28." I laughed to myself, and he joined, accepting my offer of companionship.

* * *

I did train Frederick. He grew to level 21 before I decided to call it quits for the night. Sucking him back into his Poke Ball, I exited the cave again, this time going into the Pokemon Center conveniently sitting outside. Setting my Pokemon in the trays the nurses set out, I sat on the empty bench, looking at my hands.

Then I remembered something.

Digging in my back pack, I found something. Crippled, crushed, but still entirely useable – a cigarette.

Kashen was in his Poke Ball. The others wouldn't know. Would they even care?

I needed something, a tourniquet for my open wound, lithium for my agony.

I left the Pokemon Center, lounging outside, inhaling long and hard on my one cigarette. Old, stale smoke filled my mouth and nostrils, but it's scorching was so sweet, the taste of ash so delicately delicious on my tongue and in my broken lungs.

I was letting the smoke coil deep inside me, take the pain Leroy's death had left by the root. Then I was rushing it out of me, pulling away the vines along with the poison.

A suicide solution, I know, but it was working, by God. And I use whatever works.

The stars glowed palely above me. I watched them as my insides burned away, my insecurities and my rage, watched the clouds mesh between and around them.

I'm not going to give you any bullshit here. I don't think Leroy was 'up in the sky, a star himself' – I believe in souls, but I don't believe in that shit. Leroy was dead, and I knew it. I'd never see him in the flesh again, never see him in the waking world – maybe not even otherwise.

But I knew his soul was somewhere.

And that comforted me.

Somewhat.

_Bye, Leroy. I might see you again when I'm dead, when I'm dreaming, and I might not. But if I don't, we had some good fucking times together._

_Rest in peace._

* * *

Rock Tunnel, revisited.

Frederick was my sole weapon, slowly leveling up to match the standards of my other Pokemon.

Hikers were easy wipeouts – Magnitude was super-effective on most anything they could throw at me. Their few Machops were taken care of by Xander's vengeful wings.

Other trainers, such as cosplayers, lasses, campers and picnickers – were trumped with his Rock Throw move.

But then, I found a guy who sort of just sat there, confined in a wall of boulders. When I approached him, expecting a battle, he shook his head, then offered me something better: Rock Slide.

Frederick just got even more amazing.

* * *

We managed to escape the cave, and it was noon. The sun was directly over head, and the warmth on my skin was almost orgasmic after being locked inside that dark, musty cave for so long.

I had entered the cave with Kashen, Xander and Leroy. I exited with a Charmeleon, Golbat, Voltorb and Graveler.

And Lavender Town loomed before us.

The tower was where I wanted to go first – and for one reason and one reason only.

I was going to erect tombstones for every single one of my Pokemon. They weren't going to be buried here, true. But I had to pay respects to them – serious respects. Not just remembering them from time to time. I had to have something solid under my fingertips, something that would always be there to hold their memory in place.

"Pokemon Tower," the sign read. People inside all wore a look I knew well: one of loss.

"My Growlithe is buried up there," said a girl who had running mascara.

"My poor Clefairy…" bemoaned a balding man with tattoos on his arms.

I pushed past them, going up to the receptionist.

"Where can I go to put up tombstones for my Pokemon?" I demanded.

"I'm terribly sorry, but the tower's being rented out right now," the woman said, looking flustered.

"…Rented out? I thought this was a cemetery, not a fucking motel!"

"Well, it is, but a very powerful man has requested it, and Mr. Fuji is up there… I'm not sure what to tell you," she seemed to apologize. I twitched.

"I'll just go up there my fucking self, then," I snapped, whirling around to climb the stairs.

And who do I find, but my good friend Green?

Kneeling before a tombstone, Green was gazing intently into the script burned into it. I wasn't going to interrupt him, but he saw me and shot to his feet, looking embarrassed.

"Uh, hey. What are you doing here, Leaf?" He asked, running one lone, nervous hand through his gold hair. His class ring – a sapphire, his birth stone, I guess, glowed faintly in the dull lighting.

"I came here to… well, why else would someone come to Pokemon Tower?" I looked away, unwilling to meet his eyes.

"Your Pokemon don't look dead to me," he said, bluntly.

"I could say the same to you," I shot back, and he seemed to blanch. Was I mistaken?

"Well. I came for the battles. A lot of crazy people with too much energy are battling up here," he said, smirking.

"I guess you're one of them. A battle?" I asked, and he grinned.

"Don't mind if we do."

Green used Pidgeotto, the graceful, elegant bird that I remembered from so long ago. I used Frederick, my solid, independent Rock type, my newly-evolved Graveler.

The battle didn't last long. Pidgeotto was felled by a strong sweep of Rock Slide, and Frederick was barely touched by his swift Normal moves.

Next came Growlithe. It's Ember and Bite were nothing to Frederick, who just issued a Magnitude of ground-shaking quality.

Green was looking determined, so he sent out Wartortle. I called Frederick back, then grinned.

"Go, Flitz!"

Wartortle was used to battling Kashen; therefore, he wasn't prepared to face the little round sphere with enough electric power to destroy any Water type.

"Wartortle, Protect!" Green called, stalling.

"Flitz, Screech!"

My Voltorb produced a shrill, horrific sound that grated into everyone's ears. Wartortle winced. It wasn't a move used specifically or strategically – just to waste time, waiting for the force field to dissipate.

"Okay, Flitz… Shock Wave!"

Spinning once, twice, Flitz called down the thunderous blast which blew Wartortle away.

It was good to see the little fucker down and out.

Two Pokemon left.

"Go, Exeggcute!"

I withdrew Flitz.

"Alright, go, Kashen!"

"Charr!" He cried fiercely upon release, swinging his tail and generating a heat wave.

Exeggcute were pink, egg-shaped seeds, some broken, all with mean-tempered expressions on their various faces. They were a weak Grass type, and Kashen had no problem taking them out.

"Ember!"

Flames attacked them, took them all out.

"Go, Kadabra!" Green was using his last resort – his powerful Psychic type.

"Kadabra," it said, voice deep and intimidating.

I looked to Kashen, still fully healthy and aggressively surveying his opponent.

I shrugged.

"Go for it, Kashen. Use Mega Punch!"

Fist powered, Kashen ran to Kadabra, who had low defense, and slammed him powerfully in the weak stomach.

"Dabra!" It cried, using a shimmering Psywave to blow him back and away from it.

"Meleon!" Kashen spat fire to the side, but I shook my head.

"No, Kashen. It's special defense is wicked. Use Metal Claw instead."

"Charr." He huffed, but his claws grew luminous with the familiar metallic sheen as he smacked them over Kadabra's face.

Bleeding welts collected drops of sanguine in Kadabra's whiskers, and after the blow, he staggered and fell, victim to my Charmeleon.

After the battle, Kashen looked to me, mouth parted slightly. He ejected not a puff of fire, but a steady stream of powerful flames – Flamethrower.

_Thank God._

I patted him around his young dragon's horn, smiling at him in congratulations.

"A real Fire attack! Wow, you're almost a Charizard, buddy," I said.

"Charr," he cried happily, reaching up to hug me.

Real affection from a usually distant friend, I accepted his hug and gave him my own.

"Hey…"

Green walked over, face slightly paler. From his usual loss to me, or... something else?

"What do you want?" I asked sharply, lifting my face from Kashen's hot skin.

"I was just… nevermind. I guess I'll see you later," Green said, back tracking after my open hostility.

Who knows what he was going to say?

More importantly - who cares?

I watched him walk away, hands in his pocket, head still held high, when I noticed the tombstone he'd been in front of before our meeting.

What could that possibly mean to him?

Kashen and I walked over, and the feeling I got when I read it is indescribable. Pity, I guess, comes the closest, but it wasn't only that.

"Raticate

4 – 25"

* * *

**Current Team:**

Charmeleon: "Kashen" - Male, Level 33

Golbat: "Xander" - Male, Level 31

Voltorb: "Flitz" - Level 29

Graveler: "Frederick" - Male, Level 29


	17. I Feel the Snake Bite Enter My Veins

**Locke and Key: **_A Nuzlocke Story_

A/N: Seems like it's been awhile since the last update. Sorry about that, haha. This chapter's sort of a filler, due to writer's block and me being busy. The next one will probably be pretty long, though. Lots to cover. :P

* * *

"I'm not the one who's so far away  
When I feel the snake bite enter my veins.  
Never do I wanna be here again,  
And I don't remember why I came."  
- Godsmack, "Voodoo"; _Godsmack_.

* * *

"This has gotta be the worst gig ever," muttered the man in the black costume, leaning against the wall and biting his lower lip. A black hat tilted into his face, and his stance suggested a devil-may-care attitude, but his eyes were strained and shadowed, his hands rubbing against his black pants as if to wipe something off of them. The truth was, his palms here damp.

"Yeah, right. You weren't there diggin' fossils outta that damn cave," grumbled another man next to him, plumper and more grizzled-looking in the face, but with a similar black suit. The chest was printed with a large red "R". He was digging in his bag for something, eyes narrowed in frustration.

"Least there were no ghosts there. Ghost Pokemon," he stuttered, correcting himself. "Gastly. God, whatever created Pokemon messed up when they made that damn thing. So creepy-looking."

The other man paused. "Do you ever shuttup? Jeez, where's my…" he went back to shuffling through the sack on the ground, lips pursed.

"I mean, it just floats around, its tongue hangin' out like it owns the world, and scares people. Creepy fuckin' Pokemon, I'll tell you that… and the trainers who have 'em are batshit crazy…"

"Ah hah!" The fat man lifted a Poke Ball from his bag. It glinted faintly under the bad lighting of the tower, but even the light fog couldn't take the apple-red shine from it.

"_That's_ what you kept us standin' here for? Fuck, Rob, we could be to the top by now," growled the thin, gaunt man.

"Can't go up there without my Pokemon, you dumbass." He released it from its ball, the white glare leaving to reveal a long-bodied purple viper. Its yellow eyes, the pupils mere slits, focused on the thin man.

"Creepy ass thing. Couldn't you just stick with Sandshrew or Rattata, like the rest of us?"

"Ekans are _way_ more intimidating. We ain't tryin' to cutefy kids into givin' us their Pokemon. We're takin' everything we can by force, and good, scary-lookin' Pokemon are way better for the job than a little dirt mouse."

"Sandshrew's not bad," he defended his Pokemon loosely. The Pokemon in question stood near his feet, examining its short claws.

"Whatever. Let's go, Brent."

The two started to move forward, towards the stairs, when a small cry alerted them both. Instead of a shrill Ghost-type's cry, it was low and more of a wail. They shared a glance, Brent raising his arms to rub the chill from them.

"The _hell_ was that?" He asked, loudly.

"Hell if I know. Let's go check it out," Rob said, taking a flash light from his pack.

Brent said nothing, only sighed to himself as his partner started moving forward through the mist. His Ekans trailed behind him, and the Sandshrew at his side moved with it.

Not wanting to be left behind, he quickened his pace, still watching carefully for anything that might come at him from the sides.

"Ya see anything?" He asked loudly.

"No… not yet… _yowch!_"

"Rob?" Without realizing it, his voice had cracked shrilly. He couldn't decide if he wanted to rush forward or stay stock still. "Rob, you okay? What was that?"

"Little _fucker_," growled the man from ahead. The fog thinned briefly, allowing Brent to see his partner kneeling on the ground, clutching his knee.

"Ekaaans," snarled his adder, which prepared to strike whatever was hiding in the shadows of the grave stones.

"It's hidin' back there," Rob managed.

Brent turned, still shaking slightly. "What? A Pokemon? Sandshrew, go find it!"

Brent's Sandshrew rushed up to the line of neat Pokemon graves, and Rob's Ekans followed.

Rob grit his teeth, yelling now more out of pain then anger. "Don't bother bein' gentle. Destroy whatever you have to to bring that little fucker to me!"

"…Destroy the graves?" Brent was unsure. "Won't that—"

"If you say one more goddam thing about ghosts, I swear, I'm gonna—"

"Cuuu!"

Shoving aside a slab of knocked-over tombstone, Sandshrew and Ekans returned, a small Pokemon wrapped in the tight coils of its Poison type foe. Small and brown, the most noticeable things about it were the bones on it – the bone it carried in its left hand, and the skull masking its face.

"Oh hell," Rob said, shaking his head. "You hit me with that bone, you little shit? I'm gonna kick your face in 'til the bone splinters. Guess we'll get to see what's under your mask after all." He laughed, and Brent shuddered to hear the malice in it. Guess there was no question that Rob belonged in Team Rocket.

"You gonna kill it, Rob? Anyways, how you kickin' it? You're hurt pretty bad, from the looks of it. Might'a shattered your knee cap," he said doubtfully, still examining Rob. There were beads of sweat at his hairline, though he tried to hold his composure otherwise.

"My other leg works just fine."

"Better let me do it." Brent was shocked to hear himself say such a thing, but he figured the Pokemon had it coming to it, for hitting his partner. Anyways, he was part of Team Rocket now. There was no more being a pussy. It was time to man up – to be a badass, like he'd always dreamed of being, a true dark outlaw.

The Ekans squeezed its long body around the Cubone, causing it to cry out in pain – another low, mournful cry, somehow lonely in its lingering sadness.

Brent was prepared to shove his foot into its face, when a deeper voice sounded behind them – sounding malevolent instead of lonely, but similar in tone to the Cubone's.

"Marowak."

Sandshrew darted forward before Brent's own kneecap could be shattered, caught the blow from the Pokemon's bone, and jumped up to wrestle it to the ground.

Somewhat shocked by his Pokemon's loyalty, Brent managed to rush over and wrench the bone from the Marowak's right paw. He tossed it away, knowing that without its weapon, the Pokemon was virtually helpless.

"Tryin' to save your baby?" Brent managed to say, sounding angry, but inside was really just sickened by what he was about to do. "Well, your baby's gonna die, and so are you, you little fucker."

Rob's Ekans slithered over, Cubone forgotten, as it wrapped itself tightly around Marowak. At the humans' commands, they stilled the Ground Pokemon, who struggled and began to cry out angrily.

"Wak, wak, maro!" It was looking wildly around, possibly to see if it's baby Cubone was safe, if it had escaped.

Not bothering to look, Brent pulled a gun from its holster.

"Bye, you bitch," he said hollowly, and shot the Marowak in the face.

From behind a tombstone, a softly crying Cubone let its small bone fall to the floor. It grabbed the longer Marowak's bone, gripping it tightly before it ran into the darkness, away from the corpse of its mother and her killers.

* * *

The rest of the tower was creepy, no doubt.

For some reason, after the first and second floors, the tower was in awful shape. A thin layer of fog covered the tops of the tombstones that lined the walls, some fresh and with deep inscriptions, others with blank faces, erased by time. There were no real trainers in here, thankfully. I would have been angry to see a bunch of kids and Pokemon playing around in such a solemn place.

Hypocritical? No way. I had come for a reason.

Behind me, I'd left a wake of dead Pokemon, and I had come here to make things right with them. To erect a grave for every one of them – not a grave of their bodies, but of their memories. A solid place where I could mourn them in peace, even after my journey had come to an end – however it would.

I waved some fog away, annoyed with the humidity in the building. It smelled of must and cobwebs, and some of the graves were in bad condition. The top half of the building had been neglected, which irked me.

Another thing – chandlers.

_Everywhere_.

All of them had Gastly or Haunter. And all of them scared the shit out of me. They all had long, flowing witch's hair and crazed black eyes. And all of them claimed to be possessed during battle, during which they chanted in other languages and moaned that they wanted to drink of my blood.

After the battle, they acted more or less like people. Maybe they _were_ possessed, but I couldn't really say for sure that I believed in demons or otherworldly spirits of evil.

Not then, at least. And not quite of that type. But I found out that demons did exist. And so did ghosts.

One last staircase lay before me.

I approached it gingerly, seeing that it was slightly rotted underneath. If it collapsed under me, I'd be in trouble, as there was no one up here but crazy voodoo queens.

As my hand touched the rail, a cool wind swept by me, and the fog was lifted from my vision immediately. Not just my vision – the entire room was swept of fog, as though a pair of wings had flapped it away with Defog, or a fan had been placed in the room.

The hair on the back of my neck bristled involuntarily. I turned, biting my lower lip softly. There wasn't anything behind me, but there was definitely something weird going on here. I hadn't run into any Pokemon in here, although I'd heard Gastly and Haunter played around here. No wild Pokemon, _nothing_ but chandlers, and then…

"_Get out._"

The voice was coming from the top of the staircase.

I slowly moved my head, my breath shallow. I wanted to be brave, but what I saw was enough to send me running.

* * *

"Charr?" Kashen questioned, sitting next to me on the bench in the Pokemon Center, careful to keep his tail from the fabric on the back of the chair.

"I don't know what it was." My voice was hoarse. I hadn't been crying, which was why it was usually hoarse, but I felt as though I was inside. "It… it's face…" I struggled to keep the image out of my mind, but it flooded into my brain anyways. A Pokemon, no doubt, half of its face missing, splinters of bone embedded into the facial flesh, muscle and bone peering through, a single blank eye staring furiously into mine…

I gripped my arms with both hands, realizing I had goose bumps again.

"Just be glad you weren't out," I managed. "I don't know what that could have been but a ghost. Not a Ghost type, but a real soul, left behind for some reason. And I couldn't go up those stairs with that thing staring me down."

"Charr charr," he said, shrugging. I guess he was trying to say "oh well", but I wasn't comforted. I had witnessed a left behind piece of the dead. Not just a Pokemon's cold corpse, which I had held and buried many a time, but the embodiment of evil and tragedy.

For what else could render a Pokemon faceless and restless?

"Meleon." He tugged my shirt, gesturing to the door of the Pokemon Center.

"Yeah. I guess we'll just… go to Celadon for now," I said, but that was the last thing I felt like doing.

I felt like going to sleep, and what a luxury it'd be to not have to see that thing in my dreams, as I knew I would.

* * *

The road to Celadon City had a plethora of young trainers who all looked annoyed. Standing in a group, they were glaring at the turnpike-like building that admitted people to Saffron City.

"What's the hold up?" I asked, as casually as I could.

One lass in a short skirt – as usual – huffed, brushing a thick lock of brown hair behind her shoulder.

"The security guard's not letting anybody through, and no one knows why! I really wanted to fight Sabrina, too," she whined. I looked at her belt – two Poke Balls.

"You're fighting Sabrina with two Pokemon? Tch. Fight me instead," I said. The chills of the ghost had forced me to seek the heat of battle fire. The one thing that had always brought out passion in me, instead of this dreary gray apathy, this fear and insatiable grief that the spirit had planted in me.

"Huh. If you say so." She picked a Poke Ball. "Go, Nidoran!"

The small blue female form of the Poison type emerged, nose twitching like a guinea pig or something. I chose the Great Ball from my belt.

"Go, Flitz!"

My Voltorb emerged, electricity pulsing from him as soon as he entered the battle field.

"Shock Wave!" I called, watching as he speedily shot off the impossible-to-evade bolt of lightning that struck down the Nidoran almost immediately.

What an easy battle. My Pokemon were fairly high-leveled for this area of Kanto, I knew, which was surprising. I had wasted a lot of time training Pokemon that had died soon after.

"Go, Nidorina!"

The evolved form of the female Nidoran stood before me. Longer limbed, with no horn and long claws, Nidorina wasn't intimidating, as Nidorino was, but it was still a tough opponent… except Flitz was tougher.

I knew that.

Smiling, I commanded: "Shock Wave!"

It struck the Nidorina, which almost rendered her unconscious on impact. Instead, she rushed forward, claws unsheathed to maul the Voltorb with Fury Swipes.

"Come on, Flitz, dodge it!" I yelled, and he actually did manage to roll away just in time for the Nidorina to lodge her claws in the dirt.

"Sonicboom!" Sharp blades of air were erected and sent flying into the Poison type, sending it into a faint just as her smaller form had done before her.

I smirked, not surprised by the victory, but still pleased with myself and with Flitz. "Good job, buddy," I said, approaching him, when all of a sudden, he flashed white.

Level thirty… I'd forgotten what level Voltorb evolved at.

Before me stood a larger sphere, one with a white top and red bottom - the inverse of Voltorb's coloring - and a cocky expression, a wide grin.

"Electrode," he cried, pleased with himself, just as I was pleased.

"Flitz… you're so badass."

"Troode," he said, tilting his face up to me and flashing me his never-ending smile.

"I guess you concur," I said, smiling humorlessly.

* * *

**Current Team:**

Charmeleon: "Kashen" - Male, Level 33

Golbat: "Xander" - Male, Level 33

Electrode: "Flitz" - Level 31

Graveler: "Frederick" - Male, Level 32


	18. Make the Guilty Pay

**Locke and Key: **_A Nuzlocke Story_

A/N: Sorry for the wait! The Rocket battle in this chapter doesn't happen like this in the games, but hey, who's caring? Not me. :) Also, just so you know, Xander's "problem" really DID happen in the games. _So _frustrating. Anyways, enjoy!

* * *

Dark devotion in a beacon paradise  
Shows no emotion to a willing sacrifice.  
Well, you can put a man on trial, but you can't make the guilty pay.  
And you can cage an animal, but you can't take away the rage.  
-Shinedown, "Heroes"; _Us and Them._

* * *

Celadon City was very different from any place I'd previously visited on my journey, but some things never change. One of those things is the Pokemon Center. Always one of the first things I located in a new town, I headed there now to take care of some overdue business.

"Leaf? Is that you again?"

The familiar voice eased some tension out of my spine, and, reclining back on the plush red couch against the wall, I felt myself relax. My Poke Balls – Xander's, Flitz's and Frederick's, that is – were all with Nurse Joy, who was healing Xander's Paralysis and Frederick's Burn, while my Electrode's health was a little depleted.

Kashen sat leisurely beside me, holding his tail flame to keep it from singeing the back of the sofa. He was staring at another girl here – well, more accurately, he was staring at her Vulpix, mesmerized by the sway of its lush crimson tails. I tried not to laugh – instead, I focused on Oak's voice, calm but stern in a comforting way.

I felt better than I had in awhile, I'll admit. It seems I always feel a whole fucking lot better when I talk to Oak, even today.

"Yeah, Professor. I had a few questions."

"Fire away, dear. But first: how is your Pokedex coming?"

I smiled nervously at Kashen, whose arms were crossed. He smirked, too. "Charr," he laughed, as if agreeing that I hadn't been catching Pokemon left and right. Unlike Green, who had several Pokemon he didn't even _use_, who probably sat and rotted in the PC, neither free nor alongside a trainer. I disapproved of that method, but whatever.

Oak surely knew I couldn't do that, anyway.

"…Fantastic. Listen, my Golbat, Xander…"

"He's alright, isn't he?" Oak pressed, quick to jump to conclusions after our last 'chat'.

"Yes, he's fine… or, at least, I think so." I quickly described the previous battle, after which Xander glowed with evolutionary energy, but then randomly seized up without evolving.

Oak was quiet for a moment.

"Did you command him not to?"

"Of course not! I'd love a Crobat." Golbat had been a good Pokemon in Cerulean City and Vermillion, but now it's stats were lagging. I needed stronger Pokemon, if I was going to make it to the top.

"Hmm. Oh—perhaps I know what it is." He sounded embarrassed. "The Pokedex controls a lot of things – it holds data for not only your Pokemon's species, but yours specifically, as it's connected to the Poke Ball you caught it in. Therefore, because you have only the Kanto dex, your Pokemon can't evolve…"

"…Until I upgrade." I was pissed. "I can't have a Crobat until I catch all 150 Pokemon and beat the Elite Four?"

"It… looks to be that way, yes," Professor Oak admitted, chuckling lowly.

What I wanted to say was "fuck you," but I realized just before I parted my lips that I actually respected him enough to not let it fall out. To control an impulse as deeply imbedded as that one is highly impressive, impressive enough to make the desire to curse fade.

Kashen gave me a warning look, as if he knew, but I tipped him a slow wink.

"It's… fine," I managed, smirking. "Xander's great the way he is." _Lies. He won't be when… if… I get to the Elite Four. Golbat and Graveler both? Neither will be able to evolve. How am I ever going to beat them?_

"I'm glad you see it that way," Professor Oak said.

I could swear he sounded smug, but I just said goodbye and hung up.

_Like grandfather, like grandson,_ I thought, then laughed to myself at how utterly true it really was.

* * *

Celadon City was beautiful. Skyscrapers towered above me, the sunlight pouring in through the immense glass windows. Clean and upswept, this city was on the outside, on the surface, but as a kid who grew up with bad people in bad places, I knew every industrial place had a corner of shadows, one where people dealt drugs, ran black markets, and sold sex.

I had yet to find it here, that stain upon the pure silk, that black hole near the sun that drained the city's positivity into the seedy shadows.

That is, until I went searching for the gym.

Out of the corner of my eye, a building with a large, flashy sign, neon despite the bright noon sky caught my eye. The sign read "Celadon Game Corner—The Adult Play Ground!" Next to it, a smaller building nestled against the mother building, reading "Cash In For Great Prisez!"

…Can people learn how to fucking spell?

Anyways, I'm not a big gambler. Not with money, anyways. So I was reluctant to investigate.

"Gravel, graveler," grated the voice beside me, near my knees. I glanced down at Frederick, who was looking earnestly up at me, his eyes bright and small in his craggy moutain's face. He waved two of his four appendages, as if attempting to explain something to me.

I blinked.

"What? You want me to go in there? I don't even think I'm allowed. Adult play ground –last I checked, I can't even get into a strip club."

"Graav," he growled, sounding slightly impatient. "Gravel gravel!"

I didn't get it.

So, as a solution, I returned him to his Poke Ball, all thoughts of training evaporating when I realized there were no security guards or cameras outside this casino.

I approached the building, wearing caution, and my suspicions were spiked for sure when I read this: "No IDs required! Trainers welcome!"

_What the hell? What kind of 'adult play ground' advertises that they don't card you? And… trainers welcome?_

Maybe Frederick had noticed this, and was warning me.

I narrowed my eyes.

This couldn't be good.

"Hey, kid," grunted a voice from behind me, "You gonna go in or jest stand there in front of the door all day?"

I turned slightly, irate and about to show it, but the guy behind me had his knee bandaged up and was supporting his hefty self on a cane. His hair was thinning, eyes blazing blue, darker than Green's and full of a malicious discontent for the world.

_Wonder how that happened,_ I thought briefly, before moving out of his way.

As the man grouchily entered the casino, a shaft of sunlight fell over one broad shoulder to gleam off of the single Poke Ball at his belt.

I narrowed my eyes.

A trainer.

Without further ado, I went inside, not quite sure of what I'd find, just knowing that I wanted to find it.

* * *

What I _did_ find was a whole lot of people wasting their lives away in front of machines… and not to mention their hard-earned trainer's cash.

Every low-life I saw there had Pokemon, either sitting next to them, near them, or sitting captive in their balls. They had their eyes glued to the reels, their Pokemon looking bored or tired. _These nut cases have probably been sitting here all day. Gambling's as bad an addiction as any, I suppose._

I strolled through the black and white tiled aisles, ignoring the carnival colors of the slot machines and card tables, ignoring the spacey look of the players.

I went straight to the receptionist, who was leering at me since the moment I came inside. Her eyes were sharp, and she seemed perplexed, as though I wasn't someone she expected in here, or some bullshit.

"Can I help you?" She asked, smiling queerly.

"Uh, yeah. Can I get some coins?" I asked, wondering simultaneously what I was doing. _You don't even gamble, Leaf!_

_Yeah, well, I'm curious,_ I argued with myself.

_Hard-earned trainer money, wasted…?_

_I can always get more!_

_Uh huh. Sounds like the cigarette excuse…_

I brushed my schizophrenic thoughts away, picking up on the woman's smile as it flattened.

"No," she said. I blinked, too surprised to say anything for a solid ten seconds. When I did, I was dismayed to find my words a stream of steady gasoline, my tongue holding a sparking match.

"Refusing me service? That's shit," I said, a little outraged.

"I…" She looked flustered, either at my language or my aggressive attitude, then looked at her papers. "Oh, right. Um, ma'am, in order to play the slots, you must have a coin case."

"…A coin case? What good will that do me?"

"…You have to have it. No questions asked. Please return with one, or don't return at all." She turned her nose up and away, clearly signaling that her bitchy Botoxed self was greater than me.

"Where do I get one?"

"Please ask a customer. Next, please," she called, and the guy with the busted knee shoved me out of the way, onto the tiles of the floor. My dirty skirt rode up over my ass, and, shivering from the cold tile on my bare skin, indignity flamed me back up.

"You _asshole_!" I called, scrambling to my feet. The man glanced at me, a glint in his eye – one that matched the woman's, actually. "Why don't you keep your goddamn hands to yourself!"

"You wanna go?" He asked, his voice a wolf's snarl. "'Cause princess, I don't think you wanna mess with the likes of me."

I stopped, my fist falling. There was something familiar about this guy. Not him particularly, but something about his attitude, his stance, was eating at my subconscious.

"I'm _real_ afraid," I bit back. He glowered at me, shaking his head slowly, studying me. Him, burly, tough, dark, scary, versus me, small, slight, a young woman in a short, dirty skirt and with flashing green eyes. However, he had one Poke Ball at his belt, while I had four, and while I doubt I'd last a second in a _real_ fight with him, my Pokemon were far better weapons than his fists.

He seemed to realize that, as he appraised me and noticed the red spheres—one navy—at my hip.

"So yer a trainer," he said, slowly. "What Pokemon do you have?"

_Hmm… interesting question._

"Do you want me to show you?" I bit back.

"Sure. Let's go!" He grabbed at the Ball at his own hip, enlarging it in one clawed hand. My own hand strayed for any of my four Pokemon, grabbed at one, and enlarged it myself.

Before we could go—right there in the middle of the casino, no less—another man from the back room rushed forward, obviously noticing the flustered, appalled receptionist and the distracted customers.

This man was lean, lanky, with a dark face and hair. He glared at me, then shifted his gaze to the man before me, shaking his head with disapproval.

"Rob, what are you doing? I thought we agreed, no more fighting—not until your knee heals, anyway." He sounded somewhat concerned.

"Shuddap, Brent. I got this. This little bitch thinks she can take me." Bared teeth, like a Growlithe or Vulpix who was threatened and offended.

I smirked.

"I _know_ I can take you… _Rob_." _What a boring name, for a thug like him…_

"Well… I don't want you fighting alone. Lemme help you out here," the other man said, looking at me with a humorless face. Rob grinned wickedly.

_What? A… team battle? And who are these creeps, anyway?_ I took another Poke Ball, prepared to fight, regardless of the odds. I knew I could take them.

"Go, Sandshrew!" The thin man shouted.

"Ekans, attack!" Rob cried.

A small, expressionless Sandshrew, dusted yellow patchwork mouse, appeared next to a vicious-looking viper, limber and purple. The Ekans' round, slitted yellow eyes found my own and flashed with the dull lights overhead.

I threw the Balls in my hands. From one came Xander. The other one spilled Flitz.

I could work with that.

"Xander, Aerial Ace on the Sandshrew! Flitz, Spark on the Ekans!"

Speedily, Flitz spun on his axis, sending white lightning dancing from his solid body and into the Ekans, who writhed in momentary pain. _Damn, he's even quicker as an Electrode,_ I thought, clenching my left fist in concentration.

Xander slapped his wings together. The air between them became forced into a spear of wind that dove straight into the Sandshrew's soft white belly. The Ground type staggered backwards, eyes closed in stunned hurt.

I smiled. The dazed pair of creeps looked surprised to see my Pokemon turn out so tough—or me, for that matter. "Had enough, boys?"

The thin man shook his head, biting his lower lip. "Sandshrew, Fury Swipes on Electrode!" It nodded in thoughtless affirmation, darting forward to scratch at Flitz with tiny claws. Flitz whipped around, managing to avoid the hit, but sitting dizzily in place afterwards.

There was something familiar about the Pokemon, too, now that I thought about it. The Sandshrew was a loyal soldier, ready to die for the cause and the people; the Ekans looked on with lifeless malice.

I shook my head, as the similarity hit me: Team Rocket.

I didn't say anything, but my determination spread, fanned by winds of war and revenge.

"Ekans, Glare on the Golbat!"

The Ekans turned a violent stare onto Xander, who was frozen in the air immediately, sparks writhing over his wings and body. Paralyzed. _Shit._

"Flitz, Flash on the Sandshrew! Xander, Confuse Ray on Ekans!"

Blinding white light stunned the Sandshrew, whose next move was to burrow underground to uproot Flitz. It stumbled and clumsily crawled beneath the ground of the casino. I heard the receptionist moan as the tile was torn.

The Ekans shot forward to Bite Xander, and he screeched shrilly as its fangs found the tender inside of his wing. Crazily, he used his other wing to slap the snake upside the head fervently, then sent the ray of confusion into his starey eyes.

It fell to the ground, bite forgotten, to attack itself repeatedly, ending in a knock out.

Rob gritted his teeth.

"You better get this, Brent," he muttered lowly, recalling the adder.

Brent—the thin man—nodded.

"Sandshrew, come up from under there! Get the Electrode!"

But Flitz's Flash had done its duty—the Sandshrew fumbled up to hit Xander, who was in the air and immune to Ground moves.

"Sonicboom!"

Blades of Normal type air slit the Sandshrew's tough hide, sending droplets of fine, thin blood into the air to litter the ground. The Sandshrew collapsed, and I stood victorious, Flitz and Xander giving each other congratulatory, gloating looks.

"Great job, you guys!" I smiled slyly, realizing that there was a chance for friendship. "You guys make a great team!"

Flitz looked pleased, and Xander squealed. He attempted to flip in the air, but his stiff, paralyzed wings prevented him from completing the turn. He fell into my arms heavily, an annoyed expression on his small face.

"Don't worry, buddy. We'll go to the Pokemon Center after this."

"Gol, golbat," he agreed, sounding irritated.

I stood there, chatting it up with my Pokemon, while those two men looked at each other without saying a word—a single word.

When I looked up again, they were gone, and the receptionist—that busybody bitch who kept wringing her hands—was rushing over to check the damaged floor.

"You're going to pay for this, you know!" She wailed, shaking her head.

I stared at the spot where the men had been, shaking my head lightly. A ringing suspicion had resounded throughout my mind when I'd seen the two men, had seen their Pokemon… but now it was a full-scale alarm.

"I suspect you'll have someone that'll do that for you, lady," I murmured, turning to face her. "Tell me… who's runnin' this joint? Is it Team Rocket?"

When I said it—the name—all the trainers paused, silence invading the fun and the waste of cash. The woman's eyebrows quivered, as though she couldn't make up her mind which expression to make, then stilled.

"You'll have to take it up with—"

"I swear to God," I growled, approaching her as swiftly as my sore legs would carry me. I grabbed her by her prissy collar, shaking her from side to side in the most aggressive manner I could manage, "if you don't tell me the truth about this place—about who's running this game corner—than I will do to you much worse things than I did to your precious floor!" I threw her down, then gestured to Flitz behind me, who sparked, his cocky expression turning into one of anger. Xander, leaning against the Electrode, opened his enormous mouth wide, seeming to grin crazily.

The woman shuddered, then sank into a limp puddle on the floor, shaking her head. "He'll kill me if I tell. No—he'll make sure someone comes after me if I do," she managed, her voice hoarse.

Who? Who was she afraid of?

"Just tell me. I'll get rid of him—I'll make sure this guy, whoever he is, won't hurt you," I said, attempting to be empathetic. I wasn't. Let's just say I don't come off as the "I understand your predicament and want to help you" type. But I guess you already know that.

She blinked, her tears glistening.

She really _was_ afraid, wasn't she?

"Team Rocket _does _own this place, but it's not _them_ I'm afraid of," she muttered. "It's who owns _them_—Giovanni."

_Giovanni, eh?_

I had a motive.

I had a name.

Now all I needed was a face.

* * *

Night had long descended over the glorious city of Celadon.

I was walking through a narrow street, the houses looming above me like nightmarish figures, taunting me like creatures themselves—manifestations of my dreams, my horrors. I could banish my fears, my imaginings, but there was still things lurking in my mind that were taller, stronger, darker than my old fears. The haunted body of a brutally murdered Pokemon, the enslaved teams of Team Rocket, the commanding king who eluded me still.

_Giovanni_.

In this town, a true enemy I had yet to meet lurked around.

But where?

And how could I find him?

The moon was shrouded by clouds, providing only a thin light from the stars to guide my path. As I peered into the darkness ahead, sandwiched between urban city streets and rural forests, I noticed a thin trail winding into nothing—or so it seemed.

I took this trail, not expecting much—but I came upon the domed building of the Celadon City Gym.

_This is what I came this way for,_ I thought, glancing at the four Balls clipped to my belt. _This is what _we_ came this way for._

_Giovanni will have to wait._

I clenched my fist, the anger swirling inside of my like stormy winds threatening to gyrate into something worse—a twister of my vengeance, taking all of my frustrations of dead Pokemon and disappointed dreams out on a man who went on killing, destroying, stealing. A man who I'd never met in reality, but who had haunted my journey thus far.

I shook my head, my brown hair shifting around my bare shoulders, and I took a deep breath, the moon moving from behind its clouds to shower me with silver strength.


	19. Watch as We All Fly Away

**Locke and Key:** _A Nuzlocke Story_

* * *

Someone told me that love would all save us.  
But how can that be? Look what love gave us.  
A world full of killing and blood-spilling, that world never came.  
And they say that a hero can save us;  
I'm not gonna stand here and wait.  
I'll hold onto the wings of the eagles,  
And watch as we all fly away.  
-Chad Kroeger, "Hero"; _Spiderman Soundtrack._

* * *

Not every gym is open during the night, but Celadon is one of those cities that rarely sleeps-therefore, it needs a gym that rarely sleeps.

I peered into the windows, seeing a gym that resembled a greenhouse. There were wild-looking plants growing on all sides of the gym trainers, which consisted of girls in skirts, girls in shorts, girls in long, torn jeans, and—yes—standing amidst her battle buddies, a woman in a flowing white silk kimono, her hair chopped short and her eyes lazily hooded.

Erika—a name I knew well, for I'd heard men speak of her in the enormous Poke Mart on my way over here—flipped her shiny, short dark hair from her face, pale eyes following me as I entered her gym. I was determined to annihilate every trainer here before I fought her, despite the fact that I could see shortcuts.

I wanted level ups, and by God, I was going to get them.

Erika nodded to a girl on her right, who approached me.

"Go, Kashen!" I called, whipping out my oldest, most tattered Poke Ball. In a flash of brilliance, my young dragon emerged, wingless and clawed, his flame-crowned tail swirling in the air upon release. His blue eyes blazed like the fire on his tail and in his mouth.

"_Charr,_" he growled, spitting a scrap of fire-his signature taunt.

"Go, Ivysaur!" The girl called, revealing a Pokemon I'd never seen in person before. Bulbasaur—the other Pokemon I'd considered choosing from Professor Oak—was a small, bulb-backed animal with freckled blue flesh and dark red eyes. Ivysaur resembled it, but the bulb was pink and beginning to flower, ferns extending around it. Ivysaur's mouth also held fangs.

"Sauurr," it called, stamping its foot.

Kashen seemed startled to see the Ivysaur, but he looked prepared for battle.

"Kashen, Flamethrower!"

His crimson jaws opened wide, a jet of fire pulsing into the Ivysaur to writhe around him. His long ferns were blackened slightly, his sides heaving.

The lass glowered, then called, "Sleep Powder, Ivysaur!"

_Shit._

A scatter of cobalt dust shrouded my Charmeleon, who inhaled and then slumped to the gym's linoleum floor, sleeping against his will.

I blew air out of my frustrated lips, loathe to waste a turn. Regardless, I took an Awakening out of my bag and spritzed him with it. The tingling damp jolted him awake, but not before Ivysaur could strike again.

"Razor Leaf!"

Leaves with blade-like edges sliced into Kashen, but he brushed most of them away, impervious to heavy Grass damage.

"Finish it off with Slash!" I directed, knowing the Ivysaur was about to go down anyways.

Kashen's claws sent it reeling, the blood welling up around its face. It fainted, and the girl backed away, giving her colleagues a nervous look.

Another girl approached, using Gloom and Weepinbell. I withdrew Kashen, sending out Xander, my Poison and Flying type.

"Aerial Ace, Xander! Cut it down!" I called, and his air blades slit the Gloom and slashed the Weepinbell. Gloom was the evolved form of Oddish, was a sad-looking replica, longer legs, arms, and a half-blooming toxic flower on its ugly head. Weepinbell lost the legs Bellsprout had retained, and instead had larger eyes and an enormous suction mouth from which it spewed acid.

Neither Gloom nor Weepinbell were threats, but Erika had Pokemon that were a step above, and I knew it.

I managed to burn and batter my way through Erika's gym trainers, all with evolutionary variations of Bellsprout, Oddish, and Bulbasaur. Behind us—me, Kashen and Xander, that is—we left a wake of burning leaves, uprooted plants, and flower nectar that took the form of Grass type blood.

Erika had been watching quietly, and once she was out of gym trainers, she stepped forward, her face serene.

"Hello, challenger. My… shall we say, colleagues, have warned me about you. Them, and a challenger I met just before you came in. Earlier today, a boy named… Green, I believe… fought and won against me."

I sighed. Of course he fucking did. "Did he leave me any smartass messages?"

She looked puzzled. "No. He just took his badge, prize money, and technical machine with him and left without saying much. A polite young man, as far as they go these days."

I couldn't believe my ears. Was Green growing up? _Doubt it,_ I thought. Regardless, I was growing tired of sitting here, chitchatting with Erika, whom I was supposed to be beating.

"Can we do this?" I asked abruptly.

Instead of looking offended, she merely offered me her quiet smile and nodded. "Challenger, choose your first Pokemon."

I nodded to Xander, who fluttered his way into the field, flapping his wings to send stray leaves scattering.

Erika closed her eyes, then chose the first of her three Poke Balls. "I choose you, Tangela!"

Before me emerged a rat's nest of blue vines with a dark space for a face and two unblinking little eyes. Tangela was an ugly son of a bitch, and I was unaware of his power. I nodded to the flapping bat at my side, who jetted forward.

"Aerial Ace, Xander!"

Sharp missiles of Flying type energy sent Tangela falling backwards on his nonexistent ass.

Erika nodded to her Pokemon. "Use Constrict, Tangela."

Out of nowhere, vines shot from his messy body; Xander had no time to react before his flapping wings were restrained and he was dragged forward, trapped in a mess of tight blue bondage.

"Gol!" He cried. There was claustrophobic panic in his face as he was dragged up close, to Tangela's creepy, empty face.

"Xander, use Aerial Ace!" I didn't like to see him panic; my Golbat never showed fear. But, with all of his boundless energy, it was to be expected that restraint would freak him out.

He attempted to flap his wings, but Tangela tightened his grip, causing him to screech in pain—and panic.

I shook my head, stumped.

Tangela seemed to breathe into Xander's face, a pink, feminine scent that caused him to go slack. Sweet Scent.

"Okay, Tangela," Erika commanded, her voice slightly sharper now, "Use Vine Whip!"

Another strand of vine crawled over Tangela's small head and lashed at Xander. The pain was minimal, but that was besides the point.

"Okay, Xander, return!" I drew him into his Poke Ball, keeping him safe from Tangela. Next, I nodded to Kashen, who looked eager to destroy.

He charged onto the field. Tangela's long vines shot toward him, and before I could command, his claws shone and he was slicing the vines so that they fell to the ground, wriggling as if they were still part of Tangela. The Grass type cried out in pain, and Erika looked surprised.

"Kashen, Flamethrower!"

"Tangela, Vine Whip!"

The Vine Whip rushed to grab at Kashen's mouth, throat, and flailing claws, but he was quicker than the little ball of yarn. He breathed fire over the vines, scorching them and rendering him unconscious.

"Return, Tangela," Erika called, her face calm and statuelike. Next, she revealed a weapon I should have suspected—but was not afraid of.

"Go, Victreebel!"

A tall, bell-shaped plant, resembling Bellsprout and Weepinbell, emerged. Yellow, with a long spear-like vine and gaping acid-spitting mouth, Victreebel was impressively scary.

Kashen wasn't intimidated, though.

"Kashen, use Slash!"

He rushed forward, claws at the ready, and Victreebel was hit. As the impact was made, the Grass and Poison type made a hideous screaming sound, a noise that struck my ears like lightning.

_Ugh. I need to shut that thing up, fast._

"Victreebel, Acid!"

_What?_

A sick-looking green pile of sludge was hurled at Kashen; he was covered, and, of course, poisoned on contact. I cursed under my breath, shuffling through the bag to find an Antidote, and when I did, I sprayed it on him.

I won't bore you with this part, but let's just say that happened about six times before Kashen could finally get a turn to attack with Flamethrower.

Victreebel, charred into exhaustion, collapsed, and Erika withdrew him, finally releasing her final Pokemon.

Vileplume, also level 30, emerged, striking a pose for Kashen and I. The bloom on its head was thick in concentrated status-infecting dusts and spores. I didn't have many Antidotes left, and my Paralyz Heals and Awakenings were heavily depleted, too.

I bit my lip, suddenly worried, despite my type advantages.

"Vileplume, Stun Spore." Erika's soft voice cajoled to the Pokemon as yellow-gold powder descended over my Pokemon. He was effectively paralyzed, stiffening immediately.

"Great… Kashen, Flamethrower!"

Slowly, he managed to pry his jaws open and let loose a stream of jetting fire, and Vileplume was hit.

However, the next attack worried me.

"Petal Dance, Vileplume."

Soft-looking, pastel-colored scraps of flower suddenly fell gracefully around Vileplume, who suddenly smirked and made a gesture similar to snapping her fingers. The pieces of blossoms then became erect, and rushed at Kashen, slicing his crimson skin and sending droplets of his blood scattering into the air.

"Kashen!" I called, astonished. How could a not-very-effective attack hurt so damn much? I reached into my bag for my last Paralyz Heal, spraying it onto him.

The moment my turn was over, the petals came again, full-force, barreling into Kashen. More blood flew from him, and he staggered forward. His sides were heaving. Was he about to faint—to die?

"No… Kashen, return!" I cried, but before I could, the last slew of petals shot forward, sending him straight to the floor, blood drizzling from the wounds in his dark skin.

"Kashen!"

I rushed forward, fear lancing into my heart—and guilt. I should have known better. The injuries he had endured… when I reached his side, I realized that, miraculously, he was still breathing—still alive. My starter, my best friend, my partner… he was still breathing, but he was also bleeding out onto the floor of some dirty, plant-heavy gym.

I pulled out his Poke Ball, the fingers that held it trembling.

"K-Kashen, I'm sorry. Please, hang in there… I'll make sure this battle ends quick. And I'll get you help." I returned him to his sanctuary, the tattered Poke Ball I'd met him in, hoping to stop all of his unnecessary bloodshed. He seemed relieved as the pale red beam eclipsed him, captured his energy, and drew him into the Poke Ball.

"Thank God…" I whirled to confront Erika, feeling my eyes blaze in my face, green fire as hot as any Kashen could spit. "I am _not_ losing _another_ Pokemon to a gym leader!" Faces flashed before my eyes: Marlen, fallen to a Shellder in Misty's gym, his white whiskers beaded with scarlet on the floor, impaled on an icicle… and Tobias, clinging to Surge's Raichu through the lightning hell he endured to win that battle. And win he did. But I couldn't let a Pokemon I loved sacrifice their life to win a gym battle... not again.

Erika's expression softened. "I'm sorry. I will assist you after the battle, regardless of the outcome. Although… it appears you have the advantage, here." She nodded to her panting Vileplume, who, after the Petal Dancing, was in a state of confusion. "Let's finish this."

"Xander, go!"

I threw the Poke Ball with force, releasing my Golbat into the fray. Free of Tangela's vines, he was eager to gain lost ground-and knowing Kashen, the Pokemon on my team he'd known the longest without losing, had almost gone down probably gave him extra destructive motive.

"Aerial Ace!"

Zipping forward, faster than Vileplume, especially in her bewildered state, his attack sent the Grass Pokemon flying backwards.

I'd won, but I was too concerned to revel in my victory.

* * *

Midnight had come and gone.

Erika was sitting next to me in the lounge, both of our Pokemon being healed by the nurses who worked around the clock for careless trainers like myself.

Now that I knew Kashen was okay, I was able to sit in silence, realizing that, yes, I was now the proud owner of the Rainbowbadge, Giga Drain, and an assload of cash.

"I'm glad your Charmeleon is okay," Erika murmured beside me. She sounded thoughtful. "You really care about your Pokemon, don't you?"

"I've lost a lot," I said, by way of a reply. I didn't have to wear my heart on my sleeve for her. "Thanks for coming to help me and make sure Kashen's okay. It means a lot, to have a gym leader not be a selfish asshole."

She smiled, a smile that belonged on a doll's delicate, brainless face. "Trainers should all stick together. Just because I control the Celadon City Gym does not make me more or less of a Pokemon trainer than my challengers or gym trainers."

There was an uneasy peace between us as I sat there, fingering the two unhurt Pokemon at my belt-Frederick, a Rock type who would be useless in Erika's gym, and Flitz, who had a disadvantage-when she spoke again, this time sounding more on edge.

"I'm sure you've heard of Team Rocket, haven't you, Leaf?"

I jerked my head up, alerted. "Yes. Why?"

"Have you passed by Lavender Town?" Then she paused. "Of course you have. Team Rocket's got Saffron blocked off… have you been into the tower?"

"Yeah, I have, but I couldn't get to the top. There was… there was something there." I was loathe to talk about this again, but my curiosity—and burning desire for taking down Team Rocket—was driving me.

"A ghost, yes?"

"I… yes." There was no denying that what I saw was not living. Not to this woman, and not to myself.

"Team Rocket killed that Marowak. The guardian of the ghosts in that tower, she was. Ghost Pokemon, that is," she hastily added. "The Marowak's spirit is the only true ghost, despite what you may see. Now that Team Rocket has invaded their home and killed their queen, the Pokemon have taken to hiding behind an illusion they know will terrify humans."

I shook my head, slowly. I was hearing this, and I was believing it.

Fuel was being thrown onto my flames. Coal and gasoline, feeding into my veins, blowing the smoke around.

"They've also taken to hiding out in the two most industrious cities in Kanto… they have the game corner here, and Silph Co. in Saffron."

"Silph Co.!"

Silph Co. was the biggest company in all of Kanto. They manufactured all sorts of technology, and their advancements were fairly impressive—in fact, things Silph Co. made and ideas Silph Co. came up with were bought as far as Hoenn and used. Devon Corporation was their biggest competitors, but sometimes they could coexist.

Besides the point…

"So Team Rocket's going after what matters most in this country, huh?" I said, dropping my hands into my lap. Erika watched them, the fists clenched tightly enough to draw blood where my nails curled into my palm.

"Yes." She sighed gently. "Leaf, you're a competent trainer. The moment you came in, I realized that. When you tore away my gym trainers, defeated me, and showed concern for your Pokemon… you're the one Kanto needs right now." She raised her eyes to meet mine. The spark of light in them was similar to Oak's, and I was sufficiently impressed-but not by her words, her demands.

"Me? We have an elite four, Erika! Eight gym leaders with powerful Pokemon. Trainers all over the country who have stronger Pokemon than I! Why me?" I shook my head slowly. "Why not Green?"

Her eyes clouded with confusion. "You mean the young boy who came before you? I considered him, too. But there's a restlessness in him. Leaf, please. Consider this. Team Rocket is a growing epidemic. If they take over Kanto, they'll move on to Johto, Hoenn, Sinnoh—the world!"

"They're not that powerful… are they?"

She laughed bitterly, a sound that went ill with her sweet face and disposition.

"Not yet they're not. But they will be."

* * *

The receptionist froze up when I walked into the game corner, but I paid her no mind, even as she clicked and clacked toward me in towering heels, her mouth pursed.

"Ma'am, I'll have to ask you to leave."

I ignored her, going to a poster on the wall—one that advertised a kind of soda the PokeMall sold, I think—and fingered the edges of it. There was definitely a raised spot in the center of the poster, and with any luck…

"Ma'am, what are you—"

In one swift motion, I ripped the poster away from the wall with a thick ripping noise. Inside the game corner, motion and noise halted.

The receptionist moaned weakly. There was a switch on the wall.

_I knew it._

Without further ado, I pulled the switch. Instantly, the random bookshelf and potted plant to my right failed to conceal what I knew was there: a staircase leading down.

"You don't want to go in there," the woman wheezed.

"No?" I turned my eyes on her. "And why not? Don't you _want_ me to save this town from these pricks?"

"_You're_ going to save this town? Some foul-mouthed little slut from Pallet Town?" Her lip curled.

I narrowed my eyes.

"How did you know where I was from?"

"Team Rocket has been alerted of you… Leaf. Be sure of that. They all know what you look like. What you're wearing. What Pokemon you have. And Giovanni will be ready for you…" She turned her head away. "If you even make it to him."

I huffed, then found the strength in me to smirk… for the world's benefit.

"Guess we'll see."

I descended the staircase, turning my back to the rest of the empty casino.


	20. All of the Angels

**Locke and Key: **_A Nuzlocke Story_

A/N: I like the ending of this chapter the best, I think. Also, thanks for all the favorites and alerts, guys! It totally made my day to see all of those. :) Thanks for the reviews, too, as always!

* * *

Run and tell all of the angels  
That this could take all night.  
Think I need a devil to help me get things right.  
Hook me up a new evolution,  
'Cause this one is a lie.  
I sat around laughing and watched the last one die.  
-Foo Fighters, "Learn to Fly"; _There is Nothing Left to Lose._

* * *

Ever felt like a bleeding, lame-legged zebra in a hungry lion's den?

Me neither.

The hideout was far more ritzy and upscale than I would have expected. The same checkered tile that paneled the casino walls also decorated the basement floors. Potted plants and clean, mopped floors gave the place the feel of a posh hotel lobby.

Except, y'know, the fact that it was _crawling_ with vermin—scumbag Rocket grunts, no better than the vermin-type Pokemon many owned.

Grunts in black suits, a boldly scarlet "R" emblazoned on their abdomens, were standing guard behind various corners—and the moment my feet hit the floor, two of them jumped me.

_Jeez, Erika,_ I thought as two leering Team Rocket grunts lunged for me, both of them with their hands on their hips. I couldn't tell if they were threatening with firearms or Pokemon, but they were definitely about to pull something out on me. _You really sent me into a death trap here, huh?_

One of them—one with a cigarette dangling from slack lips, which I wanted to yank from his mouth and pull a drag on it—smiled in an oily way me, causing my skin to ripple like scummy pond water.

"Hey, you must be the 'little visitor' that Rob and Brent ran in here yellin' about," he said, and his buddy, who had more than a five o' clock shadow, laughed.

"Yeah… beat 'em both, didn't you? But we'll see if you're luck'll hold out with _us_."

Before I could offer any protest, their hands flew to their belts. I was tense, prepared to dodge gunshots, but their hands gripped enlarged Poke Balls. _This, I can work with,_ I thought, brushing my own with my fingernails.

The men chose their Pokemon simultaneously, the light releasing stereotypical "evil" Pokemon—Pokemon that I had owned sometime in my own life, in fact—Rattata and Zubat.

Kashen and Frederick emerged on my side. I was eager to crush these insects, so I could get my way to the queen bee—the head of the gang, the king of the castle, etc. I needed to get to Giovanni. I'd crush whoever I needed to to make that happen.

My Charmeleon took the Rattata head on; his feet left the ground as he launched for the little rat. Simultaneously, its quick white feet brought it ramming into Kashen's chest. Claws flashed in the light, as did teeth; blood rained upon the nicely mopped floor. There was a brief scuffle, but Kashen withdrew long enough to breathe a line of fire into the Rattata's face.

Scorched and slashed, the Rattata collapsed, while Kashen triumphantly stepped over it, placing a single foot on its labored sides.

On the other side of me, my protective rock, Frederick, was staring down the eyeless Zubat. It swept at him, Supersonic spiraling from its open jaws, but he didn't hear the shrill noise and tossed heavy stones at the flying venom bag. The biggest ones fell atop it, pinning its wings and its breath to the floor.

Like others before them, the two Rocket grunts stood, in awe of how quickly their Pokemon were pulverized. They looked taken aback, began to look at me in a sharper, more analytical way. I wasn't in the mood for incredulity.

"You wanna be next?" I snarled. Kashen's nostrils flared, smoke curling from them as though he were a true dragon, guarding ancient treasure from chivalrous fools. Frederick moved protectively in front of me, cracking all twenty of his knuckles as he did so.

Both of them shook their heads slowly, cockiness evaporated like mist in a gale.

_Good._

"Then do me a favor."

They were silent, but the one with the Rattata nodded. The Zubat guy was staring frightfully at Kashen, who was grinning back in a 'charming' way.

"Tell Giovanni to be ready for me."

'Cause, boy, was I ready for him.

* * *

The puzzles in the hideout were for amateurs. I was no wiz in school, but really, who _couldn't_ figure out the sliding floor thing?

I won't go into detail with the rest of their booby trap-laden basement, but I will say I battled several Rockets. Zubat and Golbat fell to their electrifying deaths with Flitz's quick bolts. Frederick crushed. Xander sliced.

Kashen was strolling alongside me, the most intimidating Pokemon I owned, a young crimson dragon, the flame on his tail bright and his temper as hot as any Fire type move he could use. I annihilated several Rockets, sent them all scurrying back into the rat hole they nested in—wherever that was—and, finally, found something one dropped.

A key.

"Charr," Kashen said, nodding to the broken elevator I'd been locked out of.

A lift key.

"Damn straight. Looks like we'll find that bastard, after all, Kashen," I said, smiling to myself and approaching the elevator.

It was a little dilapidated-looking, but I decided to go on in anyways. Fitting the key into the lock, it slowly came open. I glanced at Kashen, who was afraid of the dark but not small places (that was Xander), then we both entered.

When it shut, I closed my eyes, nervousness lancing through my heart.

I was going to fight this guy.

And who knew what was going to happen.

Haphazardly, the elevator struggled to climb, and, finally, it made it, the doors creaking open with a _ding_.

Outside, two Rockets stood guard, but clean-shaven and with identical pale, gray-eyed faces. These two were not grunts—they were dressed in suits, still black, but with the visible insignia of "R" missing from their uniforms.

Kashen growled beside me, prepared to fight, as was I.

These two were guarding the door that I needed to get through.

"Halt! Are you—"

"Leaf Brannigan, at your service," I said, not wanting to chat it up with these freaks. "Fight me, and move, or else."

"Only if you win," the other sneered.

"I doubt otherwise."

He drew his Pokemon, one that impressed me in size and appearance. Yellow and desert-rat like, the rough scales had been replaced by long, rippling spines that spiked along its back threateningly. The tiny paws were replaced by scissor-like claws. What Tradden had never gotten to be—a Sandslash.

"Kashen… maybe Xander should do this," I said, shaking my head slightly. He had almost been a casualty in Erika's gym, due to his stubbornness, and maybe I should have just withdrawed him right then.

But, I didn't.

"Charr," he denied, jumping forward.

The executive's eyes gleamed.

"Interesting choice," he mused, but I was about to show him just how interesting.

"Kashen, Slash!"

Quickly, Kashen dove for the Sandslash and drew his claws along the underside of his belly. Blood spotted the yellow-gold fur of the Ground type, and it squealed in pain, looking confused.

"Sandslash, Dig!" The executive directed, voice cold. The Sandslash attempted to rise, but I was quicker.

"Kashen, Flamethrower!"

The jet of fire knocked the Sandslash over, and it was knocked unconscious.

I reached over to stroke Kashen's horn—a favorite spot of his—when, suddenly, the fire on his tail flickered. Flickered, as a candle in a strong wind, and, instead of going out, it swept out into his body—writhing, dancing, then rapidly whirling, a tornado of flames.

"…Kashen?" I asked, awed, as the fire swirled around him, not burning anything but the ground below his feet.

The fire became white, shimmery, the fire of evolution. The light expanded, grew taller, grew wings, and I watched in awe as my closest friend became a Charizard.

The light died away, and I admired the two long horns from his head, the pale orange color of his warm skin, the immense, powerful wings sprouting from his shoulder blades with the felt-like green flesh within the folds. I admired the powerful tail swinging behind him, capped in the same crowning flame of his childhood.

I grinned slowly.

"Kashen…"

He no longer made the _char_ chirp of his youth, or the _charr_ growl of his adolescence. Now he made a deep-throated grumble that can have no imitation, no onomatopoeia.

The other executive's hand trembled as he chose his Pokemon. An enormous purple cobra appeared, intimidating, designs made to resemble eyes on its hood glaring back at me while its own small glare gleamed. Arbok, the evolution of Ekans, was usually a daunting foe.

But I had no fear—I never had, and I certainly didn't now.

Kashen stepped forward, his foot making a harsh smack on the linoleum floor. He spread his wings and roared directly into the Arbok's face.

"Kashen, Wing Attack!" I cried. His wings stiffened, and he smacked the Arbok powerfully with each of them, first the right, then the left.

The executive looked grim. "Arbok, rise! Bite!"

The battered snake coiled, preparing to lunge forward, but I smirked, knowing what the final move would be. "Flamethrower!"

The charred Arbok fell to the ground, uttering a strangled "_chahh,_" before it collapsed.

The gate opened—and in the shadows of a tilted lamp, I saw Giovanni.

* * *

I'm not going to say I was prepared for the man I saw. Handsome in a dark panther's way, a mystery clouding his sharp eyes, Giovanni was young, well-dressed, with an impeccably calm grace that allowed him to laze in his chair, watching me with a well-fed cat's lazy but sharp eyes.

"So. You've come, at last. The infamous girl who has managed to singlehandedly thwart two of my investigations," he said, though, to my surprise, he didn't sound angry at all. Just the opposite, in fact.

I couldn't let myself be fooled. _This is the man who has slain Pokemon, corrupted trainers, ruined my journey._

"Call me Leaf," I said, prepared to be as rude and insolent as possible. "And before you start yakking any more, you might want to choose a Pokemon."

He smiled pityingly.

"Dear Leaf, do you really think you can defeat us? Defeat _me_?" He did, however, choose a Poke Ball—an odd-looking one, purple, with an "M" on the capsule. _What could that mean?_

"I don't know what I think half the time. But I _know_ I can wipe that shit-eating grin off your face," I growled, and that did it. A wire—stretched taut behind his eyes, one of self-control—snapped, and I could see it happen. His mouth tightened.

"Very well. Let's see if that's true."

He chose Rhyhorn, who pawed the earth, preparing for his charge. Rhyhorn was an enormous pachyderm-like creature, made entirely of jagged rock and stone, with a large horn protruding from its face.

I smiled.

"Go, Frederick!"

My Graveler landed heavily, breaking the floor with his stone body. The two Rock types stared each other down. The Rhyhorn prepared to charge as Giovanni leaned back in his chair, templing his fingers beneath his chin.

Frederick, perhaps, wasn't as fast as Rhyhorn, but he had something it didn't.

"Magnitude, Frederick!"

The earth rippled, and a powerful tide of Ground power shook the Rhyhorn down to his knees. Giovanni wordlessly withdrew him, sending out something medium-sized and pink with a long horn on its head: Nidorino.

Being a Poison type, I began to smile. What was this? Giovanni was truly this much of a fool? I had come in here thinking our battle would be difficult, grueling, even—but this was embarrassing.

"Magnitude again!"

Frederick pounded the ground. The Magnitude was, albeit, weaker, but it still swept the Nidorino away with a super-effective blast.

Giovanni's smile became cold as he called Nidorino back into its ball. He chose his final Pokemon: an enormous brown marsupial, with a scowling face and a pale stomach with a pouch. Resting inside the pouch was an insipid baby.

Kangaskahn, I realized; I had never seen one in person before, as they were rare and only open for capture in the Safari Zone in Fuchsia City, where they were even more rare. Where had Giovanni obtained one?

"Kangaskahn, Fake Out!"

"Frederick, uh…" It was no use. With its move, Kangaskahn flashed over to where my Graveler stood, and smashed him in the face with a flying fist. While damaging very little, Frederick was thrown off.

"Shit." I stepped back, wondering what the Kangaskahn could do. After all, I'd never seen one fight before. Did it know Fighting moves? I'd heard they could Surf, too. I glanced at Frederick, who was standing in front of me, looking determined to serve and protect his master: me.

I wasn't going to risk anything.

"Return, Frederick!" I pulled out the first Poke Ball at my belt: the oldest one, visibly dull and scratched up from use.

"Go, Kashen!"

The light flooded the 'stadium', which wasn't much more than Giovanni's office. My newly evolved Charizard stood before the Kangaskahn, slightly taller and much bulkier, what with the added weight and height of the wings.

"Kashen, use Flamethrower!"

"Kangaskahn, Bite!"

The flames spread around the Kangaskahn's body as it flew towards Kashen for a hefty punch. My Charizard caught the fist, holding it there. Their eyes met, burned into each other, and I could feel an unspoken rivalry raging between them. A reflection of my hatred for Giovanni's, and of Giovanni's will to conquer all with no opposition.

The Team Rocket Pokemon did not act as most of them did. Kangaskahn was a tool, but it was an effective tool, and it knew it.

"Kashen, finish this! Fly!"

His wings pounded the air, then caught as he took flight to the ceiling. He swooped around the room, circling the frustrated Kangaskahn.

Giovanni didn't command his Pokemon further. He met my eyes, shaking his head.

"Well… Leaf. It looks like you've won this battle."

"Damn straight… but maybe you should wait until I finish off your Kangaskahn before you leave."

"I don't think so. I have another operation to attend to, if you'll excuse me…" He took out a Poke Ball and thrust it forward.

Kashen's eyes widened as he saw the red beam eclipse the Kangaskahn and envelop him, consuming his energy. He lunged to the floor, swooping low enough to hit the Normal type in the belly and finish him… but it was too late. He was sucked in a fraction of a second before hand, and Kashen hit the floor with a heavy crash, knocking desks and computers over.

Giovanni stood to leave, and I gritted my teeth, angry at myself for letting him get away, but knowing I couldn't stop him here.

"Wait! What _operation_?"

He turned over his shoulder, smiled.

"You want to find out so badly? Stop us?" He paused, then withdrew something from his pockets. He threw it to me, then kept walking.

"There. Find out for yourself."

I glanced down at the object. _Silph Scope_, it said on the side.

When I looked up again, Giovanni was gone.

* * *

"So you drove them out of my city?"

"Yes."

Erika shook her head, smiling in wonder. "You really are a blessing in disguise. Look, I don't have anything to repay you with, but—"

"I don't need anything. Look, they're still in Lavender Town. I don't need you to congratulate me. They're still _here_." I sighed, kicking dirt with my scuffed and dirty sneakers.

Erika moved away from the door of her gym, short hair swaying in the breeze.

"Maybe. But you can drive them out, Leaf."

"Guess we'll see, huh?"

I turned from her, unclenching my fists. Kashen was waiting, watching the skies. He turned as I approached him, closed his eyes as I reached up to stroke his long, slender neck and throat.

"Are you ready for this?"

He opened his eyes, stared down at me, his blue eyes glimmering in the red evening, in his long orange face.

The growl in his throat answered the question for me.

"Then let's go to Lavender Town." I hesitated. "You… you can take me there, can't you?"

He seemed to smirk at me, but in his fierce face, I could no longer tell. However, he lowered his head and neck to the ground, exposing his shoulders to me. I raised one leg and slid myself onto his back.

Kashen lifted his head, turning to smirk at me again. I could tell this time. It was his eyes, those burning blue eyes that always seemed to be laughing at me instead of with me. I smiled back and scratched between his horns.

"You asshole."

He spread his wings with heavy, exaggerated force, and leapt into the air, no running start required. The cold skies looked heated, but chilled me as he ascended, climbing the sun with little effort. Celadon City became specks beneath us, Kashen and I, as we flew towards the tower that was now below us.

Pokemon Tower—home of lonely ghosts, buried dead, forgotten dreams.


	21. Happy?

**Locke and Key:** _A Nuzlocke Story_

* * *

In this hole, that is me;  
Left with a heart exhausted.  
What's my release?  
What sets me free?  
Do you pull me up just to push me down again?

Peel me from the skin;  
Tear me from the rind.  
Does it make you happy now?  
Tear meat from the bone;  
Tear me from myself.  
Are you feeling happy now?  
-Mudvayne, "Happy?"; _Lost and Found._

* * *

The blood had dried on the cracked white floor, and there were still bone fragments from the shattered skull of Cubone's mother scattered around the damaged tombstones. The Ghost Pokemon had fled from the top floors after the commotion – namely, after Marowak's death.

I could see that now – thanks to Erika and my encounter with Giovanni. I wore the Silph Scope on a chain around my neck, and when I heard a noise around me, I simply lifted it to my right eye to see what was _really_ looming over my shoulder.

Well, that was how it was supposed to work, anyways. I hadn't run into a single Pokemon so far, and I wasn't really sure if I wanted to. Ghost types were hard to work with, having many weaknesses and only two advantages, and they'd be easy to lose in the gyms to come.

I sighed, letting the scope fall to my chest when I realized there was nothing near me once again.

"Trode, electrode," the large sphere rolling near my feet chirped. I lowered my gaze to see him staring fervently at a tombstone near the staircase where I had seen Marowak's ghost. The tombstone was smashed, pieces of it near the base mixed with the Ground type's tacky maroon blood.

"What's there, Flitz?" I was reluctant to go over there. Seeing Marowak again was the _last_ thing I wanted to do, and I hoped I wouldn't have to, but… somehow I was sure I would meet it again.

Flitz rolled his eyes, then rolled over to the broken gravesite to investigate. _At least someone here's brave,_ I thought.

"Elec?" His voice carried a question with it as he peered around it. Then – _whack!_ – a huge bone was whipped out from the dark of the grave stone and pounded on Flitz's head. He cried out, "_Trode_!", before I ran over, alarmed.

"What the hell was that? Flitz, are you alright? That… that was a super-effective hit," I realized mid-sentence. That made me glance back at the tombstone… and with renewed terror. _Marowak…_

"Electrode!" Flitz growled, his anger kindled. To take his mind off the blow, I pulled out a fresh water I'd bought in the PokeMall and let him sip from it, my eyes still fixated on the grave.

"Come on out, Marowak… we're ready for you now." My voice was cautious.

_Here it comes…_

"Cuuu." The voice was quiet, not deep or intimidating. Instead, it was high-pitched… and afraid.

"Trode?" Flitz glanced up at me questioningly.

"It's not Marowak," I murmured, realizing it myself. "It's Cubone."

It tottered out, small and trembling, despite its brave front. It wielded its weapon—Marowak's bone, no doubt, for it was far too big for the Cubone's little brown paws—and threatened Flitz with it again.

"Cubone, bone!" It said. Its paws shook around the thick base of the bone. Despite myself, I felt my heart melt through my chest for the little creature.

_This little Cubone… it's an orphan. It lost its mother to Team Rocket's evil, destructive grunts. I doubt it trusts any humans now, or any Pokemon but the Ghosts in this tower._

I shook my head. "I can't hurt it, Flitz."

He turned to me, one eyebrow raised. "Elec?"

"No…" I pulled a Great Ball out, clenching it tightly. "But it's the first Pokemon I ran into here. So I'll take it with us."

I threw the Ball, expecting it to eclipse the trembling little orphan and bring her to my waiting hand.

In reality, the Cubone readied the bone like a bat and swatted the Ball back at me, hitting me in the cheek with a surprising force.

"_Ouch_!" I cried, pulling it off of my face. "You little bitch!"

Flitz seemed to cackle, and he _definitely_ rolled his eyes.

"Okay, fine. Sonicboom!"

Flitz's attack did little damage, as planned, but in retaliation, the Cubone ran at him again with its bone.

"Uhh… you can take the hit, right? It's only level 17."

Flitz glared at me, then managed to dodge the blow at the last second. The Cubone, panting, was now standing near my feet. It glared up at me, eyes cold and still somewhat fearful through the holes of its skull.

I tried a different tactic, hoping it could understand my speech.

"Just hold still." I sighed, then knelt down. It looked as though it wanted to swat my face with its bone, but it didn't - there was hope yet.

"I'm not with Team Rocket… in fact, I'm here to destroy them. You can come with me, and avenge your mother… or you can stay here and wait for death with these old harmless ghosts."

It paused, then blinked rapidly. I realized that there were tears in its eyes, that it was trying to be brave and not shed them in front of anyone. _I can relate,_ I thought, and, feeling a little sad myself, I held the Great Ball in front of me, gesturing to the Cubone with it.

"Cubone. We can make Team Rocket pay together."

"Cuu," it said mournfully, a cry that was lonely and sad. A cry that reassured me.

I touched the Great Ball to its nose and watched as it consumed the little Ground type. It shook once, then stopped, resigned, without anymore struggling.

"Flitz…" I looked up, smiling slightly. He was watching, the skeptical look replaced by one of slight respect. "Meet our newest team member… Dusty."

Flitz's mouth turned into that wide grin many Electrode display, showing his pleasure. He was probably the most easygoing of my Pokemon, accepting new teammates with "open arms", so to speak. You know, since he's a rolling electrical ball, but still.

_I hope he never has to lose any of his friends,_ I thought, pulling out the Great Ball he was contained in… but I didn't quite return him before I detected movement near the top of the stairs. In the darkness beyond the steps, I could see one gleaming eye… and I knew that Dusty's mother, the dead Marowak queen, was here.

_We have to defeat it,_ I realized, shaking my head. _If we defeat it, it'll rest, won't it?_

It was worth a try.

"Flitz… I don't know if you can handle this," I said, glancing at my Electrode. Sure enough, his face had gone worried. Electrode versus Marowak wasn't exactly a fair battle.

"Trode," he rumbled. I recalled him quickly, pulling out the only other Pokemon I could fight the Ground type with.

"Gol, golbat!" Xander cried, landing heavily and folding his wings around him.

I shook my head slightly. "She can't hurt you with her bone attacks, Xander. And… no matter how scary she looks… remember… she's just a—"

I heard shuffling ahead. I glanced up quickly, my heart beginning to pound for fear of looking her in the face. But there was nothing there.

The shadows shifted around me, behind me—and then I could feel something at my back.

The unblinking red eye in the ragged, broken half-skulled face glared into me as I slowly turned around. The horrific grin of the skull beneath the Marowak's skull-protected face—the one that gave it it's structure, the one that all man and Pokemon have beneath their faces—was smiling up at me.

Blood. Bone. Torn flesh. Stale misery, agony, screams gone unheard by anyone but her own daughter and the men who shot her… her death reeled in my head, her dead memories blending into my brain, melding like soft candle wax into a bowl of voodoo.

My blood ran cold. _Dusty. Oh my god._

"X-Xander," I managed, backing away, trying to tear my eyes away from the Marowak's gruesome visage. "A-Aerial Ace... now…"

He turned as I said his name, seeing the Marowak's furious spirit. Instead of displaying fear, as Flitz had, his face contorted with a different emotion: rage. Whether it was because she was threatening me or simply because she was his opponent for the moment, I couldn't tell, and I don't presume to flatter myself, but Xander launched himself at her, wing slicing into her.

The Marowak flashed to the left of Xander, obviously injured, though not spilling any blood. Instead of attacking, it grabbed Xander and pulled it forward, staring into his eyes with its single red orb.

Xander went stiff – not from paralysis or any other infliction, but from fear.

_This needs to end now… if not, this Marowak will never rest._

"Xander, return!" I pulled out his Poke Ball, recalling his stiff, frozen body. The Marowak turned to me, raising its club. _Now she can use it… on me._

_Oh HELL no. New tactic._

"Go… Dusty!"

My new Cubone emerged, and her eyes looked confused until they landed on the enraged spirit before her. Dusty's face didn't look afraid or pained, as my other Pokemon had—as mine had. Instead, they lit up with a joy I doubted I'd ever see in her face again.

"Cu, cubone!" She cried, and, unwittingly, she ran to her mother's ravaged ghost.

The Marowak didn't move. It accepted Dusty's fervent hug, but when she touched it, it vanished into thin air.

"Cu…bone?" Dusty fell to where her mother had stood, looking confused and heartbroken.

I was confused, too. Where had the bitch gone?

As if to answer my cursing thoughts, a heavy blow caught the backs of my knees. With a cry—one more of surprise than pain, I think—I fell, turning wildly to see what had stricken me.

Not surprisingly, Marowak stood, threatening me with the club—but instead of hitting me, the Marowak grabbed me by my shirt, as she had done to Xander, and dragged me forward. Up close and personal, I could see the bullet that the skinny Team Rocket man had shot into her face, and I had to hold back my vomit.

"Maro… Marowak," it whispered, and, shockingly, the voice echoed in my head with words in human speech.

_Don't let her become weak._

"I… I won't," I stammered.

She stood, stared at me, then nodded.

"Waaak," the Marowak intoned.

_Finish me off with her._

Without looking behind me, I commanded, still stunned by what was going on but not enough to keep me from doing what I needed to do: "Bone Club."

Dusty—already riveted by the loyalty a Pokemon feels when bonded with a Ball to a trainer—rose, grasping her mother's lost club—the one she'd had as a living Pokemon. She reluctantly raised the club, then whacked her mother's image with it.

It immediately faded, instead of flashed, and I knew that Marowak had left the world we live in.

Dusty sat where her mother had stood and began to cry, but I didn't go to comfort her. I was chilled by her mother's words.

_That little Cubone watched her mother die by brutal humans. Is there no compassion in what's left of your heart when you die? Or… is Marowak helping Dusty the best she could?_

I knelt beside Dusty, my own heart aching. What I'd witnessed was a true tragedy, but I couldn't let me stop me from what I had to do. If anything, I had to use it as fuel for my fire, and I had to persuade Dusty to do the same thing.

"Your mother did her best to make you want to rid this tower of Team Rocket. This was your mother's kingdom, and now it's yours. We have to take it back… for her, and for the other dead Pokemon here."

Dusty didn't look at me. She stood up, picked up her mother's club.

"Cuu," she said quietly.

We went up the stairs at long last, and just before we reached the final floor, I realized that Dusty hadn't looked back at all.

_Is that what her mother was teaching her? Teaching me?_

_To keep going, despite the tragedy of loss?_

I had already learned that lesson… hadn't I?

* * *

"Please, god, spare us…" The Rocket grunt pleaded, his voice high pitched and whining.

"Where's Giovanni?" I snarled, pulling him up by the dark collar of his stupid black uniform. His hat had fallen off, and lay where the mangled body of his Zubat lie, beaten into exhaustion by Dusty's Headbutt.

"Giovanni ain't here… he hasn't been here the whole ti—"

"_Cubone!_" Dusty picked up her bone and whacked him on the leg. Tears started streaming from his pale and bloodshot eyes.

"Dusty, enough." She was trembling, I saw. With fury.

Behind her, Kashen made a deep-throated growl and lifted her into his arms, holding her angry, writhing little body still.

"Giovanni said he had another operation to attend to. How could this _not_ be it?" I demanded. I had a sinking feeling in my stomach. It looked as though I had assumed wrongly.. again.

"There's…" he wheezed, "Another."

"_Where_?"

His eyes took in the Charizard and the Cubone behind me, and he shuddered, giving up his organization's secrets at long last.

"Saffron."

I let out my breath slowly. _How could I have been so stupid? It's Silph Co. he's talking about. The Silph Scope… it was all for this. But why?_

"Thank you. Get out of here. And let Giovanni know that I'm still coming. When I get there next, I'll be a much worse opponent to contend with."

As I watched the man leave, I didn't doubt that he'd deliver the message. But why had I come here, only to find that there were a few Rocket grunts with underleveled Pokemon? Only to find that Mr. Fuji hadn't been kidnapped, but had come to contend with these vermin himself?

I sighed, then approached the old man, who was kneeling before the only grave at the top of the tower.

"Who's that stone for?" I asked.

"My closest friend, who died of old age." He sighed. "I wasn't the greatest of Pokemon trainers, mind you, but I could hold my own. I wasn't any Samuel Oak, but I made it to the Pokemon League."

At his mentioning of Professor Oak, I jumped a little. "Were you and Oak rivals?"

Fuji laughed. "Oh, heavens no. Anytime I challenged Oak, he'd smoke me completely! I could barely even defeat one of his Pokemon, much less his entire team. But Agatha—oh, there was a girl who could hold her own against Oak! Why, I remember…"

Okay. I was interested, but I had some business to attend to.

"…Agatha's Pokemon were all caught here, too, you know. Right here in this tower! Gosh, what a fiery little pistol she was!" He chuckled. "And still is. Ahh, those were the days…"

"Mr. Fuji… this Cubone I caught. Dusty. I was hoping you would take care of her for me."

He frowned.

"Why, girl, of course I could. But you captured her. Why would you forfeit her?"

I hadn't wanted to talk this out. But I should have known better. My eyes on the floor, I replied, "She's been hurt. A lot. Don't ask me how I know, but… I do. And she'll only get more hurt if she stays with me. She deserves love, and safety. Not a bloody death."

He was quiet for a moment. Then, turning from the tombstone of his lost Pokemon, he stared me in the eye. "Is this Cubone the child of the Marowak that Team Rocket shot and killed?"

"Yes."

"My child… this Cubone does not want peace and safety." He looked at the Great Ball I held in my hands, and, as he examined it, I handed it over. He ran his wrinkled old fingers over it, very practiced hands that had held many Poke Balls in his life.

"She doesn't?" I blinked. "But then…"

"She wants revenge. She wants to grow stronger, as her mother wanted her to, and she wants vengeance for what innocence was lost in her." He thoughtfully stared into the Great Ball, as if contemplating the violence in my little Cubone's soul. "She was the daughter of the caretaker of this tower. Now there will be none. I'll have to do my best to find a replacement."

"But, Mr. Fuji… she'll get her vengeance. She'll grow stronger. But what if she dies?" I hadn't wanted to voice my real fear, but when I did, it hung in the air, frozen. I continued, my voice softer. "What if she meets a fate like her mother did?"

"Why, girl, everyone dies. If anyone knows that... it is I." He stood slowly, looking around the tower that he so diligently cared for. Through rain or snow, through crime or celebration, Mr. Fuji cared for these graves, consoled grieving young trainers. _Yes, if anyone knows that, it's him... but it's also me._

He continued, "Whether it's an honorable death in battle, as you may have lost, a brutal death by murder, as Marowak met, or an old death in security, as my dear friend did…" he closed his eyes slowly. "Does it matter in the end? Pokemon and people, we all seek something in our lives. If we can't satiate that hunger that drives us all through our existence, than what is the point of living at all?"

* * *

My five Pokemon stood beside me as I completed the last grave stone.

Grigori. My first loss. Tradden. Team Rocket's fault. Yenra. A sad death. Aero. My fault. Marlen. The turning point. Tobias. The brave death. Leroy. The breaking point.

Before me were the empty graves of my old friends, all of the Pokemon I'd lost on my journey.

Behind me were the survivors, the ones who had helped me through all of those losses, many who would continue to.

Frederick. My protector. Dusty. My protection. Flitz. My light. Xander. My stability. Kashen. My best friend, the one I'd started this journey with.

When I left Lavender Town, I wasn't leaving them behind me.

But Marowak's intentions were clear.

They weren't meant for me, but they may as well have been.

I was going to Fuchsia City to challenge Koga, and the timing couldn't have been better.

* * *

**Current Team:**

Charizard: "Kashen" – Male, Level 36

Golbat: "Xander" – Male, Level 36

Electrode: "Flitz" – Level 35

Graveler: "Frederick" – Male, Level 36

Cubone: "Dusty" – Female, Level 25


	22. Time Was Never On My Side

**Locke and Key: **_A Nuzlocke Story_

A/N: Wow! Thanks for all the reviews, guys! :)  
This chapter didn't quite leave off where the last one did. I forgot that I had to train Dusty before I fought Koga. It's so hard to keep these events straight, since I already beat the game. Heh.  
Anyways, enjoy.

* * *

You make me smash the clock and feel  
I'd rather die behind the wheel.  
Time was never on my side,  
So now I wait my whole lifetime.  
-Metallica, "The Outlaw Torn"; _Load._

* * *

I was traveling south of Lavender in a hard, soaking rain, cold as anything that could come out of an Ice type's mouth. The bridge beneath me was wet and rotted, the wind was slapping my damp, freezing hair into my face, long and dark from the wind's spray, and all of the trainers around me wielded Water types.

Dusty walked in front of me, resilient despite the storm, growing impatient and eventually infuriated when I withdrew her before the Goldeen and Horsea we were fighting. She hadn't fought a single battle to date by herself, but how could she?

"Cu, cubone!" She cried when I threatened to pull her Great Ball out. Before us was a flopping red and white goldfish, staring blankly at us, but I knew the fuckers had super-effective moves.

"Sorry, Dusty, no can do. Flitz can take care of this much more easily."

"Bone…" She glared up at me, perhaps hoping to cow me into submitting to her will, but I returned her without blinking an eye.

Like a fucking Cubone is going to boss me around.

Flitz emerged from his own Great Ball and Shock Wave'd the Goldeen into a toasted unconscious state. Fueled by the rain and the battle, he whirled around me, spinning happily.

I watched him, tilting my head down slightly so the rain would collect on the brim of my not-so-white-anymore hat and help shield my numb face. "I think Dusty hates you, buddy."

I tend to despise bridges after my last experience on one, but this bridge was not a feat. Fisherman who knew that many Water types were more likely to bite in the rain loitered around me, ignoring the freezing downpour to get their catches. Although I wasn't too happy that I couldn't train Dusty like I'd wanted to, she was still leveling up, and, hey, it'd been awhile before we'd had a casualty.

Things really were looking up, though I hated to admit it.

After an hour in the storm, we spotted a building that ate the remainder of the long, winding old bridge. A turnpike of sorts, I realized as I stared through the gray sheet of rain that blinded me.

"Let's go in there and dry off," I said, glancing down to see if the idea was approved. Flitz looked happy, but Dusty crossed her arms and muttered, "Bone." There was no pleasing that uppity little bitch, you know?

Once inside, I noticed something that I'd never seen before in one of the buildings: a staircase leading up.

"Hey, bet there's something worth my time up there."

Wrong.

...Sorta.

Two people—kids, really—sat upstairs, one playing with his Pokemon, the other reading a book. Didn't actually look like it was worth my time, on second thought, but before I could leave, they both looked up.

"Hey," the one with a Nidorina on his lap said, "Can I interest you in a trade? Nidorino for Ms. Nido?"

"No, thanks," I said, curling my lip. I hated people who traded their Pokemon. "I don't have Nidorino." _And I don't need Nidorina,_ I thought, looking at the forlorn blue Poison type on her master's lap.

The other guy seemed to smile.

"If you look through those binoculars, you can usually see something interesting," he mused, raising one eyebrow at something in his comic.

I'd humor him.

I peered through one set of binoculars and saw something I'd seen too much of in the past week: Pokemon Tower, looming through the fog and the heavy rain. I looked away quickly, wondering if I should even bother to look into the other set.

Alas, I did. I peered through the lens, and was shocked by the flash of sparkling blue I saw when I did. A long-bodied, elegant bird with a huge wingspan and shimmering blue feathers was soaring through the driving rain, its tail a ribbon of sapphire lingering behind the harsh talons.

A beautiful Pokemon, perhaps the most beautiful one I'd ever seen, had graced my eyes with its divine presence.

"What… what was that?" I choked, stepping back.

The boy playing with the Nidorina looked up, surprised. "You've never heard of the ice bird that lives in the Seafoam Islands?"

"No," I breathed, too awed to be sarcastic. "What's it called?"

The boy put down his comic book. "Its name is Articuno. It dwells in a cave deep inside the Seafoam Islands. Many have captured it, but it always manages to escape and find its way back home."

"Articuno…"

"It has brothers, too. There's only one of each, but there is also a bird of lightning named Zapdos and a phoenix, a Fire type, named Moltres."

"Where do they live?"

"Zapdos hides out in the Power Plant, but I don't know where Moltres lives." He paused. "I heard it doesn't even fly in Kanto anymore."

_How disappointing… I'd love to see Zapdos and Moltres, too,_ I thought, and then I realized what I wanted to do. I wanted to find them and battle them, all three of them—not destroy them, but defeat them, and witness their moves in combat against my own team.

"If you're thinking of capturing them, good luck," said the Nidorina guy. "They're all level 50, and they all designed traps and mazes for trainers who think they can catch them."

"It's pretty dangerous," the comic book guy warned. "Zapdos is very violent, and Articuno is very determined."

"Don't worry about it," I heard myself say to them. "It's not like I'm going to find them, or anything."

* * *

I soon got to the other side of the bridge, and what did I see?

An enormous Pokemon, lazing on its back, blocking the path from this bridge to the city behind it. Vermilion City, I think.

"What the hell?" I realized it was a Snorlax before long, and recalled the item Mr. Fuji had given me for saving the tower from Team Rocket.

_This PokeFlute will awaken any sleeping Pokemon._ A great tool, making it so that I didn't have to buy Awakenings anymore. But now I got an idea, and pulled the long, slim cylinder out.

As I played the flute—badly, of course; I never presumed to be a musician—the Snorlax began to stir, then rose, frowning heavily upon being awakened.

"Snorlaaaaxxx," he boomed in a baritone voice. He resembled a fox-shaped bear, with a grumpy face and sleepy eyes.

"Dusty, you ready for this?" I asked the Cubone at my side.

Of course she was. With a fighting spirit similar to Tobias', she always proved ready for any circumstance, whether the battle was in her favor or not.

"Okay—Headbutt!"

Dusty launched herself forward, thrusting her hard head into the Snorlax's tummy—and was flung out of the pudgy gut, back onto the ground near my feet.

I was loathe to see that Snorlax was barely fazed.

"Okay… return, Dusty," I said, as Snorlax immediately used Rest and healed himself, while also falling asleep.

"Go, Kashen!"

My Charizard appeared, almost matching the now sleeping and fully-healed Snorlax in size. "Flamethrower!"

To my chagrin, Snorlax's Special Defense was just as high as his Defense.

"…Fly?"

The two turn attack was enough, and Snorlax was awake again.

The mighty blue and cream creature rose slowly, as if the effort pained it, and launched itself in a frightening Headbutt at Kashen. Surprised, he attempted to hold it off, and his talons dug into the earth and created furrows where he was dragged backwards.

"This is ridiculous," I snapped, beginning to fume. "Use Slash. Finish this!"

Struggling with the Snorlax's massive (but thankfully underleveled) weight, He raised one thin arm and hooked his long claws over the Normal type's bulging soft belly.

It roared in outraged agony, but, much to my relief, it collapsed, one clumsy paw clutching the gaping mouth in its stomach.

Kashen was panting, heavily exerted from defeating the level 30 sleeping beast.

He made a low groan, then stumbled backwards, staring with disgust at his blooded claws and at the wound in the Snorlax's abdomen.

"Hey… we did it," I said, cheered up considerably. I ran up to Kashen, prepared to wrap my arms around his neck and hug him close.

He growled, pushing me away with his clean claws.

"He's not dead, buddy. He'll be okay. Some trainer will probably come along, find him wounded, and capture him…"

He made another sound of displeasure, and I sighed, rolling my eyes. Simultaneously, I pulled out a Great Ball and tossed it at the wounded Snorlax.

Ridiculous? Maybe. It wasn't like I could catch anything else on that route besides Magikarp and Goldeen, and, hey, Kashen's temper was something I didn't want to deal with at the moment.

It rolled once, twice, then stilled.

"It's going in the box, you know."

"_Rrr,_" he growled shortly, grunting with approval.

* * *

I was finally ready to go down Cycling Road. I knew there were tough bikers, people with bad attitudes and bad Pokemon, but honestly, I felt like I was prepared. An aggressive Charizard, a frantic Golbat, a laidback Electrode, a protective Graveler and a furious Marowak were plenty enough to keep me armed.

Or so I thought.

I had Dusty by my side, now taller, pale tawny with a graceful, slim skull that fit her head perfectly. Now the long, slender bone that she'd carried as a Cubone fit her deft paw.

She was the image of her dead mother – not the phantasm I'd seen and battled, but the one I'd never met. The one I knew had loved Dusty, protected the tower, and valiantly strove to drive Team Rocket from her home.

The one Dusty could never be, not now that she was damaged.

_Damaged as I am, maybe more than I am,_ I mused, watching her face off against a Weezing. The biker behind us grinned, cracking his knuckles, the lightened rain bouncing off of his bald head.

"Can't hit me with Ground moves," he sneered.

"No, but I can do this. Dusty, Headbutt!"

Dusty narrowed her eyes and launched herself at the Weezing, baring her skull to smash into it and, despite its heavy defense, do a significant amount of damage. It coughed, then seemed to grin.

The biker mimicked that grin, and, for the life of me, I should have known what that grin meant.

"Self-Destruct, Weezing," the biker commanded, and the Weezing's eyes rolled back in its head on command and, well, exploded.

The force of the explosion—a powerful blow that knocked Dusty flat, consumed her flesh and burned away her ferocity-surprised me, but I knew Dusty's fate as soon as the dust and debris cleared and I could see a slumped shadow in the midst of it.

_No… _"Dusty!" I cried out, amazed at the turn of events. I had just been battling with Dusty, training her, attempting to catch her up to the rest of my team. She had been giving me attitude just moments before this battle, had smacked a Rapidash into submission, as well as the second Snorlax, and had evolved into Marowak.

The Weezing, thankfully, was dead as well. In pieces, it was ignored by the raucous biker.

"No, no, Dusty, please… you just got here, and I… I saved you, you know? I saved you from the tower, from Team Rocket, and—"

I cut myself off there, bowing my head to silently sob. No tears escaped, no; my agony was dry as any desert south of Kanto, as any wind blowing through a ghost town.

I hadn't saved Dusty. I'd sentenced her to death. Just as I had warned Mr. Fuji…

"Maro… Marowak," Dusty managed, her eyes fluttering open weakly. I didn't get excited. The glaze was forming, and her sides were moving slowly. Not regularly, but so slow that I almost didn't notice her breathing at all.

I had seen too many friends die to not know that this was the end.

It really was.

I was startled at Dusty's words. They whirred in my head as her mother's had, but Dusty wasn't a ghost… she wasn't dead yet.

_Stop crying._

"…What?" I asked, surprised but not too alarmed. She struggled feebly away from me, falling on the ground instead of in my loosely wrapped arms.

"Maro… wak."

_It's a… weakness._

Then, suddenly and very off-topic, she murmured, "Maro."

_I died better than she did._

"How is this a better death? You're leaving me already," I said brokenly. I didn't want to sound this vulnerable, but Dusty's skin was growing cold, and the rain was still drizzling, frizzing my already damp hair and darkening the dry, dusty flesh of my Marowak.

"Marowak, wak."

_Maybe I'll see her._

"Do you want to?"

_Yes. Yes, I do. I want her to see that I took him with me._

She weakly attempted to gesture to the Weezing, but as she did, she seized up completely, and the paw holding the bone weakened. Her mother's bone fell with a soft _thud_ in the rain-dampened grass.

I realized that I hadn't heard her speak that last line aloud, in her Pokespeech, and, with the rain masking the brunt of my sorrow, I felt a single drop fall from my eye onto Dusty's skull.

She hadn't been with us long, with _me_ long, but I felt responsible for the death of an orphaned avenger who wanted nothing more than to become her mother's weapon. To unleash upon the world the fury she had held inside since Team Rocket shattered her life.

"She'll be proud of you… Dusty."

* * *

The ride to Fuchsia City down Cycling Road was forlorn and quiet.

On impulse, I avoided the trainers who leaned against their bikes on the side of the road, looking tough, or the ones pedaling at high speeds, seeking adrenaline rushes. I knew that somewhere in the next town, like it or not, I was going to keep and receive my fifth party member. And I'd have to have _somewhere_ to train him or her.

I had had to explain to my absent team what had happened to Dusty. They hadn't known her long enough to grieve, but managed a sad expression anyways. Dusty had been a bitch, but she'd had many reasons for the ways she'd acted… as anyone would.

Xander and Flitz had seemed noncommittal, one used to loss and the other not realizing the significance yet, but Frederick and Kashen had both looked concerned. Frederick meant nothing more than to protect me, but only Kashen knew the real pain in my heart. He'd seen as many losses as I had, after all. He'd been there for everyone, as a young Charmander, a reckless Charmeleon, and now his newly mature Charizard form.

I had recalled them all, knowing they wouldn't be able to walk beside me as I charged down Cycling Road. The scenery whipped past me, but honestly, all it consisted of was a gravel trail that my bike gunned through at high speeds, a sloping hill that allowed no mercy, and a fence that edged the whole road, all the way down.

By the time I reached the gates of Fuchsia, I was sore as well as exhausted, ravenous and angry. _Not_ a good combination. I was prepared to find somewhere to eat and hit the sack, when I realized there was a patch of grass just outside the city.

_This could be my chance…_

"Go, Xander." He fluttered beside me as I entered the grass, then paused as noise behind me made me whip around.

"Show yourself," I muttered, my fingers crossed behind my skirt.

But only a Pidgey stood, pecking the ground and staring up at us with a blank expression.

I gritted my teeth, anger making me see red. "Xander, Aerial Ace."

The blades of Flying type energy cut into the Pidgey, causing it to flinch, _kraww_ in pain, and take to the air, leaving feathers and small, rusty droplets to scatter down in its wake.

I watched it go, feeling an ache in my chest. Of sorrow and anger and disappointment. And who knows what else.

"Whatever," I muttered to Xander. "To Fuchsia we go, then."

I'd have to rely on the Safari Zone or the route outside Fuchsia, or I'd be in big trouble when we got to the Pokemon League. None of the Pokemon I had with me now would evolve anytime before then, and if I lost Xander now… my fourth caught Pokemon, successor to Grigori, the only member besides Kashen who remembered Tobias' flashing fangs and furious, fiery eyes… I didn't know what I'd do.

And Frederick, my strong protector, rock of solidity, avenger of Leroy. The underdog, the one I'd caught as a default and ended up seriously using. If I lost him, I'd be broken and angry, as I always was; who'd stand in front of me in dangerous battles, and who would hold my hand in the elevator when it went up, his cold, rocky, craggy fist enveloping my small chapped hand?

My others – Kashen and Flitz – I could count on.

I thought so then, anyways.

I can't predict for shit.


	23. This Could Be the Last Time

**Locke and Key: **_A Nuzlocke Story_

* * *

Sober mind, time now is gone  
They carved my body, not of stone  
A petty maze of emptiness  
And I said to hell with all the rest.  
This could be the last time  
That you will stand by my side.  
Well, I can say my soul is bleeding;  
Will you fly with me this evening?  
-3 Doors Down, "By My Side"; _The Better Life._

* * *

I was so used to traveling, so used to seeing cities and towns and gyms and trainers, that Fuchsia meant nothing more to me than the grave of Dusty. I barely noticed the stream of passersby that moved around me like trained fish in a dark sea, and the tallest of buildings were no more noticeable than the concrete beneath my feet.

Regardless, there wasn't much to see. The city wasn't all that large, and the main attractions were the Pokemon gym and the Safari Zone.

I knew where I needed to go – I needed to revive my team, catch another Pokemon, and train it up to where my other Pokemon were. Then I needed to fight and defeat Koga, and move on. Beyond Fuchsia was Saffron City, and an open ocean lay south of my hometown, which would take me to Cinnabar Island and the Seafoam Islands… home of Articuno.

But I didn't have it in me at the moment.

Instead of doing what I needed to do, I located the Pokemon Center and flopped onto the couch in the corner, disregarding the people's curious stares. What were they looking at? My dirty clothes, tangled hair, the motley array of capsules at my hip? Instead of challenging their rude stares, as I once would have done, I only pretended not to notice. My mother often told me that it made life easier.

I leaned back, feeling the springs in the couch dig into my spine, and I closed my eyes. Would anyone mind if I fell asleep here? I'd seen many a hobo nap on the couch, but it depended on the nurses… my thoughts grayed out, and, gradually, I drifted away.

"…Leaf?"

_What the hell?_

"Leaf, what are you doing?"

I groaned, then raised my head slowly, a disgruntled expression forming itself onto my face. Where was I? And who just woke me up?

I managed to focus my blurry eyes, then started, realizing it was Green who stood before me—Green Oak. _Great. Naturally, he had to find me napping on the couch in a Pokemon Center._

I blinked, then straightened my skirt, which was all sorts of sideways and backwards.

"Uh. Green. Hi. What are, uh, you doing here?"

He lowered his blue gaze to my legs, which were tucked beneath me. Self-consciously, I pulled them out and crossed them, attempting to be ladylike.

"Well, I, uh, came here to challenge the gym. I went in today, but the gym trainers wore out my team, so I'm going to try again tomorrow." He paused, surveyed me again, then repeated: "What are _you_ doing _here_?"

"Sleeping. What the fuck does it look like?" I shifted my eyes from his. So accusing, those eyes were, and I wasn't going to put up with his condescending bullshit.

Too bad. I got it anyways.

"You know, they have hotels here…" He trailed off, perhaps realizing that I was a time bomb with a short fuse.

"Do you have a point? I need that money."

Then, something totally unexpected happened. Green flipped me a small smile, one that was tight but not unkind, and said in a flippant way, "Well, why don't you stop by my room? There are two beds, and I'll be out training most of the time anyway. You'll probably get a decent sleep for once."

I blinked. Was this some kind of inadvertent yet painfully obvious method of getting in my pants? Before I could fire a retort, he shrugged fluidly and strolled out. He threw his room number over his shoulder like a master throwing his dog a bone: "Come by Room 333 if you want. If not, fine. I'm good either way."

I watched him walk out the door, eclipsed by the gray, morbid sunset outside. The doors shut, and I found myself watching him walk away.

…Then I realized what I was doing.

_Are you a fucking _idiot_? Why are you even _considering_ going to Green's room? Don't you know that ranks up there on the _Worst Ideas Ever _list somewhere around genocide and slapping Officer Jenny in the face? _

So… why did I find myself repeating "333" over and over in my head, as if to remember the useless little number?

* * *

"Hello. Welcome to the Safari Zone."

For now, I had the good sense to get my priorities straight—fill the gap in my team, the gap that had been swallowing my motivation whole. I'd pushed Green's unexpected offer to the back of my brain, instead concerning myself with matters that actually mattered.

The lazy-eyed blond receptionist smiled keenly at me, eager to pocket my good money. I suspiciously peered beyond him, into the gate. All I could see were gray skies and tall grass, sprawling savanna-colored grass, gold and brown. Sometimes the grass rustled, but I couldn't see any "rare Pokemon" from here. Not that I expected to, really. "Rare Pokemon" aren't visible from several feet away, usually.

"How much?" I asked, flicking my eyes towards him.

"Five hundred."

_Not _too_ bad,_ I thought grudgingly. I reached into my bag, found the pocket where I kept my neatly-clipped cash (if there was one thing I respected, it was money) and withdrew the exact amount.

He counted my money and gestured for me to go through.

The Safari Zone had several different levels, pools of water, and tall grass. I knew some of the Pokemon you could apparently capture here – legends of Kangaskahn, Scyther, Tauros, Pinsir and, yes, even Dratini and Dragonair – but I happened to know that I wasn't that lucky.

I sighed. I'd been forced to leave all four of my Pokemon back at the desk, so I was unarmed amidst all of these "rare" Pokemon. Rare, and possibly dangerous. I was fairly certain that if a Scyther got pissed off at me, I was screwed, and if a Rhyhorn or Tauros decided to charge…

My thoughts were startled out of line when the grass rustled before me.

I selected from the bag they've given me: bright yellow Safari Balls in one pocket, smooth, polished stones in another, and some bait I knew would lure the Pokemon closer. I chose a rock and gripped it tightly.

"Niii," came a cry, and a pale bluish-gray shape barreled out of the grass at me. The bleak color of its skin matched the skies, but its eyes burned red and its long forearms wielded vicious claws. Nidorina, I realized, and sighed. _Coulda been an Oddish or an Exeggcute. I guess I should count myself lucky._

I tossed the rock at it, praying it wouldn't run. It bounced off of its skull and landed somewhere in the grass. The Nidorina growled, narrowing her eyes as she came towards me quickly, claws flashing.

_Oh hell._ I picked a yellow Safari Ball and threw it at the charging Nidorina.

The capsule parted, sucked it inside in a burst of white, and held it there.

The Ball shrugged once, but then it stilled, clicking audibly.

I walked over to it timidly, visions of the flailing claws and angry eyes still fresh in my mind. I picked it up, then smiled. "Lyrica," I said, holding the Ball close to my chest. It was a totally unrelated name, and after I thought about it, I realized that it sounded like a prescription drug, but it seemed to fit, with the pulse of "wild life" around me, with the skies gray and the air cool and the memory of a dead Marowak fresh in my head.

Nidorina was a Poison type, but upon evolution it became a Ground type, too. _Leroy, Dusty,_ I thought, my other fist clenching. _This is for you. _I had had bad luck, so far, with Ground types.

Without spending the rest of the time my money had bought, I left the Safari Zone, still clutching Lyrica's Safari Ball.

_Level 33? Almost fits right in. Don't worry, Lyrica, I'll fix you right up…_

* * *

"Dear god, just _stop this_!" The thin man in drifty, loose clothes groaned. He was kneeling over two small, battered birds, both of them breathing raggedly and looking as though they'd gone through the Holocaust. Their enormous gilded birdcage was dropped, forgotten, opened, and a little bent.

I smiled tightly, barely amused. The moonrise was on its way behind the leftover storm clouds, and I was tired of utterly raping all of the trainers around Fuchsia City.

"Just choose your last Pokemon," I said in a tired voice.

The walking stick jerked his head up, another Poke Ball clutched in his head. "Well… you knocked down Clark and Bruce, but let's see if you can hurt… _Fearow_!"

I didn't ask why his Spearow and Pidgey had been named after superheroes, but the bird unfolding its wings before me looked much more ferocious than the average seed-pecker. Its beak was long and jagged, and the look it fixed me with was more than a little disturbing. Fearow was a bird of prey if there ever was one.

"You can still handle this, right, Lyrica?"

"_Niii_," rumbled the beast before me. A denim shade, she no longer matched a monotone sky but instead a building dark tempest, with pale peach decorating her bikini line, large maw and chest. With a build like Nidoking's but more compact, Nidoqueen proved to be far more impressive than her four-legged former forms.

"Okay. I figured. Use Body Slam!"

Lyrica launched her massive weight into the Fearow, who attempted to take flight just as their bodies collided. The shock of the harsh, scale-protected body crashing together jarred the long-beaked bird into paralysis, as well as taking a chunk of its good health.

As she pulled herself up, the Fearow jabbed at her with its gleaming pink beak.

Lyrica narrowed her pale eyes, then reached up and gripped its skinny neck.

I smiled, my mood improved greatly. Even on moderately full HP, Lyrica was a force to be reckoned with. I love a chick who can kick ass, after all.

"Strength."

There was a loud _sqwuak! _as Lyrica pushed her full force into the brittle-boned Flying type.

"All caught up, darling. And I'm loving every second of you."

"_Niiiiq,_" she rumbled, turning to me with a happy smile. Good to see one of my Pokemon had a light spirit.

As I stood there, with the grumbling bird keeper at my feet, I realized that a comfortable bed and a shower and _Green_ were sounding pretty good.

I decided to see if he was still in there and up.

First, I chose the other four Pokemon at my belt, keeping Lyrica the Nidoqueen at my side. She stood patiently, licking a wound on her forearm with a lazy tongue.

Flitz, Xander and Frederick stood before me, all smaller and shorter than the enormous beasts that were Kashen and Lyrica. My Charizard, glowing softly golden in the moonlight that peered from behind broken stormclouds, met Lyrica's eyes fiercely. She returned the gaze, seeming nonchalant as she did.

I wasn't sure what the exchange meant, but it made me smile. Kashen rarely reacted with any sort of special warmth to any of my new team members, as if he expected them all to die on him eventually – a sad truth, and all my fault.

He spread his wings, perhaps attempting to intimidate her, but Lyrica only shook her head gently and laughed, "_Niii._"

Kashen blinked, then turned to me, perplexed. Distastefully, he spat a scrap of fire at the ground, turning his nose up at Lyrica, who seemed forever amused. She threw me a look that seemed to say _Men_, before I laughed and called their attention.

"Okay. I'm going to go sleep in a hotel for once, guys… and I'm going to give you liberty for tonight. I'll call you all back in the morning with the PokeFlute… and you come _running_, or there'll be hell to pay. Got it?"

Kashen growled, spread his wings, and took to the sky, beating at the stormy air dramatically. I arched one eyebrow, realizing that he was showing off… for Lyrica? She stood beside me, gazing up at the soaring Fire type, and seemed mildly entertained, if not impressed.

Xander gazed wistfully up at where Kashen flew, but, knowing his wings couldn't handle such altitudes, decided to settle peacefully on Frederick's jagged head, folding his wings around himself. The three shorter members of my team began to pad away from the city, Flitz rolling lackadaisically beside the stonily-stomping Frederick.

I turned to Lyrica. "You can follow Kashen, or you can go off with Frederick, Flitz and Xander. It's really a matter of how you want to be treated. Trust me, that Charizard is quite a handful."

"_Niii_," she intoned, seeming to say, _I think I can handle it._ With a sly blinking of her bright eyes, she waddled off into the dark, and I watched as the pale, fragile phantom stars were eaten by the city lights, as the moon was cloaked in darkness, and as my heart and head began to argue.

There had once been a time in my life where I'd been too afraid to allow my Pokemon to walk the streets alone, or even to be free from their Poke Balls at night. They'd been young and small, then – not to mention weak. I'd love to see an ambitious Rocket grunt try to lasso Kashen or Lyrica, and get either their faces incinerated or smashed into bits. It'd be equally hilarious to see one leeched, pulverized and electrocuted mercilessly.

No, the worry I felt – for once – was not over my Pokemon.

I looked towards the buildings in Fuchsia that threatened to brush the storming sky, one of them my destination, and I felt a chill – not necessarily an unpleasant one – fall down my spine and brush my back the way a twirling autumn leaf dances upon the wind.

* * *

I hesitated before knocking on the door of room 333.

While I stood in the plush-carpeted hall, fist suspended in the air, the door opened, and there stood Green in a dark t-shirt and boxers, a look of surprise on his face. His hair was damp, making me think he'd just gotten out of the shower.

_Of course you'd think that,_ I thought, and I felt a slow blush climb into my cheeks. And I _never_ blush.

"Leaf," he said, smiling and leaning against the doorframe. "How nice. I didn't expect you to come."

"I didn't, either," I said, feeling a reluctant smile twitch around my lips. "So, can I come in?"

"Sure." Green turned away, strolling into the fairly large hotel room. I found myself staring, wondering how often he'd slept in nice, expensive rooms like this. A nice bathroom with a tub and a shower, two full-sized beds (not that he needed two?), a TV propped up on a dresser with drawers for long-time roomers… this was great!

As I fell on the bed that was nearest the window, I found myself thinking of all the grass and dirt that had been my bed for so many nights during my journey, of all of the Pokemon I'd had sleep near me before my encounter with Team Rocket, of all the mornings I'd woken sore and broken-feeling. Many a nightmare I'd tossed away with only a sheet or a sleeping bag to cover me…

"Something wrong?" Green asked, watching me with a peculiar expression as I absorbed the surroundings of the svelte mahogany hotel room.

"Do you always sleep in hotels?" I asked. I didn't realize how bitter I'd sounded until he chuckled, his reply slow.

"No. I've roughed it a few times, but before gym matches that I think I'll have trouble with, I stay in hotels."

I smirked, rolling onto my back and staring up at the ceiling. He was still watching me, but I could no longer see his face.

"You afford this before _every_ gym match? Insane."My cheeky question made him snort.

"When you win as many battles as _I_ do, then yes," he retorted quickly.

"I've _never_ lost a battle," I flamed hotly, sitting up with a jerk of my upper body. Fixing him squarely with the look I knew many people backed away from, Green stared back. His frosty blue eyes were no match, in the end, for my acidic green stare, and he leaned back and crossed his arms, chuckling.

"Jeez. You've got eyes like Gramps does."

"I do?" I asked quickly, somehow flattered to be compared. When Professor Oak's eyes had burned into me, after I had carelessly thrown a still-burning cigarette onto the dry grass of Route 1, I thought he was condemning me to some kind of nightmarish hell with one look from those dark, blazing flames.

"Oh, yeah. In fact, a lot of the things you do remind me of him. Like…" he paused, sauntered over to where the TV was. He didn't turn it on, only ran an idle hand over the buttons beneath the screen. "…The way you battle."

"You've seen him battle?" I cried, secretly thrilled with the comparison.

"One time only." Vaguely, he seemed to be recalling something. "There was a festival or something, and the champion of our league – he was from Cerulean City, I think – came down to Pallet Town for awhile to see my grandpa. They decided to battle for old times' sake… and would you believe me if I said the champion lost, but my grandpa decided never to tell anyone?" He started to laugh, and I couldn't help but picture it, so I followed his example.

"I can believe it," I giggled. _Giggling? Oh, Leaf, what are you _doing_?_ My mind shrieked as I went on, "What kind of Pokemon did he use?"

Green, still facing away from me, picked up a TV guide and began thumbing through it. "From what I remember, he had a Raticate and a Pidgeot. Such simple Pokemon, but _damn_ were they tough. He's let them all go into the wild, though."

_Raticate?_ I thought of Tobias immediately. "I wonder…" I fumbled, realizing that I should really keep my mouth shut.

Green paused, still facing the wall. "What?"

"I… was just going to say…" I sighed. "I'm sure Professor Oak's Raticate was a lot like Tobias, that's all."

"What was Tobias like?" This time he turned towards me, and there was a faint light shining behind his eyes. Encouraged, eager for any chance to sing my lost Raticate's praises, I gushed.

"He was… well, jeez. He was really _tough_, for a Rattata, when I first caught him. He took everything in stride, and he didn't show me much affection. I thought maybe he hated me at first. For taking away his home, you know? I'm not sure. And when he evolved… he was a true fighter." I turned away, my voice catching on the sorrow I was always tripping over. "He was braver than any legendary, and he… died to help me win Lt. Surge's badge."

Green was silent for a moment.

I turned to see his eyes wet, too – and that light I'd seen in his eyes was the glint of moonlight from the window reflecting on his tears.

I let the quiet pan out, but soon I stated bluntly, "You had a Raticate, too."

"Yeah."

"What was he like?"

He dropped the TV guide.

"It doesn't matter."

"Why not? I just spilled my guts! Now you're going to spill yours!" I jumped up, a sudden pile of hot coals stoked in my stomach. I pushed him in the shoulders, making him face me. "Don't be stubborn, Green. I saw you there, at Pokemon Tower… and I didn't know why you weren't acting like your confident douchebag self until you left. I saw Raticate's tombstone."

He blinked furtively, the tears in his eyes disappearing. I stared. _I thought that was a trick only I knew how to do…_

"Yeah. Well. Some guy in a black get-up killed my Raticate right after I got out of Rock Tunnel. Wrap, poisoned… he didn't stand a chance." He sighed, struggling not to meet my eyes, even though they demandingly sought his line of vision.

Then something clicked.

_Guy in a black get-up…_

"Did they have a red 'R' on their chest?" I asked slowly, my brain tumbling.

"Yeah… that much I remember…" he flicked his powerful ice-blue gaze into me. "I heard some guys in a Celadon Café talking about an organization that's managed to seize a bunch of corporate buildings throughout Kanto… Team Rocket? The 'R'… well, it seemed to make sense."

"It does. As much sense as those evil bitches can make." I shook my head. "Team Rocket… Green, I've been fighting them since I met them in Cerulean City!"

"You have?" He gave me a mystified look, then removed my plying hands on my shoulders.

"Yes! God, Green, I've risked my life _so_ many times to try and stop them…" I stopped, realizing that there was a fiercer look on his face now.

"What?"

"Risked your _life_? Wait, Leaf – are you telling me you honestly have been duking it out with these random criminals? These murderers?"

"Well… yeah."

"_Why_? For God's sake, Leaf, you're going to get yourself killed!"

"…What? Why do _you_ care?" I tried, holding my breath.

He sighed, then dropped his eyes to the floor.

"Because. There's no reason for you to do it," he said evasively.

"Of course there is! If I don't, then they'll do… God knows what!"

"Leaf, that's what _gym leaders_ are for! The fucking _police department_! Hell, we have an elite four that would _love_ to kick some stupid asses! But you? You're just a—"

"Just what the fuck are you trying to say, _Green_?" I bit out, the coals enflamed. "I'm just a _what_?"

He blew air out of his sculpted pink lips, making me see how frustrated he was. Like I cared?

"You're just a kid."

"_I'm_ just a kid? Green, I've been through more than you can _ever_ know. _Ever_."

"I… I know that, Leaf." The fire had gone out of him. I could see and hear that; the stale smoke in the sky was dissipating, too.

"Then what the hell?" An idea occurred to me then. "Why don't you help me? Maybe I can't do it myself, I'm only one small-town girl, but you _and_ me… we're both incredible trainers, Green! We could take them down!"

I expected him – I don't know why – to agree with me, but he looked offended.

"Look, Leaf, I'm not risking my life to defeat these guys. I… promised my grandfather that I'd take the league, spread the Oak name again, make it famous… and I can't do that if me and the team I've worked so hard to raise are dead."

"Coward!" The word flew out of my mouth before I could stop it, but I was seething by this point. "You're too scared to—"

"Leaf, just because you feel like _you_ have to prove yourself by becoming some big hero doesn't mean I do! I had a purpose for becoming a trainer from the start, and I intend to do what I set out to." His tone was steely-cool, and serious as a heart-attack.

I backed away from him, no longer seeing him but instead a hellish stain of red – the color that had dominated my life, red anger, red blood.

"Fine," I spit out. "I don't need you anyway. And I don't have to prove _anything_ to _anyone _– least of all you, Green Oak!"

In my fury, I stomped out of his hotel room, slamming the door behind me.

I heard the sound of Green locking the door behind me, but it only drove me faster outside, chased by the fear that his accusations were all the truth, and I had been blind to my own insanity all along.

Blind, and dragging my Pokemon into a fight that'd end in either my heroism or death.

* * *

The sun was coming up. I could, through my dreamlike haze, see a disc of gold sitting at the horizon, the gray dawn incinerating before my hazy vision.

I turned over, my back stiff from slumbering in the route outside of Fuchsia once again. As I turned my attention to the shadow standing over me, I noticed clawed orange feet and a thick, winding tail that ended in a flickering flame.

Kashen stared down at me, looking somewhat annoyed that I was sleeping outside when I said I'd be in a hotel room. Or so I'm assuming, since his long, thin arms were crossed.

"…_growr._" He grunted, looking down at me with glinting blue eyes that only served to remind me of Green. Which only served to remind me of the awful fight we'd had in his hotel room, leading to me snoozing outside, as I'd been doing since I'd started my journey.

"Kashen… hi?"

I glanced up, shielding the young sunlight with a half-cocked hand on my forehead. Xander lighted on Kashen's shoulder, gazing down at me with some confusion, his tongue lolling ridiculously, like always.

Frederick stared beside Kashen, Flitz at his side, grinning maniacally. Lyrica trailed behind, and when she arrived she stood a little apart from the group, still an outcast despite my level-grinding and self-proclaimed affection for her.

"…Guys. Look, I really did go to that room, but… let's just say things didn't turn out the way they should have." I sat up, rubbing my aching back with an absent clawed hand. "Look. I've been thinking… maybe we shouldn't be chasing Team Rocket like this."

They all looked shocked – except Lyrica, who only cocked her head in puzzlement. Xander dropped to the ground, spreading his wings and glaring at me with his beady eyes.

"Xander, I know, they killed Tradden, but—"

"_Rooowr,_" Kashen snarled, stomping one enormous foot. It send a cloud of dust flying, and some Spearow and Pidgeotto took the sky in shock after he did so.

"Okay, fine," I said, closing my eyes. "How about _I _fight Team Rocket… alone."

"Grav!" Frederick burst out, pounding two of his fists together. "Graveler grav!"

"I… I can't keep risking _your_ lives like this. The gym battles are enough, but every trainer must do that to reach the top. This…" I met all of their eyes in turn. "This is _my_ battle."

The wind tangled my hair around my lightly sun-burned face. My Pokemon team was silent, but finally, my dear Flitz rolled forward until he was sitting squarely in my lap. He looked up at me with some determination and proclaimed, "Electrode!"

I sat back, guessing at what that meant: _It's mine, too._

At that, with heavy, ground-stomping steps, the mountainous Pokemon named Frederick joined me, sitting on my left. He put a tough hand on my shoulder – a hand that could pulverize the blades instantly – and stroked it lightly with an uncanny gentle affection.

"Grav." _And mine._

Xander, where he had stood before me, softened his beady glare, tucking his tongue back into the cavernous confines of his fanged mouth. "Gol, golbat!" He flew upwards, landing on my opposite shoulder. The comforting weight of him made me smile, tears softly welling in my eyes.

_Yes, I am too… for Tradden._

Xander had seen many losses, but Tradden had been the first.

Kashen growled, shaking his head. "_Gruwrrrowr._" He gave me a look that clearly and definitely told me how stupid I was for looking so expectantly his way.

_Of course I am. You had to ask?_

Only Lyrica remained. She watched the others' show of devotion uncertainly, and then she glanced at Kashen, who slowly came around to where I sat, Pokemon at my side and on my lap. He stood behind me, staring challengingly at the Nidoqueen, who looked hesitant.

"You don't have too, Lyrica," I said softly. "God knows I've lost enough Pokemon for you to be reluctant."

But Lyrica smiled, her eyes bright.

"_Niii,_" she said gaily.

The tears spilled.

"Green be damned, you guys… we're fighting. To the end…"

Their presence gave me such strength – strength that I didn't know was inside, that I didn't know I could possibly have.

"Thank you."

* * *

**Current Team:**

Charizard: "Kashen" - Male, Level 37

Golbat: "Xander" - Male, Level 37

Electrode: "Flitz" - Level 37

Graveler: "Frederick" - Male, Level 37

Nidoqueen: "Lyrica" - Female, Level 37


	24. My Superhuman Might

**Locke and Key:** _A Nuzlocke Story_

* * *

"If I go crazy, then will you still call me Superman?  
If I'm alive and well, will you be there holding my hand?  
I'll keep you by my side with my superhuman might.  
Kryptonite."

-3 Doors Down, "Kryptonite"; _The Better Life._

* * *

It was raining outside the gym. I could hear it barely pattering the sidewalk, lightly tapping on the roof, and if I looked behind me, I could see the sheet of water pouring from the overhang above the doors.

Unbeknownst to me, I'd be soaking wet by the time I fought Koga.

"Poison types – this will be a breeze," I said to myself, feeling a bubble of confidence being blown up steadily inside. I held one Safari Ball in my hand, clutching it tightly as I approached the first gym trainer.

The man was dressed like a retarded clown, but I didn't make any comments. I wasn't here for one of those Pokemon fashion shows that they do in Hoenn and Sinnoh – I was here for good old-fashioned Pokemon battling. Or, in my terms, ass-kicking.

"Choose your first Pokemon," he said, a sly look on his face.

I grinned. having

"Go, Lyrica!"

The Safari Ball split; my Nidoqueen appeared, glowering at the funny-looking trainer before her. Nidoqueen, with its tough, venomous hide, was impervious to any poison statuses this gym could inflict, as well as having moderately high defense to block any physical attacks they would sling.

_Thank god for Lyrica…_ I watched as the harlequin-looking dude smiled slyly.

"Go, Hypno!"

"What?" I cried immediately. The Poke Ball released a long-legged, vulpine creature with a ruff of fur about its neck and creepy, blank eyes. It had yellow fur and a pendulum in one hand that hypnotically rocked back and forth. Lyrica pointedly kept her eyes away from it, as well as his expressionless eyes.

"Hyyyypnooooo," it drawled, trying to get Lyrica to look at it.

"What the fuck is this? Hypno's a Psychic Pokemon!"

"Yeah, and?" The gym trainer shrugged.

"This is a Poison gym."

"Appears so."

Ughh. Whatever.

"Fine… Lyrica, return!" I wasn't risking her life. Dusty's death was too soon. I glanced down at my belt, finally deciding on a Poke Ball that was dull from lack of polish, but not too chipped.

"Go, Xander! Use Bite!"

The Golbat flew for Hypno's face, mouth gaping and teeth exposed and glinting faintly with Dark type energy. It hooked into its fox-featured face, causing it to stumble backwards and emit a creepy-as-hell shriek that pierced the air.

The other gym trainers looked up from where they stood, looking perplexed.

The Hypno threw Xander off of its face, tossing him into the air. Xander flapped his wings, remaining airborne and fixing his opponent with a rapt stare.

"Hypno, Psywave!"

A massive spiral of shimmering air swirled around Hypno's face. He ticked his pendulum, which sent the wave flying into Xander, shocking him with the energy.

"_Goolbat!_"

"_No_!" Fear spiked through me as Xander fell onto the ground, wings trembling spasmodically.

_Xander… one of the only ones left… please don't tell me… not you too…_

"Bat… gol…" he struggled to raise his head up wearily, fixing me with his eyes. I was reassured: there was fire in them yet. _Like Tobias, you won't go down without a fight, eh?_ Smiling, I reached into my bag, withdrawing a Hyper Potion. I knelt to where he sat on the ground, wings draped around him like a purple curtain.

"Here, Xander. This'll fix you up," I said, spritzing him lightly with the Potion. He came to life before my jaded, fearful eyes, rising to the air again. The look in his small eyes was grateful.

"Finish this fucker off. Bite," I commanded sharply. Xander dove this time, aiming for Hypno's arm. The Dark power flowed into the Psychic type's veins. In pain, Hypno dropped his pendulum, then fell to his knees, his fist remaining unclenched and stiff.

The harlequin-dressed guy scowled, then returned his Hypno.

I sighed, drawing Xander into my arms tightly. He didn't struggle, only looked surprised.

"Be careful out there, okay?" I murmured. "You can use Bite, which is my only strength against Psychic types, but I know your Poison typing makes you weak. Lyrica's immune to poison statuses, so you and her will be my main fighters here. Can you?"

"Gol, golbat!" He shrieked, his face showing a kind of idolatry. I was flattered. _Trainers mean a lot to their Pokemon… and I've had Xander since he was only a level 7 Zubat… time flies, man…_

"Good. Now let's get to the Pokemon Center and try again," I said, turning to the door.

Fuck.

It was pouring rain still.

* * *

My clothes were a soaked second skin by the time I got to Koga. He was standing behind the invisible walls I'd run into a few times, put there by the ninjas that had once had a coven (or whatever you call them) in Fuchsia City back in the feudal era. They'd gotten poisons from the gardens of Celadon, then utilized them, training some of the more skilled ninjas into expert assassins, a contradiction to the noble samurai of our sister state, Johto.

The poisonous assassins had descended into the Fuchsia City gym leader, Koga. He'd sometimes spotlighted as a member of the Elite Four, leaving his gym under the care of his niece, Janine, who was an equally resilient trainer.

I preferred Koga, though.

His eyes were sharp, his face like a hawk's. The Poke Balls at his belt were drawn with a swift, almost invisibly quick precision – the deadliest weapons he had to offer my unwitting throat.

When I finally approached him, weary but fully healed from another trip in the storm, Koga folded his arms across his chest, face stony.

"Welcome, challenger. I see you've come to challenge Fuchsia's one and only gym. Where are you from?" His voice was quick, too, and sharp, the consonants precise. I felt like shuriken were flying past my flesh and barely nicking it every time he spoke.

"I am Leaf Brannigan from Pallet Town," I said, holding his dark gaze.

"Pallet Town. A coincidence? I think not; you must know the young man who came in earlier today."

"Yes." I didn't feel the need to discuss it any further. Green was no longer in my mind; not that I'd admit, anyway. "Surely you've heard of me?"

"I have. You've been defeating the gym leaders left and right so far. Brock and Misty respect you; Lt. Surge enjoyed your battle, but disliked you. Erika praises you not only for being a good trainer, but for helping her rid her town of criminals." He paused. "I must tell you, I am not like the others. I will not hold back, and I do not give undeserved praise."

"Fine." I drew Xander's Poke Ball. "Are you ready?"

"You're aware of the League rules?"

"Yes."

"Okay then. Let the battle commence. Choose your first Pokemon, challenger!"

I threw Xander's Ball. He flew into the air, beating his wings furiously.

Koga drew his first Poke Ball, then threw it at the floor. Emerging was a Koffing, which I'd seen many times, a derpy face and a craggy, purple body, filled with poisonous craters.

_Oh no… Self-Destruct… _Memories of Dusty, blown away by Weezing's suicidal explosion, sent shivers down my spine.

Frantically, I withdrew Xander, knowing he was puzzled but not caring at the moment.

"Go, Frederick!"

A Rock type could sustain the blow much easier, I knew. He seemed to realize his purpose, for he braced himself.

Koffing _did_ use Self-Destruct, and the explosion barely fazed Frederick's tough Rock type exterior. He glanced back at me, a smile reassuring me that nothing so trivial as a high-powered, suicidal Normal type move could do him in.

_Thanks_, I mouthed to him. He looked very pleased with my praise, and braced himself for Koga's next Pokemon.

Narrowing his eyes, Koga withdrew his shattered Koffing and released an enormous, oozing Pokemon, a wide black chasm of a mouth yawning open, two shimmering black eyes glaring at me from a mud-like face. Muk, the evolved form of the disgusting Grimer, was one of Koga's most fearsome Pokemon.

But… Frederick could handle that.

"Frederick, Magnitude!" I called, and he drew one craggy fist into the air and pounded it into the floor of the gym. It rippled weakly, despite the force of his blow, and traveled over to Muk's oozing liquid body with a power of 5.

_Fuck_.

"Muk," Koga's clipped tones shot, "Minimize."

Before my eyes, its hideous body began to mutate… and shrink, its 'flesh' dancing like striped purple fire before my eyes. It was, indeed, smaller than before.

I narrowed my eyes.

"Frederick, Rock Slide!"

The Graveler heaved heavy stones at the pile of sludge, but in its minimized state, it managed to evade all of the recklessly thrown rocks.

Koga smiled, pleased with his deception.

"Muk, Toxic!"

_Toxic… shit!_

Toxic inflicted no ordinary poison. The intense toxins gradually sapped more of a Pokemon's health as the battle went on, until it was leeching nearly half. It was a deadly killer… one that those Fuchsia ninjas had perfected long before Koga's time.

"Frederick, no! Dodge it!"

Panicked, Frederick curled into the heavy ball that his species could form themselves into, but it was too late; he was drenched in black ooze before he could escape.

_Shit._

I had no choice. I'd have to recall him.

"Frederick, return!" I called, knowing he was safe as long as he was in his Ball.

I glanced at my other choices, then chose the Safari Ball clipped to my belt.

"Lyrica, go!"

Taking the place of my Graveler was Nidoqueen – immune to any Toxic attacks Muk could throw at her. Koga's brow creased, but other than that, he appeared composed.

"Use Body Slam, Lyrica!"

Heaving her great weight at the Muk, Lyrica managed to hit its minimized body. It's eyes bulged out of its head as it was flattened out of shape, briefly, by her stunning blow.

Muk had fainted.

Koga closed his eyes briefly, then opened them wide once more.

"Go, Venomoth!"

The ball split. In a flash of white, a large pastel purple moth appeared. A venomous version of a fluttering insect, like Butterfree, Venomoth evolved from the smaller Venonats.

I withdrew Lyrica. "Go, Xander!"

An aerial battle – something I could appreciate.

Xander glared at Venomoth above a gaping, fanged mouth; he rushed forward at my command, his wings sharply cutting at it with Aerial Ace.

Koga called, "Venomoth, Psybeam!"

…_What? How did I not see that coming?_

I bit my lower lip in fear, unable to cry out, as a glowing shot of energy was sprayed into Xander's face.

He was fazed, I could tell, for as he was hit with the colorful spray, he dipped towards the ground, almost crashing. I tasted blood from biting through my lip, and wondered briefly if I'd have to bury my fourth-caught Pokemon in a long legacy after the battle.

But he was alive. His wings caught the air again and pulled his slight body upwards, and that's what I needed to finish the poisonous bug off.

"Aerial Ace!"

The swift Flying-type move sent Venomoth sprawling, cut and tired and on the gym's shining floor.

Koga recalled it, looking highly annoyed.

"Weezing, finish this!"

The mutated, three-headed ball of gas that was Koffing's evolution glared at Xander.

_Self-Destruct,_ I told myself, and my hand strayed to Frederick's Ball before I remembered that I had left him intoxicated inside.

I'd forgotten to heal him… and I could be paying a price.

As if sensing my indecision, Koga allowed a slight smile to break the mold of his sharply creased face.

"Challenger, fear not. I would lose, according to the League rules, if I were to use Self-Destruct with my only remaining Pokemon. I am not bloodthirsty enough to kill one of your Pokemon without a cause."

The ice left my bones. I lifted my gaze to Koga's, and I smiled gratefully, though the only words I spoke were, "Xander, return!"

In his place, I sent out Lyrica, immune to poison but also powerful enough to destroy Weezing quickly, whereas Xander would have taken much longer.

Weezing endured several of Lyrica's Body Slams, but eventually he collapsed under her final heavy side swipes. It collapsed, withered from the repeated slamming.

"Hah! The Soulbadge! Great job, guys!" I cried, clapping my hands together in glee.

"_Nalll_," Lyrica cried beside me, an overjoyed expression on her bright face.

Koga recalled his beaten Weezing, his eyes closed but his mouth curled into a small, amused smile.

He approached me, handing me the case that contained my prizes – a TM holding Toxic and my fifth gym badge.

"I suppose you will continue to fight Team Rocket."

I rose my gaze sharply. "Yes. I will. Why?"

"Don't let them bring you down. If you lose all of your Pokemon to their criminal ways, you won't be able to continue your League challenge… and that would be a shame." His creased face seemed to soften. "There have been few trainers of your caliber in my time as gym leader… and I'd hate to lose to someone who only goes on to lose themselves."

I felt myself smile.

"I'm not planning on losing to anybody. After all, I haven't so far."

I left the gym. Outside, the sun had broken through the clouds weakly, and cool droplets still gathered in small, litter-filled bodies on the street. A few drops dripped onto my nose from the marquis above the gym as I strained my neck into the sky.

"_Nal, nii?_" Lyrica stood behind me, trying to see what I was looking at.

I tore my eyes away, immediately ashamed.

"Nothing. Let's go to the Pokemon Center before Frederick passes out in there."

Lyrica's eyes narrowed – much in Kashen's inquisitive manner, in which he could see right through me, a Charizard though he was – but she followed me away from the gym.

When I was sure no one was looking, I looked back at the hotel.

_Green already beat Koga. He's surely gone now,_ I thought, sighing inside without knowing why. _I'll be going to the Seafoam Islands, and he'll probably be in Saffron… we may not meet again until the Elite Four… and if I fail in Silph Co., maybe not at all._

A terrifying thought… but for what reasons?

* * *

"How the _fuck_ is this supposed to work?" I cried in frustration, peering into the depths of the water. A Krabby I'd caught with my Good Rod some time ago bobbed just above the surface, looking up at me with some trepidation in its pale eyes.

"_Ko-key-ko-key_," it said in a gurgling voice.

"Don't worry. I don't think I'm going to get on your back." I glanced around me, then sighed, resigned. "Vexor, just swim as fast as you can. I'll be holding onto your pincer."

Vexor looked unsure, but after I waded into the water near Fuchsia, I gripped one of his pincers, feeling half-wet and half-dry.

I _detested_ the feeling, plus I could feel mud squishing between my toes (I'd taken off my shoes and my socks, thanks) and the coolness of the air caused goosebumps to prickle my arms and shoulders.

"Okay, Vexor," I muttered distastefully, "Let's get this over with."

The gray skies and the swirling sea made me feel like some third-rate sailor, clutching a small, struggling Krabby and blinking against the sting of the salt water in my eyes. There were trainers in the ocean, I was loathe to discover, and as soon as they spotted the uncomfortable, bitching girl and her frantic Krabby, they rushed over to fight me.

One girl, looking great and slim in a purple bikini, paddled over to us as quickly as my Pokemon swam. She held a Poke Ball in one hand.

"Hey, let's battle!" She cried.

I blinked.

"Battle? Out here? How?"

She laughed at my ignorance. "Never had a sea battle, eh? See those rocks over there?" She pointed to the stones that protruded from the water, blocking off many routes that were specifically for cargo ships. I'd noticed them, but I hadn't realized that those stones were for battling.

Now that she mentioned it, the tops were smooth and flat, the surfaces textured and rough so a Pokemon wouldn't slip.

But… "What if they fall into the water?"

The girl shrugged. "I guess they either have to get back up, or they get attacked by whatever lurks in the sea."

Thoughts of any of my Pokemon at the mercy of the sea – Frederick falling into the water with a heavy thud, Kashen stricken by a powerful attack, clipping his wings and sending him plunging, Lyrica being knocked into the water with a strong attack – gave me a harsh shudder.

There were only two Pokemon I'd be using out here, it looked like.

The swimmer tossed her Poke Ball onto the rocks, releasing a Staryu.

"Flitz, go!"

The Great Ball released Flitz, who spun uncertainly on the stones, giving the currents eddying around him an uneasy look.

"It's okay, buddy," I called from my place in the sea, clutching Vexor worriedly. "Just be careful not to fall in!"

He turned his eyes to me. "Trode," he muttered.

"Staryu, Swift!" The other girl cried.

Staryu made a creepy _"hyuh"_ sound, then spun rapidly in the air, shooting bright star-shaped rays from the red gem in its center. The unavoidable asterisks struck Flitz weakly, though he rolled backwards, his round, limbless body offering no traction to the smooth plateau.

"Careful, buddy," I called sharply. "Use Shock Wave!"

Another unavoidable attack shot from him as he concentrated – a quick bolt of electricity pounded Staryu, causing it to drop into the sea on impact.

I glanced at the girl, but she wasn't worried. Staryu burst back into the air, rotating quickly. It landed on a stone in front of Flitz, injured but not mortally yet.

"Staryu, Water Pulse!"

Flitz speedily rolled over to the side, then gave a determined look.

"Thunder!"

A move I'd taught with a TM, Thunder shot a disc of electricity into the air and then brought it down heavily on the opponent. Staryu was stricken heavily, then gave a final _"hyeh"_ before collapsing.

Flitz looked pleased, and, before anything unexpectedly awful could happen, I recalled him to his Great Ball, glad for the experience.

I'd have many more aquatic battles on my way to Seafoam Island, but I was ready.

* * *

I passed Cinnabar Island, heading straight for the deep, cold chambers I knew to be the Seafoam Islands. Inside were Water types, Ice types, and the legendary Pokemon Articuno.

I'd be there for Articuno, and also for the sixth Pokemon on my team.

As soon as Vexor's legs touched the shore, I pulled out my Poke Ball, recalling him. "Good job. I won't need you, hopefully, after this." I glanced into the dark shadows of the ice caverns, then entered, inhaling the concentrated scent of salt that hit me immediately.

There were rapids pooling around the platforms of stone inside, and stalactites and stalagmites punctuated the floor and ceiling. Boulders were abundant, but I had Lyrica for that.

"Urf urf," came a hoarse, deep-throated cry from behind me.

I turned, seeing a white horn poking through the surface of the swirling cold water.

I grinned.

"Go, Lyrica! Toxic!"

Upon release, my Nidoqueen hurled sludge at the dark spot under the water.

It scored a hit; the Pokemon leapt into the air, its sleek white tail sending droplets our way as it did so. The poisoned Water-type landed upon the stone we stood on, glaring. It was a white, sleek-furred mammal with only flippers and a dual-flippered tail, its horn, adorable, glistening brown eyes, and the chubby, puppy-like mouth to identify it.

I knew what it was: I'd always loved them, as far as detested Water Pokemon went. It was a Seel, which evolved into the powerful Ice type Dewgong.

I grinned

"Poisoned and weakened, you aren't going anywhere. Lyrica, Strength!"

The Seel, angered, lowered its head and launched itself with Headbutt. Lyrica grabbed it in the air, watched it flip around, and then smashed it into the ground.

"_URF!_" It cried, then went limp. It wasn't dead or fainted; its dull eyes showed me that the worsening poison was preventing it from fighting further.

I threw an Ultra Ball, waited for it to click, and smiled when it did.

"CeeCee. I'm going to heal you all up, little guy," I murmured, reaching into my bag for an Antidote.

Then I realized: for the first time since I'd started my journey, I had a full six Pokemon team. Kashen, Xander, Flitz, Frederick, Lyrica, and now, CeeCee.

_And I vow to keep it this way._

* * *

**Current Team:**

Charizard: "Kashen" – Male, Level 39

Golbat: "Xander" – Male, Level 38

Electrode: "Flitz" – Level 39

Graveler: "Frederick" – Level 37

Nidoqueen: "Lyrica" – Female, Level 38

Seel: "CeeCee" – Male, Level 32


	25. Have I Run Too Far?

**Locke and Key: **_A Nuzlocke Story_

Thank you all for the reviews! This chapter may seem like a filler, but it _does_ have its purpose.

* * *

Am I wrong?  
Have I run too far to get home, yeah?  
Have I gone and left you here alone?  
If I would, could you?

-Alice in Chains, "Would?"; _Dirt_.

* * *

_Here… invasion?_

The darkness was stirring. Light was still as far away as ever, as far away as liberty was, but there was a presence near.

_Again. Humans again. I will not be driven from my nest again._

It spread its wings, sapphire feathers rustling stiffly, crusted with frost. It unwound its long, silken tail, and arched its neck. The dark beak parted, although it was sealed with the cold and with silence.

_I will not tolerate this again. I am Articuno, legendary bird of ice… and humans shall fear my wrath once more._

* * *

"Ugh! I swear, I've just walked in three fucking circles within fifteen minutes!" I stormed, stomping my foot. The ground was slick, but I managed to keep my balance.

CeeCee looked up at me, seemingly smiling. Then again, fucking Seel always look like that, so what do I know?

"Urff, urff," he giggled. I flicked him a scathing glance, when an idea bubbled in my brain.

"You know your way around here, don't you? You know how to get to Articuno." It wasn't a question. He had to know. CeeCee had been one of the many Seel born and raised inside the Seafoam caves.

He nodded once.

"Where do we have to go?"

He seemed to ponder my words. Then, he clapped his fins together and leapt into the water – the freezing torrents that no humans could survive in.

"Wait! CeeCee, I can't—"

I rushed to the edge of the stone platform, clutching the salt-crusted brink. He was lost in the swirling depths.

I leaned back on my haunches, frustrated. How dare the little fluffball leave me like that! I was about to get up and look for him myself, when I heard him cry out, "_Urf!"_

I looked to the mouth of the cave. He was floating cheerfully in the weak light that shimmered on the water.

I sighed.

"So we have to leave the cave. Okay."

* * *

Surfing on CeeCee was not _quite_ as awkward as surfing on Vexor the Krabby. I could cling to him, almost on his back, and stay _mostly_ dry. Salt water didn't sneak into my mouth, crawl up my sore nose, or slap my eyes with stinging bitterness. And CeeCee's fur was sleek, streamlining him for swifter swimming.

We smoothly sailed around the first island, finding the second cave. Apparently, sailing from Cinnabar would lead you to the first, small, enclosed cave; surfing from a different spot in Fuchsia would lead you to a second, bigger but more hidden cave.

I unloaded CeeCee, raising myself onto the shore of the cave.

"Well, are you ready, buddy?"

"Urff," he agreed, seemingly cheerful, even now.

I could feel excitement crawl up from my ankles and settle in my belly. After all, the legendary ice bird Articuno lurked inside of here… and a battle was _definitely_ called for.

I had advantages – Kashen, Frederick, Flitz – and I had Pokemon I would never use against it – Lyrica, CeeCee, and Xander – but then, I reassured myself that it wouldn't be necessary. Articuno was powerful, but I was well-armed.

An aggressive attack stopped us from traveling much further. A daring, fat pink Slowbro leapt at us, his massive green-shelled tail lagging behind him.

I winked at CeeCee. "Headbutt. Go on!"

He clapped his fins together happily, then launched himself straight into the Slowbro's big belly, his horn piercing his abdomen. The Slowbro cried out and unleashed some sort of randomly bursting psychic attack.

CeeCee tore through it. His hide was thick and tough, and his special defense was neutral.

"Headbutt again!"

Slowbro stumbled backwards into the twisting water, then floated there limply.

"Haha. Good job." I patted my little Seel on his head, shy of his horn.

"Urff!" With that, he began to glow – which I almost didn't identify at first, because of his pale fur's already bright sheen. But, surely, he was _evolving_.

I frisked him quickly with my Pokedex – level 34. I'd forgotten that Seel evolved so soon after capture.

Spinning before me was a Dewgong, which was far more graceful-looking than Seel. His tongue-and-cheek smile was gone, replaced with a small smirk, complete with little pointed teeth in each corner. His eyes were liquid black, his dual-finned tail becoming a mermaid's long appendage.

And, yes – he was big enough to Surf on! The right way!

"Dew, gong gong gong," he said spiritedly.

* * *

As CeeCee and I stumbled farther away from the mouth of the second cave, the light diminished almost completely. Soon enough, I was holding my body tightly against the wall of the cave as I could, finding the scrape of salt-crusted stone against my hands and knees a sort of comfort. In the opaque darkness, I could hear only the rushing torrents, the murmurings of the wild Pokemon deep inside the cave's bowels, and my slight breathing.

Every once in a while, CeeCee would slap at my bare legs with his sleek tail, if only to reassure me that he was still there. He traveled in front of me, as he was a strong swimmer and could survive if he dropped into the rapids below. Also, if _I_ was attacked by a wild Ice or Water Pokemon, there could be a problem. I was fairly confident that he could handle it.

And, as we walked further and further from our only source of light, I began to feel incredibly stupid. This cave – cold, dark, silent, with a mythological Pokemon rumored to be sealed within its depths – was not exactly the best excavation site. I had come here on a whim, hoping to find a legendary bird – but even if I did find it, could I fight it in the dark?

_What if it's not even in here?_

The thought had crossed my mind before. My sources weren't too reliable… oh, why hadn't I checked with Oak…?

I'd jumped the gun.

_Again_.

Just as this brushed my brain, CeeCee let out a sharp, alarmed bark in front of me. My hands smacked into a wall that was less than three inches from my face.

Nervous, I said soothingly to CeeCee, "It's okay. We probably just forgot to turn here." I felt along the deeply inscribed cave walls with my blind hands, feeling a narrow, tight space surrounded by three walls.

_Fuck. Dead end!_

Rage sparked through me, irrational at best, but it was a heat so fierce and sudden that it caused me to jerk and fling my fists against the wall before me. I pounded it harshly, letting out a long howl that tore into the silence like scissors through velvet.

"Goddamnit!"

The curse echoed loosely throughout the cave after a few seconds. I paused, feeling twice as stupid for screaming so loudly.

Really, what did that solve?

"Gong?" CeeCee whimpered near my feet. I felt him nudge my ankles softly, seemingly to question if I was okay.

I took a shaky breath.

"Sorry, little guy. I, uh, lost my temper. I guess we'll just have to turn—"

A noise in the darkness, almost unidentifiable at first, came to reach us, echoing placidly.

My anger dissipated. There was something else in here—and it was perhaps more than another wild Seel or Psyduck.

I waited, CeeCee tense and quiet near my feet, as the shadows moved again. The air was… was it chilling? Getting colder? I exhaled softly, noting that I could actually see the white plumes smoking in the air.

It _was_ getting colder… and I had a sneaking suspicion that I'd found what I'd been looking for.

"CeeCee… return!" I whispered, fumbling for the only empty Ball at my belt. I pointed the laser in his general direction, and it returned him, leaving me eerily alone in this frozen, silent darkness.

Still feeling the walls, I took a step forward, trying to be as quiet as possible. As I slinked along, my breath's pale intensity strengthened. There was little to be seen by my adjusted but weak human eyes but gray and black, stone and silver water.

But Articuno was here.

I had come seeking it, but it had, no doubt, found me first.

Would there be hell to pay?

I paused, the hair on the back of my neck bristling like an angry Pokemon's furry hackles.

"Arrrrc," came a shrill, piercing coo – a mockery of a baby bird's flimsy cries, a shriek like a winter wind through frozen pine. I stopped, frozen by fear and fascination.

It was behind me, in that narrow space I'd just left – but how?

Accustomed to the silence and shadows of Seafoam's many caverns, Articuno had been the hunter all along – and I the prey, the helpless quarry in the talons of a mighty raptor.

"So… you found me," I heard myself say, a harsh affront to the quiet. "Now what?"

"_Arrrac!"_

The shriek whistled, another powerful blast of cold storm, and I whirled, wielding a Great Ball with affinity.

"Flitz! Thunder Wave!"

The silence was shattered like fragile glass met with a slamming force.

In a burst of light that shredded the shadows, Flitz emerged, his spherical form cloaked in gray as the light from his Ball faded. He charged yellow upon release, then shot a small, weak spark into the darkness before us.

Impact. The shadows lit up, writhing with electricity. Articuno spread its cold wings, sending a gale into us with some force, and then shot a beam of ice our way, shimmering lightly. Flitz was hit, and I could feel his body roll into my ankles.

"Are you okay?" I murmured to him, knowing Articuno was a great deal higher leveled then my Pokemon were.

"Electrode," he said, somewhat falteringly. I decided to take no chances, and withdrew him.

I chose a trusted Poke Ball next. "Kashen!"

The darkness cleared away briefly once more, Kashen emerged, throwing his head and roaring into the black void before him. He seemed confused.

"Articuno, the legendary ice bird, is here. A much stronger opponent than what we're used to," I murmured. It can fly, too, but Flitz paralyzed it, so we have an advantage now. Maybe we're even faster than it."

Kashen spat an ember into the darkness, near Articuno's clawed black feet. It sizzled there, and in its light, I could see a violent glint shrouded in the bird's predatory black eyes.

It flared its wings again, and without warning, it rushed us. I let out a shriek and dove for Kashen, who spread his wings quickly to protect us, but Articuno flew straight past us. It headed for the light outside, gold Thunder Wave still sparking in its feathers, and shot upwards, into the night sky.

"It's… flying away from us?" I murmured, shaken still. "Let's chase it – it can't get away from us that easily!"

Kashen lowered his head, and I flung myself onto his warm orange shoulders, holding on tightly as his wings braced themselves. He got a running start, then let the air hold us. Flapping mightily, he spurned us upwards, flinging us into the black, starry sky.

Indeed, flying before the moon, Articuno was not running from us. It was preparing to defend its territory – to drive the invading trainer and her Pokemon away, or even to our deaths! I clung to the dragon beneath me, feeling my heartbeat faster.

An aerial battle was something I never thought I'd experience, and the way the moon's silver glow rested on Articuno's frosty blue feathers reminded me of starlight on a shaded lake. Beauty was all around me, the black sky, the cold stars, the rushing dark ocean water beneath us – and I was drunk on all of it, including the thrill of being in the middle of a legendary Pokemon battle.

Kashen impatiently thrashed at the air, waiting for me to issue a command. I caught a hold of myself, managing, "Flamethrower, Kashen!"

He shot forward and up, up into the rounded moon, and from his jaws spewed a beam of hot fire. Articuno rushed us, catching the fire in its glorious feathers, and slammed its wings into Kashen's side, ignoring the burn of his attack.

On impact, Articuno's wings hardened like thick ice, and we spun downwards until Kashen gained control again. Breathlessly, I exhaled, "Again! Flamethrower again!"

Another powerful stream of flames caught the air, and Articuno was hit—another powerful strike. It faltered in the air, piercing the midnight with an agonized shriek of pain: _"Arrrrrcc!"_

To me, it seemed as though there was something else in its cry besides physical pain—disappointment? Failure?

I hesitated, watching it barely catch itself before skimming the ocean's surface, flying with a slight limp in one scorched wing. The feathers had a wet, glistening look to them—blood and melted ice.

It watched us wearily as we stayed stagnant in the air, Kashen waiting, growing edgy again beneath me.

But something washed over me: pity. What was it the travelers had told me in the watch tower? _"__Many have captured it, but it always manages to escape and find its way back home." _In other words, this was its place of rest, its place of solitude and peace. A kingdom? Perhaps not. A home? Yes.

Another human had invaded its home, to either drive it away or capture it.

I wasn't another human.

"Kashen, enough. Let's get out of here." I pulled gently at his neck, preparing to call him back. It was senseless. I didn't like shedding innocent blood anymore than I liked shedding deserving blood, and I was done here.

I'd gotten what I came for.

Kashen growled low below me. His throat rumbled like a tiger's purr, but I knew he wasn't expressing delight.

"I'm sorry. I know you wanted to fight, but I can't—"

_Wham!_

Driving upwards, Articuno had hit Kashen in the stomach, its wings flared out around its slender sapphire thorax, sending me straight into the air from the force.

Without the stability of warmth and wings and fire under me, I had nothing to hold onto but the stars, and they wouldn't let me grab them. Falling is never fun, and I've always known that, but I couldn't do anything but scream silently, hearing my anguish and terror in my head, and wait to hit the water or the stones or the fire of Hell and death.

The ocean wasn't warm anymore; those summer days had slowly withered into age, slowly grown brittle and colder. The ocean was tainted by autumn now, and the cold surge of water around my back, chest, legs, face, hair, alarmed me but didn't faze me beyond that. I closed my eyes to protect them against the sting of salt, and prayed that no angry seawater Pokemon would attack a vulnerable girl lying in their ocean.

I wasn't there long, slowly bobbing towards the surface. Long arms, hooked with claws that nicked my wet flesh and let my blood drool into the water that was pale with moonlight, pulled me into the cold air, making me gasp at the shock of freezing air and freezing water combining.

Kashen hugged me close to his broad chest and stomach, clutching me tightly as his wings struggled to pull himself away from the water. I couldn't think too well, still stunned from the fear of falling from my Charizard and being thrown recklessly into the water, but when I glanced down again, I could see pools of scarlet bubbling around a macabre massacre.

The wings were torn, ribbons of beauty shredded from their silk; the feathers no longer tinkled with freedom and wind and frost. The ice had melted, the blood had been spilled, the bones exposed beneath the beauty. Vengeance ruled a strong fist in the natural world, more than I realized.

I had killed Articuno after all. Still somewhat delirious, I was unaware of the tears on my cheeks and the sobs hitching in my throat.

* * *

I woke up to the strength of the sun on my face, to sand and grit on my skin. I drowsily pulled my eyes open, feeling stiff and sore, and I gradually became aware that I had not fallen asleep alone. Beside me, the warmth of a Fire type's flesh and the shade of a broad wing that was draped over me made me remember what had occurred the long night before.

I propped myself up, staring blankly into the water. There was no bloodstain. The carrion had been carried away, probably eaten by a monstrous Tentacruel or a Gyarados looking for easy prey.

The sadness was an ache, not a storm, but I felt it nonetheless. Sadness that I had raised Kashen to be such a tool of unexpressed anger and vengeance, that I had come to these islands to seek a thing of power and beauty, and then destroyed that very thing.

Like an unruly child in a room full of porcelain, I had only wanted to look, to see, to touch, but I had broken it, and there was no bringing back the dead.

I got up, careful not to disturb Kashen, who, although he had acted as any angel of death had, had still saved my life. It was hard not to feel grateful, but I couldn't imagine his flames and teeth and claws ruining the beauty and the perfection of a scared and angry Articuno, whose home I had invaded.

Towards the edge of the ocean I slowly limped, seeing something sparkling in the sun, washed ashore during the night.

A long feather. Rinsed of blood and violence, the feather shone purely, its color pale and blue and the only thing left of the beautiful bird.

I felt my tears come again as I picked it up and turned it over in my hands.

Maybe there was a lesson here after all… but I was so tired of learning lessons that came at such prices as these.

Was I such a bad person that I had to be educated through so much grief and wrath?

I ran a finger along the slick silk of the feather, and I turned to look at Kashen's deep, troubled face as he slept quietly on the beach sand. He had always been prepared to defend my dead Pokemon's honor. I had encouraged it. And the first time it had happened - the death of my second-caught Pokemon, the first I'd ever lost, Grigori, my innocent Caterpie. In my anguish, I'd chosen my Charmander to finish the battle as I knelt beside my fallen friend, and he'd returned to me with blood on his claws and in his heart. A constantly bleeding heart, it turned out: filled with mistrust and unspent wrath and sick punishment.

He hadn't lost anyone last night, but I suppose he'd had to make sure he wouldn't.

I had turned everyone into our enemy.

Including each other.

Including ourselves.

I held tight to the feather, and I stared into the murky waters of the ocean in silence.


	26. After the Lights Go Out

**Locke and Key:** _A Nuzlocke Story_

A/N: Wow. Thank you ALL so much for the reviews! :)

Leaf has done so much... but she still has quite a bit left to do.

* * *

"I am the monster in your head.  
And I thought you'd learn by now;  
It seems you haven't yet.  
I am the venom in your skin.  
And now your life is broken."  
-Breaking Benjamin; "Lights Out". _Dear Agony._

* * *

Drifting along, tugged by the ocean currents, lulled into a sleep under a hot sun – it had been a short, wasted day for me. I clung loosely to CeeCee's sleek back, my stomach churning in hunger. Since early in the morning, we'd been atop the ocean – and Cinnabar was just now in my line of vision, the edge barely lightening the dark ocean's sunlit horizon.

I rubbed grit from one eye, yawning.

_Wish I could've just flown,_ I thought irritably.

"Gong!" CeeCee cried, rushing forward.

I felt drained, despite the day I'd just slept through. The night before – the capture and training of CeeCee, the epic battle with Articuno, and the carnage of that battle, to be discovered in the morning – had left me feeling leaden and deadened.

It wasn't the time to be feeling like this. Cinnabar Island had a gym, and Blaine would be a challenge if I wasn't alert.

…But…

_Ribbons of crimson laced the ocean water, shaded to match the midnight sky. Feathers, long and crusted in thin layers of ice, settled upon the water._

_I clung to Kashen's warm chest as he dipped into the water, then pulled me out with some effort, his wings struggling to keep the rest of him in the air. His tail hung precariously low to the ocean's depths, but all I could do was cough the salt and death out of my lungs._

_There was something below us, as Kashen thrust into the air wildly, dripping water as he did. Something beat weakly at the water with shredded wings, something that pierced the air with one last long, melancholy shriek – something…_

_But I couldn't think of what it was until I was too dazed to think at all. I felt sand beneath me, and then I gave up my fight for consciousness._

Articuno had knocked me into the water, jarring Kashen so that he was too startled to catch me before I hit the waves. Just before I had been rescued, he had punished the bird… and the next morning, after discovering the remains of a legend, I'd seen how battered he was. His health was dangerously low, and there were frozen burn-like wounds all over his skin and wings.

Kashen.

He was a monster of my own creation.

A weapon, used by me, to destroy all that hurt me, symbolically or otherwise; a tool of revenge and violence.

Did Kashen still hold any love for me, his trainer?

Or was I master to him? Or, worse, the hand that gripped the hilt of a blade stained with ancient blood?

These thoughts had ravaged my half-sleeping mind as CeeCee struggled against the currents. I couldn't give any thought to my other Pokemon – Flitz, Frederick, Xander, Lyrica; they were the farthest things from my mind. All that seemed tangible to me were the Ice type carrying me through the water and the Fire type that had saved my life the night before.

* * *

Money was, by no means, low.

I had two options.

There was an enormous hotel that overlooked the gym and the expanse of ocean beyond it. Honestly, I'd had enough of the ocean, so it wasn't the view or the price that could possibly lull me in; it was the promise of free breakfast, a decent bed, and a hot shower.

But I knew I had tough battles to go – tough battles that required items to heal my Pokemon. Blaine, Sabrina, the eighth gym leader, the Elite Four… and what was left of Team Rocket. Plus, who knew when Green would be back for more?

Paranoia had settled into my bones long before I'd come to this island.

My other option loomed before me, an abandoned building with a loosely-hinged door and no electricity.

"Am I _really_ going in here?" I asked myself dubiously.

Beside me, Frederick frowned.

"Gravv," he intoned, giving me an arched eyebrow.

"…Look, whether you like it or not, we really _do_ need to level-grind before fighting Blaine. Anyways, it's a free place to sleep."

He sighed.

"It's okay. Come on, let's see what we can catch in here!"

It'd been sometime since I'd been excited to catch a Pokemon.

However, I was doomed to be disappointed.

As I eased open the door, wincing at the awful creak, my eyes scanned the ruins of carpeted floor inside. The roof had fallen in in many places; the walls were peeling, plaster and wallpaper in chunks on the floor.

I spotted movement in the shadows; a Raticate cowered away from us – such a disgrace to Tobias' species.

I curled my lip in disgust.

"Frederick, Rock Slide."

A quick crumble of rocks ended that pitiful existence. I felt no pity; Tobias would _never_ had cowered but trainers, even if she had a Rock type by her side.

_Tobias never even got to know you, Frederick… _I thought, glancing down at him. His jagged features revealed nothing at my ruthless commands, but I could tell he was displeased with the way I was acting. He was a very good body guard, respectful yet strong-willed, and I didn't give him nearly enough credit.

"Well… let's see what we can find in here, eh? Maybe a room with no rats in it to stay in for the night?" I rolled my eyes exaggeratedly, then began to loot around in the Pokemon Mansion.

It was really unknown why the massive old building had been so neglected, as it was on city property.

Also, there was little inside to tell me why it was called a mansion, when it really resembled more of a laboratory—not a place for living at all. There were cluttered desks with old, crumpled paperwork, some of the handwriting so faded that I couldn't make out a thing.

The bookshelves were empty; all of the textbooks had fallen onto the floor and were spilled to random pages, dirtied and gnawed at by the wild Pokemon that had infiltrated the building.

Why had Blaine and the city officials let this building go to waste?

…And what had happened here? Why was it so dilapidated and damaged?

"This is too weird," I murmured. Frederick grunted at my feet, lifting something that seemed to have been turned over.

"Grav, graveler?" He muttered, turning to me and holding something out.

"It's a… a diary?" I asked, taking it from him. I brushed dust off of the cover. A corner of it was blackened, possibly from the fiery breath of some of the Ponyta or Vulpix that lived inside of the building, but otherwise, the writing was legible.

I flipped it open to a random page.

_July 5th. Guyana, South America. A new Pokemon was discovered deep in the jungle._

There was more written beneath it, but much of it was smeared. I paused, pondering. July 5th of what year? I checked for a year on a few other pages, but there were no indications of how recent this was.

_New Pokemon are constantly being discovered. This is just a typical research lab, I guess,_ I thought, flipping back to my page.

_July 10th. We christened the newly discovered Pokemon 'Mew'._

I blinked.

"Mew…?" I glanced down at Frederick, whose face seemed to change expressions – a rare occurrence for a Graveler.

"Grav?"

"Isn't that…" I thought back to school. Some cultures worshipped Mew as the origin Pokemon, the one who brought life to all others. It hadn't been seen for many decades, and it was believed to have finally gone extinct (assuming there was more than one, of course.)

Of course, we in Kanto did not revere any Pokemon as gods, not even the legends of which only one existed.

We left that insanity to Johto.

Mew wan't a new species. It was a forgotten species, a hidden species... possibly not a species at all, but a single being of an unknown type and power.

I found another entry that wasn't blurred to hell, but it took me a few pages to find it.

_February 6th. Mew gave birth. We named the newborn Mewtwo._

Shock rippled through me.

Mew, the legend, had given _birth_? I stared thoughtfully into the open book, able to make out some of the words beneath the date.

_"Egg... injection... newborn.. test..."_

This was getting increasingly weirder.

"Graveler?" Frederick looked equally disturbed.

"Frederick, did you know that Mew gave birth? There really is a Pokemon nobody knew about. But what happened to it? How was it not another Mew?" I was only confusing myself, trying to think about it.

If legendaries gave birth, did it only spawn other legendaries, rather than continue the species' lineage?

I supposed it would make sense. The legendary Pokemon - well, they'd only been spotted alone. Never had an adventurer written in their journal, _Sept. 20. Came upon the peaks of the mountain range today. A flock of birds with fire on their wings flew so low to the tips of the mountains, I thought they'd rip open their soft bellies and spill out their lives. I saw one of them up close, guarding a nest made of bones and fur as well as grass. There was one enormous egg in there, large as the sun, tall as me, with flames circling it in patterns. Another Moltres to be born in the spring._

The thought made me think of the legendary Articuno that my Charizard had killed. I felt an involuntary shudder.

Frederick looked puzzled, reached out with a rough touch to steady my gooseflesh arm. I gave him a grateful look, then turned back to the book.

I noticed one last entry, buried in the back.

It was the final one, written several months after the one marking Mewtwo's birth.

And it was written in dark ink.

_September 1st. Mewtwo is far too powerful. We have failed to curb its vicious tendencies…_

Then there were only long clumps of blank pages behind it.

Ash crumbled between every few pages as I thumbed through them, and as I did, I noticed a maroon stain on some of the corners.

My first thought was, of course, blood. And the longer I stared at it, the longer it seemed to me that it was.

"This is too fucking weird," I said, slightly afraid now. A feeling was opening up in my stomach like a black hole, a worm hole seeking to consume everything it possibly could.

"Grav?"

I couldn't explain my concerns to Frederick. I could only stare at the pages, old, stained with ash, with faded handwriting and drops of old, dried blood on the corners.

What had happened in this lab? Had a team of scientists spawned something more powerful than Mew? Than _anything_?

And if they had… why? And what had happened to it?

I sat, entranced in my own thoughts. The possibilities were endless – and equally frightening. Somewhere out there – unless it had been destroyed – was a Pokemon born of Mew's DNA, a Pokemon so powerful and malicious that it had torn apart its creators and left the place of its birth in ruins.

And who were the scientists that had created this being? What had they been thinking?

A rustling behind me snapped me out of my bemused horror. I turned at Frederick's suddenly-fierce expression.

There was a man with a looting sack, grabbing up anything semi-valuable looking. A man walking on the edges of the shadows, so lost in his thievery that he didn't notice the girl reading a journal, her skirt short and dirty, a Graveler by her side.

"What the hell? Don't you people have any respect?" I growled, making him turn to me. In the darkness, I couldn't see his face very well, but his voice was equally annoyed.

"You're here, aren't ya? Surely you wouldn't grudge me the chance to hock some of this old shit for money," he complained. "Not like it matters, anyway. The cops ain't been down here for weeks."

A shaft of moonlight fell through some holes in the roof. In the cold white light, his Poke Balls glittered red.

I smiled. A plan.

"Okay. Let's have a battle. If you win, I leave you alone. If I win, you give me what you have and don't let me see you in here again."

He smirked, confident. "Sure. Go, Vulpix!"

The Poke Ball parted to reveal a small four-legged creature with rich red fur, six fluffy tails, and a lean, vulpine face. I'd seen the before. Chances were, he'd caught it while stealing, using it to protect him from trainers, wild Pokemon and police officers.

I nodded to Frederick. "It's your go."

Vulpix versus Graveler; I wasn't concerned. "Use Rock Slide, Frederick!"

Swifter, the Vulpix rushed forward to spit a mouth of flames at Frederick. His tough hide blocked most of the hit, but a lingering burn flared up around his four arms. _Shit._ He winced, but tugged at the earth, pulling stones through. He chucked them at the fox, burying it beneath them.

It didn't get back up.

"Damn," the thief swore. He returned it in a beam of red, then sent out his other Pokemon. "Go, Charmeleon!"

A familiar Pokemon appeared, scarlet and short-bodied, but with long, leaning arms that ended in metallic hooked claws. The flame on its tail flickered in the darkness like a large candle. I nodded to Frederick.

"You can handle one hit, right?"

He nodded.

"Okay. Magnitude!"

The Charmeleon's claws flashed with steel in the shadows; it lunged for Frederick and managed to rake them over his rocky skin. Frederick grunted – "Graa!" – but held his ground, then punched his fist through the cracked and water-spotted floor. A ripple of earth slammed into the Charmeleon, sending him down on his chest and pale stomach.

Cursing, my opponent withdrew his second Fire Pokemon. He gave me an angry look in the eyes, but I shook my head.

"A deal's a deal," I told him, patting Frederick on the head. "If you don't hand me that shit and scram, I'm afraid you'll end up far worse than your Pokemon." He looked at Frederick, burned and damaged, then the other five Poke Balls at my belt.

The decision was made. The thief sighed, then threw me the sack.

"Whatever. I didn't get anything of value, anyway."

As he walked away angrily, I pulled something out of the bag.

A scrap of silver metal was the first thing I touched. I pulled it out slowly, startled at the name inscribed.

_Fuji._

* * *

I could see stars through the holes eaten into the ceiling and roof of the Pokemon Mansion. Cinnabar was a relaxed city, ignoring the travesty that had occurred in this building years ago; ignoring the decay of a disguised laboratory, the shattered test tubes, the old journals crinkled with rainwater and blood; ignoring the fact that _something_ had been tortured into madness in this lab.

Its revenge was all around me. It was like the laboratory was breathing with the twisted ghosts of the creators. Exhale… pages fluttered around me, the salt-scented wind in my nose and brain. Inhale… I didn't want to, didn't want to find anymore scars the demon had left here.

Because that's what I was beginning to think this was. A project to create something monstrously powerful—a project to control something, someone, everything, everyone, with fear of this monster.

On my back, among the litter of the ruined building, I threaded my hands through my fanned-out brown hair absently. In the moonlight, I could see faint red highlights, sun-bleached pieces; I could see dry and split ends, could see pieces that had been singed off by Ember and Flamethrower attacks, or cut by Aerial Aces. It was the long, uncared-for hair of a trainer, and in my reflective, dark mood, I could remember the days I tried to forget.

Days of capturing a new Pokemon and spending hours training it to be caught up to the rest of my team. Days of mourning after that new teammate was lost, due to my careless mistakes, or due to fate. Days of the rage in Kashen's eyes after a Pokemon was buried, days of the apathy left behind after the fire burned cleanly away and the ashes swept by the wind.

I still had Articuno's feather. The ice had melted away. The beauty was gone. Now, all I had was a damp and frayed lump of fibers that was no longer sapphire. Only a dull, dead blue. And I had never saved anything like this from a fallen Pokemon before, had I? Hadn't mutilated the corpses of my Pokemon to carry grisly reminders with me. Aero's charred feathers had been buried with him. The sand of Leroy's platform had gone into his grave. I didn't tear a vicious fang from Tobias.

I closed my eyes. The rhythm of the sea echoed even in this 'mansion'. My Pokemon were asleep around me, freed of their Balls. Thieves stalked the night—now I knew that—and I wasn't worried for their safety. Who would dare attack a scarred and silent Charizard, or the slumbering Pokemon around it, all evolved fully (except, of course, Frederick and Xander)? The Nidoqueen, Electrode, Dewgong, Golbat, Graveler team of mine – frightening and rough, not cute and sleek, not masterful and carefully planned, just the sort of team that fit a girl like me. And I couldn't bear to lose any of them now.

So why was I still chasing Team Rocket? Why was I risking their lives for the chance to take on the Pokemon League? Why, why, why?

The question hung on my slack lips as I drifted into darkness. _Why._ No longer a question, in my dreams. A proclamation.

* * *

"_Nal, nal_!"

I looked up from the journal, my hair fanned out around my shoulders. I was sitting in a patch of sunlight, trying to interpret some of the faded writing, while my Pokemon played, trained, and sifted around the laboratory.

Lyrica ran towards me, something small in her enormous paws. Flitz rolled beside her, also looking excited.

"Electrode!" He exclaimed as he bumped into my ankles. I set him upright, amused.

"What'd you guys find that's so special?" I asked, looking up at Lyrica.

She held out her blue-gray claws, and I furrowed my brow in puzzlement. A little brass key, old-fashioned, that read "Cinnabar Island Gym" in tiny letters down the side.

"The gym key…?" I took it from her, holding it up in the sunlight.

There was no doubt. Blaine had left his key here…

…But why had he been here in the first place?

I was determined to find out.

"Hey, Frederick, CeeCee," I called, standing and dusting off my bottom. "Ready to slaughter some Fire types?"

* * *

The gym wasn't locked. I slipped inside, seeing a maze of gym trainers with machines in the corner.

One trainer noticed my puzzled expression.

"If you answer the trivia question on the machine correctly, you get to go to the next room without battling the trainers," he explained. "Most people just do that."

"And pass up free experience? Are they all fucking crazy?"

The trainer's eyes glinted happily. "I'm warning you, we're nothing compared to Blaine. Don't get cocky."

"Me? Cocky? Never."

But it was certainly hard not to. Frederick's Rock Slide and Magnitude made us formidable opponents; CeeCee's Surf washed away all the spunk of the Fire types thrown before us. Literally, we cleared the path to Blaine, who was sitting in the dark, waiting for me.

An older man with a white moustache and eyes hidden by dark-lensed glasses, I sensed he was mocking me.

"Hello, challenger. I see you easily swept my gym trainers." His voice was highly ironic. I narrowed my eyes.

"How would you like to find out if you'll be the exception?" I asked in a taunting voice. Frederick's heavy voice rumbled beside me, an avalanche on a snowy mountainside. "Although, I think it's obvious you won't be."

Blaine snorted.

"I've been defeated only once in a year. By a young man from Pallet Town." He smiled sardonically. "I suppose you're the counterpart from Pallet Town who has been sweeping the gyms along with him?"

I flinched. "We don't travel together. We're…"

"—Rivals," he cut in. "I get it. So, shall we? I take it you're familiar with the League rules."

"I _do_ have five badges, you know," I snapped.

"Go, Growlithe!" Called Blaine, cutting the preliminaries short. He tossed a Poke Ball into the air, releasing the Growlithe within.

A familiar puppy with tiger-striped fur appeared, a Pokemon Green favored.

"Frederick, go! Rock Slide!"

It didn't take much; the enormous pile of Rock type attacks sent the whimpering dog into a faint, crushing its smiling eyes and laughing tongue.

Blaine didn't seem fazed. Like all gym leaders, he had distraction Pokemon and tough Pokemon.

I was experienced enough to know this. His next Pokemon was Growlithe's counterpart, a sweet white-throated, lithe filly with a mane and tail of fire. Ponyta.

"Frederick, Magnitude!"

A crushing Magnitude 8 sent Ponyta under the earth, dizzy and in pain from the super-effective move.

Blaine was still smiling when he recalled his Ponyta.

"Go, Rapidash!"

Rapidash was the evolved form of Ponyta. Cute and cuddly features became long, elegant, deadly. Rapidash's fire was like the tangled mane of a wild mustang riding the hot winds of hell, and a thin, sharp horn protruded from its forehead.

I wasn't afraid, even still.

"Frederick, go! Rock Slide!"

He prepared to crush the beautiful horse, but it moved much quicker, galloping towards him. Blaine issued the first command he'd been able to accomplish:

"Fire Blast!"

Rapidash stomped on her hooves before us, mouth parting to unleash a spiral of thick fire. The fire exploded into a mass of power, driving Frederick backward with its hot force.

I squinted through the clean smoke that poured out of Rapidash's nostrils and gaping maw, searching for Frederick in the white-gray haze. He stood shakily on the battlefield, not too harmed, but burned and shocked by the blow.

He caught my worried expression, and tensed up, tearing up stones in the floor to crush Rapidash's lithe, quick-moving body with.

The flaming horse was defeated, falling gracefully to Frederick's attack.

Blaine's final Pokemon was unleashed. In a white flash, Growlithe's evolved form, the powerful and dangerous Arcanine, appeared. Banded in black and auburn like its puppy form, Arcanine also had a thick lion-like ruff of white and gold fur around its face and head. It was bigger than Rapidash, and also more fearsome-looking. Known as the 'Legendary Pokemon', Arcanine had been revered as a protector of Kanto for many years.

I wasn't sure if Frederick could take a Fire Blast from such a vicious Pokemon, so I recalled him.

"Go, CeeCee!"

My silly-faced Dewgong sped onto the field, staring bravely into the face of Arcanine, who snorted smoke.

Dewgong was half Ice, which made Arcanine's burning bursts neutral, but Dewgong was quicker than Frederick and had Thick Fat as his ability.

Blaine smirked.

"Arcanine, Extremespeed!"

"CeeCee, Surf!"

CeeCee prepared to splash a wave of water over the dog, but it moved with a speed I'd never even been able to imagine a Pokemon could own. Putting Surge's quick-footed Raichu to shame, the immense lion-faced dog charged at CeeCee and knocked him almost out of the field.

"Dewwww gonggong!" He cried, enraged as he pulled himself back up. The blow had hurt, it seemed.

CeeCee used the Surf that had dampened his fins. The enormous wave soaked the gym, spraying water into both Blaine's and my face.

The water-logged canine slumped, unable to use the Fire Blast on his lips.

Blaine sighed, beckoned me closer.

"Fine. Challenger, you have won. Please take—"

"Blaine."

I cut across the field, side-stepping the puddles, stones, and scorch marks. My mind was on one thing, the only thing I could think about during the battle with the Fire-type gym leader.

"I think we can skip all of that nonsense. I've only heard it a million times. I wanted to ask you about something."

He looked sharply to my hand, which held something small.

I held out the key to him, the brass glinting dully under the gym's heavy lights.

"What happened in the Pokemon Mansion? And what part did you have in it?"

To my surprise, he bowed his head slightly, still transfixed by the little brass key.

"You shouldn't have put your nose in that mess, trainer," he seemed to growl. He sounded like he had once been angry, but the madness was stale and faded. "Now you may regret ever going into the Pokemon Mansion..." He trailed off, no longer a sardonic threat, but an old man lost in memories he regretted.

I put my foot forward tentatively, hand closing around the key.

"You may not know this," I said softly, "but I'm already in a lot of messes. Specifically, Team Rocket."

At this, he jerked his head up, his surprise apparent.

I went on, gently but forcefully.

"One more won't hurt."


	27. Disconnection

**Locke and Key: **_A Nuzlocke Story_

A/N: This took _forever_. I'm sorry about that. Sorry to myself, most of all - I love this story, but this is a hard part of it to get through.

Hopefully, I'll be writing more of this, faster! - And then start _really_ working on _Angel of Vengeance_. (If you don't know, that's my other Pokemon fic - go check it out if you like, or if you just are bored. :))

As always, thanks for the reviews, the favorites, the alerts, and, most of all, reading this fic!

* * *

Justify, you waste away  
You dare to dream, but still you're too afraid.  
And now you're broken and deceived  
Lost to live this cruel reality.  
You're disconnected, so alone  
Severed ties from all you know.  
-Alter Bridge, "Isolation"; _AB III._

* * *

I breathed the smoke out slowly, letting night air creep into my lungs instead. Give the diseased a dose of pain-numbing medicine. Let them kill their selves quickly, but don't let them suffer.

My Pokemon were all safely tucked into their Balls, all six of them snugly at my hips and waist. A line of bullets, ready to be loaded into my slinging gun and fired at will. Defending me, my causes, my dreams – with no say in the matter.

My thoughts were like a train shooting down the tracks tonight, no conductor in sight. Pokemon had been my allies and my rivals since I'd begun my Kanto journey, but people had been my enemies – and, too often now, myself.

Why would anyone want to alter the beautiful relationships humanity had forged with Pokemon? We were friends in battle, and despite their potential for power, they aided us with support and sometimes love.

Team Rocket abused my emotions for my team in ways I'd never thought possible. They used their Pokemon as tools, just as they used people. That wasn't entirely uncommon – but it made me look at the creatures inside their cages differently.

More importantly – it made me think about myself differently. Did they realize how awful their fates were, in the end? Kashen knew – and it had changed him, no doubt about it. Xander knew – but his blind, stupid faith in me was strong. Flitz, Frederick, they'd seen Dusty's grave, but they didn't know about the throes of death. Lyrica, CeeCee – it was only a matter of time, was it not?

I exhaled a mouthful of toxic smoke, watching it spiral into the sky. I tapped cancerous ash into the surging sea beneath my dangling feet, leaning back on the dock partially. My poison climbed to the stars, then dissipated peacefully in a salt-threaded wind.

"Fuck _everything_," I muttered, tearing my mind away from my team.

Giovanni – goddamn him for perverting the relationship we had carefully built with Pokemon! Goddamn him for tampering with things beyond his power! Team Rocket was bad, no doubt about it – my vendetta with them had been personal, but now I realized I was a fool for taking their pillaging so personally.

Their boss had been after something far beyond the reaches of my mind from the very beginning – and I was a fool to think that such a powerful, vicious man was worried about a fifteen year old girl from Pallet fucking Town.

I remembered the shock on Blaine's old face as I mentioned my crusade against Team Rocket, and the way he shook his head in instant denial.

"_No, girl, you truly _don't_ understand who you're messing with!"_

"_No? I've seen Team Rocket let their Pokemon die to save their own lives! They've been—"_

"_Team Rocket is nothing without Giovanni, girl. And you don't know this man… you don't know what he's capable of, and you don't know what he's already accomplished."_

I truly hadn't – what an idiot! Ultimately, Green was right… I'd been forcing myself against them, and I didn't realize I'd be disappointed in the end.

That is… if Giovanni still had Mewtwo.

"_Mew…two?" I mouthed the words like rolling my tongue over marbles. "I remember that from the journal, I think. It said something about it being born from Mew, right?"_

"_Mewtwo wasn't _born_ from Mew. Not in the natural sense, at least." He lowered his head._

"_I didn't think legendaries could breed," I said skeptically. "Where did it come from, then?"_

"DNA splicing," I clucked, choking out a mouthful of smoke before chucking what was left of my cigarette into the sea. Destroying habitats again, I know – I just had to hope no stupid Magikarp decided to swallow it.

DNA splicing, indeed – taking genetic material from a Pokemon, then using it to generate a completely new species. Something never seen before; something with no natural instincts that Pokemon are born with – and, therefore, nothing to stop it from being corrupted.

"_That Mewtwo thing… it destroyed the lab, didn't it?" I asked, knowing the answer already. I _had_ read as much of the journal as I could have, after all._

"_It did more than that." Blaine sighed. "It destroyed the laboratory, yes, but it also killed some of our best scientists. Giovanni didn't care that it was a dangerous, bloodthirsty being—he only wanted it to obey him." He pushes his glasses back. "Good men _died_ for that creature's taming. Giovanni... lives were lost, and he saw no value."_

_I gave him a brief moment of silence before something clicked._

"_Obey him? Did he—"_

"_Oh, he did manage to convince it to come with him, come to his home, train with him, use its powers to its full potential."_

Pokemon aren't slaves, right? They work for us because they get something in return – love, respect, friendship.

Mewtwo didn't receive that from Giovanni.

"_But Mewtwo was tired of being used and mistreated by people. I've tried to contact Giovanni about the whereabouts of that Pokemon, but to no avail." He sighed. "It's been missing – and dormant – since it escaped from him."_

"_And he's looking for it," I murmured. "But why the fossil excavations? The Game Corner, Lavender Town… what do all of these have in common?"_

_Blaine turned away, looking thoughtful. "I don't know. I'm guessing he wants to exercise his authority to Kanto civilians – but the League refuses to take him down yet. I'm guessing they'll order us to stop him if he tries something more large-scaled, but we haven't received orders yet."_

"_Erika told me to weed them out of Celadon," I reminded him. "Not all of the gym leaders are unaware. But that was their only operation to date that was in a city. Mt. Moon is neither Brock's nor Misty's territory, and Lavender Town has no gym leader. It's a long way from Celadon, and an even longer way from Vermillion. Rock Tunnel is a good barrier…" I realized how crafty they honestly were._

"_Yes," Blaine agreed, looking pensive. "But I think Giovanni has little to no concern for us. He's still got more power than all of us combined."_

_He would say no more._

"How does he have power with the League?" I spat into the water, attempting to get the taste of ash and nicotine out of my tongue and teeth. I was already coughing a great deal more than I'd used to, and my Pokemon – Kashen, I suppose – believed that I was cigarette-free. How could I train for hours, then stop, hacking up a lung?

I couldn't afford to ruin my body before this.

I sighed, clenched my eyes shut, then rustled around in my pocket for the crumpled pack. Three left.

I dropped them into the sea, watching them float, ruined by saltwater, with a sickening dread.

What if Giovanni was paying the League? Was our region really that corrupted?

Paying them to look the other way for awhile, maybe?

I stood, brushing off my butt, and walked into a convenient store that was a few strides from the dock. A teenager was leaning against the counter, half-listening to the news on the TV. He looked half-asleep, actually.

I picked up a bag of chips and a Coke – fuck Dr Pepper, that shit's for pussies – and then noticed that, even though the TV was down low, I could make out a few words.

I jerked my head up, stunned.

_Speak of the motherfucking devil._

"TEAM ROCKET SEIZES SILPH CO" read the headline on the flickering news channel.

The cashier said casually, "Who the hell is Team Rocket?"

I dropped my food, leaving him to stare bewilderedly after me as I fled from the store.

I wrestled Kashen's Poke Ball from my belt, commanding as he was released: "Kashen! Fly!"

The white glow faded into my familiar Charizard. He lowered his neck for me to climb onto—something that I hadn't done since we had killed Articuno at the Seafoam Islands—and we lifted into the air, propelled by the panic that had welled up in my chest.

_Will the League really interfere—or does Giovanni have all of Kanto silenced?_

_Is that why Erika really wanted me to take them out?_

* * *

Saffron City was our largest metropolis, outshining even the massive Celadon. The city had _two _Pokemon gyms, the largest corporation in Kanto, and several clean little suburbs that housed more than Pallet Town and Viridian had combined.

Flying over the city - taken hostage, even - was like having two skies, one at your back and one at your belly. It was a little aweing - no neon, but dozens of window lights flamed the night.

I lowered Kashen into the shadows of the night, hoping no grunts standing guard saw me fly in. Any trainer with a powerful Pokemon would be sighted and, probably, obliterated at this point.

And Team Rocket and I weren't on the best of terms – not after Lavender Town and the Game Corner.

We landed in someone's backyard, causing a Growlithe sleeping on the steps to perk up and begin a reluctant growl in its throat.

I slithered off of Kashen's back and shoulders, pushing myself onto the manicured lawn of some lucky bitch. Nice little picket-fence lifestyle, they had here, and it was all under threat.

But were _they_ going to do anything about it?

"Hell no," I muttered, giving the Growlithe a warning look.

Kashen tucked his wings in, shooting the puppy a mild glare that quieted it for a moment.

"So… how are we going to get inside?"

He rumbled softly, glancing into the sky. The largest building in Kanto reached into the sky, windows glowing faintly with light.

I finally sighed, then shrugged.

"I guess I'm going inside the old-fashioned way."

* * *

Brent had had _way_ too much to drink, as usual. But Giovanni had paid for it, and, hey… why the hell not?

There was no way anyone would try to get into Silph Co. They effectively had the entire city cowed into submission. Sabrina and her gym trainers were trapped, the men in the Fighting Dojo were cowed, and, ultimately, they had won.

At last!

But even he, in his drunken stupor, knew something was wrong when a somewhat familiar-looking girl with tussled brown hair and a biting frown walked right up to the door and prepared to walk inside, despite him standing there.

"Hey," he gurgled. "Wait. You can't—"

"Were you going to stop me? Please. Be my fucking guest."

She snapped her fingers – he was a little stumped – and, like she was a fucking magician or something, a massive Pokemon took wing from the rooftops of a nearby building and swooped down. As it got closer to the ground, he realized – with a panic – that he _had_ seen this bitch before.

"Go, Golbat!" He fumbled, finally finding his Poke Ball – the only with him, unfortunately. One of the executives had confiscated his Sandslash…

"Kashen," the girl said, not sounding worried in the least, "Flamethrower."

Brent dropped to his knees in front of his incinerated Golbat, blinking away confusion.

"I remember you," he growled as she walked in. "You took the Cubone, didn't you?"

At first the girl looked confused. Then, slowly, she nodded.

He felt light-headed. "I killed its mother." _Are you an idiot? _His rational, sober mind, screamed. _This girl is fucking crazy! Giovanni's told you all to look out for her._

There was a spanning silence.

The girl said, strangely deadpanned, "You're all trash. I should kill you now, but it wouldn't help Dusty any." She turned and walked inside.

Crazily, Brent began to laugh.

What was that she'd said?

"_Anyways, I killed Dusty... so I guess I'm not much better."_


	28. I am the Liar

**Locke and Key: **_A Nuzlocke Story_

* * *

I've been burned so bad, but I still play with fire  
Sometimes naked truth is what I don't believe in.  
Don't ever tell me I'm falling apart;  
Don't ever tell me I will not survive.  
Don't ever tell me this love is a lie,  
'Cause I am the lie. I am the liar.

-Lacuna Coil, "I Won't Tell You"; _Shallow Life._

* * *

The Rockets knew I had breached their building – they had to, didn't they? I broke their guard completely. I had a mental note to immediately let Giovanni know that he had shitty security.

_He could have the best money could buy – Kanto's money, to be exact. _Man, I didn't even need my own writer. I was hilarious.

"Okay… so, what floor should I be going to?" I raced past an empty, scattered-looking receptionist desk. There was absolutely nobody on the first floor. _Nobody_.

"Nall," came a heavy voice from behind me. Lyrica lifted a massive claw, punched in the _second_ button, and gestured for me to go inside. I shrugged.

"Fine. We'll take his empire down brick by fucking brick."

Silph Co. looked pretty much how you would imagine from the inside. Sterile, littered with cubicles and small laboratory spaces on all of their floors but—I imagined—the top ones, it was obviously in the middle of a hostile takeover. Chairs were knocked over, papers flying through the air to settle on the floor.

Blood-edged footprints—boot prints?—were smashed into piles of paper, ruined computer pieces, and the tile floor in general. Where were the non-cooperative workers? Was that what remained of them?

I gritted my teeth in anger as I surveyed the damage. There weren't any grunts here, that I could see, but I knew they would be alerted of my presence and would attack me as soon as they had orders to.

Giovanni would see to it that I wouldn't get to him—or he should.

"Nal nal," softly intoned the Nidoqueen behind me. Her large, damp eyes looked at the scene before us with different eyes than I—piteous eyes. She was seeing empathy, as some Pokemon were apt to do.

I was seeing results.

"Well—looks like I found the bitch that the Boss Man's sent us down to find!"

I felt a claw on my shoulder, a stiff, gloved hand, that pulled me around to face a smooth-faced Rocket grunt. A bit of a lightweight, but his belt—from what I could see of it—had only a few Poke Balls.

"I don't know if I'm _the_ bitch, but I certainly fit the rest of the description," I said, as smoothly as I could while staring into his cold and placid eyes. "But, uh, hate to break it to ya—I'm not alone."

"No? We'll just take out whoever's with you, then." He reached to his belt—he had a walkie-talkie clipped to it—but a heavy paw stayed his arm. A steel-blue one, scaled and thick with muscle and claws.

"What the—"

"Send out your Pokemon, or be crushed." I smirked.

If Pokemon were the weapons of choice, I _could_ bring Silph Co.'s kidnappers down.

Couldn't I?

* * *

Floor two was cleared quickly. Lyrica's Body Slam, Toxic and Double Kick worked wonders on the Rockets Raticate, Zubat and Golbat combinations.

_Giovanni—your soldiers suck,_ I thought, surveying the damage _I'd_ caused. Rockets with exhausted, fainted, and battered Pokemon were chattering on their walkie-talkies.

In a massive building with hardened criminals, I suppose I should've been cautious—afraid, even—but I wasn't feeling much of either. I didn't step lightly, and I couldn't understand any my true emotions. Rage, indignation, and determination—but they were all dulled.

Lyrica kept handsy Rocket grunts at bay—I had thought to use Kashen, but she seemed offended by the idea. There was a lot of me in that Nidoqueen, no doubt-for a strictly female Pokemon who was infertile and rare, she was powerful, independent, and quite reliable.

I'd had two Ground Pokemon prior to her—a peppy male Dugtrio, and a wounded warrior, my Marowak. Lyrica wasn't either of them. She had hardness in her that allowed her to survive in battle, but she hadn't lost her heart.

I stroked the smooth side of her horn, smiling with pride.

"Alright, Lyrica. I'm gonna switch you out—can't take any chances."

She flicked a hard gaze at me. "Nal!"

"You're injured. Come on. Kashen could take this—"

"Nal!"

I blinked in surprise. "Fine. Not Kashen. Uh… CeeCee? I was going to save him for Giovanni—I'm pretty sure he likes Rock types…"

She flicked her eyes away.

"You're too proud, girl," I said, uttering a laugh.

We were on the fifth floor—fifth of many, I was sure—and Lyrica had been pounding Golbats left and right. She'd taken a few hits, even for her hard, scaly flesh. I was itching to bring out Kashen and his new technique, but I respected Lyrica too much to do so.

"You've got some rivalry going on. Fine. Flitz and Frederick can handle this."

I took her Poke Ball and recalled her, despite her unhappy expression.

And when I turned back to the staircase, I heard some muffled voices from above.

"_We can't just sit here!"_

"_What the hell are we gonna do, huh? They took our Pokemon."_

"_I think Jackson—you know, the new guy?—I think he still has one."_

"_Which one?"_

"_How the hell should I know?"_

A man and a woman, both sounding worried, frantic—arguing.

"Shit," I muttered, racing up the stairs. I found a woman, sure enough, redheaded (out of a box) and in a dark skirt suit. The man she was with was young and attractive, but looked more afraid than she did. He'd been the non-believer, I gathered.

Both were bound and pressed together closely, and when I arrived in a loud clatter of footsteps, they both looked up, the man fearful, the woman with some sort of hope.

"Are you the police?" The man asked, nervously flicking his eyes about. "Cause you sure as hell don't look like it."

"She's not Team Rocket," the woman said lowly. "That's a start."

"How's she going to help us, huh?"

I didn't say anything. Instead, I began to pick at the duct tape on their wrists.

"Are you with Silph?" The man pressed. "Never seen you before. Are you with the League? Or—"

"Are you ever going to shut up?" I pulled the duct tape free, then dropped it at his feet. "I'm not with Silph, the Saffron Police Department, the Sheriff's Department, the League, or, hell, _anybody_."

"Then how are you supposed to help us?"

"Because my team and I have brought Team Rocket down before, and I'm not gonna stop 'til they're down." I met his gaze, putting as much emotion as I could into my face—but he only laughed.

The woman elbowed him, standing up. She pursed her lipstick-painted lips. "I don't know who you are, but thank you for helping us. If you got this far, maybe you really can bring them down."

"I'd like to think so," I said, giving her partner a glare. "How many of you are there?"

The man interrupted. He was running a hand through his dark hair. "Several employees, many different departments. Our president's negotiating with Giovanni on the top floor."

"_Negotiating?_ Does this look like an official business agreement to you?" I shook my head, incredulous.

"Well… it did at first," he said, a note of remorse in his voice.

"I guess it did to everybody."

As I continued on my way, the woman called out to me.

"There's a man and a woman on the next floor—they can help your Pokemon." His eyes took on a hard glaze. "Get Giovanni the fuck out of Silph Co."

"That's the plan," I said, a smile curling my lips.

* * *

True to their word, after plowing through second-rate Rockets, I did find a man and a woman cowering in a room. Neither were bound—and one had two Poke Balls clipped to his belt.

"Are you the girl that's been helping Silph Co?" The man asked.

"Yeah. Leaf. Nice to meet you both." Neither offered their names, but he did shake hands. "Someone down below said you'd heal my Pokemon."

"Of course," the woman offered. "We've got Full Restores and Ethers. Just hand me their Balls, and I'll heal them up. You'll need it." Her eyes darkened.

"Yeah."

The man looked at me, still smiling. _Creep_.

"You know, there's something I'd like you to have, in case things get too tough."

"What?"

"I have this Pokemon that's been sitting at my belt for forever. I have a Water type already, and it's a _much_ higher level," he explained, setting a brand-new Poke Ball in my hand. I looked at it, confused.

"What is it? Why are you—"

"It's a Lapras. It's a good surfer, and it knows Ice attacks, too, but I have a Cloyster that does the job similarly. Take it. Just in case."

_I guess if something happens to CeeCee…_ "Thanks."

The woman handed me my healed Pokemon. I noticed a tremor in her hands.

"Are you alright?" I quickly inspected each Ball, noting, satisfactorily, that each was in good condition.

"No," she responded, sounding bitter. "We've all been subjected to a lot. Traumatic things. And… God, I hope that Giovanni rots in hell," she murmured.

"Do you know the young man here? He said he's helping us, too," the man interrupted.

"What young man?" A thought occurred to me. "What did he look like?"

"Oh, you know. Real handsome guy. Blond hair, blue eyes, taller, sportsy," the woman described.

_Green… what the hell is he _doing _here?_

"I've got to go, in that case..."

* * *

I got my answer when I ran out—straight into a patrolling Rocket.

"Gotcha!" He sneered, grabbing my flailing arms. I gasped, looking up into his face—and recognizing him almost immediately.

"You're that Rocket with a hurt leg…" I muttered. "Weren't you with the guard downstairs, at the casino in Celadon?"

He grinned, a sleazy, slimy visual that sent chills down my spine.

"Brent? Hell yeah. Me an' him were partners, and it took forever for me to turn him into a good Rocket." He narrowed his eyes. "I guess it hit him when that damned Marowak hit me in the knee that you gotta do what you gotta do." He winked.

_I killed its mother._

"You made him shoot Dusty's mother…" I couldn't believe it. Call me naive-but I hadn't expected it to be somebody I had already ran into.

And had had the bad luck to run into again.

He had my arms-I couldn't reach my belt. His grip was far stronger than my strength, as he was a thirty-something man, and I was an almost-sixteen-year-old girl.

What I was looking in the eyes was the embodiment of the evil I'd been fighting all along.

"Sure as hell did. But he didn't need goading, much. No! See, there's a killer in all of us. Just takes money and excitement to bring it out."

My lips parted—and he took advantage of that. The big man leaned forward to bite my lips, the stubble on his face scratching my skin.

"Get the fuck off me!" I shrieked, trying to kick him where it'd hurt the most—but he grabbed my leg, smirking.

"Just stop fighting what you really want," he admonished.

"Blastoise—_Water Pulse!_"

From behind the Rocket, a sound of something being forced from a gun hit our ears—and suddenly, the man who gripped me was flung forwards, me with him. I was so shocked that I didn't even realize that when he did, he was soaking wet.

And the hallways were, too. I struggled from under his massive weight, pinned to the floor, when I found myself staring at Green Oak, his starter by his side. Fully evolved. I had a moment to appreciate Squirtle's top evolved form—not as impressive as Charmander's, of course, but still pretty amazing. Fully cocked cannons on its shoulders, massive shell armor, and violent eyes—a big improvement from Squirtle and Wartortle.

"Help me up," I gasped, and Green ran forward, cursing under his breath. His shoes splashed into the puddle on the tile floor, and soaked the knees of his expensive jeans as he helped me stand.

"That was a horrible shot," I accused, glaring at his Blastoise, who looked as though he could care less. Kashen would have flamed me if I'd said something like that.

"No thanks?" Green asked dryly.

"Hell no. You let that disgusting thing touch me," I said, and just saying the words made me shudder violently.

A flash of anger crossed Green's normally calm blue gaze. "Sorry. I just heard you two fighting when I turned the corner, and I already had Blastoise out."

"It's whatever." It definitely wasn't. "What are you doing here? What happened to me being a wannabe hero, me trying to play the big—"

"Look, I don't know. You were right. And I saw this on the news… and I knew you'd go after them."

"How'd you know that?"

"'Cause I'm smarter than you give me credit for," he answered, using that hard, arid tone again. "We have to hurry. I don't know what's going on on the top floor, but it can't be good."

"No kidding." I took a handful of my hair and wrenched as much water out of it as I could. "What about this joke of a Rocket?"

I was, of course, referring to the pedophile on the floor.

"Joke?" The man coughed, sputtering his words with indignation as well as Water Pulse aftermath. "I'll fucking _kill_ both of you little kids for this!"

His hands held out two Poke Balls—one that released an enormous Ekans, and one that held a Sandslash. "You'll fucking _pay_!"

Green motioned to his Blastoise, who stomped over before the Sandslash, cannons primed. "You ready for this, Leaf?"

I nodded, holding the Poke Ball for Lyrica. "Of course I am."

"Water Pulse!" Green shouted, while I called, "Lyrica, go! Use Superpower!"

Double Kick be damned. Green blasted the opposing Ground type away, and Lyrica's massive attack proved to overcome type disadvantage. She lifted the long, lithe body of the adder, twisted it, and hurled it against its trainer.

The man fell, burdened by his Poison type, and Green and I shared a quick, triumphant glance.

"Let's go!"

Side by side, we took off—and I couldn't help but smile.

I wasn't used to having any human comrades.


	29. When You Can't Help But Follow

**Locke and Key:** _A Nuzlocke Story_

A/N; This has been written for awhile, but I just now got it edited. It was _rough_. Now I'm pretty happy with it. Thanks to all of you awesome readers. :3

* * *

Can you feel life tangle you up inside?  
Yeah, now you're face down on the floor!  
Oh, but you can't save your sorrow,  
You've paid in trade.  
When you can't help but follow,  
It puts you right back where you came.  
-Crush 40, "Live and Learn"_.  
_

* * *

The king of shadows sat, draped in darkness and deviance, on his throne of office chairs. He perked his head up, a fox that's caught a trace of blood in the crisp autumn air. His eyes, a predator's black stare, stared intently into the borderline rheumatic eyes of the man across from him.

The president leaned back, mouth pursed.

"Mr…" he struggled visibly to find a suitable title.

This amused the king. He arched one dark, pencil-perfect eyebrow. It was thick and masculine, much like the rest of his solid body.

"President Johnson, please—call me Giovanni," he said, tones perfectly blended and flowing into lush silk.

"Uh…" the old man appeared uncomfortable. Giovanni was glad. "Yes, well—Mr… Giovanni. I think—"

"Johnson—may I call you Johnson?" The Team Rocket executive didn't wait for an answer. Johnson wasn't about to give it. "I detest having to tell you this, but this meeting is not entirely built on what either of us think." He paused—for effect, of course. "Least of all you."

President Johnson—paler than he was when Giovanni walked in, an old man, the descendent of the Silph fortune, a man with sharp business sense but no common sense—sat back, stunned by the turn of events that had put his father's company in shatters.

"Johnson… were you under the impression that this business negotiation was without _sacrifices_?" Giovanni purred on—but the growl was hidden beneath the friendly, watchful panther's eyes.

"I was certainly not under the impression that this was a business negotiation, Mr. Giovanni," Johnson ventured in a half-mumble. Panic crawled down his spine like a nest of spiders as the man before him expressed mock surprise—and a real ice-hot hatred shone in those craven-tearing eyes.

"Oh?" Giovanni leaned over the massive oak table. There were papers on the floor. Johnson's young secretary—a blonde with too many buttons undone—was lying on the floor. Giovanni suspected he'd been boffing her in light of his wife's involvement with an enemy company. Johnson wasn't sure if she was dead or unconscious, but he was afraid to ask.

The man who'd knocked her around stood guard at the door, watching expressionlessly. The "R" on his chest gleamed under the lights like true blood. Johnson was sure he had been trained to erase all of what Giovanni said immediately from his mind, and trained even further to knock _Johnson_ around if he'd dared to oppose...

The cold rage in Giovanni's stare didn't communicate with the rest of his face. He appeared to be wearing a mask—what a poker player this man would be!—but Johnson noted that one massive fist, balled on his suit-clad thigh, was pulsing.

Suddenly, Johnson's fear caused him to become reckless. Why not?

All had been lost.

"Mr. Giovanni, you _invaded_ my company's headquarters, terrorized and injured my employees, and now you want… let me get this straight—a _business negotiation_?"

"Johnson," he said, pleasant in tone but icy in gaze, "you are currently the owner of the most productive company in Kanto. I am a powerful man—particularly in the eyes of the League—but I cannot bring my plans to fruition without your influence." He smiled—beguiling bastard, thought the old man. "I can't express to you _enough_ how important your cooperation, as an unpartnered business man—"

"Save it, Giovanni."

Both of the men turned, Johnson with relief in his eyes and Giovanni with unfiltered anger. They were both stunned—for different reasons—by what they saw opposing them in the doorway.

* * *

Green and I looked in at the two men through the glass windows. I was surprised at how calm the two men looked—or, that is, how calm _Giovanni_ looked. He was completely alone, while the other man—the Silph Co. president, I was guessing—had a secretary lying on the floor. Her blonde hair had spilled from its clip, and the side of her face that was turned towards us had a patch of violet developing over one eye.

"Good God," Green muttered.

"You have _no_ idea how capable this guy is."

"Capable of what?" He shook his head, a note of disgust embedded in his voice like a chunk of precious metal in a riverbed. "Capable of murder and shit like that. Not capable of surviving on—"

"Don't get a bunch of stupid integrity on me, Green. Giovanni is _far_ more capable than you or me." I chuckled. "I don't know if he's a more capable _trainer_, though…" I peeked in the window, suddenly urging myself to kick in the glass and confront the face of my nightmares.

Green was quiet for a moment. "What do you want me to do?"

I was stunned. _Is this the same _douchebag_ that warned Brock about me? The same _bitch_ that mocked me, no matter how often I defeated him in battle?_

My mind reeled.

"_Look, Leaf, I'm not risking my life to defeat these guys. I… promised my grandfather that I'd take the league, spread the Oak name again, make it famous… and I can't do that if me and the team I've worked so hard to raise are dead."_

"_Coward! You're too scared to—"_

"_Leaf, just because you feel like you have to prove yourself by becoming some big hero doesn't mean I do! I had a purpose for becoming a trainer from the start, and I intend to do what I set out to."_

Then, a new thought occurred to me: _Death changes you, Leaf. You know that. Green lost his friend. His Raticate. Maybe he's lost others._

I couldn't believe it, but I was looking at my dickhead rival with new eyes, and a new heart.

"I have to take down Giovanni. I want you to get Johnson the fuck out of there. Make sure that woman on the floor is alive. Get them out, and get the rest of the employees out, and then call the police."

He looked stunned. "Leaf, you can't stay in there with that guy! He's…"

He trailed off when he saw my face. "Fine." Green nodded towards the locked door. "How do we get in?"

I snorted, rolling my eyes. "Are you kidding me?" I plucked a Poke Ball, then tossed it. Mid-air, it flew open and revealed the white glow that solidified into my Graveler. He flexed his stony arms, all four of them, and glanced to me for immediate instruction.

I stared resolutely into Green's eyes. "Frederick, break down the door. Green, prepare to run inside after me. I'm bulletproof when it comes to Giovanni."

"If you believe that… you're an idiot," he said finally, but I could tell he was agreeing.

Frederick raised one golem's fist and pounded the door down. The two men looked up sharply at the clatter—and the looks on the old man's face reassured me that what I was doing was right.

The old, grizzled, graying president had relief shining in his watery eyes—but Giovanni's eyes were still cold, still untouched.

Green soon found out why—as did I. A Rocket, Giovanni's silent body guard, came forward fluidly to attack Green. I didn't want to turn my back on Giovanni and the old man, but I did momentarily, shouting, "_Green!_ Use your Pokemon!"

He drew back from the Rocket's harsh, blunt fists—I could see his cheek was cut, and I didn't want to know what the Rocket's knuckles were tampered with—and withdrew a Poke Ball. Spinning before us, his Pidgeot emerged to drive the man back. I stood silently, one hand on Frederick's rough head, while the mighty bird's wings knocked the man flat. Its talons stamped his back.

I turned, relieved, back to my foe and his captive. He had stood, knocking some papers from the table.

"Green—go," I said loudly, eyes on Giovanni. "Get that old guy out of here." He nodded, his cheek trickling a thin line of blood. He tore another Poke Ball from his belt, then chose it He chose them both, revealing his Growlithe, who was a larger, more mature-looking version of the pup I'd battled before.

Green knelt beside the blonde woman, nodding to the Growlithe; the puppy knelt down and lifted the woman onto his back. He ushered the old man away, the Pidgeot following them. The Rocket was still clutched in its talons, dangling in the air from his black shirt.

I knew how he'd make his getaway. And I wasn't sure if Pidgeot would be able to hold the Rocket mid-flight...

Giovanni didn't say a word. He pursed his lips tightly, eyes radiating no heat, as mine would—instead, they seemed frozen over, a still lake in a frosty storm.

"I should have expected that my grunts wouldn't be able to thwart you," he said slowly. "But what makes you think you—a child—can storm into my operations, unabashed, and defeat _me_?"

"The League will realize what you are doing if I can bring you down!" My words echoed in the tight acoustics of the room.

Giovanni shook his head, seemingly incredulous.

"You think the League gives a damn what I'm doing? They're not, my girl. I can assure you—I have the League's full support. How could I not? I am the most powerful man they have—and certainly the most influential."

Mind reeled, but I clung to Frederick; I couldn't believe what he was saying—it didn't add up. A man like Giovanni could lie his way out of a cereal box, right? And take the child's prize with him.

"Why don't you fight me and make me believe you?" I flared. "I've beaten you before—I can sure as hell do it again!"

Giovanni lifted his lip, but obliged by pulling out fancy, unidentifiable Poke Balls. He said nothing as he tossed the first one.

The Rhyhorn I'd faced before tugged his forepaw up, preparing to charge.

I nodded to Frederick. "Go! Earthquake!"

"Take Down, Rhyhorn!"

The massive, bulky Rock type charged—and Frederick smashed all four fists into the top floor of the building.

I guess I didn't think that one through. The building wasn't built to withstand Pokemon attacks—powerful Ground ones, to boot. It wasn't a gym—it was a business building.

The walls seemed to snap around me, and the floor caved in. Giovanni's eyes widened in delayed shock, and I muffled a scream, instead issuing a sharp bark of fear. I dove for Frederick, scraping my chin on his craggy flesh.

The four of us—the two Rock types, Giovanni and I—fell in through the floor, me clutching my Pokemon. We fell through to the next floor, my eyes clenched shut, and landed hard. The rubble that fell around us-chunks of plaster, hardwood, and gods knew what else—created a white, smoky dust that clogged my lungs and caused both me and Giovanni to hack.

Frederick was partially stuck in the tile of the next floor down, and struggled to pull himself out of the crater.

The Rhyhorn struggled to rise amidst the debris from the ceiling, but the Ground move had disabled him. It collapsed.

I stood as Frederick struggled to free himself, relieved that I was mostly unharmed. Skinned knees were nothing compared to what my stupid mistake could have caused.

"Girl—you've got spunk." Giovanni stood, shaking plaster from his dark, fancy suit. Blood trickled slowly from one corner of his mouth, and when he opened it, I could see his entire mouth floating in crimson. _Should've held onto that Rhyhorn._ "But how much more can you _handle_?"

The emphasis startled me out of my stunned reverie. He plucked another Ball, releasing his Kangaskahn.

"Frederick—return!" I had a plan. "Go, Lyrica!"

Lyrica and Kangaskahn faced each other, two defiant, fierce female Pokemon—but Lyrica calmly regarded her foe with distaste.

"Kangaskahn, Mega Punch!"

White energy glowed from one massive fist-paw; Lyrica prepared to dodge, but I decided to take a chance.

"Try to catch it, Lyrica!"

Her own limbs flew up to catch Kangaskahn's punch, but it clocked her in the face, sending her staggering backwards. Blood flew from Lyrica's mouth, much like it was from Giovanni's.

Kangaskahn stepped back, uninjured.

_Damn it._ Lyrica's ability was Poison Point, but it hadn't worked.

_Fine._ "Toxic!"

Lyrica parted her jaws, slinging black toxic slime from her pale jaws. The projectile hit; Kangaskahn was coated in a slick ooze, badly poisoning on contact.

"Damn it." Giovanni narrowed his eyes again, black slits in his now-pale face. "Kangaskahn, Mega Punch!"

"Lyrica, Superpower!"

_Just one hit should do it, Lyrica… just one hit._

Power surged in Lyrica's veins; her limbs pulsed. She smashed both fists into Kangaskahn's chest and stomach—she flew backwards, skidding towards Giovanni's blood-spattered feet. The Fighting-powered move destroyed the Normal type easily.

"Kangaskahn, return." I was tense, but what appeared next, I had expected. Onix—with its bountiful weight and length—burst through the already-broken ceiling and made the floor beneath us creak warningly.

"Lyrica, return!" I narrowed my eyes. "CeeCee, go!"

My Dewgong appeared in a flash of white.

A Water/Ice type versus a Rock/Ground type. Giovanni realized that the risks were great.

"Surf!"

"Rock Slide!"

But not impossible.

Rock was super effective against Ice—and Water was double effective against Rock and Ground.

CeeCee was hit with enormous boulders that smashed him into the ground, blood bursting from his sleek white body. I watched the droplets with mortified shock.

However, he'd glimpsed the stones and heard the attack before the impact; he'd managed to spew the Surf attack from his mouth.

Onix was hit about the same time CeeCee was; the enormous, now-soaked rock snake roared in agony, and as it fell, it released an overpowering smell of wet dirt. _Rainstorm in a wasteland,_ I thought, crazily. Its impact broke the stressed floor again.

CeeCee, bloody and sore as he was, let out a sharp bark as the floor collapsed beneath him, Onix, and Giovanni himself.

I was safe on the edge—but there was no way I was letting that stubborn, good-natured Water type go.

I jumped, as I had with Frederick, and grabbed the slick Water type.

This time, blood came off on my hands, but I tightened my grip. I wasn't going to risk my life, and his, for nothing.

When we landed, I didn't feel a thing—I just heard the soft cries of my Dewgong as it whimpered its pain away.

Giovanni was lying behind me, somewhere where the groaning Onix was coiled.

But somehow I felt a peace descend over me, chasing me into a black void.

_It's over. Team Rocket's dead—even if Giovanni isn't._

I was right.

I was wrong.

I was delusional when I heard Green above me, felt his arms hooking around my armpits and lifting me up.

"_Leaf—you fucking idiot…" _A failing voice. Green, yes. I tried to smile, to tell him I was alright, but I was too tired to really move my face the right way.

"_You almost killed yourself—your Dewgong's in critical condition—and Giovanni—"_

"I hope he's rotting in hell," I managed.

* * *

I was still in Saffron when I woke up, but three familiar faces around me caused me some mild alarm.

I was in a hospital, surrounded by Green, who leaned against the wall with a tired, glazed expression, Professor Oak, who was standing near the doorway with a taut facial expression, and my mother, who was sagging against the doorway, murmuring with Oak.

"Oak? …Mom?"

I sat up sorely, staring in confusion.

"Leaf! Oh, thank God," my mother gushed, rushing to the bedside. I studied her; she more or less looked the same, add some wrinkles, take away from non-gray hair.

"Mom… what are you guys doing here in Saffron?"

"Are you serious?" Green butted in, looking incredulous. He stood, raking a hand through his hair that, for once, didn't look perfectly in place. He looked like hell—the cut on his cheek had puffed up, too—and I relished every second of it.

Immature, even on a hospital bed? Damn straight!

"What—" I began, but Oak walked forward, greeting me with a warm, relieved smile. His eyes looked as tired as my mother's, but he didn't appear to have aged a day.

_Green in fifty years,_ I thought, suppressing an eyeroll.

"Leaf, you owe Green your life," he said mildly.

My mother nodded.

"Damn straight," he said, pride seeping through his voice. "Pulled you out of that rubble myself. I mean, the President of Silph Co. is _pissed_ about his building—"

"Seriously? We saved him!"

"Yeah, well, I guess it came at too high of a cost. Anyways, he left something for you."

He fumbled in his pocket, then brought up the biggest Poke Ball I'd ever seen in my life. Plump, shiny, and purple, the Ball was marked with a gleaming gilded "M". I took it from him, studying it, rolling it around in my bandaged hands.

"What the f—" I risked a glance at my mother and Oak, "—heck is this?"

"I think he called it a Master Ball." He shrugged. "A Silph Co. prototype. I guess it's supposed to have an impossible catch rate. Nothing can break it."

"Really?" I was skeptical. What kind of Poke Ball was _unbreakable?_

"Well, you'll have to try it out. There's only one." He shrugged.

"What'd he give you?"

"Nothing yet. I'm hoping he'll mail me a check or something." He smirked.

My mother cleared her throat, indicating that she had something important to say. I turned, raising an eyebrow.

"Leaf," Oak said, slowly, "You're close to defeating the League. I know you realize this."

"Yeah. I do." I smiled. "Not alone, of course."

"Of course not." My mother snorted. "A trainer's nothing without their Pokemon. Everyone in this room knows that. For damn sure."

Green nodded quickly and glanced at me; Oak only smiled.

Something occurred to me, almost randomly. _Rainstorm in a wasteland.._. "Is CeeCee okay? My Pokemon—did they find them all? Where are they?" Panic set in.

_CeeCee… whimpering in pain. Me jumping in after him… blood on his white fur… and in my hands—_

"Oh God," I muttered, misery choking my throat. "My God, no, not again—"

"He's not dead, Leaf," Green cut in. He made me look him in the eyes. "I would have _told_ you if something like that happened!"

"We wouldn't beat around the bush about something that serious," Oak agreed. My mother made a small noise of concurrence.

"Well… are they all okay?" I finished weakly.

"Yes. All six of them. Your belt is over with your clothes, and we made sure all six of them are there."

Oak took out a slip of paper, read off the list of Pokemon and their levels.

"Charizard, 43; Golbat, 43; Electrode, 42; Graveler, 44; Nidoqueen, 45; Dewgong, 44."

"They're all there," I said, breathing a sigh of relief. "Thank God."

"Yes, thank God. And thank Him you're not injured, as well," Oak said mildly. "You could have been killed. Or at the very least _paralyzed_. If it weren't for the Dewgong you landed on…"

He trailed off. I shook my head, unconcerned.

_We're all okay, so we're all okay. That's that._

"Leaf, you have two badges left, and then the Pokemon League," my mother said, her voice slow. "If you defeat the League—what will you do next?"

"I don't know."

It was a damn good question. Could I give this life up to go back to a domestic life of school, parties, friends, and a bed in my mother's home? Could I live in the same town without competition, without fight, with faces that I know and who judge me?

But after Kanto was conquered—what would be left for me?

And if I lost, _could_ I go back to life as I knew it?

But I knew the answer to that question, as I gazed at Green and Samuel Oak, at my mother, the only other Brannigan I knew of.

There wouldn't be any life for me.

I was the only one who knew that.


	30. Welcome to My World, She Said

**Locke and Key: **_A Nuzlocke Story_

A/N: Thanks again for all of the reviews, favorites, alerts, and whatever the heck else I've been getting, guys! I sort of wanted to move along in this chapter, so that's why it jumped a bit. Hope you enjoy.

**EDIT** - I exported it just now. I didn't really look at this myself earlier, so I went back and added and changed a few small minor things.

* * *

Welcome to my world, she said;  
Do you feel alive? she said.  
It's all a bad dream spinning in your lonely head.  
Welcome to my world, she said;  
Separated world, she stayed separated.  
Down poison; down poison.

-3 Doors Down, "Down Poison"; _The Better Life.  
_

* * *

The moment I'd been dreading since I'd finished forming my team was here.

I couldn't help but be impressed with the inside of Sabrina's gym; she'd _really_ put a lot of ridiculous work into it. There were singular pods, similar to office cubicles, but big enough to have a Pokemon battle in, with a trainer standing in the middle of four warp panels.

_Warp panels_. Are you hearing me right? You step on one, the world flashes before you (kind of like a weak acid trip) and then, BAM! You're in a different part of the gym, just like that.

And Sabrina doesn't come to you. Oh, hell no. That'd make everything too damn easy. No, you have to do this until you stumble upon her yourself.

I sighed, cupping the Great Ball in my hand tighter. I didn't have much of a defense against Psychic Pokemon at all. Flitz had the highest Special Defense, so he was the best bet of a shield I had. I'd have to use Kashen for offense; Psychic types have piss poor Defense as a general rule, and his slashing claws and flight moves would help out with that.

But other than that? I had Xander, who had a vicious dark Bite but was vulnerable; I had Lyrica, who was very much out of the question; I had Frederick, who had sloppy Special Defense; and I had CeeCee, who was pretty much my other option, if something happened to Kashen or Flitz.

I'd felt cocky before coming in here—I'd just soloed the fighting "gym" beside Sabrina's, using only Xander, of course, and with Kashen as a good back-up. I'd obtained Orion the Hitmonlee, who was Box fodder for now, and that was it.

My thoughts at the time: _Xander's Bite will be able to annihilate Sabrina's gym! I'll just be _so_ fast that-_

Now: _What the fuck. Don't you remember Koga's gym?_ A surprise Hypno with a staggering set of Psychic moves had almost wiped Xander out.

I sighed. I hated not having an advantage, but that was what was going to happen.

"Are you ready?" Intoned my first gym trainer. She had long hair, bound behind her in a hippie-like fashion, and a sari. I suspected she had crystals in one of her pockets.

"As I'll ever be, I guess." I tossed the Great Ball, releasing Flitz.

The other girl chose a Kadabra. Flashbacks to Green's young Psychic type - and the only one of his Pokemon I had difficulty fighting - plagued my mind as I stared into its solemn brown eyes.

Beside me, Flitz sparked, grinning his sardonic _Let's do this thing_ grin.

_Let's try this out,_ I thought. "Okay, Flitz..."

* * *

By the time I'd chewed my way through Sabrina's leather-like armor, I felt weary, achy, and pissed off. I'd had numerous close calls, especially with the bullshit move Future Sight, and Flitz and Kashen were both giving me angry looks throughout the battles.

But I finally stepped onto the right warp panel. The world sizzled, faded like smoke, and then there I was, staring around a room with only a single warp panel—the one I was standing on. Sabrina was sitting, not standing, and her black hair fell like a sleek curtain around her pale face and long, lean body. Her eyes were closed, and she appeared to be concentrating on something.

"Uh... I'm guessing you're—"

"Sabrina," she finished, opening her eyes. The flash of color was startling—they were almost a violet shade, and eerily blank. "I've seen our battle already."

The way she said it made me a bit wary. "Oh yeah?" I wasn't sure what else to say. Was she implying that I defeated her, or that I had lost?

She fixed me with her empty purple gaze. I suppressed a shudder, determined to appear as strong as I wanted to be. "Yes. Would you like to commence, knowing that I know the outcome already?"

"I didn't come this far for nothing."

She nodded, as if expecting thus. "Then, challenger, I assume you know the rules, if you are here in my gym. Choose your first Pokemon, and I will choose mine."

I nodded, then pulled Kashen's Poke Ball out. "Go! Kashen!"

As soon as the form of Charizard became detectable in the light, she swiftly stood, pulling a Poke Ball from her belt and into the air as she did. "Kadabra."

Kashen snorted smoke and spread his wings, but Kadabra only closed his eyes in calm preparation. I supposed, in that moment, that Pokemon truly did take after their trainers.

"Kashen, Flamethrower!"

Sabrina countered, "Kadabra, use Future Sight."

_Shit._ Kashen had already parted his jaws and blown fire over Kadabra's body. It didn't appear to do too much damage, but it had my desired effect. The Psychic type was burned.

However, even as its thin tawny fur was singed black, it shot a ray of psychic energy around Kashen. It didn't strike him, only settled into the floor and the walls until it disappeared.

_That's gonna hurt when it hits,_ I thought with a sigh. "Okay, Kashen, Fly!"

He spread his membranous orange wings and pulled himself into the air, too high for Kadabra's attacks. Like a vulture with his eye on carrion, Kashen circled the ceiling of the gym, whipping his flame-capped tail around.

"Kadabra, use Reflect!"

A barrier shimmered before the Psychic type, and I mentally groaned. _Fucking..._ as the move dictated, Kashen lunged at Kadabra, hitting the barrier and knocking his skull. As a result, the barrier shimmered and hit Kadabra lightly, taking the majority of the hit.

"Fuck. Kashen, Flamethrower!"

What other option did I have? I rolled my eyes and nodded for him to proceed. Luckily for me, the flames snaked around the shield and consumed Kadabra. He stood standing for a moment, but then the embers of his burn status crawled over his fur and he shook, then collapsed.

I laughed. "Great job, Kashen!"

"Kadabra, come back." Sabrina returned her Pokemon with no expression. "Mr. Mime."

"Kashen, use Slash," I said as the clown-like Pokemon appeared. Blue, wiry hair like puffs graced his white, plump face with red cheeks and a goofy smile. His retarded appearance angered _me_, so I guessed that Kashen had a reason to tear into him with flashing nails.

The attack did more damage than I expected; blood graced the air of the battlefield, sanguine drops hitting the sleek floor. _A critical hit,_ I thought with satisfaction.

Mr. Mime closed his eyes and clapped his hands together. Sabrina intoned, "Psychic."

_Shit..._ it was a powerful move. Blue energy roped around Kashen's body, outlining him and his dripping claws, then brought him to the ground, holding his head and roaring.

But as soon as the attack was over, he shook his long-nosed head, grunting in pain. "Good, Kashen. I just need..." I set my backpack down and started rummaging through it at top speed. _Max Potion, come on, I know I have at least one..._

Thank God my fingers brushed one as soon as I did. I sprayed him heavily, using the entire bottle, and his wounds—invisible to me, as Psychic moves rarely left visible marks—began to disappear.

But just as I stepped back, the walls and floor began to glimmer. Kashen, surprised, looked down at his feet—and the energy from Kadabra's Future Sight rose up and gripped him in a random flash of light.

_Damn it!_

I reached for another Potion—this was my last Max Potion, though I still had Hyper Potions—and fully healed him again. Kashen wasn't able to shake off his pain this time, though; his claws were shaking as I pulled away from him.

"You okay?" I muttered. "I can send CeeCee or Flitz out, if you want."

He shook his head after a very brief hesitation. The hard blue look in his eyes told me clearly that he would avenge his agony.

"Then go. Fly!" I shouted, drawing away from him. He took to the ceiling of the gym again, and Mr. Mime could only fire useless Psychic attacks that missed him.

After a full turn had passed, he smashed into the Mr. Mime again, driving it into the ground and smashing its shitty defense into a thousand pieces.

Sabrina withdrew Mr. Mime. Her blank face told me nothing. "Alakazam. It's your time, now."

This was what had scared me the most. Her Poke Ball unleashed a light that became something more fearsome-looking than the Kadabra I'd grown accustomed to seeing in the gym and with Green himself. Alakazam evolved from trading. They were long-legged, human-sized creatures, with long, intelligent faces and cold eyes. They had lost Kadabra's fluffy tail and Abra's gentle face; Alakazam was lean and somewhat murderous-looking.

Or maybe that was just me.

"Kashen, Fly!"

Sabrina let a ghost of a smile touch her lips. "Alakazam, Future Sight."

_Shit... again?_

Kashen threw himself into Alakazam, and the Pokemon staggered backwards and fell. However, he immediately rose again, appearing injured but not mortally. Kashen landed heavily back on the gym floor, growling impatiently.

"Alakazam, Psychic!"

As she said this, her voice became determined.

_No!_ Alakazam's Psychic blast shimmered around him, then shot forward and consumed Kashen almost entirely. I could only watch, my heart thrumming in horrified fascination.

The massive Charizard had only glared around him as the bright blue power shot up, writhing around his legs and striking his wings and throat. His claws clenched, balled like the fists at my side were. He screeched once, a head-splitting wail that was unlike anything I'd ever heard him make before. The energy around him became blinding, taking away the solid lines of his body and making him appear a hellish dream figure.

It honestly looked as though the move was erasing Kashen's molecules. Eradicating his entire existence.

_Maybe it is..._

My thoughts sent a stab of rage and terror through my chest, cold as an icicle reaching into my ribcage. My Charizard's balled-up claws rose to knot against his long face, then his paining skull. I only stared, stricken with cold fear, as Kashen keened his rage and pain to the acoustics of the gym.

He collapsed, the energy fading from his citrine scales. I waited for him to stagger up, but it didn't look like he was going to.

I coughed, all of my fury and horror mingling in that one rough noise. "No... Kashen!" How many times had I uttered that exclamation? Only the name had been replaced with so many. _Aero, Tobias, Leroy, Dusty—_"_No_!"

Sabrina lowered her gaze briefly, then swept it up to meet mine. "Do you forfeit?" She asked with agitating calmness.

"Kashen?" I whispered, and I felt the first wet glint of tears on the tops of my cheekbones. My eyes had ached and throbbed so bad, I hadn't even realized how close I was to crying. "Kashen, get the fuck up. I can't do this without you. There's almost no point!"

He didn't move. He wasn't moving. I lowered my head, letting one strangled sob escape.

But I heard Sabrina inhale sharply, and Alakazam mutter his name. I looked back up, blinking through my tears.

It was clear what they were gasping at—Kashen hadn't risen from the dead, but he was pulling himself up from the ground shakily, clearly as close to death as any one Pokemon could be... but he wasn't dead, wasn't dead, wasn't even _dead_.

"God, Kashen..." I suppressed the urge to rush up to him, throw my hands around his long neck and pull myself close to his muscular chest and feel the knobs of bone his wings created on his back and warm myself with the fire from his scales-

"Return." I didn't care how stubborn he was. I was going to finish this, but I wasn't risking Kashen's life anymore.

He disappeared as he was still rising. I chose CeeCee instead, and as the white seal slid happily onto the field, I realized that he, too, had come close to death recently.

That was how the League was, when you got stronger and further along in the world. Death stared at you from every dark pocket of shadow, hidden in every crevice.

"CeeCee, Take Down!"

His full-bodied slam took Alakazam to the floor, and I was relieved to see the enormous bogeyman from my head eliminated. _Finally,_ I thought, and congratulated my Pokemon. "Good job, CeeCee."

Sabrina was still looking quite confused. "Return, Alakazam." I noticed her puzzled expression—and the distracted way she was looking at Kashen.

Perhaps I'd win this after all.

"Venomoth."

A fluttering purple insect—similar to Butterfree, but with poisonous scales tucked onto its wings—appeared before us. It was the evolved form of Venonat, one of Koga's Pokemon, too.

"Oh, hell," I said, laughing. "This isn't even a Psychic type. CeeCee, Surf!"

The Dewgong pulled a wave of water up and rode it into the Venomoth. The waterlogged Bug type sank to the floor.

Sabrina shook her head, still looking highly confused.

"I'm never wrong," she said.

"What are you talking about?" I said, very pleased with myself and with CeeCee. I was still petting the silky fur around his sharp horn when she looked at me, a new depth of fear in her strange eyes.

"I saw... I saw your victory, but I also saw the death of your Charizard. I swear, it was dead in my vision. I saw it fall and I saw its heart stop beating and-"

"Shut the fuck up," I snarled, jumping to my feet. How dare she? My starter was alive, I had defeated her, and all she could worry about was that her pretentious psychic bullshit had been wrong. "Why don't you stop worrying about killing other trainers' Pokemon and give me my goddamn badge?"

She swung her eyes away. "Yes. I apologize. I just..." she pulled a case from beside the chair she'd sat in when I arrived. She handed it to me, and I snatched it from her delicate hand.

"Just be glad you've passed someone on to the Pokemon League. Oh, and another thing..." I set the case in my backpack carefully, then stalked forward again. CeeCee watched me, wide-eyed, as I smacked Sabrina across the face.

She stared at me in shock, covering the imprint with her own slender white hand. "What-"

"That's for letting your fucking city get taken over by Giovanni. You are _not_ a helpless civilian, Sabrina!" I pulled my slapping hand into a fist, but I didn't dare strike her again. "You're a freaking _strong_ gym leader. You command Pokemon of one of the strongest types. You have gym trainers at your beck and call. But _no_."

She sank back into her chair, hand still pressed to her cheek, looking dazed. I continued, ranting still. "Instead of getting out there to fight him and bring peace to your city again, you sat here in fear, reading visions of death and chaos, and _I_ saved you and your people."

My breath had run out near the end, but my anger didn't fade. She shook her head weakly—as if to deny my accusations—but I turned away from her, done with Sabrina of Saffron City.

Gym leaders did more than battle trainers and give out badges. That was universally understood. When a trainer made a request to be a gym leader, they were making dedications that no normal human being would be able to uphold. A gym leader not only trained a single type of Pokemon and set up a gym in a well-known city. Those Pokemon were not tools, but extensions of themselves - and it was clear to me that Sabrina's Pokemon were very devoted to her, and that they had nearly become one.

They protected those cities from danger. They were nothing, if not the warrior-like counsels of their city's mayor. They were the often single-handed force that saved their cities from disasters, natural or not.

And none of Kanto had done that so far. _In sickness, and in health,_ I couldn't help but think angrily. Brock and Misty both allowed Team Rocket to pollute Mt. Moon. Lt. Surge and Erika ignored Lavender Town, and Erika enlisted _me-_a random teenage girl with semi-powerful Pokemon-to stop the Game Corner from corrupting her entire city. Blaine had _worked_ for Team Rocket, and helped spawn an unstoppable and unlocatable monster; Sabrina lived in fear of the shadows Giovanni cast upon Saffron.

_Well, I'll make sure Team Rocket hasn't ruined Kanto completely,_ I thought as I left the gym. _Someone has to..._

At that, I thought of Green. And I thought of Kashen, almost dying at the hands of a cowardly psychic.

I sighed and kept going.

I had one more badge to get, and I had no idea who the gym leader was.

But a shadow lurked at the back of my mind-one that had settled in after Erika needed my help. After Blaine confessed his sins to me as one would to a priest. As Sabrina had watched a young girl save her city while she remained in the darkness, guarded by her future sight.

I needed to return home.

That much was clear.


	31. I Hear You Screaming

**Locke and Key**: _A Nuzlocke Story_

_A/N:_ Everyone, say a special thanks to **FirebirdXoX** for her amazing beta-reading skills. :) She's the reason this chapter is what it is-believe you me!  
Also, I feel the need to say that the song lyrics that you see in this chapter-and every chapter-are listed in my profile (the official songs, that is.) Thank you, **IndigoCrescent**, for that. x3  
Okay, everyone-here it is!

* * *

All of my hate cannot be found-  
I will not be bound by your thoughtless scheming now!  
So you can try to tear me down,  
Beat me to the ground, I will hear you screaming..  
-Evanescence, "Thoughtless" (cover; originally by Korn), _Anywhere but Home_.

* * *

I couldn't help but keep myself away from Pallet Town. I had come close enough to stand on the hill, the grass parting beneath my dirty, torn shoes. I had stood on the soil where I'd caught Tobias—where I was standing now, as a matter of fact, trying not to think about the blood he'd shed here under my orders—and I was looking at the gray sky while praying.

I didn't stutter. Praying, not to God or to Arceus or to anything else that might have settled in my soul—I was Leaf Brannigan, and I asked no one for strength. I took my strength from inside, and I used it to turn my bones into steel, my blood to liquid nitrogen. I was praying to Fate, and it was not a direct prayer.

It was not a prayer to win. It was a prayer to save them—my Pokemon, the six that remained of my soldiers—and I prayed for them to be able to return home. The feeling that hit my stomach from inside wasn't comforting. I felt as hollow and alone as before, and I realized that I had to keep using my own strength.

I had to not only use them to win, but I had to keep them alive, or I didn't know if I'd be able to keep myself alive.

Beside me, Kashen grunted and lowered his head to my shoulder, breathing loudly. I absently stroked the smooth scales on his head, scratching around his horns and thinking. He must have been feeling nostalgic, too—it was on this route, Route 1, that he had begun his own journey. A young Charmander, a baby at heart, had met Tobias here and became powerful enough to take on the world.

And he had. He wasn't the same Charmander, much as I wasn't the same Leaf. He had scars where he hadn't, and his eyes didn't shine with love for his master. He wore his name and his kills like a badge, and he would _die_for his master-not love but bloody devotion-whether he loved her or not. Kashen had lost his innocence. I began to think I'd lost mine, back when I thought I already had.

Little did we all know.

"I can't go back yet," I said. I wasn't aware of how wistful I was until it came out of my mouth, but the desire was clear.

"Grrrow." A simple grunt of agreement.

"Then let's stop wasting time. We already know we caught Tobias here; and if we go further, we'll find Grigori's grave. I don't want to stop anywhere until I beat the eighth gym and get the last badge." I sounded hard and cold when I said this, but I'd put all of those deaths behind me and hardened my heart to the past.

Kashen didn't seem to mind. He nodded, and instead of flying the short distance from Pallet Town to Viridian City, we decided to walk—tread our old footsteps, and watch the clouds thicken and congeal into a solid iron rainstorm.

The shower didn't start until we reached the city, but I sucked Kashen back into his Poke Ball. I wasn't going to risk his life in a stupid natural occurrence like a thunderstorm.

I made the mistake of looking behind us, as I reached the door of the Pokemon Center, and I watched the rain swirl our footsteps into nothing and rinse our legacy into streams of skywater and mud.

_It's that easy, huh?_I thought. I already knew it was, though.

_The world forgets you fast._

* * *

The gym was dark—I couldn't tell if that was on purpose, or because of the power outage that had occurred in the Pokemon Center.

Rain tapped the window in ceaseless cadence, sounding like fingernails drumming to an unheard beat on a steering wheel going nowhere. I couldn't see anything but black lumps of shadow, and I had to release Kashen so the flame on his tail could guide my vision and hands.

It took awhile, before my eyes could adjust to the dark—but as I strolled down the corridors, echoing like the emptied-mind of the insane after a lobotomy, I began to make out glimmers of color from the walls.

I turned at a flash of amber, a Poke Ball gripped in one hand and Kashen at my back—but as I prepared to strike, there was nothing but shadows. I reached out tentatively and found smooth wall beneath my hand.

_What the hell is this?_I'd gone into this gym feeling cocky—overly so—but something was seeming wrong. More wrong than, perhaps, I'd already assumed.

I thought I knew who the gym leader was. Maybe I still did. But whoever it was didn't want me here.

That, I thought, was perfectly clear.

After awhile of pacing black halls, I found a door handle—dull brass protruding from the flat walls, ceilings, floors around me. I grasped it, eager to find my way out of this silent, dark hell of hallways—and when it opened, I gasped.

The room gave way to a dully lit chamber, sunken, shadows pacing like prowlers in a schoolyard. I could see a lamp tottering unsteadily on a desktop, and beneath it was an uncomfortable-looking chair.

A man was sitting in that chair, but I didn't recognize him. Not at first glance, anyway. His hair was akin to steel wool, in this shallow amber light, but even from here I could see that the black in it wasn't from the darkness of the room. He was dressed in a business suit—charcoal gray, I think—but it didn't look right on him, somehow. His frame was a tad too skeletal, too worn. And when he cut his face my way, I couldn't help but stumble backwards.

The eyes were sharp, probing. The cat's eyes, lit with a feline curiosity and, furthermore, a feline's predatory light. This cat wasn't prowling, wasn't pacing—no, he was sitting by the fireplace, worn, dreaming of younger days.

"Giovanni," I muttered. I had known, somewhere in my mind, that it would be him; how could it not? The League had been paid off, after all. Giovanni was the gym leader, and had come close to ruling our entire nation.

He would be sitting victoriously on the championship of Kanto, his thumb pressed over all of us, if it weren't for one obstruction in his path—me. And I could feel his rage from here. The anger seeped out of his pores and stained the plushly carpeted floor of the room bloody red.

Behind me, Kashen started a low growl in his throat-and I had to turn fast to stop him from making a mistake. His mouth was brimming with unshot flames. "_No_," I commanded. "Return."

He turned furious blue eyes to me, but I wasn't going to risk anything more than I already was. I recalled him, ignoring the rage Kashen had clearly expressed. He knew how badly I wanted Giovanni incinerated, but some desires are not meant to be fulfilled.

Giovanni found this amusing, I think-he didn't even blink. Instead, he allowed a span of silence to stretch between us, before he finally broke it in a smooth, almost unnoticeable way.

"Well, girl, are you happy now?" he asked, a flexible calmness in his voice. I didn't know how he could keep his facade so in tact—he looked like a dyke slowly leaking water. His teeth were clenched. I could see, from here, one large fist knotted at his suit-clad thigh, and his eyebrows, shapely and handsome, even now, were drawn together.

He wasn't hiding his anger, but I couldn't let myself be too courageous. This was, after all, a dangerous man. After all I'd done to wrong him, he was here before me, broken down, fallen, a statue knocked off of its pedestal and lying in ruins of concrete.

"Happy?" I repeated, wondering how I should handle the situation. Should I have come in, all my guns blazing, hell-bent on rubbing his nose in my glory? Or should I act as though it happened as a card of fate, a card I'd drawn with his name written in black blood?

"How else would a little heroine like yourself feel?" He leaned back. I heard ice tinkling softly against glass and swishing liquid. For the first time, I noticed the cognac in one strong hand.

"Numb." It just slipped out. I stared him in the eyes, unable to tear them away. He drank my gaze in, then spit it out with a flash of temper.

"Then why have you come here? I suppose you can see that you've ruined me. You may not be the most intelligent girl, but you've seen enough headlines and heard enough gossip to know that Rocket Enterprises is no longer." He didn't sound defeated. He only looked that way.

"_Team_Rocket," I replied with force, "is no longer."

Amusement slipped into his sharp face. The cat raised his paws, and the mouse scampered before it. "Yes, fine, Team Rocket. I suppose that's what it was, in the end, wasn't it?"

"That's what it always was," I bit out.

He chuckled. The cat's eyes were still on the mouse, and they were cold, not amused. "I'm starting to wonder just how much you know, girl."

"I know everything," I announced. I wasn't as confident as I felt, but he probably already knew that.

"Ahh. Or do you _know_half of everything, and know nothing?" The cat had let the mouse wander far enough. Play time was over.

"Blaine told me-"

"Blaine is an old fool; don't let his words be your only judgment of me," he interrupted, his silken tone harsh now. "He was a brilliant man, but his ideals got in the way, and in the end, it ruined everything I had planned."

The old man's face flashed before me—wizened by guilt, instead of true age. When he'd removed his black frames, the eyes behind them were pale, watery, haunted. The burn scars on his hands had not been inflicted by his Fire types, I'd learned.

"Blaine had a conscience, which, of course, you didn't like much," I retorted.

"A conscience, is that what we're choosing to call it?" He set his drink down onto the desktop beside him. It went down a little too hard, and amber liquid rose up and out of it, slinking down the sides of the glass.

"What else?"

"Blaine was perfectly fine with what we were doing on Cinnabar." He fixed his eyes on me, points of a dagger that pricked around my eyes and threatened to remove them. "He knew we were playing God, and he loved it. There is little a scientist won't do to change what he thinks is the world, when it is, in fact, life itself."

His philosophy spun around my head, eating into my membrane. What he was saying made sense, but... how could I trust it? I couldn't, I knew. I couldn't.

Giovanni continued, perfectly guileless, "My team provided him with what he needed to create-"

"Mew," I interjected suddenly. The image I'd seen in one of the journals—the sketch—flashed before my mind, a slinky, small creature with a feline head and long, lashing tail. A Pokemon with blood of the ancient earth in its veins, hunted into extinction by mankind, told to have created all of the creatures of the world with little more than its own blood, water from the ocean, coals from the sun's fire, and leaves from the ancient oaks. Mew.

He looked at me appraisingly. "We never actually captured Mew."

"What?" I blinked. "Then what-"

"I myself retrieved the DNA. The Pokemon, rumored to be hidden in the jungles, came before me. I thought I could capture it, but it came to drive us away." He looked toward the ceiling, lost in his memory. "I used my own Pokemon to chase it, but it destroyed them without flinching. So I ordered one of my men to shoot it."

"You—you what?" My hand rose to my mouth. Was there no limit to the horrors of a man who would do anything to get what he wanted? Even worse, who could do anything? I imagined the creature who had spawned legends, beautiful, gentle, wishing to protect it and its home from the intruders. I imagined it loftily floating in the air, a pink stain on the night sky and against the verdant jungle, flinging psychic energy at Giovanni's obedient Pokemon.

Then I imagined its flight—and I saw the young Giovanni's expression tighten. Nobody withheld what he wanted. Nobody denied him. He nodded to the sniper that was crouched in a damp green crevice, not too far away from the scene, and-

"It wasn't killed," he sighed. "I remember the scream it made, and I remember the blood being spilled onto the rain forest floor, and then it flashed away, quick as a bolt of lightning. None of us have seen it since."

"Where did you shoot it?" I asked harshly, but my voice was quiet with shock.

"My man—Benson, he was a good sniper—aimed for the chest or stomach, but I don't think it actually hit it there. It moved so fast that it was hard to tell where the bullet actually hit." He straightened in his chair, the thoughtful look on his face gone. He was back in the present. "The point is, we had Mew's blood, and we created an entire new species of Pokemon with it. A Pokemon designed to have human-like intelligence, but Pokemon-like obedience. Powerful as Mew—no, _more__ powerful_!—and all mine."

He had the look of a child, proud of the toy no one else could afford to have. It made my stomach flip to see such a corruption of innocence in a grown man, a handsome and intelligent man.

"But it escaped," I said pointedly. "You couldn't control what you'd ordered to be created. You were useless-"

"It wasn't my fault," he roared. I stepped back, startled—the cat had lost its calm, the eternal calm that earned it so many meals and friends. Now it showed its teeth like needles, the hackles on its neck like hedgehog spikes, the claws that scaled any wall or prison. It showed the scrawny beast it'd been in the alleys before it learned to survive and survive well. I didn't want to see the person Giovanni had become—old and defeated, but unwilling to admit it to himself—and I certainly didn't want to see the man he'd been before all of this. Young, bitter, running from something that we all end up running from sooner or later—his past and his expectations.

He went on, voice gaining fire, gaining control. "Those_ idiots_ allowed the project to wander about freely. They taught it to speak, to read, to feel. If I had known—if I had been there—I would have kept it under lock and key. I would have taught it to fight, to obey, to know its place in life. But those stupid men—they treated it like a child. It _wasn't_a child!" He was throwing all of his unkempt, unseen rage at me—a placeholder for the scientists who ruined his experiment.

"It wasn't a child," I agreed mildly. "But it was a living thing. Something without any family or friends or hopes. A living thing that didn't have a past, or a future, or anything tangible."

"It was a _weapon_! It wouldn't have existed if it weren't for me!" His dark eyes flamed. "I don't want to rehash all of this! I lost the creature, and I was glad that it destroyed that lab! I was glad it killed those idiotic scientists! I felt so proud. Even though I had failed as Mewtwo's master, he had all of the strength I had wanted him to have, and he utilized it perfectly. Vengeance."

The way he said the word—vengeance—it made my skin crawl.

That was what he was thinking of now, wasn't it?

Vengeance. Revenge. Justice. The words led to misconceptions and lies that we told ourselves. Revenge wasn't justice. A single man or woman couldn't decide what justice was. Hadn't I learned that the hard way?

But Giovanni hadn't learned that, hard way or no. I knew he'd learned a lot of things, things I'd learned, things I'd never had to, but he hadn't learned that.

And I was no longer a girl who ruined all he was—I was an empty canvas, a faceless enemy, for all of the things that had gone wrong or amiss in his long, hard life.

"So, you came to challenge me for the last badge. Fine." He smiled slowly, and he stood. He'd grown old after Silph, his age had caught up to him and his perfectionist coif had gone to waste. And the alley cat beneath was out now. The fur was matted, the rage was clear. I had to spar with those claws—claws that had been sheathed for years.

"Do you accept my challenge—the last challenge, I should think—Giovanni?" I asked, cool as a cucumber on a summer's eve. Or so I hoped.

"I do. Let it be known that this is an official League match for the Earthbadge." He nodded, a clear gesture for me to select my first Pokemon.

I knew Giovanni's Pokemon—most of them, anyway—and knew who would do well in this gym. I selected my Poke Ball, threw it onto the field. The room's darkness was lit up briefly as Frederick the Graveler was chosen. As soon as he recognized the man standing before him—a man we'd fought recently, in the crumbles of the Silph tower—Frederick's stance grew tense.

Giovanni smirked and tossed a Poke Ball himself. Rhyhorn stood before us, stone hide looking rougher and more chipped than it had the last time we'd battled. I thought I had something to do with that, and Frederick, of course.

"Frederick, use Earthquake!"

Giovanni narrowed his eyes. "Rhyhorn, Earthquake."

_What__?_I looked at the other Rock and Ground type, and just as Frederick drove all four of his fists into the floor, sending ripples of energy Rhyhorn's direction, the opponent leapt onto the ground and drove his own wave our way.

Rhyhorn was a higher level... I watched helplessly as the waves of power collided, and both were flung backwards, to the feet of their respective trainers. I knelt before Frederick, tears threatening my burning eyes, but I was relieved to see that he had heaved himself to his feet, shakily. He had cracks in his own exterior, and I decided that it had been foolish to use a Rock and Ground type against a Ground gym leader.

"I'm sorry, Frederick. Stupid me. Return." I recalled him, just as the opposing Rhyhorn shakily got to his own feet. Giovanni watched, expressionless, as CeeCee appeared on the field.

"Rock Blast, Rhyhorn."

"CeeCee, you're quicker! Surf!" I shot out. Rock Blast would have killed CeeCee for sure—but, as I'd thought, the ivory Water type released a powerful gush of water that flooded the floor of the gym and pounded Rhyhorn into the ground, worn down at last.

Giovanni recalled it. "Nidoqueen."

A Pokemon I knew well appeared, but it had none of Lyrica's friendly, smiling warmth. It looked about as the Rhyhorn had—dull and tired. I wondered how much Giovanni had trained these Pokemon recently—they were certainly much stronger than they'd been at Silph.

"CeeCee, Surf."

"Nidoqueen, Double Kick."

_Shit._CeeCee's gush of water found the Nidoqueen, but instead of collapsing as the dirt was washed from her venomous flesh, she leapt at him. Her massive feet were driven into his ribs once, twice! Then she flew back, panting and soaked, on one knee.

CeeCee was damaged—he let out a shrill bark of pain—but he didn't collapse or fall over, as I'd feared. He merely shot another Surf attack from his mouth, letting it wash the rest of Nidoqueen away.

As Giovanni recalled his fallen Ground type, I applied a Potion to CeeCee, who was looking at me warily. "Don't worry, boy—you've got this. I don't think any of the rest of his Pokemon will be a problem for you."

The next Pokemon, however, was perhaps more of a problem. Towering over my little seal was a Pokemon similar to Nidoqueen, but with dark bruise-colored scales and spines instead. From his head protruded a sword-like horn, and behind him trailed a thick, muscular tail. Nidoking looked far more fearsome than the gentler Nidoqueen.

"CeeCee, Aurora Beam!" I commanded, just as Giovanni commanded a Double Kick from his Nidoking.

"Dewgong," CeeCee cried as he spun around the Double Kick, sliding on his slick belly and propelling himself beneath Nidoking's thick legs. Once behind the foe, he shot a beautiful beam of aurora, striking the Nidoking like broken glass in an alleyway. It brought its weaker Special Defense down immediately, but it wasn't defeated yet.

It was, however, beginning to freeze. The crystals on its back stretched over the rest of its purple spines, and as it roared its outrage and turned to clobber CeeCee, it remained suspended over him threateningly.

I smiled, not believing my good luck. "CeeCee, Surf! Finish it!"

As the water pulsed over him, the Nidoking collapsed, ice breaking painfully around his tough skin. Giovanni's teeth were clenched, I could tell.

"Dugtrio."

I started painfully to see the replication of Leroy—a Pokemon I hadn't seen since Leroy's death, actually—but commanded a single Surf to wash it asunder.

Giovanni's sole Poke Ball remained untouched. I expected Kangaskahn, but instead a second Rhyhorn appeared, bigger, tougher—and I realized that this was the one I'd fought at Silph and in Celadon. The chipped skin from the other Rhyhorn hadn't come from me...

It'd come from Giovanni himself, hadn't it?

_If I had known—if I had been there—I would have kept it under lock and key. I would have taught it to fight, to obey, to know its place in life. But those idiots—they treated it like a child. It wasn't a child!_

I blanched visibly, and Giovanni noticed. He called out, "Frightened now, are you?"

"No," I lied. I wasn't afraid of losing to this Rhyhorn—I was afraid of a man like him.

I was afraid of something else, too, something I couldn't say aloud. Namely, I was afraid of the parts of me that resembled him.

His next command snapped me back to attention, though, and I shook the cobwebs away from my mind.

"Rock Blast, Rhyhorn!"

This time, CeeCee couldn't outspeed the level 50 Pokemon. It pounded him with boulders that hit thrice—once in the shoulder, two in the ribs. I began to suspect a rib or two had been broken in this rough match, for CeeCee was dragging himself a little oddly.

_I would have taught it to fight, to obey..._

"Return, CeeCee," I heard myself say—the Poke Ball had found its way in my hand. Surprised, he glanced at me over his sleek shoulder, just as he was returned to safety. I wasn't risking it.

"Lyrica."

She appeared on the field, a look of calm gracing her peach maw and cyan face. I knew it would be a close battle—Earthquake could take her out in one hit, but...

"Lyrica—Superpower!"

"Rhyhorn, Earthquake!"

She jumped, but the earth cracked and quaked beneath her, and slammed down hard. The Rhyhorn roared in rage and agony, but Lyrica wasn't finished. She picked the Rock type up—I could see the pulse of her muscles in both arms, as they brimmed with power—and she slammed it down into the floor, issuing a crack from either the Rhyhorn or the floor.

It was over.

I had won.

And I could see, from across the torn battlefield of his little dark gym, that Giovanni had known I would. The blow was the final one—he turned away, hiding his hurt, shielding the little pride he had left from my guessing gaze.

I had eight badges—but furthermore, I'd defeated a man who was as dangerous as he was skilled.

I was a hero in all but name.

But it scared me to think so.


	32. When You Asked if I Believed

**Locke ****and ****Key: **_A __Nuzlocke __Story_

**A/N: **Sorry, this took _forever_ to get out. But, not far to go. :)  
Special thanks, as always, to **FirebirdXoXo**, for being the best editor ever.

* * *

And no matter what we both had to go through  
I just can't, I can't hold on  
When you asked if I believed it, I told you  
Straight to facts  
(Straight to facts)  
Made me strong  
(Made strong)  
But I can't feel a thing than I used to  
And I can't, I can't hold on

All That Remains, "Hold On" _; For We Are Many_

* * *

"So," Green drawled, flicking a rock over the steep pool below our feet, "I guess you're leaving pretty soon."

I shrugged. It was a brisk, nipping noon, but sunny and fairly nice. I let my bare legs dangle over the edge, toes skimming the top of the cold water. "I'm thinking about going next week."

"Well," he said, arrogance bubbling in his voice, rising to the surface to boil, "I'm leaving tomorrow."

"What?" I jerked my legs up, just as a curious Magikarp rose to the surface, mouth gaping. My eyes rose from the fish to his, startled by the confidence that shone in their blue depths. "_Tomorrow?_ Are you out of your fucking _mind_?"

"Tch. I can handle it, sweetheart." His voice didn't sound as superficially arrogant as it once did. It just sounded faintly reassured, calmly prepared. He met my incredulous look coolly. "I beat Giovanni before you did, remember? And it's been the required five days. I've just been stuck around here, training my ass off, hoping I'd make it before you... and I have."

The five days he spoke of had passed since he last beat Giovanni. I still had another day before I could even consider challenging the Elite Four. Basically, the League required every trainer who managed to obtain Kanto's eight badges (or Johto's, if and when they were participating) to wait five days before they could challenge the Indigo Plateau.

In my opinion, five days wasn't nearly enough preparation.

"But... Green... we've been battling each other since the beginning. I'm pretty sure that neither of us are ready."

It was true. The two of us had had a practice match earlier that day. He'd given me trouble—too much trouble, to be honest. But in the end, my team had been just enough to shove his to the ground. However, as we drew away from the battlefield, I noticed my Pokemon's exhaustion—and it seemed to prove to me that I wasn't even close to being prepared.

Green had been somewhat irritated, but it hardly showed. He knew I had some type advantages; each member of the Elite Four used one type, and one type only.

"Look, if I'm not ready, Victory Road will help me take care of that. Anyways, why should you care if I'm ready? I'm competition," he replied coolly.

It was true. He was competition—my only competition, I supposed—but he had become something more, too. The childish exterior of egotistical pride had worn away, revealing something rougher underneath. Something with layers, with surface, with texture and depth and—oh, hell, I began to realize that he was a _person_.

A friend.

And even though I didn't want to lose—to him, or to anyone else—I hurt at the thought of the Elite Four bringing him to his knees.

I agreed, "Victory Road is supposedly tough enough to prepare us all for what's ahead."

"Then why wait a week? Just take the time off that they make you and go." He rolled his eyes towards me. "If I'm ready, then you're ready, Leaf."

"I guess." I wasn't so sure, but his argument was compelling. I liked to think of myself as Champion material—who didn't?

I was so close to my goal—the one I'd started out with when leaving Pallet Town—that I could taste it, the sweetness of victory, clots of gore staining my armor and blade as I returned home a knight.

But I didn't want to risk tasting failure instead.

"Well." He stood, brushing dust and stray pieces of grass from his jeans. "I'm going to go home and get myself ready for Victory Road. You should, too."

With that, he selected a worn Poke Ball and released his Pidgeot. The bird cooed softly-a whirring, loving sound-in his ear as he straddled its neck and shoulders. The bird regarded me with bland hostility as he did so, its head lifted haughtily as the wind played with strands of scarlet and gold hair.

_It __even __acts __like __Green,_I thought, smiling a little. He noticed and smirked, running a hand along the bird's pale feathers. "Good luck, Leaf. I better damn well see you there."

"Oh, trust me, kid, you will," I said, tough as I could manage. I felt hollow inside, though—sad. Like all of this was ending, the good and the bad, and I could never have anything like it again.

"Good." He brought his knees into the Pidgeot's side gently, and it took off with force.

I watched them go back—the short flight from Viridian to Pallet Town—and then I took out my own Poke Balls, looking at them speculatively.

"Guess I should train," I murmured.

I tossed all six of them into the air—a motley arrangement of Poke Balls, Great Balls, a Safari Ball and an Ultra Ball. My team, equally mismatched, stood around me, strong personalities flaring in my face. Stubborn, impatient Kashen; an unusually subdued Xander; a questioning, good-natured Flitz; a solemn Frederick; Lyrica, smiling cheerfully in my direction, and CeeCee, a little apart from the others and with puppy-like love in his pale face.

"Are you guys all ready?" I asked, and all six made various roars of approval.

At least, I hoped they were—because it was going to be a _long_ hike.

* * *

West of Viridian City—a place where new trainers could often find Pokemon such as Spearow, Mankey, or Nidoran, but where I'd found a duplicate Rattata—was a short, scenic path that led me to the gates of the Indigo Plateau.

I reached out with one hand, touching the little sign out front. The sidewalks were nicely manicured, but the sign was rugged, old, and weathered—somehow appropriate, I thought.

_Trainers, be prepared. The Pokemon League lies ahead._

Someone had written something under it in red Sharpie. _Everything__happens__for__a__reason._

Everything happens for a reason.

I snorted, but was touched. Maybe it had been written by a loser who'd glimpsed hope. Maybe it was, instead, written by someone who'd won and had something to believe in.

I was going to walk out of the Pokemon League today, I knew that. Whether I did it alone or with my team was something I couldn't foresee.

I steeled myself.

I walked inside, not allowing myself to walk back.

* * *

The road to Victory Road was probably longer than the trainer-ridden cave itself. I'd heard stories of the guards at the gates, but they were far more rigorous than I'd imagined.

I was stopped a total of eight times, frisked over for weapons or anything other than items or Pokemon, then asked to see the badge in question.

I had all eight of them pressed into a black velvet case—a case Brock had given to me, when I was young and trying to keep up with Green. They glittered faintly under the heavy security lights, and I was surprised to feel the waves of nostalgia that rocked against me as each one was examined for validity.

The Boulderbadge. Silver, smooth, with textures made to feel like a stone carved from the depths of a limestone cave. Kashen's fiery breath, quick claws, and near-demise beneath a pile of boulders. I had felt so proud of him—and of myself—after winning that badge.

The Cascadebadge—my second gym victory. My memory of that battle was diluted. What I remembered instead were the deaths that circled my impending match. Team Rocket and fate had taken several of my teammates away from me—good and weak teammates alike—and stolen something confident in me. In the end, it was Tobias and Xander who'd brought me that badge.

Ahh, Tobias. The sole hero of the Vermilion gym match. When the guard flicked his eyes over the Thunderbadge, I couldn't help but wince. Blood and linoleum; laughter and insanity; Tobias and Raichu; Surge and me. Parallels. I'd seen quite a few Pokemon die, but Tobias was the first Pokemon I'd ever captured. The first Pokemon whose respect I'd had to earn. And I'd let him die at the hands of an insane gym leader, a gym leader who'd lost his own compassion in the throes of a war.

I'd had a few sleepless nights over Tobias' death. A few snatches of a dream in which Hyper Fang and Shock Wave collided in an endless loop of certain demise. But mostly, I didn't think about it all.

The Rainbowbadge—a fairly easy victory. Kashen and Xander were starring players in a gym of grass types. Erika's request was what came to mind most readily—her request to infiltrate the Rocket's base and clear away as many of the grunts as I could. In the end, I'd uprooted Giovanni and followed them to Lavender Town and, eventually, Silph.

There, from a cocoon of ash, Charizard had risen from my starter's body.

Next was the Soulbadge—a victory shared by Xander, Frederick, and Lyrica—and the honor of a leader like Koga. I felt a respect for him, even now, untouched by Giovanni's corruption. Faintly, I also remembered rain and the smell of damp earth, and the memory of two dead Marowaks.

The Volcanobadge had been an easy win, as well. The guard reached out to touch the spiky red stone tentatively—making sure it wasn't forged, I'm sure—and I thought of the broken Blaine, confessing his sins to me. The universal curse of Mewtwo was humanity's sin. I knew that now.

My dragon, my Kashen, had almost fallen victim to fate—destiny?—in the next gym. Sabrina. She'd foreseen his demise at the palms of her Psychic armada, but after Silph Co.'s destruction, we were both ready for her cowardice. The Marshbadge—an odd name, really, for a Psychic gym's emblem—was ours, regardless of future sight.

The guard nodded me on after examining the Earthbadge—my final triumph, the badge that not only determined the end of my quest, but also the end of Team Rocket as a whole—and I stared before the doors that would take me north.

Victory Road would take me to the end.


	33. Vs Lorelei

**Locke and Key: **_A Nuzlocke Story_

__**A/N:** Special thanks, as always, to **FirebirdXoX**. :D  
As a side note, to those of you interested, check out the poll on my profile page. If you're not interested, then don't bother.

* * *

"Selfdestruct on her, Graveler!"

The trainer's voice echoed, as all loud noises did within the cave. His Graveler steeled itself as his master backed away, covering his face to prepare for the shrapnel.

_Why?_ I thought later. _Why would anyone command their Pokemon to destroy themselves? To win a battle? How is that worth it?_

I couldn't hear what I screamed; right as my mouth fell open, the Graveler's insides shone white, and then a dark burning red. Fire burst from his middle, and pieces of heavy stone blitzed around his shattered core. I threw myself to the floor, tasting blood where I'd bit my tongue and dirt from the cave. A chunk of the trainer's Pokemon slapped against my jean-clad thigh, and another small piece hit my cheekbone.

I wasn't feeling any pain, though. I peered through the immediate cloud of smoke and dust, holding my breath.

_No,_ I remember thinking. _Please. We didn't come this far just to quit here. You didn't come all this way for nothing. I didn't bring you here to die in a dark cave, minutes from the exit._

The dust settled. I saw a lump on the floor—not Graveler's trainer, unfortunately. The distant sunlight from the cave's exit outlined her blue-gray scales in pale yellow.

"Lyrica," I choked. Even that echoed. I crawled over to where she was laying, eyes stinging with grit and tears. "No, no, damn it. It can't end like this. It _can't_."

"I'm sorry, trainer," the other guy said.

"You're… _sorry_? For killing my Pokemon? My _friend_?" I pounded my fist against my thigh, adding to the collection of bruises. "My god, you killed _your own Pokemon_just to hurt me!"

"You don't understand," he said. His face was blurry. I could feel tears on my cheeks. "I… took the challenge. The rest are all dead. He deserved to go in battle. And now you know. You know what's waiting for you."

He might've been crying too.

_He was crazy,_ I thought later. _He was delirious from grief and from losing. The Challenge made a fool of him, as it has many. Even me._

I tried to rub grime from my face and ended up getting some in my eyes. They stung, but I barely noticed. I reached out to Lyrica, my sweet Nidoqueen, felt her dry scales, ran my hand over her arms, thick with muscle.

_If you were still in the Safari Zone, you'd be a little Nidorina. You'd be alive. Safe._

I was openly sobbing now, forgetting about the other trainer, the one who'd commanded his Graveler to explode. My dreams were crashing around my feet. My Nidoqueen was dead…

_"Nalll…"_came a weak cough. The arm I was gripping shifted, pale claws making rivulets in the soft dirt floor. An eye opened, the iris a lively brown that found my face and froze there.

"Lyrica!" My heart stopped. "My god, you survived. Oh, you're alive!"

This hadn't ever happened. When a Pokemon slumped in the dirt, when they were stiff and still with dust in the air and closed eyes, they never opened a slitted eye and cried out to me.

I knelt over Lyrica, thanking whatever gods there could be for her life.

"We're almost out, baby," I sobbed. "We made it."

Her pale mouth creased in a smile. _"Nal?"_

"Yes," I said heedlessly. "We're all okay. We're all alive."

The other trainer-the one who had commanded his last Pokemon to die for him-had disappeared.

Better trainers than I had lost Pokemon in Victory Road—some had lost _all_of their Pokemon there.

But I held Lyrica's head in my arms and sprayed her with potions until she could walk. The dark gathered around us like wings, but we strode through them anyways. Daylight faded and dusk hit our faces in a musky breath as soon as we exited the cave.

There was a massive stadium sprawling before us, and a small, demure entrance with a healing center and market leading to it.

The stadium was in hibernation, and the stars were bright, as nothing else competed with the night sky this far away from the civilized world of Kanto.

"We made it," I whispered, shocked into smiling. Lyrica loomed beside me, alive and pulsing with unspilled blood and fighting spirit. My other five Pokemon squirmed in their Balls, begging for battle.

I had quit the cigarettes cold. My lungs had already improved, and I could taste the night air almost as I had tasted death and dirt hours before. I was bruised and dirty, and my hair needed to be washed and brushed, but we were alive and we were prepared—as much as we would ever be, anyways.

It was time.

* * *

Because Kanto and Johto share an Elite Four, we get far more challengers than Hoenn, Sinnoh, or Unova, but, ironically, far fewer champions.

Lance had reigned as champion for a decade or so—his dragons were tough to beat. So it was him I expected at the end, though as I checked in with the receptionist, I was informed otherwise.

"Can you repeat that?" I asked dubiously.

"Green Oak," she answered. "Weird name, I know, but I've heard that he's a great trainer and a skilled battler. He must be, to defeat Lance."

_Green is the champion!_ I couldn't believe it. The boy I'd seen around school, bragging of touchdowns and cheerleaders with equal fervor, the boy I'd gotten my starter Pokemon with, the boy I'd hated fervently, the boy who'd helped me save Silph Co… the boy who was my biggest rival and my only remaining human friend… _he_was the champion.

I remembered my first victory as well as I remembered my recent ones. I remembered his Squirtle panting on the floor, remembered young Kashen's little claws shining red under Oak's lights. I remembered striking his Pidgeotto down even as I envied its wings; I remembered him kneeling beside his Raticate's grave.

Green-that _boy_-was my final obstacle.

"I can beat him," I said. The receptionist only smiled.

"We'll see, dear. Well, I've run the serial number on your trainer card and I've checked them on your Pokemon, and you're all good to go. If you want to go through the doors and defeat Lorelei, you will. The battles are all recorded for television—if you don't want to be on live TV, you can sign this waiver…"

"I'm fine," I said. I wanted everyone back home to see me kick Green's ass. Especially my old stoner friends. _If they're not too high to enjoy it._

"Very well then." She nodded to the heavy doors behind us. "Go on ahead. Lorelei has been informed that you're coming."

I took a deep breath, then went through the doors.

* * *

Lorelei's field consisted of a long hall filled with water. There was a walkway around the pool that connected to two opposing platforms—one for the challenger to stand on, and one for her. For Pokemon that couldn't swim, three round pillars protruded from the water in a row.

Before she emerged, I knelt to touch the water. Just as I'd expected, it was ice cold.

"Yes, I keep my water as cold as it is around the Icefall Caves on Floe Island," came a clipped, educated female voice. I looked up as she entered, foolishly impressed on sight. She looked a bit like a college professor, with a button-down blouse, pencil skirt, tidy heels, and small glasses. Her red hair was tied behind her, and her smile sliced like a knife.

She did _not_look like a member of the Kanto Elite Four, but I digress. I stood up, shaking the water from my hand.

"So. You're Lorelei," I said. I didn't really know what else to say. I'd met gym leaders, even bested them, but Lorelei was more of a celebrity than all of them put together. She was on TV all the time, and she battled with cool finesse—quite unlike myself.

"I am. Or so I hear," she said humorously. "I hear you're called Leaf. I'm pleased to make your acquaintance."

"Likewise." I was starting to wonder if we'd ever start this battle.

"I hear you're from Kanto, yes? Right by the ocean." The smile never left her face, and her veiled eyes never left mine.

"Yeah. I never went to the ocean much." I did go for parties, but you can get drunk in someone's basement as easily as you can on the shoreline, and it's less conspicuous. "Look, can we just…"

"Of course. You must be eager to lose. Well, challenger, this water is for the use of any Pokemon who can use it. Drowning is not unheard of, so your Pokemon who can't swim will want to use the platforms." She nodded to the protruding circles. "If you leave your own platform before the match is over, you forfeit. Agreed?"

"Agreed," I said, taking a Poke Ball from my belt.

"Then let us commence."

Without another word, she tossed her own Poke Ball into the air. A familiar white seal graced the waters, a horn sprouting from its doglike head. "Dewgong," she said gracefully.

"Flitz, go!"

I carefully aimed the Ball so that the Electrode could sit on the first platform. He was smiling tensely, eyes scanning the water as Dewgong swam.

"Dewgong, Hail."

"Flitz, Thunder!"

Flitz, being much faster, crackled with electricity before a massive bolt crashed from the ceiling. It stirred the water and found the Dewgong, resulting in an immediate knockout.

Lorelei didn't look impressed. "Very well. Jynx, go." This time, the thing that emerged from her Ball stood upon a platform. It had a dark face, prominent lips, and flowing blonde hair that decorated a heart-shaped bosom. Jynx was easily the strangest looking Pokemon I'd ever seen.

"Flitz, return. Kashen, go!"

Regardless, I knew it was an Ice-type.

Kashen graced the platform, stretching his green-leathered wings upon release. He hadn't gotten much action in awhile, and I knew he was eager to brawl.

"Jynx, Attract."

"Kashen, Flamethrower!"

Kashen spread his legs and fired a hot stream of flames into Jynx's approaching face. The strange-looking nymph skipped onto the middle platform, and then onto Kashen's, hearts flying from her skirts. Even through the damaging fire, she managed to attract him.

"Shit," I muttered. He was infatuated; he watched her dimly, blue eyes hazed from lust. "Okay, Kashen, come on, snap out of it! Let's kill her ugly ass and move on. Flamethrower again!"

The Charizard slowly followed Jynx's deft movements around him, but this turn he was infatuated into numbness. Frustrated, I watched as the Ice-type raised a fist covered in frost and punched him across the face.

"Kashen, come on!"

"Jynx, use Lovely Kiss!"

I watched in horror as Jynx licked her repulsively huge lips and leaned forward to kiss Kashen on his snout. Just before her lips grazed him, his limbs shot up, claws latching onto her sides and pinning her own limbs. He looked her in the face, parted his jaws, and shot a stream of fire directly at her.

Like an icicle reduced to a puddle of lukewarm water, Jynx fell limply to the platform.

"Good for you, Kashen," I called, overjoyed. "She wasn't your type, anyways."

Lorelei pushed up her glasses. "I see. Cloyster!"

I knew from the Elite Four marathons I'd watched as a girl that Cloyster was Lorelei's lowest level and placeholder Pokemon. I nodded to Kashen as the purple bivalve hit the water, ominous black face half-hidden and peering at us from the depths.

"Wait 'til it comes up to attack," I said. Kashen nodded, eyes scanning the water impatiently.

Lorelei smirked. "Dive, Cloyster."

It vanished without so much as a ripple, even its shadow hidden in the cold depths. _Dive_? I knew it was a common sport to go diving for treasure in Hoenn, but it was rare in Kanto to find a Pokemon who knew the move.

I didn't really know how it worked, so I decided to be safe.

"Kashen, Fly," I called, wearily searching the icewater for Cloyster's shadow. I saw Lorelei's scowl and knew I'd chosen wisely, however; Kashen lifted into the air on heavy wings, just as Cloyster leapt from the water and landed on the platform.

Charizard and Cloyster met in a tangle of spikes and claws as he hit it from above; the aerial attack did little, as Lorelei's placeholder was half Ice-type and had a thick, spiny shell protecting it.

"Kashen," I called, knowing he was faster, "Flamethrower!"

He grabbed the bivalve in his claws, even as it struggled to shut. Cloyster's black, shadowy face went darker in alarm as Kashen shot fire into it.

Lorelei frowned. She wasn't so pretty or put-together when she frowned.

"Lapras."

A massive blue lake monster-type creature filled the water. The Lapras had daintily curling ears, a small horn, a massive shell on its back, and big doe eyes. Water beaded luxuriously from its silky blue skin.

I knew Lapras had a dual typing of Ice and Water.

Imagine.

"Kashen, take a rest! Flitz, you're up again!"

As my Electrode spun onto the platform, Lapras had opened its mouth. A swirl of frosted energy darted from its jaws—Ice Beam. It hit Flitz square in his red and white center, and he flew backwards, barely keeping himself from the water.

"Damn it." I rummaged in my pack for a Full Restore, found one, and spritzed him with it. Even from the required distance, it managed to fully heal him. "Now, Flitz, use Thunder!" I knew Thunder was a risky move, since it rarely hit its target, but Spark required physical contact, and I wasn't sure if Flitz could float. _He certainly can't swim._

We were in luck; just as Lapras arched its graceful neck and prepared to shoot a beam, Flitz's white lightning crashed on top of it. It shuddered violently, wreathed in electricity, and then sank into the water as a dancer sinks to the stage floor.

Lorelei recalled her Lapras. She glared at me, fuming, her red ponytail tossing behind her. "You think you're clever, challenger, but even if you do defeat me, you won't last against Bruno and the rest. You're too reckless. You have none of the poise it takes to become champion."

"Poise?" I asked, as her last Pokemon—a higher-leveled Dewgong—appeared in the water. "Poise, like you? I did say I wanted to win—not lose. Flitz, finish it! Thunder!"

The sleek white seal darted forward, water rippling around and behind it. It leapt into the air for a physical move as Flitz spun, grinning. Thunder had struck. Lightning seared the air, and I could hear the crackle of static as it smoked Dewgong back into the icewater.

Victory lit my heart up. I wanted to run to Flitz, to hug him close, but I didn't want my hair to afro up on camera.

Lorelei recalled her Dewgong, frowning. "Very well. Officially, challenger Leaf has defeated Elite Four member Lorelei. You may take the walkway and go beyond these doors to fight Bruno." She turned from me—and from the camera. "Good luck."

"That didn't sound sincere," I said, smiling despite myself. "I'll let it slide, though. Flitz, return! You did great, buddy, and now you need to rest up." His small black eyes shone with pride as his Ball eclipsed him.

I strode around the pool of water and the platforms to reach the heavy oak doors behind Lorelei. I gave her one last look before I walked through the doors, but she avoided my gaze. _Sore loser,_ I thought. _Like all gym leaders and celebrities._

The smile faded as I heaved the doors open. The corridor was dark, dimly lit by caged light bulbs—somewhat like a prison. There was a staircase at the end.

_Bruno,_ I thought. Fighting and Rock-types. _Bring it._


	34. Vs Bruno

**Locke and Key: **_A Nuzlocke Story_

**A/N:** Firebird, I still love you.  
The rest of you - thanks for reading. :3  
And don't forget my poll, to those who even _want_ me to write another Nuzlocke~ xD

* * *

Maybe I should've been worried about Bruno, but after the sweep I'd done on Lorelei's team, the nervous gnawing in my belly had vanished.

I knew who I'd be using for the strong, quiet Bruno.

As I entered the room, I noted that it was far less stylized than Lorelei's had been. Bruno's arena was just like any other official League-match stadium, though the floor was soft dirt.

There were two platforms at opposing ends of the arena—one for me and one for him. He stood on his, regarding me with cool brown eyes. He looked as he always did—well-muscled and hard-bodied, with loose-fitting pants and no shirt.

"Welcome, challenger," he said in a booming voice. I took my place opposite him, aware of the cameras in the corners.

"Hello, Bruno," I responded lightly.

"I see you've beaten Lorelei. Congratulations, but the same thing will not happen here." He chose a Poke Ball. "Are you prepared to battle?"

"Yes." I was thankful for his stoic nature. I wouldn't have to sit through a bunch of talking. "Let's get this over with."

"Very well." He threw a Poke Ball onto the field. It released Onix, a stone-carved serpent I'd seen many times before.

"CeeCee, go!" My Dewgong shifted uncomfortably in the dirt. I could see brown smearing his belly from my platform. "Don't pay it any mind, CeeCee. Use Surf!"

He rose up, water gurgling beneath him, and slammed into the Onix in a powerful tidal wave. The arena floor turned into a muddy mess as Onix went down, stone skin washed clean of its Ground-type dust.

"Return, Onix." He looked thoughtful. "Hitmonlee, go." A semi-human shaped Fighting type stood where Onix had fallen, its legs making up its entire height. It regarded CeeCee with black eyes.

_Hmm. So much for CeeCee. _Being half Ice-type, CeeCee was vulnerable to the Fighting-type's lanky kicks. I recalled him and threw out Xander's Poke Ball.

My Golbat hadn't seen the light of day in some time, being weak to most of the Pokemon in Victory Road's stretch of cave. Upon release, he fanned his wings, dangling above the ruined swamp of Bruno's arena.

"Hitmonlee," Bruno said in a flat voice, "Mega Kick."

"Xander, use—"

Hitmonlee was _much_faster. He became a taupe blur, dancing across the mud. One long leg lifted, its clawed foot white with power, and he delivered it into Xander's chest with deadly accuracy.

I hadn't counted on him knowing a Normal move.

Xander was forced backwards from the blow, hitting the side of my platform and sliding down into the mud.

"Hold on, babe," I called, slinging my back to the ground. "We've got this." I sprayed him heavily with the Hyper Potion, getting as close as I could, and watched with relief as he shook off the pain and rose. Even in flight, he was smeared with mud.

"Hitmonlee, Mega Kick again." Bruno leaned forward, arms crossed against his muscled chest and stomach.

"Xander, use Aerial Ace!"

As Hitmonlee charged again, Xander moved to the side, using one clipped wing to slice against the Fighting-type's flank. His glowing foot pounded the air behind Xander's wingspan, and blood fell in droplets from his battered side.

He dropped to one knee, eyes closed in fading consciousness.

"Come back, Hitmonlee. Hitmonchan, it's your turn!"

Another humanshaped Pokemon took his fallen brother's place; this one was shorter, with gloved fists and thin legs. I nodded to Xander, who chopped forward, preparing another Aerial Ace.

"Hitmonchan, evade the attack," Bruno said, perhaps forgetting Aerial Ace's secondary effect—it _never _missed. However, being a bit sturdier than his headstrong brother, Hitmonchan endured the blow, panting.

"Fine. Rock Tomb."

I felt something cold run down my back. "Xander, evade!"

He tried, darting first forward and then to the right, but the stones fell all across his zigzagging path, and one hit him on his wing, pinning him face-first into the thick muddy floor. He jerked wildly, using the other to beat uselessly at the air, but it was no good.

Hitmonchan raised a glowing fist for the last attack.

"No!" I cried, fumbling for Xander's Poke Ball. "I recall you! Now!"

Luckily, he disappeared in a weak beam of red, not dead, only beaten. I tossed an older Ball in his place. "Kashen!"

My massive Fire-type emerged, feet splayed in the mud. Hitmonchan's glowing fist darted forward, and Kashen caught it with both claws, flames tumbling from his closed jaws.

"Finish him!" I called.

Kashen obliged, using Flamethrower. Hitmonchan stumbled backwards, then collapsed on the ruined floor.

Bruno recalled him. "Onix, attack!"

I cursed, then withdrew Kashen. "CeeCee, go! Use Surf again!"

This time, CeeCee slid forward on his belly, gliding through the mud. As a tidal wave rose beneath him again, the Onix ducked its head, bracing itself.

As the wave ended and CeeCee landed on his stomach once more, water was dripping steadily from the Rock-type, but it still stood, weary.

"Use Iron Tail, Onix," Bruno commanded. The beast raised its heavy tail, steeled in white energy, then slammed it straight onto CeeCee's back.

The Dewgong raised a sharp bark of pain, and for a moment I feared his spine broken, and him dead under the super-effective weight. His face fell into the mud, and he didn't make another sound.

I stood, waited, and was relieved to see him flop over as Onix removed his massive tail. "Return, CeeCee," I said, shaking my head. "Lyrica, go!"

My Nidoqueen stood, eyes narrowing as the light cleared. "Knock him out with Superpower."

"Earthquake, Onix!"

The stone behemoth smashed his tail into the muddy ground, sending a ripple straight to Lyrica. She got on all fours, bracing herself as the tremor shook her—it was super-effective, after all—and was relieved to see her stand again after the shocks wore off.

She raised her fists, both shining with energy. Lyrica charged forward, slamming both of them into the Onix's lowered face.

It spasmed, then fell. As its chin hit the ground, mud slapped at Lyrica's belly and arms.

"It seems you've reduced my team to their final member," Bruno said, calmly withdrawing his second Onix. "Meet the true fighter on my team—Machamp."

As he spoke, the light from his Poke Ball cleared and I could see the final evolution of young Machop and brutal Machoke. Machamp was only five feet tall—taller than Lyrica by a foot, but shorter than both Bruno and me—but muscled thickly. Not only that, but he had four massive arms, each looking capable of crushing steel with little effort.

I recalled my Nidoqueen, even as she stared down the brawling beast. I wasn't risking her life—not when I knew who would fight this battle more efficiently.

"Kashen, let's go!" I called for the second time. He spread his wings, showing their green insides to the Machamp as he prepared for liftoff. "Fly!"

He took to the air, circling Machamp from the lifted ceiling. It only used Bulk Up from below, powering both its massive Attack and Defense.

_Shit. I hope Kashen can still take it out, _I thought, as the Charizard dove. He hit Machamp's chest like an arrow drawn to a bulls-eye, but Machamp didn't fall; instead, two of his long arms reached around and locked Kashen to his chest. The Charizard struggled, beating his wings and claws, but Machamp kept his grip tight.

I was confused. A Hyper Potion couldn't reach from here, and besides… what was Machamp doing?

"Machamp," Bruno said stonily, "Rock Tomb."

"No—Kashen, fly away!" I cried, gripping the rail around my platform with white-knuckled hands.

He was _double_weak to Rock Tomb—even though he had better defenses than Xander, would it be enough?

Machamp threw Kashen to the ground, and as he struggled to rise, heavy stones started falling around him.

"_Fly!_" I cried, not even necessarily meaning the move. Kashen was fast, but was he fast enough to escape death?

He struggled to his feet, wings stirring the air, and finally managed to pull himself above the thrown rocks.

"Oh, thank gods," I breathed as he unsteadily took to the air. In another moment, he collapsed on top of Machamp in a weak Fly attack. They both fell in an exhausted heap, Machamp clutching his chest, which had been hit twice, and Kashen laying limply beside him, looking finished.

It was Machamp who didn't rise again, though. Kashen managed—and stayed up.

I'd won my second match.

"We did it, buddy," I said to him as he struggled to my platform. His eyes were tired in his long face, and his wounds didn't look comfortable, even if they weren't fatal. I reached out and smoothed my rough hand over his hot scales, resting under one burning blue eye. I wanted to hug him, although the last time I'd managed that, he was a Charmeleon. "_Youv_did it."

He only managed a grunt. I picked up his chipped Poke Ball, faded to dull terracotta, and recalled my Charizard.

Bruno had recalled his Machamp by then, and had walked around to my platform. His face was grave, but his eyes were bright. "That was a good battle, challenger," he told me, helping me down. "Perhaps even better than the one Champion Green gave me before."

"I was always better than Green," I replied, smiling ruefully. "It was a good battle, Bruno."

"Indeed. Next, you will face Agatha. Go through those doors, and meet your fate." He turned, then stopped. "Good luck, Leaf."

"Thank you." I started to go, but I thought I heard him mutter something like, _You'll need it._

_Well, of course I will,_ I thought. _I didn't get this far on strength or skill alone._

Was luck really all that had fueled my journey?

Was luck what had saved Xander from Mega Kick? CeeCee from Iron Tail? Kashen from Rock Tomb?

Was it failed luck that had sent Tobias, Leroy, and Dusty, and all of those that came before into their graves?

_Just let my luck hold out a little longer, _I pleaded to emptiness. _And let their luck hold out indefinitely._


	35. Vs Agatha

**Locke and Key: **_A Nuzlocke Story_

__**A/N: **Love to my busy editor **FirebirdXoX** 3  
Just two chapters to go, besides the epilogue..  
And it looks like so far, HeartGold is the next 'locke c;

* * *

Dark-powered fangs and hypnotic ghosts dominated my third match. I stood on the challenger's side, hair stirred from battle wind, while Agatha stood in a cloak of darkness. All I could see of her was long silvered hair, which fell over her small shoulders and gave her away.

Before me was a sleeping Golbat. Before her was nothing—but I knew her strongest Pokemon lurked in the gloom around her. I realized what was going on too late—I dropped to my knees, rummaging in my bag for a Full Restore to heal Xander, but I wasn't quick enough.

"Gengar," said she of the shadows, a cold gleam in one pale eye, "Nightmare."

The creature materialized from the darkness—the only things I could see of it were full, bright red eyes and a white grin. It was approaching Xander, where he lay weak and sleeping. I was searching frantically for a Full Restore—where the hell were they? I'd bought fifty or so, as cavernous as my bag was…

I looked up in disbelief. Gengar was visible now; Agatha's side of the room was cloaked in darkness, but the challenger's side was faintly lit. He laid a hand on my sleeping Golbat, then closed his red eyes as energy flushed into the winged Poison-type's mind.

_"No!" _I wailed, flinging myself at the rails. Xander screeched as his Nightmare thrashed inside of his head. He'd been weak from the Shadow Ball that had taken him in the stomach, and then Hypnosis… I had tried to heal him, but another Shadow Ball had made my items futile, and then this…

"Xander, wake up, please!" I could only watch from the platform as my Golbat lingered in anguish, haunted by neurotic dreams until his brain stilled.

I almost expected him to fly up, flip spastically, and attack me with outstretched wings and a loyal cry. I expected him to rise, as Lyrica had, and finish the battle for me.

But I knew he was gone. My fourth capture, Xander of Mt. Moon, who had loved me enough to at least attempt evolution, was dead.

I couldn't cry, though. My heart ached, but I didn't sob. I couldn't.

There was still a battle to finish.

"Lyrica," I said, throwing her Poke Ball forcefully onto the field. She emerged, looking with unease at the blackness, until her eyes found the cold, unmoving body of Xander. Her pale jaw dropped, and she knelt beside the Golbat, cradling his body in her arms.

"No, Lyrica," I said, eyeing Agatha warily. The old witch might have decided to take this time to prepare a Shadow Ball. "We'll mourn him later. Earthquake."

She turned furious eyes on me, but I only stared. I had to keep going. Xander and all of the others didn't die for nothing.

Lyrica carefully put his body aside, then stiffly pounded her arms into the floor. Earth rippled in a great fissure, and we knew it hit Gengar when we heard a ghastly screech of pain.

We never heard him hit the floor, but we saw the darkness dissipate, and we knew that we had won. Frederick's Earthquake had rid us of Arbok, and Rock Slide her Golbat; Xander had taken out her first two ghosts.

The last had taken him out.

I'd won, but at a cost. A terrible cost.

"Challenger," came a solemn voice from behind me. Agatha had walked around to my platform, and she was even shorter than she looked on camera. She leaned on a cane, and her white hair was loose and pale in the dimly-lit room. Her face was wrinkled and weathered, and her frown bitter. "I'm sorry for your loss."

"So am I." I wouldn't share my pain—my Xander—with this old murderer. But she wouldn't let it go at that.

"Don't act like I meant to kill him, child." Her voice cracked like a whip. She didn't _sound _old. "I am a member of the Elite Four! My duty is to protect my place. Your Golbat died to ensure your victory, so don't weaken its sacrifice. Move on."

"I wasn't going to quit," I spat. She was starting to remind me of Lt. Surge, and that was something I could do without. "And I don't need your pep talk."

Agatha smiled crookedly, despite my blatant disrespect. "Samuel told me you were something special. He's a big bag of wind, that old boy. I don't see anything special. I see an angry girl."

"I am angry. You would be too." My anger was fading, though. I was feeling something else now. I wasn't sure what it was. I fucking suck at putting names to feelings—I'm sure misery and acceptance were in there somewhere, maybe under different names.

"Yes. I would. But I would never have lost a Pokemon in the first place," the old woman said dryly. "Now, why don't you pick yourself and your Golbat off the floor and defeat Lance. Samuel's a big bag of wind—but he wouldn't lie."

I realized that "Samuel" was Professor Oak. Weird, I'd never really thought of him as having a first name, or a life at all, but Agatha seemed to hold him in high regard.

"Who are you to him?" I asked.

Her smile turned sad. "Oh, I knew him long ago… he was a great trainer, that one. He could've conquered every region on this earth, but he put down his Pokemon and picked up a lab coat, and now he contents himself with handing out monsters to kids."

I didn't know what to say. I knew Oak had been a magnificent trainer in his day, but Agatha sounded so bitter about his retiring. "He was old. _Is _old."

"When he quit being a trainer, he was twenty-nine," she said sharply. "I told him not too, but… men will be men. More importantly, people will be people. Oak lost his best two Pokemon in the Elite Four, and he abruptly released the rest of them into the wild and went to college to research Pokemon instead of destroying them." She huffed. "Or so he lectured me later."

_Oak's Pokemon died, too? _I thought about the day I'd caught Xander. Tobias and Kashen had been right by my side; we'd found Team Rocket looting fossils and destroying tunnels in the cave. It was so long ago. I was a different person then, and Xander had been a different Pokemon. "I know how he felt," I said miserably. "I'm not giving up, but after this… if there's anyone left… I'm letting them go, and I'm going home."

There. I'd said it. I didn't know how I could go back to a normal life, with high school and homework and a job at some fast food place, but… how could I _possibly _keep destroying Pokemon's lives? Keep forcing them to their deaths for my gain?

I reached up to Lyrica again, and she put a massive paw on my shoulder. Agatha stared solemnly. "It must be hard, for two great trainers to quit their conquests."

"Two?" I looked up, confused. Agatha's pale eyes regarded me coolly.

"Oak didn't lie. Get up and go fight Lance, girl. After this is done, I will pay my respects to your Golbat wherever you bury him. He deserves that." With that, she strode back to her side of the room, and the shadows consumed her.

I sat there, staring at nothing. The cameras were still on. They'd seen my anguish, and they were making a TV show of my Golbat's death. That thought was enough to make me bolt to my feet.

I took Xander's Poke Ball out and recalled his limp body, then tucked it away in my backpack. "I'm sorry. You've heard me say that so many times, but never to you. You deserved much better. And you went out like a hero—Tobias would be proud of you. Just like I am now."

I brushed away the new dampness under my eyes. _Not on camera, Leaf, _I told myself.

With that, I nodded to Lyrica, and entered the next hall.

* * *

Lance and I had the same amount of Pokemon—I now had five—but his were dragons.

I only had three Pokemon who would help me in my next match.

Before I opened the doors leading to Lance's room, I released those three so that they could gather around me. I wanted to make sure they were fully healed—and fully prepared. _They _hadn't watched Lance battle on live TV.

They had never defeated a dragon.

"Listen to me," I said, observing my team. Flitz regarded me with his small black eyes, but his grin had receded into a frown. CeeCee looked at my face, whimpered softly. Kashen only stared at me, arms crossed over his chest. They all knew about Xander—everyone on my team knew when someone had died.

"Lance is the final member of the Elite Four. After this, we fight Green—and then we're champions. We've got to beat them both… but Lance has dragons. We've never faced him before, like we have Green, and we've never faced Dragonite or Dragonair."

I looked at Flitz. "You've got Gyarados and Aerodactyl. I'm not risking Thunder—Spark will have to serve against at least Gyarados." He nodded.

CeeCee and Kashen both looked at me expectantly. "Dragon-types have two weaknesses: Ice and Dragon. That's where you two come in. CeeCee, you've got Ice Beam, so you'll take on at least his Dragonairs. Kashen, if things get bad with CeeCee, you'll come out with Dragon Claw. Got that?"

My Dewgong bobbed his head up and down rapidly, eager to please. Kashen said nothing, only stared. _Is he seething over Xander's death? _I figured he was. Xander had been with me since he was level seven; he'd known Kashen as both a Charmeleon and a Charizard. The only one Kashen had known before him was Tobias, and he'd known Xander longer.

"I know you guys can do it. I would never have walked in here if I thought you couldn't." I bit my lip, fighting the wave of sorrow that crashed onto me. "I… I love you guys."

Flitz looked up, surprised, and CeeCee barked happily and attacked my legs. I laughed shakily, patted them both on the head—one smooth and metallic, one sleek and cold. As I did, I looked into Kashen's face again, and he blinked once.

"Lance is the last one—before Green," I repeated, as if to reassure myself. "Let's go kick his ass."


	36. Vs Lance

**Locke and Key: **_A Nuzlocke Story_

**A/N: **Only one chapter and an epilogue left…

Thanks for the reviews/alerts, everyone. :D  
And to my editor, as always. :3

* * *

Lance was everything he was on TV, and more. This guy had something I'd never have—something very few TV personalities have in person. _Presence._Maybe it was the fact that he had dragons at his belt, but his confidence touched me even from my platform.

I observed his arena first—it was much like Bruno's had been, but with a stable hard floor. Your typical stadium, in truth. His dragons needed no cold water, no dirt, no shadows.

From our standard distance, I could see his high cheekbones and flame-colored hair. His eyes were bright and almost feverish, and his smile was calm—it went ill with the rest of him, actually.

His dark cape skimmed the floor. Seriously, he was wearing a cape.

"Greetings, challenger," he called. "As you probably know, I am Lance, the final member of the Elite Four. If you defeat me, you will face the Champion of the Pokemon League."

"Yupp," I said, all lackluster. Who cared about the camera? I was still only here to win.

"Very well then. Are you prepared?" He punctuated this question by drawing his first Poke Ball.

"As much as I'll ever be," I answered.

He laughed. "As we all are, challenger. As we all are. Very well. Let this match commence!"

He tossed the Ball, releasing a familiar blue and white beast with a face of whiskers and fangs. Gyarados—not technically a dragon, but a Pokemon of immense renown and power.

"Flitz, go! Use Spark!"

As soon as my Electrode appeared on the field, his round body stormed with electricity. He rolled faster than my eye could follow—straight into the Gyarados, whose double weakness caused it to roar in agony.

It didn't scare me. It wasn't the worst weapon in Lance's arsenal—Gyarados was just the opening note to a song of blood and valor, really. I watched without expression as the enormous blue and white beast crashed to the ground, fangs jostling in its ferocious head.

Lance recalled his Pokemon without batting one fine eyelash. He was all for the camera, this one. "Dragonair, go!"

I recalled Flitz as he spoke—there was no reason for me to use Electrode now. A graceful serpentine creature appeared on Lance's side of the field, coiling delicately. It was far less fierce than Gyarados; in fact, Dragonair was beautiful, in a way. It shone, gemlike, uniquely sapphire rather than blue—a deadly beauty.

I chose Kashen for this match. As the light from his Ball faded and he unfurled his wings, I commanded, "Dragon Claw that fucker, Kashen."

As I spoke, Lance pulled his arm back and suavely ordered, "Dragonair, Dragon Rage!"

The snake-bodied dragon was quicker than it looked, but Kashen managed to drag his glowing red claws across it just as it breathed green fire in his face. They disentangled, glaring at one another—Dragonair's sleek blue body dripped red from the attack.

"Again! Dragon Claw!" This time, the end came quick—Kashen pulled his arms back and let the furious hits fall where they would. The dragon fell, red staining its battered blue body.

"Dragonair, go!" He called again, unfazed. I groaned—an identical Dragonair appeared, this one unbloodied and glaring fiercely.

"Repeat, Kashen! Dragon Claw!" He darted forward, long claws glaring under the lights, but this dragon wasn't going to fall in one hit. It slithered forward as his claws raked over it. Simultaneously, Lance gave his command:

"Thunder Wave!" After hearing its orders, Dragonair swiftly drew its coils over Kashen, static running from its body to his. His wings clipped, Kashen slumped, eyes burning furiously.

"Oh, damn it," I muttered to myself. There was no way he was going to outspeed the little fucker now, and what if he _did_survive the next attack, but he seized up?

"Return, Kashen," I said, withdrawing him. "CeeCee, you're up!"

No sooner was my Dewgong on the field than Lance commanded, "Hyper Beam."

I stared in shock. Hyper Beam was one of Lance's signature moves, but I wasn't aware that his pre-evolved dragons could use it. It arched its sapphire neck, a powerful beam plowing its way into CeeCee from its mouth. Luckily, he took the hit in stride, and ignoring the burn marks that flecked his white pelt, he released an Ice Beam that took the panting dragon in its delicate chest.

The serpent fell—and Lance recalled it, still not visibly worried. _He's down three,_ I thought, observing him. _He still has his two best players, though, so why would he worry?_

"Aerodactyl, go!"

_Interesting. _The light faded, revealing a prehistoric reptilian thing with stone pieces for scales, a long mouth full of teeth, and slender wings. Not technically a dragon, but nor was Gyarados.

I promptly withdrew CeeCee, who was injured from Hyper Beam. _I need someone to take a hit or two, so I can heal Kashen and CeeCee, _I thought, glancing worriedly at my belt. Frederick or Lyrica would do the job, but… "Lyrica, go!" My Nidoqueen once more took the field, looking more than ready to face the beast before her.

"Brace yourself, baby," I called, rummaging through my bag. "I'm going to need you to take some hits for me."

"_Nal,_" she said calmly, planting her feet. Lance smiled.

"Aerodactyl, Hyper Beam."

I clenched my teeth. A white flare engulfed the room, radiating from the energized beam Aerodactyl was shooting at Lyrica. I knelt on the floor, trying to inject Full Restores into Kashen and CeeCee's Poke Balls, but I was trembling so badly that I nearly dropped them both.

_Come on, Lyrica,_ I thought desperately. _Hang in there…_

The bright light faded. I gazed fearfully over my platform's rail, onto the field where Lyrica still stood. She was leaning over heavily, and her tough skin was scorched painfully, but she was _alive._And she still had enough health to attack.

Hyper Beam, you see, is a move that has its sacrifices. The attack takes so much out of the user's body that it must rest after use. Aerodactyl's wings stiffened, and it fell to the floor, panting.

"Lyrica," I said, trying to hide my smile, "Superpower."

Because Aerodactyl was half Rock, the move hit neutrally, but Lyrica's glowing arm thrust him to the floor. Flecks of stone flew into the air after the smashing blow.

"Return, Lyrica," I called, before it could recover. She'd done more than her fair share. "CeeCee, finish this clown! Ice Beam!"

Aerodactyl had staggered to the air again on unsteady wings, and was preparing a move—AncientPower, maybe?—when my Dewgong's frosted breath took him in the chest and sent him reeling.

"Return, Aerodactyl," Lance said. _Still _kept his composure. His last Pokemon was one of legends. "Dragonite."

Dragonite, indeed. It stood at a little over seven feet tall, its golden scales shining like armor under the arena lights. Despite its height, however, Dragonite didn't have an intimidating appearance. Its wingspan was half of Kashen's, its fangs invisible, its claws small and ineffectual.

Yet, I knew from TV reruns that Dragonite's strength didn't rely on his fangs, claws or wings. Dragons burned from within.

And I don't mean that they use special moves.

They used to say that dragon's souls were created as weapons of the legendary Pokemon in their ancient wars. I don't really believe that legendary Pokemon used Dragonite or Garchomp as soldiers in some great battle, but I do believe in the ancient blood that runs in those Pokemon's veins.

There's _some _mystic power there, whatever it may be.

"CeeCee, use Ice Beam," I called, as Dragonite's body began to glow. Literally, it looked as though it were evolving—but the energy was red and orange, like a dancing wildfire.

"Dragonite—Outrage!"

And there it was—the moment I'd been dreading.

Being much swifter and higher-leveled than CeeCee, Dragonite swept forward with blinding speed and power. His entire body began to spiral, then crashed into the Dewgong with dizzying impact.

My Dewgong flew backwards, hitting the base of my platform with a skull-crushing _THUD_.

"CeeCee!" I rushed at the rail, looking frantically for my Dewgong's body. _There's no way he survived that,_ I thought, tearful. _There's no way._

But there was. His Ice-typing gave a tiny resistance… and he struggled forward, bleeding from his head wound, to fire the Ice Beam I'd ordered before his near-death.

The cold beam brought Dragonite to its knees, and it wailed as it began to cover over his stomach and chest.

It didn't fall, though.

Lance and I both used the next turn of battle to heal—the astringent scent of Full Restore permeated the air as both of our Pokemon—visibly battered, but lively with battle spirit—managed to rise again.

I wasn't sure if CeeCee had gotten lucky, surviving that Outrage, but I knew he was the only one of my Pokemon who could. It would have taken Kashen down immediately, and Dragon Claw wasn't going to kill Dragonite—not if it wasn't used by a Dragon-type. The beast was just too strong.

"CeeCee," I said, leaning over my railing. "You're my only hope." There was a risky move… I had to take the chance. Too much more of this, and neither of us would survive to the end. "Blizzard."

"Dragonite," Lance called confidently from his side of the arena, "use Hyper Beam."

Dragonite lowered its head almost as Lance spoke, and fired the same obliterating white ray I'd seen Lyrica tank at CeeCee.

_Surely, you can survive this… you survived an Outrage, for god's sake… CeeCee, come on…_

The white light cleared. Sure enough, my Dewgong was still standing, although he looked as though he was on the brink of death.

His tail glowed silver—he swept it forward, hurling an Arctic storm at Dragonite. To my surprise and glee, it hit its mark—the dragon screeched in a foreign cry, then crumbled to its knees, ice crusting over its body.

We had beaten the dragon master—and no one had died for it.

Lance stared incredulously at his beaten legend, then smiled back up at me—for the cameras, I knew. There was an icy look in his eyes, and a stiffness around his mouth.

"Congratulations, challenger," he called in a brittle voice that almost passed for cheerful. "You're the second person in many years to conquer my dragons."

_Green_, I thought. _My good old buddy Green._

Something occurred to me before I left the room, however. I took Lance by the shoulder, making sure not to dirty his cape, and turned him away from the cameras.

"If you had such powerful Pokemon that_ next to no one_ could beat, why the _hell_didn't you get the League down into Kanto to stop Team Rocket?" I asked forcefully.

He stared at me for a moment. "I'd heard about you bringing them down. You really are the girl who was Giovanni's end, aren't you?"

"It wasn't easy," I said, anger fueling me. "They've killed people, Pokemon… all of the gym leaders were either too afraid or too weak to stop them. They infested three cities, completely overtook the biggest metropolis in Kanto… and you bastards did _nothing!_"

"Giovanni promised me long ago that nothing harmful would come from Rocket Enterprises," Lance said, his mouth twitching. I could tell I was pissing him off, but I was far from caring. The memories of Mt. Moon, of Tradden on Nugget Bridge, of Dusty's mother and Silph Co., of Blaine's haunted face as he told me the story of Mewtwo, were washing over me in a riptide of emotion.

I had come to the end of my journey, but my journey had not been a typical one. No normal trainer has to deal with terrorists. They deal with loss and friendship and rivalries, wins and losses, battles and dreams—not with men in black toting guns and killing their friends, terrorizing towns.

I was a teenage girl. I'd walked out of Pallet Town with no real plans. I just wanted to be a good trainer, maybe make some money and gain a good reputation with the League. I'd ended up taking down the worst threat Kanto had seen in decades, and I got no real credit for it.

That wasn't what bothered me the most, though. It was the blank expression on Lance's face. It was the indifference of the Pokemon League.

It was the fact that I had to face my friend in a few minutes, and the fact that we could destroy each others' lives and dreams with one final battle.

"Fuck you," I said, biting my tongue. Blood filled my mouth, as it filled my eyes. "You're all paid-off plastics who are only here to impress Kanto's youth into becoming trainers. You little bastards can't even take on _one_ criminal organization together, but I took them on with my Pokemon—_me_, a girl half your age."

"Leaf," he said as I stormed to the door. I paused.

"We—I—I thought Giovanni was going to bring good to Kanto. I thought he was going to save us," he said. I was surprised to hear him justify himself to me.

"Save us from _what_?"

"From the broken nation we are." He turned to me, eyes pleading. "You're right. The League did nothing. But the gym leaders could have. The trainers themselves could have. The only two people who even _considered_ taking on Team Rocket were children, and… that's our problem. We _are _broken. I thought… with the dangers… we'd rise together, but…"

"They would have," I said simply. "If _you _had."

I didn't want to hear anymore about it. Team Rocket was dead and buried, and the last obstacle was one I'd been facing since I started this journey.

I closed the door on Lance's excuses—and on my journey itself.

_The end is nigh_, I thought wearily. Five Pokemon left.

_It ends here._

_For some of us, at least._


	37. Vs Green: We'll Say Our Farewells

**Locke and Key: **_A Nuzlocke Story_

* * *

When dawn breaks again, we'll say our farewells  
Our dreams become distant phantoms  
The times we were embraced  
In the light that chased you  
Relying on the warm winds  
-"Shiki no Uta", MINME/Nujabes [English translation]

* * *

_There are stories that are only worth telling once._

Stones were falling, clattering uselessly to the arena floor.

Wind stirred my clothing and battered my face as Pidgeot circled Frederick, wings spread to fullness. Its crimson hair streamed behind it, a banner threaded with dawn-gold—a war flag flying to the sky.

Frederick spread his feet, stone toes curling against the floor.

"Finish this!" I called. "Rock Slide!"

_There are stories that should never be told—secrets, if you will._

This time, the Graveler loaded all four of his worn hands with heavy rocks, and Pidgeot's magnificent wings were pinned.

Frederick cried out in triumph.

"One down," Green said.

We locked eyes, as we had many times. This time, we felt the tug—the tug of destiny. It was the end. Not the end of our lives, or our dreams—but the end, all the same. The end of something great. The end of something terrible.

He recalled the faithful bird that I had been fighting since our Pallet Town departure. I recalled Frederick as well.

"Arcanine!"

The Poke Ball shone under the lights. The beast that emerged was magnificent—its regal face was framed with a mane of white-gold, and it was a cross between the puppy I'd met before and a lion.

_There aren't many stories worth telling again, to tell you the truth._

"Lyrica!" I relied on my faithful Nidoqueen. Upon release, she smiled brusquely at the Arcanine, curling her paws into fists.

Green leaned over the rail on his platform, face hard as marble and just as frozen.

"Use Extremespeed, Arcanine!"

Before I even had time to think of a move, it disappeared, a flash of red lightning. When it reappeared, pummeling Lyrica into the ground with swift feet, I stiffened.

"Earthquake!"

She rose shakily, brushing off the quick blow. Her steel-blue fists—still tight with aggression—slammed into the arena floor.

Arcanine tried to dodge it with dancing paws, but succumbed to the earth all the same.

"Blastoise."

_I can only think of a few._

"Flitz!"

The new fighters locked eyes. Blastoise towered over my Electrode, the mighty top evolution of the little Squirtle Green had chosen in his grandfather's lab.

"Rain Dance, Blastoise," Green said, confidence dripping from his voice.

It brought a familiar gush of dislike to boil under my chest. Even then, I couldn't dislike him. The champion—the boy I loved.

The boy whose life I had to destroy, in order to keep some sanity in mine.

Water began to drizzle from the ceiling. Blastoise's blue skin was beaded with rain, as his rich dark eyes regarded Flitz with unspoken promise.

"Thunder!" I said forcefully. The rain made it a sure hit; Flitz spun, his face grim, electricity pulsing from his red and white exterior. A crashing bolt of lightning fell, jagged, from the ceiling.

_But—what are stories?_

"_Blasss_," the massive tortoise moaned, its massive weight hitting the floor with an indescribable noise. His voice echoed. Green's starter Pokemon fell to its knees, shaking in the rain. I could see tiny white sparks jumping from the cannons on his shoulders.

"Blastoise, come on," Green said. There was a trace of desperation in those blue eyes—the cocky boy I'd despised had become a serious trainer.

"Hydro Pump." It was almost a plea.

I shook my head._ The rain…_It was pounding now, drenching the field, my hair, my clothes, Green opposite me. "Flitz, Shock Wave!"

He was quick, but Blastoise had fired off his shot—superpowered by the Rain Dance—before he could finish charging. The cannons were cocked and loaded. A gush of water fired with enough force to break a human child's back in two was blasted straight into my Electrode's face.

Flitz rolled, as any ball would do, but the expression on his face was one that I'd never seen on any of my dying Pokemon.

I'm sure now that I was crying, but the rain disguised my tears. And yelling, well—who knows what cacophony there already was? This was a champion battle, filmed live.

_Stories are parasitic._

"Trode," Flitz said. The impact had sent him into the base of my platform, so I could stare down at him, rain falling around us. He was smiling, but it wasn't that smug smirk I'd loved on him. It was soft. A smear of love.

"I love you," I told him, sobbing once. My throat felt like a mine that was caving in, killing and crashing, filling the air with smoke and coal dust.

I looked up, saw Green tending to his Blastoise, staring at me with despair on his face.

"Leaf," he said, and I barely heard him through the rain—and through my agony. "Leaf, god, I'm so sorry. I… I had to…"

"CeeCee, go!"

_Stories are insulting._

The Dewgong slid into the rain-soaked field, and when he saw Flitz, turned over and dead, he turned up to look at me.

"Surf," I said. The rain was blinding.

Blastoise—weak to the point of exhaustion from Flitz's Thunder—was taken by the tidal wave.

"Leaf, please." Green looked at me, but I wouldn't meet his eyes.

CeeCee howled once. His cry was like a glass bottle hitting stained concrete. The rain stopped. _This is what it's like to have your heart completely broken,_I thought.

"Exeggutor, go," he said, resigned.

I recalled CeeCee.

"Kashen!"

_You want to suck all of the meaning from my life?_

My starter's mouth flamed around his fangs and snout. The Exeggutor—a towering tree-shaped Psychic type with several faces—cinched its mouths tight as a wall of energy was thrown up before it, barely saving it from Kashen's Flamethrower.

"God damn it," I hissed. "Fly!" _See if Light Screen will save you from this, you son of a bitch._

"Leaf… please, listen to me…" Green was calling to me, and when I finally looked at him—as Kashen smashed into Exeggutor from the air and sent it sprawling—his face was despairing. "Leaf, what are we doing?"

_Wipe the blood from your mouth, and listen to me._

"This is the Champion battle," I said, by way of answer. The cameras rolled. Kashen stood, triumphant, spreading his wings and letting loose a ferocious roar as embers danced. I felt empty—maybe he was feeling my victories for me.

It seemed like Kashen carried most of my feelings in his heart, and expressed everything I could not.

"Leaf, I can't… I can't keep doing this," he cried out. "Look at you!"

"Send out your next Pokemon, damn it," I said. I realized, too late, that I was shouting, yelling, almost on the verge of tears. Kashen roared again, in unison with my bleeding voice.

"I… no, I… if you want the championship that bad… take it." He tried to avert his eyes, but they found the dead orb that laid on my side of the battlefield—my Electrode.

_It never had much meaning in the first place._

"No. No, you son of a bitch. You send out your next Pokemon. _I came this far. THEY DIDN'T DIE FOR NOTHING!_"

I couldn't stop the escalation—one moment I was shouting, only wanting to be heard over the din of the battle, and the next I was screaming in unspent anguish, my throat raw.

Green took a step backwards, bumping into the closed gate that encircled our respective platforms. I could see him hit it, see him shy away from me, a hunter from a rabid beast. He chose his next Pokemon, avoiding looking in my direction at all.

"Rhydon!"

The beast was massive, a stone giant with a spinning drill for a horn. It smashed a fist into the arena, sending a crack through the floor that stopped shy of Kashen's feet. They met eyes, burning rage and stone-cold challenge.

"No, return! CeeCee!"

There was no more rain, but it seemed to me that the arena was still damp from the showers Blastoise and Flitz had danced in—the last dance, it turned out.

_None of our lives mean much._

"CeeCee, Surf!"

"Leaf, stop this," Green cried.

"_STOP TELLING ME TO STOP!_" I slammed both of my fists onto the railing, hitting bone and sending shocks of pain up both arms. "This is the last battle! We can't _stop,_damn it! We are in this to the fucking end!"

As I screeched this back at him, CeeCee slid, his belly lifted by the massive tidal wave that had defeated Blastoise.

Rhydon braced itself, letting the water rinse over him and cleanse his side of the arena.

He didn't fall, though.

Green's eyes glinted, hard. He looked at me with all of the bitterness in the world. I hadn't seen that look—not since he told me his Raticate had died. Not since he'd tried to convince me to stay away from Team Rocket and Giovanni.

"You're right. We can't stop. Because we already started. Rhydon." He nodded to the massive stone behemoth that still stood, dripping wet and shaking from the blow. "Rock Tomb."

The beast grabbed handfuls of stone, and flung them at CeeCee with all of its force.

They hit him hard—hard enough to crack something, hard enough to make him arch his back and squeal in pain. The stones fell all around him, caving in, creating just what the move promised to do—a tomb.

"CeeCee!" I searched the mess of stone, saw him move. The cairn shifted. He wasn't dead. His eyes burned as he emerged, dark with tears and fire. He'd defeated dragons. Blastoise. He could finish this. The Elite Four be fucking _damned_.

"Ice Beam," I told him, and, slowly raising his pale head, he finished Rhydon with a glacier-cold blast to the heart.

Green stood, his face deep in the anguish he was feeling. He was destroying me, even as I was defeating him.

_Not mine. Not yours. Not theirs.  
_

"Alakazam," he said.

The last one emerged. The Psychic type, fox-faced and lean, clutched a spoon in each hand, narrow, energized eyes searching the field for its final opponent.

I looked at what remained of my arsenal. My family.

_Kashen—I don't know if he could survive a Psychic… Frederick, there's no way… CeeCee is weakened… Lyrica is weak to its moves…_

I had to do it.

I had to throw my dice, draw my cards, leave the fate of my victory and my Charizard up to luck.

Kashen opposed Alakazam, and Green bowed his head.

"Fly, Kashen!" I cried, knowing two things—that Kashen was faster, that Alakazam's defenses lacked the ability to take on the full-bodied throw, and that while flying, Alakazam couldn't hit him with his mind-blowing Psychic move.

The Charizard took to the air, circling with a predatory gleam in his blue eyes.

Green commanded, "Future Sight."

_Not much time now…_The mind-reading Pokemon bowed its head, energy flowing from its body into the battlefield.

"Kashen, dive!" He tucked his wings, folded into himself, and barreled into the frailer Pokemon. The two of them crashed into the floor, and skidded towards Green's platform.

The two of them both rose again, Alakazam staggering.

"Psychic," Green ordered—it was quiet and it echoed.

_Maybe that's the point._

Kashen screamed in fury and anguish as blue psychic energy swamped his physical form, driving him to the ground, to his knobby orange knees as his wings collapsed around his body.

The flame on his tail flickered.

Alakazam's head rose, and Green frowned.

"Leaf. I'm... we…" He stared at Kashen, lifted his eyes to mine. Whatever he saw on my face must have startled him, or confused him—because he asked my name-as if it were a question. "Leaf?" I hadn't answered him once, not to his satisfaction, and yet his trailing pleas and fragments were unrelenting.

"Kashen," I said softly. My starter, my best friend. I wanted to run down, feel the cold scales, feel the fire within flicker and then die out.

Because when my heart broke, I didn't want to be standing.

"Leaf, I'm so sorry. Damn it. _Damn it_!" He was screaming now, and I just watched him as he did as I had—smashed his fists into the rail. "They pit us against each other, make us murderers, make us killers… just for a title…"

I said nothing.

He slowly raised his eyes, and Alakazam backed away.

"Leaf… wait-"

"Blast Burn, Kashen," I whispered. It carried. Kashen rose, eyes burning, mouth burning, skin burning, soul burning.

As he unleashed his furious red attack upon Alakazam and ended the battle, I thought, exalted, _Fire is life. I still have four who burn strong. We'll burn for you, Xander and Flitz. We're still burning..._

And as Alakazam trembled, then fell, and Kashen collapsed in exhaustion, Green fell to his knees, staring at the scene in shock.

I did the same.

Our eyes met again, and I hoped he couldn't see me cry—but then we were both crying, weren't we?

_Then again, we all know there's no point._

_There's never a point._

_There is a blank canvas, and we can write what we want on it. Calligraphy, graffiti, obscenity._

_We can paint over it in watercolors, in pastels, in blood._

_We can sing of victory or tragedy, and we can go to our graves fearing sin and craving redemption—_

_But there was never a point._

_Life is what _we_ make of it._

_Our lives—and the lives of those we control._


	38. See You, Space Cowboy

**Locke and Key: **_A Nuzlocke Story_

**A/N: **I'd like to thank every single reader this story has ever managed to get. I'm so glad you took the time to take this journey with me, as it's been a long one and sometimes a rocky one - not least of all for Leaf herself.

If you left me a review, I'd like to thank you. You guys are the ones that kept me writing, when at one point I felt like letting the story go. Those of you who critiqued me - well, let me just say that I can't really give you the thanks you deserve, as you've improved my writing entirely.

_FirebirdXoXo,_ you already know that I appreciate you. x3

Finally, this journey has ended - but I can't give up the Nuzlocke spirit. Oh, no. HeartGold is my next destination. Hopefully the outcome is as amazing an experience as this one has been.

Overall - _thank you._

* * *

"See you, space cowboy."

-Cowboy Bebop episode slogan

* * *

Conclusions are so hard. To see the end of something that shaped your life and changed your entire being is both beautiful and heartbreaking. But—as we all know from childhood—all good things must come to an end.

Luckily for some of us, the bad things have to end, too.

I hadn't stayed around long after my earth-shattering victory. Never had Kanto sported two League Champions in such a short amount of time. Never would they again-not in my lifetime, anyway.

Nor had the challenge been so emotional—so perfect for TV. I stood, some massive gold and silver cape being spread over my shoulders, and the hounds came calling, gathering beneath my feet, begging for scraps. I was still in shock, and when I watched the film later, it looked like I hadn't been there at all.

That is, until the questions.

I'd sat there, a plastic smile stretched tight over my pale, sharp face, as I was congratulated over and over again.

Then the people asked me questions. If I was still sad. If I hated former Champion Green Oak for killing my Electrode. Even if I'd planned for Xander and Flitz to die, waving microphones near my lips and pointing lenses into my eyes. You know. _For the story._

I'd been polite enough up to that point. I was nervous, shaky, my vision was blurred; I was hungry, exhausted, apathetic. I could care less about the championship title, at that point. I'd totaled the League, and my gun wasn't empty.

But I'd fired two bullets, and they'd shattered on impact, and now I didn't want to shoot anymore. I'd made up my mind. I was putting my weapon away, and I was going to go heal. Some wounds take time, but I had a feeling that mine would take meditation—and forgiveness.

I knew, as I was bombarded with insensitive question, with the vultures of media, with flashing cameras, that I wasn't nearly ready to forgive anyone just yet.

Least of all myself.

"Get out of my fucking face," I'd snarled, like a cornered dog. In a way, I was. They were leering at me, wanting to evoke some emotional response for the camera, and I was only too happy to give it to them. "Xander and Flitz were my _friends_. My oldest friends. I ate with them, trained with them, slept beside them, nurtured them from Zubat and Voltorb, and then I watched them die. You monsters can have your fucking champ title."

I'd thrown the cape down angrily, stomping it into the dirt. I left the stage, all of my rage breaking over me like some hellish red storm. The Hall of Fame records were still on stage, in a huge silk tapestry that would hang forever in the League vault. I glanced back at it before I left for Kanto, avoiding the questioning and wounded eyes of the media dogs as I did so.

_Champion Leaf Brannigan of Pallet Town, _it was titled in bright green thread. Below that, my trainer ID was threaded delicately.

The girl on that tapestry wasn't smiling. Her eyes were cool and light green, distant and more like mirrors than windows. She was tan from travel, lean from scrounging, and her clothes and cape were new and clean. The light brown hair that hung around her shoulders wasn't tattered and tangled anymore; they'd cut it, washed it, and brushed it for the camera after my victory. I wasn't in ripped jeans and a tank top. I was in some miniature black cocktail dress.

_Is that girl even me?_The taut, drawn mouth and the eyes looked like me, if nothing else.

There were six Pokemon around her, with gender signs and names threaded alongside them. CeeCee the Dewgong, male, threaded in ivory, with big dark eyes and a mermaid's fan of tail. Lyrica the Nidoqueen, female. Her gunmetal colorings were right, but how could you capture her gentle spirit in a tapestry? Flitz the Electrode, genderless. His smile wasn't lively enough. Otherwise, it wasn't hard to draw a ball.

I bit my lip. Frederick the Graveler, male, stout and calm. Xander the Golbat, male. His love had caused him to attempt evolution so many times. What a waste. A waste of a friend.

Kashen the Charizard, male. I touched his Poke Ball lightly. On that tapestry that would hang in the Hall of Fame for years, Kashen looked cool and unreachable, as I did. No one but me knew the anger he carried inside of him. No one knew how I'd ruined him, and how now we bled as one.

"Fly us home, Kashen," I whispered, tossing his Ball into the air. "Let's just go home."

He appeared before me, and I could hear the flashing of cameras behind us. _They really don't give up, do they? _He lowered his neck, and I slithered onto his shoulders, holding tight to him, as always.

* * *

I hadn't seen Green.

The last thing I remembered of him was his face, so broken, as his team was defeated one by one. I had stared back at him, our eyes were clashing like always, and I wanted to reach for him. I wanted to submerge my reaching hand into the depths of his pool-water eyes, and I wanted to bring him close to me.

That's the feeling I want to remember. I don't want to remember my hatred, that ragged blade in its unskilled but furious hand. I don't want to remember his Blastoise killing Flitz. I don't want to think about his life coming apart before him, his dreams being crushed by my Charizard's resurrection.

I don't know what happened to him, after they crowned me Kanto League Champion and took pictures for my tapestry in the Hall of Fame. I had searched the crowd at my "coronation", of sorts, but I hadn't seen eyes like a winter sky. I hadn't seen that confident, self-possessed smile.

It was only when I returned home that I realized that he'd changed, too.

Maybe he couldn't smile like that anymore.

My mother had been standing on the front porch of our old patchwork house, wringing her tired hands and searching the skies for me. When I climbed off of Kashen's shoulders and went to her for a hug, she threw herself at me, gripping me tightly.

"I'm so sorry, Leaf," she said, sounding on the verge of tears. _Mom? About to cry? _She didn't start with 'I'm proud of you', or 'congrats', or, 'good job baby!'.

No, she must have seen something on my face. Something in dire need of love, of comfort, of reassurance. Of pity, even.

"Mom… I… are you okay?" I managed to choke out. My hands found the small of her back as I hugged her. She was painfully thin, thinner than me, even.

"I am now that you're home." She buried her head in my shoulder, and I smelled the familiar scent of her hair, streaked with gray but otherwise much like mine. "I watched all of your victories, Leaf. And… I just have to say that you are everything I thought you wouldn't be. You are an amazing trainer. You are a winner. A fighter." She clutched me, and she might've been crying, I don't know. That was shock enough. Before I'd left for my journey, I hadn't cried at all, having learned that from her.

I guess it stopped mattering to both of us.

I tightened my embrace, remembering our last encounter, after Silph Co.'s tower had collapsed beneath me.

"I am not a trainer anymore," I said, instead of everything I could have said. "I gave up my championship. I'm turning in my trainer card."

She jerked away from me at that, green eyes shocked and damp. She looked so much older. It made me feel like I did, too.

"What?" She asked, frowning. "Leaf, what are you talking about? You're Kanto's Champion. You can't give up."

"I'm not giving up. I won. I did what I wanted to do." I turned around to face the evening, instead of her accusing, bewildered face. "I'm going to need some time to think about everything. Every_one_. A lot has happened to me, Mom. And someday I'm going to tell you all of it."

"I believe you," she replied softly. "So what are you going to do with your Pokemon? Without a trainer card, they won't let you keep them."

"I'm not going to keep them," I answered vaguely. I had only just realized what I meant to do.

* * *

"Pokemon Tower is not a place I want to bury my friends," I said to empty air. Nighttime over the raided caves of Mt. Moon was dismal and shadowy, but this is where I'd found my third capture, fourth Pokemon, and second-oldest living friend.

I set my shovel aside, brooding. Xander was gone. I hadn't sent the invite to Agatha, like I'd thought I would. I realized now that she'd been doing her job, killing him with a Gengar. I'd been trying to prove myself by sending him to his death. It was who we were.

_Were, _I thought, softly.

I meant to change. I knew that.

"Goodbye, Xander," I said to the night, and beside me, Kashen let out a thick, agonized growl. It echoed against the mountains, and it loosened the burdening weight from my shoulders.

We flew next to Rock Tunnel, another mountainous region, where I'd caught Flitz as a Voltorb. I had to bury him in his Poke Ball, as I'd had to do with Xander—there was no way I was going to look into their faces as I did it.

I wasn't even sure I deserved that.

As I tried to think of some words to say, some prayer, I heard the grass rustle around me. I turned, expecting to see Spearow or Rattata, but instead I saw Green Oak.

"What are you doing here?" I asked without hostility. I had too many feelings to let one take the lead, that was for sure.

"Your Electrode's name was Flitz, right?" He sat down, uninvited, next to the little grave I'd dug. He had changed clothes since I saw him last, being Green, but he wasn't smiling.

"Yeah." I wanted to smoke, for the first time in months. It made me sad. The last cigarette I'd touched was after Leroy died. I'd weathered Dusty's death, Xander's and Flitz's, without relying on a bad habit, but there it was, that familiar, dull ache in my lungs and heart.

I looked at Green, focusing on him to blunt my craving. He was staring at the plot, where my friend lay inside.

"I don't know why I never named my Pokemon. I never really thought about it, I guess," he said. Even in moonlight, his hair was the color of exposed wire, and his skin looked tan, not pale, like mine did. "I like that you did."

"I didn't ask you to follow me here, Green."

"I killed him." He said this off-handedly, not sad or happy or uncaring, just like it was a fact. Which it was. "I have to pay my respects. He died at my hands, and I'm not going to forget that anytime soon."

"At least you're the Champion now," I said abruptly. I couldn't talk about him killing Flitz. It made me want to punch him—which was better than me wanting to kiss him, I supposed, but not by much.

"No, I'm not." He looked up at the night sky, leaning back on his hands and mentally counting stars.

"What?"

"I gave it up. Lance is Champion again."

"Why? You deserved it!" I stared at Green, wondering who was really sitting beside me at my Electrode's makeshift funeral.

"No, I didn't. I'm not gonna argue with you about it, either. I know I'm right, and I know what I'm doing. That's that." He smiled at me, and it didn't have any humor in it.

My mouth fell open. I had to remember to close it. "Well… you came at a bad time."

"No. Your mom told Grandpa what you were about to do." He shrugged. "You can't let them go, Leaf. You're a damn good trainer, and they have no home without you. Those Pokemon are willing to die for you—shouldn't you be willing to die for them?"

_Oh, this, _I thought, angrily. "It's none of your fucking business, Green."

"Like hell it isn't."

And just like that, he leaned forward and brushed his lips against mine.

I blinked, shocked at the taste of him and the feel of his mouth.

"Maybe you don't want to be a trainer anymore," he said, pulling away slowly, "but you don't have to give up your friends."

There was a double entendre there, I know there was.

I touched my mouth, wondering.

"I guess not," I said.

* * *

I did see Oak before I left. He was my final stop.

Kashen and I waited outside of his lab. When he finally appeared, looking solemn instead of pleased, I felt tears in my eyes.

_Oh, stop it,_ I thought, angrily. _You can't start with this now._

So, I tilted my head back, the way I used to when I was a child and I had to prevent myself from crying in front of someone. It worked this time, as it had before.

"Leaf," Oak began, as my head was thrown back to look at the sky.

"Well. I told Green he was the Champion now. Apparently he gave it up for Lance."

"Two champions in a week's time," Oak noted with a smile, "and they both give up their titles. You two aren't like most kids, I've always known that. Especially you."

My lips twisted into a smile. By now, it felt foreign, but it was a comfort nonetheless.

"So, Leaf, tell me. What are you planning on doing?" His voice held a sharp edge in it now.

I sighed, lowered my face to meet his gaze. To this day, his eyes sent a chill running down my spine. I remembered how admiring I'd been of Samuel Oak's very presence, and it made my smile feel a bit more natural.

"I'm giving up being a trainer," I said. "At least for now. There's really no way I can pick up where I left off, either. You know that."

Oak, to my surprise, nodded softly. "Don't I."

"But I've never had your brains or even close, and there's no way I could study Pokemon like you do. I can't really do much."

"Maybe there's just nothing left for you here," he said, sounding idle. "My advice to you, Leaf, is to figure out what's ahead of you. Don't abandon your friends." I touched the belt studded with my remaining Poke Balls lightly, then nodded. "They can help you decide, after all. And it isn't only you who needs them. They need you, too."

Honestly, I _had_ wanted to release my Pokemon back into the wild. A _Free Willy_kinda thing, you know? But how could I? They were too powerful to coexist with their species like they once did. I'd snatched them from their homes while they were young and impressionable, and I'd molded them into the Pokemon they were now.

As they'd molded me.

But Oak was right. I was callous, and I was selfish, but I couldn't be both. CeeCee, Lyrica, Frederick, Kashen-they were mine, and I belonged to them, too.

And...

Oak was right about something else, too.

There was nothing left for me here.

I could see that now.

* * *

"Well, there's no reason for _real _goodbyes, are there?" I asked Kashen as I awkwardly climbed up onto his shoulders. Under the cover of approaching night, Rattata and Pidgey sang freely and ran about, in this place where I'd started my journey.

Kashen grunted as I settled myself on his shoulders. I could feel the muscles in his back rippling as he spread his wings.

"I'll take that as an agreement," I teased, stroking him around the horns. He had so many little scars that I'd never noticed before, scars that came from battling.

"Besides... Oak will comfort Mom. Green still has a destiny ahead of him here. I don't know what, but I know he'll find it. He's smart, pretty, talented, influential... he should have nothing to worry about," I said, convincing myself.

Kashen snorted, shuffling his feet impatiently. As I felt the heat from his sunset-colored skin and the leather of his wings, I was reminded of Giovanni and Blaine, and the destructive monster they'd birthed.

_Am I any different? _I wondered. Something pure and innocent and trusting became demonic after abuse and brainwashing. Mewtwo, in return, had lashed out against its human captors and creators, and fled to the wild.

As I lightly brushed my hand against Kashen, I wondered if maybe someday he'd see me for the monster I was, and leave me for dead... or kill me himself. I hadn't abused Kashen, ever, but maybe he'd breakdown one day.

I thought of Mewtwo, and I thought that maybe someday he'd come to terms with the death he'd seen, the destruction he'd caused. Maybe it would seek human contact again someday, and forgive humanity its follies.

I knew I would have to learn to do the same. Maybe Kashen and I would heal together.

"I know, I know, buddy." I smiled, touched his long, warm face fondly. "I know."

So I brought my knees into his side gently, and he took to the skies with a small running start. The Rattata and Pidgey scattered as we ascended, lifting away from Kanto-away from all we'd ever known.

"I promised myself I wouldn't cry anymore," I said, softly. "Not about what we're leaving here, anyway. I know I've shed enough tears over this place, and everyone in it."

I turned and nestled into Kashen's neck, unwilling to look beneath me anymore. There was too much for me to see.

And I had to put my roots elsewhere.

I had to grow away from all of this-we all had to. Me, Kashen, and the rest of them, my motley crew of assorted Pokemon from the Kanto region. We wouldn't forget, but we'd eventually have to learn how to forgive.

However long it took.

Clouds moved around us in a blur, and the wind stung my eyes, bringing cold prickling tears.

Despite myself, I turned again, the receding figure of my home region reduced to fields and spots of city.

"See ya," I muttered to myself. There was nothing left to say.

_Bang._


End file.
